Disclaimer: Any characters, situations or places that you recognized are the trademarked property of Disney, Dreamworks, and their associates. I humbly use their amazing worlds to tell my story to no profit.
Acknowledgements: As always, to the Lady Sorrows, who has not been keeping me company lately but still took the time to edit this. Also to the folks of DLP, who keep me motivated to write.
Notes: a)This was meant to be posted as my New Year's gift to you guys, believe it or not. It was written before even Christmas rolled around. It got delayed so long because the Lady Sorrows couldn't make the time any earlier, and I'd rather wait than subject my readers to the horror that is my unedited work.
100% Sorrows' fault, confirmed.
b) A major complaint for last chapter was the length. I have thought hard about this, and decided that the complaints were not without merit. I hate to break the PoV format, but I decided to try breaking the remaining two chapters down into smaller parts.
Yes, attentive reader, I did say two more. ACE has two more planned chapters, one for Hiccup and the last one for Elsa, before it reaches its inevitable conclusion. However, since I decided to break them up, they will be more in number but smaller in wordcount. The Hiccup chapter is planned to be 3 parts, while the Elsa chapter is planned to be 2. So you can call that 5 more chapters if it makes you feel better.
c) There's another thing. You can blame Tuffnut's death on Wixeron. He is the reason I've always planned to give the Thorston twins a painful death. In fact, you can also thank him for the existence of this fic, because it was reading his story that finally made me realize that the only way of finding a crossover in this fandom that doesn't suck was to write it, myself. My success remains to be seen, but the effort is there.
Conversely, you can thank Foxy's Girl for Ruffnut's survival. Foxy's stories are the reason I like Ruffnut, and why I decided to spare her. Go read her stuff. She writes much better than I ever could.
So, without further ado:
A Chance Encounter
Chapter 11
Act I
~H~
"Would you quit messing with my hair?"
Hiccup swatted at the hand lazily tousling his hair, and glared at its owner, who was sitting on the rock next to him, in mock anger. The girl let out an honest to Odin giggle-before taking hold of a tuft from the back of his head. He let out a sigh, but made no further effort to stop her.
"I can't help it. Look how long it's grown."
A sting of uncertainty. "You don't like it?" Perhaps he was due for a haircut.
"I like it, you dummy." She said, exasperation as evident in her voice as in her eye-roll. Hiccup let out a nervous laugh.
Even now, months into his relationship with Astrid-with Astrid, who would have thought?- He felt like he would wake up any day now and things would go back to how they used to be. With him being … well, him, and Astrid ignoring his existence.
"Snap out of it, Hiccup." He was jostled back to reality by a small, tightly wrapped hand waving in front of his face, and he smiled to hide his embarrassment.
"Sorry, I spaced out for a bit."
"You're hopeless."
He took her hand in both of his, gingerly. He rubbed her fingers with his own, staring at where they were touching, almost expecting reality to be torn asunder and take his happiness away from him, even for such a simple thing.
"Are you having one of your moments?" He looked up and saw kindness in her wide eyes and teasing smile, and he was lost again.
"I seem to be." he replied, gamely. "Give me a few seconds?"
"As long as you need" She said, squeezing his fingers in gentle assurance.
He shook his head. This was silly. He was perfectly capable of interacting with his girlfriend without turning into some sort of nervous wreck. Occasionally, however, he would have episodes like this one. At least he hadn't tried to write a poem this time. That disaster was never getting repeated.
It just all felt so surreal sometimes, that in a few short months everything had changed so much. He wanted for nothing, because he already had all he'd ever dreamed of. He had the respect of his people, the acknowledgement of his father, he had Toothless and the other dragons integrating with humans; and he had Astrid. He looked at her hand entwined in his. Definitely more than he had ever thought he'd get.
And that was the problem, really. After a lifetime of failure, these last few months had been miraculous, wondrous, and part of him was waiting for the other shoe to drop. Sometimes it crept up on him, a sick ball of anxiety in the pit of his stomach, and he'd know that people like him didn't get this lucky, that it couldn't last, not forever. He'd feel that metaphorical boot hovering pendulously overhead, waiting to stamp out his happiness forever.
Astrid's golden head snuggled itself further into his shoulder, diverting his dark thoughts. She was good at that. His frown softened and he rested his head atop of hers.
He smiled and averted his gaze, his eyes landing on the forms of Toothless and Stormfly, lazing about under the sun, their harnesses a few feet away. For that matter, they'd been here for a while, hadn't they?
"We should head back." He noted. Astrid groaned dramatically and pushed herself closer to his side, almost making him fall over. Hiccup wrapped his hands around her instinctively, even as color rushed to his cheeks at her proximity. Almost laying on him as she was, her head rested on his shoulder. He turned, in what he hoped was a discreet fashion, and inhaled the smell of her hair. Not quite sweet, but one unique to her that he'd come to recognize as so clearly Astrid.
"Let's stay a while more." She asked, looking up at him with wide pleading eyes. Hiccup groaned, knowing he had no chance.
"Okay. But don't whine to me when you get hungry."
She smiled triumphantly and snuggled back into a more comfortable position. Idly, her hand crept up his back and started playing with his hair again. It had grown to the point of reaching his neck, something she had been keen to point out. He would have objected, but the feeling of her fingers across his scalp was killing any desire he had for complaints.
"You should do something with your hair."
"I thought you said you liked it."
"I do, but still, you should do something."
"Like what?"
"I have an idea."
She sat up straighter as she said this, disentangling her hand from his hair and reaching for her ponytail. With one swift movement, she'd removed the leather band she'd used to hold it, shaking her head so as to allow her hair to fall freely around her shoulders. It glowed, golden, under the afternoon sun. Hiccup swallowed hard, suddenly feeling several degrees hotter. He knew she always kept a spare tie around her wrist, she'd done that on purpose. Freeing her hair like this for him, however little it lasted. It was both a promise for things to come and an invitation-nay, a challenge-, to make them happen.
Astrid smiled at him teasingly and reached for his hair.
"Wait, wha-"
She shushed his objections as she took hold of some of the hair on the back of his head and expertly began tying it back with the band.
"But Astrid! Aren't hair ties, I dunno, girly?"
She had apparently finished her work, because he felt a sharp pain bloom on his arm, just below the shoulder. She'd punched him!
