On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love sent to me…

Five Golden Knuckles

John was worried about Carter. She had called asking him, about an hour ago, to meet her right here, at the gym Finch purchased for he and Shaw to work out in, so they could be themselves without needing a cover. But what concerned him wasn't Carter asking him to come here to meet with her but the unusual tone to her voice. Joss sounded angry, yes, but there was something else underneath the anger that had left him feeling puzzled. He was used to her being angry, usually at him for doing one illegal thing or another, but he hadn't done anything, at least nothing he was aware of, and this was different…he couldn't put his finger on it but she sounded off. So instead of heading for dinner with Finch, Shaw, and Root he had gone to get a quick bite to eat at a fast food joint and came here as he ate.

He was currently ramming his fists repeatedly into the punching bag while he waited for her to arrive in anxiousness. After Carter had guessed about the machine and he convinced Finch to explain the truth to her they had extended the invitation to come to their own private gym to her as a perk. Carter used it from time to time whenever her schedule permitted it. She almost always used the weight room or treadmill so her asking to meet in the training room might offer a clue as to what was wrong but he wasn't sure what the clue meant.

John felt a presence and he knew it was her without even needing to look. Her familiar Jasmin scent clung to her; he would never admit to taking a moment every time they were together to just inhale her feminine beautiful scent.

He stopped pummeling the punching bag to turn to eye her and frowned. Something was definitely wrong. There was some emotion swimming in her eyes. He noted she had taped her hands as she approached him on the wall to wall blue mat. John didn't comment as he merely watched her. She was wearing tight black yoga pants and a hot pink Nike sports bra. Her scar was displayed but so was her delectable belly button that always managed to ensnare his attention whenever they worked out together.

"I want to spar like you and Shaw do," she stated without emotion as she stretched to loosen up.

John didn't respond at first. Carter had watched him and Shaw from time to time as they sparred after she finished a rigorous run on the treadmill. "Alright Carter," he agreed slowly. He would just have to make sure he pulled his punches unlike what he did with Shaw. Hurting this woman even accidentally would pain him in unexplainable ways.

They moved away from the slightly swinging punching bag to the middle of the mat. He stood watching her quietly.

"What are you waiting for?" she snapped.

John cocked a brow at the hostility in her voice. "I'm waiting for you to be ready," he explained.

"I am," she assured brusquely. He didn't call her the liar that she was so he simply stood still and waited which seemed to be the right call as she looked downright pissed off and lunged at him first. She went for a jab that he blocked easily and got into his stance.

Carter went straight for a full force kick that he blocked and shoved her backwards. His reflexes were quick but she wasn't much of a challenge as she wasn't using technique. Carter had basic training in the Army and he knew she knew self-defense but right about now if you didn't know that about her you'd think she had no training whatsoever. He could easily pin her to the ground right now but he didn't. Carter wanted to use this as a way to exorcise something bothering her and who was he to judge. But he wasn't going to make it easy for her either. So he went on the attack.

Joss felt everything else melt away as she tried blocking, deflecting, and defending as best as she could everything John gave her but he was overwhelming; she knew he was pulling his punches to not hurt her and half of her was grateful while the other half wasn't. But she didn't have time to be pissed because he was connecting jab after jab before he grabbed her arm and lifted her up and over his back. She landed on the mat with a loud thud and she grunted in irritation.

John stood beside her and peered down at her as she was breathing heavy as she glared up at him. "Now get up and fight me like you can or tuck your tail between your legs and leave Carter," he ordered. If she wanted to be angry then he'd give her something to be angry about.

Fury burned in her as she swept her leg out, slamming it hard into his ankles to trip him and succeeded. She scrambled up before he did. "Is you-falling-on-your-ass-fighting more like I can or do I need to kick your ass to impress you?" she snarled.

He got up, looking like he was half smiling at her, and she threw a punch full force and he blocked it. "It's better. But you're still fighting like you never fought before," he commented.

She tried a right hook, then a jab which were deflected easily.

"Is that all you have, Carter!" he taunted.