"Ouch! That hurt, you know!" he said as he rubbed the sore spot. Astrid was glaring at him.
"That is for being judgmental. Bands are perfectly practical for both genders. Why, your dad sports several in his beard."
Difference being, he didn't have a beard. Though he thought that, Hiccup had the good sense not to say it. He'd already been hit, and didn't fancy another one. She would always punch him in the same spot, too.
He reached a hand to the back of his head and felt around, taking hold of the mass of hair that Astrid had tied. Despite what she had said, she hadn't caught enough for it to be considered practical, his hair still fell about his face. Only a token amount of hair was caught, just enough for the band to work. A purely aesthetic choice, then. Still, it wasn't that bad.
"I guess I can live with a band." He said.
Her expression morphed into a satisfied smile before turning mischievous. Before Hiccup had time to question her on it, she had taken hold of his shirt and pulled him closer, gently touching her lips on his. Hiccup smiled and cupped her cheek with one hand, drawing her in. Getting to kiss Astrid still felt delightfully unbelievable to him. A minute later, or perhaps more, they separated, both blushing heavily but with equally satisfied smiles on their faces.
"What was that for?"
"For being you."
Smiling, he took hold of her hand again as they laid back on the furs they were sitting on. Perhaps they could stay out here for a little while longer.
Was it too early to tell her he loved her?
~H~
Hiccup awoke with a surge, finding himself in a sitting position and panting heavily. It took him a few seconds to recognize the strange surroundings and the unfamiliar, crumpled sheets. It took several more to still his hands that had automatically reached for the person that should be sleeping next to him.
When reality reoriented itself, he fell back into the ridiculously soft pillows with a groan. He pushed sweat-slicked hair out of his eyes, considering his troubled sleep. He hadn't dreamed of Astrid in a good while. The dream, unlike others that would melt out of consciousness even as he tried to remember them, was actually a memory, and thus he could recall it with perfect clarity. His chased the memory away with practiced ease, pushing it back down to where he kept all his memories of Astrid. He treasured every one, but they lived behind locked doors in his head, only to be opened if he didn't feel like functioning that day. He couldn't afford to do that. Not anymore.
What had brought this on, anyway? He hadn't had such trouble with them for a long time.
The realization hit him as soon as memories of last night resurfaced. Oh. Thats why.
He groaned again and pulled the blanket up over his head. He certainly had a talent for such situations, didn't he? Stuck between his growing feelings for Elsa and the ghost of his wife. How wonderfully pathetic of him. The worst part was, he was no closer to figuring out what he was going to do about it than he was last night. Gods, how did he always make such a mess of things?
This was supposed to be his vacation. Vacation. He took a couple months to himself every year whenever possible, to relax. To unwind. Not to make his life even more complicated.
Still, no use snivelling over it now. He'd gotten himself into this, he'd have to figure it out. He had to. He'd promised. Now, if only he knew how.
He got up with a groan, absently noting the shadow of Toothless' curled form on the balcony. He still hadn't had the door repaired, the broken wood lay against the balcony's wall where he'd left it. He'd get around to it sometime. In the meantime, the draft was quite nice.
He took a bath, then saw to Toothless' breakfast before heading to his own. This time he did not need Anna to drag him down to have breakfast with them, something he was still embarrassed about. He wouldn't avoid Elsa, even though she'd made it clear that she wouldn't continue their tentative relationship, if it could be called that, until he sorted out his feelings. Which, admittedly, spoke to her character far more than it did his. That was alright. Hiccup never claimed to be a strong person. He'd had to be on several occasions, out of necessity, but strength had never been in his nature.
Thankfully, the breakfast room was almost filled to the brim with people. Besides the royal sisters and himself, Kristoff was also present, as was the entirety of the Queen's inner council, along with three people that Hiccup was pretty sure he'd never seen before. A bigger table had been procured for the occasion and more servants were milling about to cater to everyone.
The Queen gave him a polite but warm greeting, as was proper, before returning to her various discussions. Hiccup was occupied by the Princess, who seemed particularly eager to talk to him. That seemed strange to Hiccup. Surely Elsa had talked to her about last night. Shouldn't Anna be … angrier? Shouldn't she be shooting off warnings and threats and glaring at him?
But no, the redhead seemed content to make small talk with him about various things. One thing she said, however, varied from the norm. She leaned closer, conspiratorially, and talked low enough that only he would hear.
"Would you like to see the trolls, Hiccup?"
This caught Hiccup by surprise and he raised an eyebrow.
"Really? The trolls?"
She nodded. "Yes. I remember Elsa mentioning your discussion about them. Would you like to get to know them?"
Huh. Now there was an intriguing invitation. Hiccup remembered talking about the trolls with the Queen on his way here. It had sparked his interest then, if only to try and place some truth to Gobber's claims.
"Certainly. Could I?"
"Of course! I'll see when Kristoff has some time and we will all go together. Tomorrow, perhaps, or the day after, we'll go visit Grandpabbie."
"Sounds great. I look forward to it."
After breakfast, Hiccup was all but dragged along with the Princess, to his great disbelief, Ernie trailing behind dutifully. She insisted they spend time together, be it visiting interesting corners of the castle or taking a long, leisure walk out in the city. Anna had dragged Ernie next to them and practically forced the boy into the conversation. Ernie was flustered at first at the familiarity of the Princess's manner towards him, but soon gave up on formality under Anna's determined assault.
Still, nice as it was to see that the Princess seemed intent on showing him she remained his friend, Hiccup begged off after they had lunch. He had to talk to someone, and he couldn't put it off any longer. He'd postponed it so far so that he would have time to think things through and not act rashly. He asked Ernie to ask her over to his quarters, and went through some interesting paperwork that he'd found while he waited.
The door clicked open, but he did not turn to look at his guest while she strolled over.
"Hey Hiccup." She plopped herself on a chair next to his desk, armor grating against the delicate wood. "I was over at the barracks when your boy got me. What's up?"
At this he did turn, leveling a flat stare at Ruffnut.
"What's with the with the killer look?" Okay, so maybe 'flat' wasn't entirely accurate. He dialed it back slightly.
"What did you do, Ruffnut?"
She attempted a look of confusion, but Hiccup's trained eyes spotted the widening of her own and the awkward shuffling of her hands.
"I have no idea what you're talking about."
She was also a terrible liar. This time, he really did glare at her.
"I won't ask again."
She sighed and threw up her hands in defeat. "Alright, alright, so maybe talking to her wasn't my brightest idea. But honestly, how was I supposed to know you hadn't told her about Astrid?" She had the cheek to throw back an accusing look. "That's bad form, man."
Hiccup had to close his eyes and count to ten. It wouldn't do to kill his subordinate. At least not while in a foreign castle.
When he was certain he had a lid on his anger, he opened his eyes and replied. "Keep your advice to yourself. Do you have any idea what you have done?"
"So what if I scared her a little? No one ever died from that."
Hiccup gaped, he couldn't believe what he was hearing. "You idiot." He snarled. "You tried to intimidate her?"
For a second Ruffnut did her best impression of a frightened rabbit.
"Oh. You ... uh, didn't know about that?"
Hiccup repressed the urge to bash his head on the desk. Or hers. "You could have caused an actual war. If it were anyone other than Elsa, this would have been at the very least a massive diplomatic incident, and severely set us back in negotiations. And that is the best case scenario when you directly threaten the supreme leader of a foreign nation, who also happens to be an insanely powerful sorceress. War, Ruff. That's a record, even for you."
The gravity of her error seemed to begin to dawn on her. "But it was a personal matter, not state."
"It was personal, but not yours. Disregarding that, you're not in a position where you can talk to the Queen and ignore her position."
"And you are?"
"Yes. No! That's not the point here!"
"Really?"
He slammed his clenched into the desk, hard enough for the inkpot to topple and for his hand to develop a sharp ache.
"Dammit, Ruff."
That seemed to snap her out of her sarcastic streak. She was silent for a few seconds, during which the only sound was caused by the ink slowly dripping on the floor.
"I fucked up, didn't I?"
"You certainly did. All the good relations that I developed since I came here, our trade agreement with Arendelle, you put all of that at risk with one of the most spectacularly moronic moves I have seen to date."
"I'm in trouble, right?"
"Damn right you are. I haven't decided what your punishment will be just yet, but you can explain to Barf why he and you will be grounded for the remainder of the year. Anything short of an actual war breaks out, you stay in the village. And don't you dare dally on your way back, either. I know exactly how long it should take you."
The prospect of months of grounding made Ruffnut's face twist into a visage of horror.
"But Hiccup-"
"Shut up." He cut her off, still glaring. He hadn't expected her to actually do the sensible thing and stop talking, he would have rather enjoyed increasing the severity of her punishment.
"What's gotten into you, Ruff? That was stupid, even by your standards."
"Hey!"
"It was."
"Well. I'm sorry, I guess. I just didn't want to see you in a mood again. It seemed like a good idea at the time. I didn't think about it long."
'In a mood'. That was a kind way of describing his funk after Astrid's death. Still, then and now were very different situations.
"You'll have to do better than that." Hiccup insisted. Ruffnut exhaled loudly, running a hand through one of her braids as she thought.
"I just … I've seen how you look at her. How you act around her. I didn't think you could recover from it if she turned out to be using you."
"Wait, what are you saying?"
Ruff looked at him like he was missing the obvious.
"You love her."
Hiccup blinked at her dumbly, his anger totally derailed by this sharp right turn in the conversation. "News to me." He managed after a moment. Ruff snorted.
"Really, Hiccup? Denial? That's what you're going with?"
"It's not denial, it's the truth." He replied shortly, irritation rising like the tide. He leaned back in his chair. "I like her, no doubt, but love? I didn't know you'd turned into such a sap since I last saw you."
"Call it whatever you want, my point stands." Ruff shot back. "What do you see in her, anyway? Magical Queen of a fancy castle, loved by all opposed by none, it seems. I'll bet its been bowing courtiers, sparkling dresses and pretentious dinners her entire life. She was born into this, I bet she hasn't sprained an ankle in her whole life, never mind having to fight for a single thing of value." Ruff said derisively. "After all, that's what servants and soldiers are for."
Hiccup glared at her. "You'd be surprised. We don't have the monopoly on tragedy, or hardship."
She raised an eyebrow, disbelief written all over her face. He shook his head.
"Not my tale to tell."
"Tragedy I can buy, considering her age, but hardship? Really? What, did she run out of glitter for her hair?"
"See, this is exactly why I don't send you on diplomatic missions."
"Right, fine, whatever. Let's not stray from the point."
"That being?"
"Me, asking you what you see in her. Is it her resemblance to Astrid? I admit, I did a bit of a double take when I first saw her. She does kind of look like her. I mean, if you squint. If Astrid had grown up Queen of sparkly dress castle and had a dozen maids to do her hair every day while she played with snow. "
Hiccup ignored her digs at Elsa. Because in her own way Ruff was right on the money, not about Elsa, but about their resemblance. And even then, not in the way Ruff thought about it.
He'd thought about it before, of course. Many times. He had reached no conclusion. Of course, the question had never been about Elsa resembling Astrid, not exactly. No, if that had been it, he would have problems much closer to home, where the culture was similar and he could have found someone who was molded by circumstance to resemble Astrid more clearly. Feisty, blonde warrior women were not exactly in short supply in his part of the world. No. It was more complicated than that.
He'd be the first to admit that there was a superficial resemblance. They were both blond haired, blue-eyed, confident and far, far out of his league. But in temperament they were poles apart.
Astrid had been all fiery temper and quick violence, fated to excel at everything she set her eyes on. She shone the brightest with a weapon in her hand or people under her command. A born Viking Chief if ever he'd seen one. Elsa was more like him. Quieter, more controlled. Fighting, though they did it with different means, was a thing to be done only out of necessity. Elsa was not a warrior, she was a protector. A Queen.
But even so, there was no denying the quiet power that both women possessed. The way they demanded everyone's attention by simply being there, or the way they would assert themselves with but a word or a look. Elsa was different than Astrid in most ways, but sometimes she would say something, stand in a certain way, and it would catch Hiccup like a kick to the ribs. He'd forget, sometimes, just for a second, and turn, irrationally expecting to look at Astrid's face, only to see Elsa and realize his folly.
Was that it, then? Was he simply attracted to women more powerful than him? Women who he should, by all rights, have exactly zero chances with? Or were those instances where Elsa reminded him of Astrid the cause of his attraction?