Joss changed her attack methods varying them trying to surprise him; she went from short jabs to hooks, to various kicks mixed in, back to a haymaker. She felt rewarded when one of the several she threw would actually connect, earning her a small grunt from him, but otherwise he defended them all.

Sweat dripped down from her forehead, her muscles felt on fire, and she drew in breath through her nostrils. Joss swung out her left fist in a poorly timed manner as she was fatigued; which he easily caught, jabbed her stomach hard, before flipping her right back onto the mat. She exhaled roughly as she beat her fists on the mat in anger.

Joss remained on the mat breathing fast as John hovered over her barely breathing hard. He didn't say a word as he slowly lowered himself to the mat and sat beside her. "Want to tell me what's wrong?"

She sat up, still breathing raggedly. "What makes you think there is something wrong?" she asked, deflecting. She much preferred getting her ass kicked right about now then think about earlier.

"Your lack of technique says so," he murmured.

Joss looked at her hands as she breathed slower. "I worked a murder suicide. He killed his wife and four of his kids, only one survived because they played dead," she whispered.

"I'm sorry…."

She kept her gaze down as the tears welled up in her eyes. "The youngest was eight months old and the oldest was ten. The lone survivor was six, with two wounds that were grazes; one on her head and the other on her leg. She was still pretending to be dead even when paramedics arrived. Apparently from what we could gather Mr. and Mrs. Miller had a fight about him wasting their Christmas money they were saving on booze which made him snap," she said softly before looking at him as a tear slid down her cheek. "He shot his kids multiple times; over and over again just to hurt Eileen Miller before he shot her dead and then himself all over money."

"I'm so sorry Carter," he whispered, hesitantly sliding an arm on her shoulders unsure of its welcome. And when she didn't move he kept it resting there in silent comfort.

She swiped away at the tears. "You'd think I'd toughen up. I've seen these things before. I hate them because I can't bring anyone to justice since he killed himself."

"Joss, you are the strongest woman I know; showing emotion for the fallen children isn't showing weakness. You're a mother and then a detective."

When she looked at him with watery brown eyes he wished he could help her forget the sight she saw but couldn't. The fact that the machine didn't give them their numbers meant it was a crime committed in the heat of the moment so it wasn't planned.

"Thank you for letting me try to take my anger out on you," she managed through the lump in her throat. Even though she got her ass kicked the fact that he took her mind off of what she saw today was exactly what she needed.

He smiled. "Anytime, Carter..."

They sat staring at each other for far too long before her gaze dropped to his mouth and John cleared his throat and removed his arm. He stood up and held a hand out to help her up, which she took rather slowly. They didn't speak as they walked side by side out of the training room to head to their respective locker room. John used getting dressed as a respite from the swirling tension between him and Carter. Something changed between them in there; it felt like when they were locked in the morgue together when he had kissed her.

He exited the locker room dressed and ready to leave. He only had to wait another five minutes before Carter appeared changed and ready to go. As they exited the gym that looked deceptively decrepit from the outside; snow had begun to fall. On the corner of the street was a quartet of carolers belting out a Christmas tune to passersby.

John walked Carter to her car that was parked near his.

She stopped in front of her car door to look up at him. "I'll be seeing you, John," she said softly before resting her hands on his shoulders, lifting up on her tiptoes and pressed a long kiss to his cheek. He closed his eyes at the feel of her soft lips against his cheek. When she pulled back he snapped his eyes open. "You being here for me means a lot." she whispered as she stared into his eyes.

"I'll always be here for you, Carter," he assured her before breaking the eye contact as he moved to let her climb into her car. After a moment she did and he closed her door for her and escaped to his own car and when he sat down inside it, he leaned his head back and exhaled.

John waited until Joss drove off to do so himself, all the while thinking about the certain gorgeous detective.

AN: I give every first responder all the credit in the world because I would never be able to do any of their jobs. I can barely muster up enough courage to watch a news story about an animal getting hurt let allow see things like they do daily.

Thanks for reading!