That couldn't be completely right though, for he found himself equally attracted when Elsa did things Astrid would never do.
He was no closer to finding a solution than he was this morning. All he had managed to do was painfully remind himself that he was still not over his wife's death.
"-cup? Hiccup?"
He was brought out of his musings by Ruff shaking his shoulder, perhaps with more force than necessary. He slapped her hand away with a scowl.
"Don't do that."
"I called your name like ten times. You weren't listening."
"You probably had nothing interesting to say anyway."
She made of show of laughing dramatically. "Look who regained his sense of humor. Stop evading the subject."
"Look, I won't deny some similarities, but that's not all there is to it. I … I'm not even sure, myself."
"So you love the Queen but you don't know if it's because you're projecting your dead wife on her? That's pathetic, Hiccup, even by your standards."
Hiccup frowned at her. "Watch your tongue. You're my friend, Ruff, but I don't tolerate this from anyone, not even you."
She made a show of rubbing her eyes like a child. "Boo hoo, my wife is dead. The world is bleak and terrible and I will never be happy again. Woe is me, cursed be my fate-"
"Ruffnut. Enough."
"Boo hoo, I'm such a wimp that I clamp up for years and can't get over my pain even after-"
"I said enough."
He was seething, and trying his best not to lash out and do or say something that he knew he would later regret. A distant part of himself idly noticed that his hands were shaking, so he closed them into fists.
He could not take out his anger on Ruff. She was trying to help, in her own way. She just … didn't understand.
Ruff's voice was uncharacteristically quiet when she spoke. "Oh, I don't understand, do I?"
Hiccup blinked. Had he said that out loud?
The anger he'd been struggling to hold back drained from him, leaving nothing but a sick, empty feeling. He had forgotten, in his indignation, the empty space by her side. He looked at her. Ruff's eyes were flat with fury, and sparkled with the tears she'd never let fall in his presence. Anyone's presence.
"I didn't mean it like that. You know I didn't." He said quietly.
" You self-centered tit. Do you really think you're the only one hurting from his losses? You really think that you're the one who's had it worst?"
"I don't. That's not what I meant. I'm sorry."
She was fiddling with her braid in a particular way that Hiccup knew meant she was extremely agitated, but unable to beat up whatever was causing her distress. It was a rare sight, to see Ruffnut Thorston nervous.
"Maybe you should have a talk with Snotlout, aye?"
Hiccup flinched. His cousin had never been the same. None of them had, but Snotlout had, arguably, lost the most.
"Do you know what the worst part of losing Tuff was?"
Hiccup closed his eyes, shaking his head slightly.
"You don't have to do this, Ruff."
Again, she ignored him. She wasn't even looking at him, her eyes glazed over in a faraway look. "I get it, you loved Astrid very much and you miss her, but do you know what real loss is? To lose a part of yourself. Tuff was … he was my twin. He was always there. As far back as I can remember myself, it was the two of us. We never agreed, we fought a lot, I didn't even like him all that much most of the time, but he was always there, you know? He was as much a part of me as my hand, perhaps even more so. Every time I woke up, I saw his stupid face across the room, snoring. Every time I ate, he was there, being all gross. Every time I was angry, we would fight. Every time I was crying, he was there, being all awkward and angry in my behalf and getting into fights way over his head. He. Was. Always. There." She said the last part slowly, emphasizing the words as if they meant everything. In a sense, they did.
Hiccup did not dare interrupt. Ruff shook her head in dismissal, a vain attempt to conceal the tears that had escaped her tight grasp on them. When she spoke again, her voice was angry and harsh.
"And that's the way I always thought it would be, you know? Us against the world. Even if I ended up giving up the life of a shieldmaiden eventually, I figured it would always be me and him, just with some new additions to the family. It made me angry, it frustrated me, but there was no thought in my head, no possible future for me without Tuffnut. It seemed inconceivable, until it happened."
Hiccup could not help it, and he placed a hand on her shoulder, squeezing in an attempt at comfort. What she said, what she described … he had been wrong. She really did understand. He'd made an ass of himself, again.
"So…" She paused, choking back hitch or a sob, before continuing, rushing the words out "So don't you dare tell me that I don't understand what you're going through. I get it. We all do. You're hurting. But you need to get over that and move on with your life, Hiccup."
He shook his head. "I'm not strong like you guys, Ruff."
She gave him a disbelieving look.
"Not strong? Hiccup, you're the strongest person I know. You're wimpy, and you're sometimes pathetic and you whine a lot but you are, bar none, the strongest person on Berk. If you can't do it … if you can't do it, no one can. There's no one else."
Hiccup was once again rendered speechless. In the face of such faith, what could he say? He had never really understood his ability to inspire loyalty in his rough, independent people. Yet they followed him. Trusted him when he could barely trust himself, most days. He could see it in her eyes, rock solid certainty. In him. He wished he could borrow some of it.
"I can't … I … I don't know how." Her face, previously set in a hard, angry mask now softened, and she took his hands in hers.
"It's not easy. Every day is a fight. Every morning, I expect to hear his snoring and see his stupid face. Whenever I get mad, I instinctively reach out and try to punch him. These things will happen. It takes time, effort and pain. But it must be done. Every day, you must fight it. Perhaps you can be happy again."
"I just … it's not like I haven't been trying, Ruff."
She shook her head. "You need to let her go, Hiccup. I don't care what you do with sparkly. Be with her, don't be, that's up to you. But you need to let Astrid go. You're only hurting yourself, and her too, from where she watches in Valhalla. She's going to beat you black and blue if you waste your life away, and so will I before I see you do that."
And wasn't that a sign that sometime, somewhere, he'd gone terribly wrong? When it was Ruffnut, of all people, giving him advice?
"You're right, Ruff."
"Damn straight I am."
"Thanks, I think."
"Don't mention it. What are friends for?"
He shook his head in exasperation, a small smile on his lips. It was good to have friends.
"You're still in trouble though."
She looked stricken. "What? Even after all my sagely wisdom?"
"Yes, even so."
"You're a cruel, ungrateful person, Hiccup Haddock."
"And you're grounded, Thorston."
She snorted in good humor and shook her head. "You should also probably know that I'll leave in a couple of days."
"I wouldn't be so sure of that. I got a message from the Queen's office, that she'd like to talk to us about a plan. Maybe it will require your presence for a little while longer."
"My presence? Huh. That should be interesting. In any case, are we done? Can I go? No offense, but I left a rather handsome, half-naked foreigner in the practice range when you summoned me."
Hiccup guffawed. "Yes, you can go."
"See ya."
She rose, heading for the door, and Hiccup turned back to his papers. Just at the door, Ruff paused, idly looking at him over her shoulder.
"And Hiccup?"
"Hm?"
"If you turn into the spineless coward from before the Understanding, or into that unfeeling person you were a few years ago, I'll kill you myself."
~H~
The rest of the evening passed without much of note. Ruffnut declined his invitation to join him and Toothless on their evening flight, citing other matters. No doubt these other matters were half-naked and sword-wielding, but Hiccup didn't mind. His flight that evening was relaxed and slow, unlike their usual death-defying stunts. Toothless, no doubt sensing his friend's pensive mood, glided across the tops of the red-stained clouds in wide, lazy circles. Giving Hiccup the peace necessary to think, as the sun dipped lower and lower.
He was joined later by the princess and Kristoff. The blond man informed him that he had contacted the trolls, and that Hiccup was welcome to visit. Anna then said that she had cleared tomorrow evening for the visit, and that it should not interfere with Hiccup's mission.
When asked 'What mission?' the princess had covered her mouth with her hands and blushed a furious red.
"I messed up," she had said "please don't tell Elsa. I guess she'll tell you later."
Hiccup agreed, and that was that. They spent the rest of their time together with Kristoff explaining how the trolls worked as a society, and providing anecdotes from his life with them while Anna mercilessly teased Ernie, who did his best to remain unaffected.
He spent some time before bed writing into his notebook. He hadn't done that in a while, which was a shame. He lingered in one of the early pages, where a full-body sketch of Astrid lay. He run his fingers over the sketch, wondering what he would do if he could speak to her again, just once.
Still, he spent some time writing his recent experiences down, along with sketches of interesting things he had seen around the castle. As was his wont, he got distracted as he sketched, barely looking at the paper while he allowed the relaxing motions to guide his thoughts.
When he refocused, some time later, and looked at his sketch again, he was only vaguely surprised to see a sketch of Elsa's smiling face looking up at him, next to some winch mechanism that he'd seen at the docks.
He closed the notebook with a sigh.
From outside the balcony, Toothless let out a mournful warble. Hiccup got up and walked over to his curled friend. He tripped on the broken door he'd abandoned on the balcony door, and would have fallen, but Toothless' tail caught him just in time.
He sat on the dragon's side with a smile, allowing his wing to close around him and engulf him in warmth.
"I'm sorry, bud. I'll fix the door sometime."
Toothless' reply was a dismissive growl. Hiccup chuckled.
"Yeah. Sorry. I know I haven't really been myself lately. I know I've ignored you a lot. I'm sorry for that, too."
Though he couldn't exactly decipher Toothless' growls, the gentle tip with his snout reeked of compassion. Looking at his best friend's gentle green eyes, Hiccup could never understand how they had ever believed dragons were mindless demons.
"It's this place, I think. This part of the world." Hiccup said. "It's like … like there is no time for dragons here. No place. Like the world is moving too fast for dragons."
On Toothless' irritated grunt, Hiccup shrugged. "It doesn't make much sense to me, either. It's just a thought. But mark my words, bud. We won't be staying for much longer. I just … I don't think there's a place here. For us, I mean."
It still amazed Hiccup how much he could derive from his friend's various noises. It wasn't a language. It was much more instinctual than that, but he could almost understand him. The worry in his tone was almost laughable. Hiccup rubbed his friend's underbelly soothingly.
"It's not just you, buddy. Don't be stupid. It's me, too. This place is beautiful but … we don't belong here. Either of us. I'm beginning to realize that."
Toothless' reply was to curl up around him further. Here, like this, all of Hiccup's worries and problems seemed less than silly. Here, he could relax and be himself, cut off from the rest of the world, but for Toothless.
Hiccup really did not want to get up. "Perhaps I will spend the night here. Thanks, bud."
The steady beat of Toothless' heart lulled Hiccup to a blissful sleep.
~H~
When Hiccup awoke, he felt more rested than he had in weeks. He blinked repeatedly, chasing the bleariness away. It took him a few seconds to realize that the incessant sound was a voice. It took him a few more to recognize it.
"Hiccup?" Repeated the voice he knew belonged to Ernie. "Are you … here somewhere?"
"Mmm what is it?"
"Oh. You are here. I … didn't realize."
Hiccup took stock of his surroundings. He had slept under Toothless' wing. Even though the marble balcony floor was hard, Toothless' paw and side provided enough comfort, and the heat in his belly enough warmth. He had slept like this for weeks on end when the two of them were traveling. Toothless made a very comfortable tent. Hiccup stretched and winced a little. Feather beds had spoiled him these last few weeks. Everything ached.
"Yeah. I'm up, I'm up."
Toothless obligingly raised his wing as he released a massive yawn, just waking up, himself. Hiccup held onto the tip of Toothless' tail and allowed the dragon to pull him to his feet, where he proceeded to pop his back to a series of satisfying cracks.
"That felt good." He noted. He looked at his aide. Ernie looked relieved, but also nervous. "Everything okay, Ernie?"
"It's just … when I came to wake you, you weren't in your bed. I assumed you woke up earlier. I didn't see you under Toothless' wing. You missed breakfast."
"Oh." Had he overslept? That was embarrassing. He hadn't overslept in a good while. "What time is it?"
"Almost noon."
Oh. Well, crap. He had really overslept. "Let me guess. I have to be somewhere, right?"
Ernie nodded. "You have a meeting with the Queen and the Lady Thorston soon."
Hiccup snorted. "Lady? Don't let her hear you say that."
"Why is that, Hiccup?"
"She's a Shieldmaiden, not a Lady, and she's prone to pointedly reminding people of the difference with sharp objects. Call her a lady in her face and you better be able to wield a sword."
"I … see." Perhaps it was his tone, but Hiccup followed his instincts and looked at Ernie. The young man had the faintest flush in his face. Hiccup grinned, wrapping an arm around Ernie's shoulders, who stiffened.
"Does itty bitty Ernie have a crush on big, bad Ruff, by any chance?"
The boy's furious blushing would have given him away, even if his stammering didn't.
"I … I don't know what you're talking about. And would you please remove your hand?"
Hiccup obliged, still grinning. "As you wish. But I'm warning you kid, Ruffnut would eat you alive."
"Perhaps … Then again, perhaps you underestimate me."
Hiccup's eyes widened. When he looked at Ernie again, the young man gave him a small smile, shaky but challenging. Ruff intimidated Vikings, never mind people like Ernie. The boy really had it in him, it seemed. He felt his respect for him rise a few notches.
That didn't stop him from laughing his ass off.
"It's not that funny." Ernie protested.
"It is plenty funny."
"Are you saying I couldn't do it?"
"That's exactly what I'm saying." Hiccup tried unsuccessfully to keep the laughter from his voice. "I'd hate to see what was left of you even if you did succeed. Besides, Ruff tends to like her men a little… taller."
"Well then, what would you suggest? Do you have any advice for me?" Said Ernie, determinedly ignoring Hiccup's jab.
Hiccup sobered up a little "Wait, are you serious? What about that … what was it, a maid?"
Ernie shook his head.
"You do know she'll be leaving in a few days, right?"
"Didn't seem to stop you."
Hiccup's eyes widened again at the implication of Ernie's words. Of course, he had no illusions that the boy hadn't known, but to come out and say it like that … wow. Ernie seemed to realize what he said, because he gasped, palm immediately flying to his mouth as if to snatch the words back.
"I didn't mean …. I'm sorry, my lord, it's none of my business—"
"Woah there, hold it. It's alright, relax." Ernie looked on the verge of an all out panic attack, Hiccup put a hand on his shoulder. "It's alright Ernie. You're a friend and I trust you. It's okay to talk about that if you want to."
He shook his head. "It really is none of my business. I just meant to say that, even if there is no promise for the future, perhaps a case can be made for the present."
Hiccup blinked, his response dying in his throat. What Ernie had said … it made an awful lot of sense, and he suddenly felt incredibly stupid. What was it lately, that he would receive insightful advice from the people he least expected?
He clapped Ernie on the back.
"I like your attitude. You're a born winner."
"You think so?"
"I know so. I'll see if I can get Ruffnut to tutor you on swordplay today. The rest is up to you."
"You'd do that for me?"
"Sure I would." Hiccup rather doubted Ernie's chances when his competition included the likes of Gregor, but hell, he had managed to win over Astrid. He had seen the impossible happen. Perhaps even twice. This was nothing.
"Well, uh, thank you." And that was the end of that conversation, though Hiccup couldn't shake away the smile on his face.
They found Ruffnut waiting for them outside of Elsa's office, thankfully in normal clothes rather than battle attire. He playfully shoved Ernie's shoulder, and received a blushing glare in return. Thankfully, Ruff didn't spare Ernie a glance.
"I was on time, and you're late? Must be Ragnarok."
"Very funny. Ernie, if you would?"
"Uh, right." Composing himself, Ernie stood up straighter, knocked on the Queen's door, and went in to announce them. Inside, waiting for them, were not only the Queen, but also the Commander General and several other men who wore uniforms similar to the General. Elsa was wearing a blue dress, along with a pair of long gloves. She smiled briefly upon seeing him, but things felt...official. Hiccup mentally put on his Chief helmet, before walking smartly into the room.
"Chief Haddock, Miss Thorston, welcome. Please, sit. We have much to discuss." The Queen greeted. Hiccup returned the greeting, and took a seat in front of Elsa's desk, as did Ruff.
"How can we be of service?"
"Commander General?" Elsa said, giving the man next to her the word.
"Thank you, my Queen. As it happens, Chief Haddock, we require your assistance in a plan we concocted, to lure out the people responsible for your attack."
"We're listening."
"As I don't think you're aware, we recently captured an infiltrator, who seems to affiliated with the people who came after you. After extensive interrogation, we have managed to extract some information out of him. We believe that we can use that information to form a trap, in the city of Varnas, a few hours' ride from Arendelle."
"What is your plan, then?"
Here, the man next to Mertok spoke. He was younger and more heavily built, with short, dark hair.
"Greetings, I am Protector Divisive Vren. As the general was saying, our plan is to stage a trap in a place where we are positive the enemy has enough of a presence to act immediately, without waiting for assistance from other clusters."
"You've uncovered the network, then?"
"We are beginning to. We believe we should act now, before our captive's absence forces a reshuffling of the enemy's forces."
"I see." Said Hiccup neutrally. "And why do you need us?"
"You, Chief Haddock, are the bait."
He blinked. Ruff opened her mouth, but he shot her a warning look and she closed it again. He rubbed his chin with his hand, thinking.
"I understand your thinking. Yes, it makes sense. If those people are after me, then I would be the best bait. However, I don't think they will attack in Toothless' presence, after what happened to their last attempt."
"That is correct." Vren said, nodding. "Which is why your dragons will remain here."
At this, Hiccup frowned. Elsa must have noticed it, because she hurried to explain.
"Of course, we are only asking for your help, not demanding it in any way. This is a favour asked by my government. Refusal will not affect our negotiations in the slightest."
Hiccup nodded. "But our presence is necessary for your ruse to work."
"That it is."Elsa acknowledged. "However, I'd have thought you would be eager to make a move against the people who ordered the hit on you."
"You would be right, in this case. Tell us more about your plan."
Vren picked up again. "You two will ride to Varnas. Some reason will be give for your presence, as well as the absence of the dragons. There, we will switch you with doubles wearing your armor, who will proceed to walk, with minimal guard, into the part of the city where we know the enemy has a strong presence. If all goes well, they will see it as an opportunity too good to ignore. Meanwhile, our agents are lying in wait around the city in civilian disguises, and will close around the enemies as soon as their trap is sprang."
"Why is our presence necessary if you already have believable doubles?"
"The change will be right before the expected time of attack. Any sooner, and the risk of discovery is too high. But do not fear, you will be in a safe place, well guarded."
"That is not my concern." Hiccup said, narrowing his eyes at the man. "Nor do I wish to hide while someone else risks his life in my stead."
"Regardless, Chief Haddock," the Commander General said, "we will not actually risk your life in an engagement. You will not be permitted near the site. If you decline to the switch, then I'm afraid we'll have to cancel the operation."
Hiccup examined the older man. His face was held in an expert expression of firm civility, whatever was going on behind it Hiccup couldn't guess. But he could tell the man wasn't prepared to negotiate on that point.
"You said your agents are already there? How did you organize this when you were not certain of our cooperation?"
Queen Elsa opened her mouth to say something, but thought better of it and refrained. She turned to look at her General. Mertok spoke.
"I arranged it, discreetly. The Queen did not yet know, but I felt it for the best."
Hiccup twined his fingers, resting his chin on them as he thought. If he declined, he would basically waste all the time and resources Arendelle put into making this whole operation possible, not to mention a perfectly good chance to get back at his attackers. It seemed perfect, but he still hesitated. Something held him back. Looking at the steadfast Commander General, he realized that it was this man and his sharp, calculating gaze.
"I suppose this whole operation is under your direct control, General Mertok?"
"That it is, Chief. Is that not to your satisfaction?"
Did Hiccup imagine the flash of challenge in the man's eyes?
"Of course it is." He answered mechanically.
Perhaps trying to diffuse the tension, Queen Elsa interjected. "So, do we have your cooperation?"
Hiccup took some time to think it over. "What do you think, Ruffnut?"
Ruffnut evidently had taken the time to phrase her feelings a little more diplomatically. She paused for a moment and said: "Sounds like a solid plan, though I'm wary of leaving Barf behind. If you really think I'll let someone else fight instead of me, you're mistaken."
Hiccup was almost proud of her.
"Miss Thorston," the Protector Divisive said, "we have already talked about this. If you refuse the switch, then—"
"I heard you the first time." She cut him off. "I still disagree."
"Miss Thorston—"
This time, Hiccup cut him off. "Yes, yes, we know. We'll play by your rules. When will the operation take place?"
"You ride tomorrow."
"I see. Can I expect the details in writing before then?"
"No, the information is confidential and too risky to be put to paper. You will be further briefed along the way. Is that acceptable?"
"It is. Will that be all?"
"Indeed."
"Then, if you'll excuse us."
Hiccup nodded in their general direction before rising, Ruffnut following in his stead. As he made to leave, the Queen also rose.
"Chief Haddock, a word?" He nodded, and the Queen followed them out into the hallway.
"Anna told me about your visit to the trolls. I wish I could go with you, but alas, time does not permit."
"Do not trouble yourself. We should not be gone long."
"Good to hear. Perhaps, when you return, we can spend some time together?"
On Ruff's suggestive grin, Elsa hurried to add "All of us, I mean."
"I have a better idea." Hiccup said. "I know that you and Anna have been wondering about what happened during a particular part of our engagement, the one where you saw me glide."
"I believe that you explained the mechanics behind your gliding to me before, Chief Hiccup. However, a demonstration would be more than welcome."
Hiccup smiled. "How about something even better?"
"I'm afraid I do not follow."
"How would you like to see a man fly, Queen Elsa?"
She raised a delicate eyebrow, and Hiccup had to fight down the urge to do something imprudent in the middle of a hallway.
"It sounds ridiculous, but I have learned not to discount ridiculous things when it comes to you, Chief Hiccup."
"Thanks, I think."
She let out a melodious laugh that did terrible things to his stomach.
"I will see you tonight, then. Give my regards to Grandpabbie."
"I will. Have a nice day."
"And you both."
They watched her walk off, until Ruffnut broke the silence.
"Are you really going to do that?"
"Yup."
She snorted. "Show off."
"If you've got it, show it."
"Hear hear."
"So, what do you really think?"
"That there's no way I'm letting some snot-nosed local impersonate me and fight while I'm twiddling my thumbs. Are you really going to agree to that?"
He scoffed. "Of course not, but we need them to think that I will, so that the plan can proceed."
She smirked, shoving his shoulder playfully. "You may not be as dumb as you look, after all."
"Speaking of dumb, what do you say about giving my buddy Ernie a few one-on-one sword tutoring sessions?"
"Excuse me?"
"You know, my friend. Funny, cute, honest, all around great guy." He said with an innocent grin.
"Are you setting me up with your assistant?"
"And if I am?"
"So you get to dance sideways with the Queen but all I get is a simple assistant?"
"Would you rather the Queen?"
"Not really my type but I'll be damned if those hips don't make me want to—"
"Oka~ay enough of that thought, thanks." Hiccup cut her off, fighting down a blush and failing.
Ruff let out a barking laugh. "Did ickle Hiccup bite off more than he could chew, perhaps?"
"Let's return back to the matter of Ernie, yeah?"
"Dunno. I guess he's cute but isn't he, like, thirteen?"
"He's actually almost seventeen."
She tilted her head in consideration, before shooting him a wicked grin. "Huh. He looks kind of younger. No problem then, I'm sure I can teach the boy a thing or two. Maybe even three, if he's a fast learner."
"Just remember that we'll be leaving soon."
"What? Afraid that big bad Ruff will be too rough with your little friend?"
"No, not exactly. He's still just a kid, so play nice."
"He's a delicious piece of fresh man-meat, is what he is." She said dismissively. "Besides, you brought him to my attention. On your head be it."
"Ruff, I'm serious. Be good."
She let out a dramatic sigh. "Fine, no corrupting the innocent youth. You always ruin my fun."
"Perhaps you could limit yourself to actually teaching him the sword?"
She snorted. "You keep telling yourself that."
~H~
The evening of that same day, he met Anna and Kristoff in the Courtyard, wearing his leather riding clothes and a cloak, though he did not take the harness. Toothless would stay behind with Barf, seeing as the trolls were in a nearby forest. Ruffnut had also begged off, informing him with glee that she would be having her first tutoring session with Ernie while he was away. He rather feared for his aide, but he had asked for this and youths should be allowed to make their own mistakes in order to learn.
Ernie would probably be one big bruise tomorrow. Hiccup only prayed that Ruff had the good sense to start with wooden swords.
Presented with a horse, Hiccup was reminded of his weird distaste for the animals. It really wasn't their fault, gods knew the poor beasts tried their best, and had their own brand of intelligence. However, most people would parallelize them with dragons and while Hiccup could see how that would make sense superficially, it couldn't be further from the truth than comparing a frog to a dog.
Not to mention, he never really got the hang of riding one of the damn things.
It took some time to get him properly settled on the saddle, to his embarrassment. Interestingly, Kristoff actually rode on his reindeer, Sven. Hiccup supposed that he wasn't one to talk about weird mounts, but it still left an impression on him.
The ride was, to him at least, entirely uncomfortable and much too long, although he knew that it couldn't have been more than three hours since they left the palace that they entered a shadowed forest. Hiccup had to admit it was interesting travelling so slowly through the silent forest. His usual method of transportation had him gliding high above the treetops, the forest spread out beneath like an endless ocean. To his own private amusement, being carried beneath the great fir trees had become a rather unfamiliar perspective for him.
The path that Kristoff led them through was tricky, and often followed no path at all. Hiccup was rather lost by the time they arrived in a big clearing, one rife with weird round stones and a lot of moss.
They stopped, tying the two horses just out of the clearing while Kristoff and Sven moved to the center.
"Hey guys," the ice-master greeted the thin air, "I'm back, and I brought a friend I want you to meet."
Who was Kristoff talking to … exactly? The stones? Someone he couldn't see?
As he and Anna also walked to where Kristoff was, he leaned closer and whispered.
"Where are the trolls?"
Rather than reply, Anna suddenly grabbed his arm and pulled him back, mid-stride.
"What—"
"Don't step on them." She scolded him. "That's rude."
Hiccup looked down and saw that he had been about to step his prosthetic on one of the spheres. He ignored the fact that he would have probably fallen. "That's a troll?"
He was almost braced for the squeaky voice that answered. Almost.
"Well I never! Young man, I'll have you know that I'm as troll as one can be." The stone … was no longer a stone. Rather, it had turned into a short, somewhat hairy, and decidedly round being with pudgy, female features.
Hiccup's mind had emptied in shock, but after a moment he pulled himself together and offered the troll-lady an apologetic smile.
"My apologies. I meant no offense, madame troll." He breathed a sigh of relief when his assessment of her gender seemed to be correct and she beamed at him.
"Aaw, such a polite young man. You're forgiven, darling."
More and more stones turned into the same pudgy creatures, the tallest barely reaching his waist. They crowded around him, Anna and Kristoff, talking at the same time and over each other, offering greetings, compliments and questions. Hiccup was rather overwhelmed, not knowing what to do and unable to answer any one troll.
"Oy, give the boy some room, would you?" He heard an elderly voice call out, and immediately the trolls stopped crowding him and moved back, though not without some grumbling.
Hiccup located the troll that had spoken. He was decidedly male, and looked older than the rest of the trolls. At the very least, he looked craggier. He also had some superficial accessories, something the other trolls lacked. Hiccup took a wild guess.
"You must be Grandpabbie. It is an honor to meet you." He said, bowing deeply. Hiccup would like to think that he was a good judge of character, and something told him that this troll was particularly worthy of respect.
He noticed Kristoff, Anna and the rest of the trolls move deeper into the woods, already engrossed in various topics, no doubt giving him and the elder space and privacy.
The old troll grinned at him, his face transforming into a maze of cracks and wrinkles. "You are indeed as smart as I have heard, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock."
"You know of me, wise one?"
"Please, child, call me Grandpabbie or simply Pabbie. I already feel old." He indicated a couple of presumably actual rocks nearby and they both sat down.
"As you wish, Grandpabbie."
"Yes, I have heard of you. The wind has carried tales of your deeds even to our lands. Words of bravery, of sacrifice, but also of danger."
Hiccup hesitated, unsure. "I'm afraid I don't understand, elder."
"Your actions have earned you much respect, friend of dragons. You are often discussed, in certain circles."
"I … do my best to help as many as I can."
"Aye, child, of that I have no doubt. Yet a warning I carry, for you."
Hiccup leaned forward, so as to be almost on the same level as the elder troll. It didn't take a genius to guess that warnings from a being such as Grandabbie were to be taken with utmost seriousness.
"Please, tell me."
"Many view you with wariness, friend of dragons. They wonder, when will your campaign end?"
Hiccup lamented the fact that asking him about socks, at this point, would be really inappropriate.
"I seek only to end the war in all the provinces of the archipelago, Grandpabbie."
"Aye, I know, you seek only to protect. Commendable, no doubt. However, you are teetering on a delicate edge. When does protection become control? At which point does safety mean oppression?"
Despite himself, Hiccup frowned. "I would never oppress my people or anyone else, elder."
The troll gave him a penetrating gaze. Hiccup had locked gazes with many people and things before, and never had he felt like he could hide nothing from his beholder.
Grandpabbie shook his head. "Be careful, young one. Unless you are, you run the risk of becoming the very thing you fought so hard to destroy."
Hiccup's mind helpfully provided an image of the Red Death, huge and monstrous, unleashing a torrent of hellfire on the Viking ships. He shook his head.
"No. Not that. Never that."
"You must tread carefully, friend of dragons. Your destiny is one of greatness, but it is not yet certain to which side the scales will tip."
"I will, elder. Thank you for your warning." He went to stand, before a knobbled walking stick pressed him gently back down onto his rock.
"There is … one more thing that troubles you. Speak to me, Hiccup. You believe I can be of further assistance, do you not?"
"If you know that, elder, then you already know the matter that troubles me."
The troll laughed. "Smart, friend of dragons, smart. Indeed, I am aware of what burdens your heart." The troll moved his hands, and the light obeyed him, folding into images. The first one was made of silhouettes, ones that were painfully recognizable to Hiccup.
"You are weighed by the memory of loving wife. Part of you still has not let her go. You are holding back, hesitating in living beyond survival and responsibility." The image changed, to one of two people a little further apart, in different stances, but still recognizable. "At the same time, another part of you has found love again. Yet, both parts cannot coexist. You are tearing your heart apart with this self-doubt, friend of dragons. It is not meant for such tugging."
Hiccup knew this. He knew he had to figure it out. "Tell me what I should do, Grandpabbie. Please."
The troll shook his head. "I'm sorry, young one. The matters of the heart are delicate and unique to each person. This is not an ailment with which I can aid."
"Please." Hiccup tried again. "There must be some advice that you can give me."
The troll's look was one of compassion as it reached up and clapped his shoulder. "Only the simplest, oldest, and yet most effective of advice."
"What is it?"
"Follow your heart, young one. Follow your heart."
Well, that was just unhelpful.
~H~