Author's Note: Oh my gosh! It has been about a week since I published the first chapter and I have 3 followers, 60 reads and dragoscilvio has favourited (that is now a word in my dictionary) my story! (Btw I really love your 'Heart of a Lion' story and have for a really long time) Anyway, thank you to everyone! Seeing my first read and follower has been one of the greatest moments of my life! And now, just under a week later, Chapter 2 is here! I also have a cover planned, but I don't think I'll add that until I finish the story. That is, unless, you would like me to put it up earlier.
Anyway, on with the story!
Lance could barely feel anything.
He couldn't feel his back scalding from the burning water, nor the tickling sensation of water drops sliding down his lean legs. His mind was not present in the safety of his room, but rather it was still stuck with Pidge. She had been immediately changed into a cryo-suit and placed in the healing pod. She had hissed and groaned every time a movement jostled her chest, which was blossoming with painful bruises, varying from dark shades of purple and indigo, to black. Had the pattern been on a different canvas, Lance may have liked it, but these markings were on Pidge's body, and it was because of him that they were there.
According to Coran…
"The healing pod should have her healed by tomorrow morning." Coran smiled at Shiro, prompting the black paladin to deflate with a huge sigh of relief. Hunk, too, exhaled and finally allowed a smile to widen on his face.
"Thank goodness." He said. "I was almost afraid that she had been severely crushed!"
Lance also wanted to sigh, but his body was still petrified by the view of Pidge's limp body sleeping in the pod; not even the heat from Keith's glare could melt him. Her face was relaxed-more so than it had been recently-and the bags beneath her eyes were ashen, almost dark grey. It was nice to see her finally taking it easy for once, but Lance desperately wished that it could have been under other circumstances. Guilt swirled within his stomach and his heart felt heavy. He would have stood there forever if Keith hadn't suddenly turned to him.
"What the quiznack was that back there!?" He demanded.
Disturbed by the sudden outburst, Lance jumped and flipped his head to face the red paladin. Keith was furious! His eyes were sharper than his blade and his face glowed a bright red. At another time, Lance would have started singing about Rudolph and Keith's face would have changed from anger to confusion.
But that Lance wasn't here. That Lance was annoyingly cheerful and charming, with an abundance of confidence and wit. This Lance was void of everything but sadness, guilt and fear.
Because Keith was right.
Keith was always right.
"You were in a perfectly good location to see that Galra coming, you had a clear shot, YOU COULDN'T HAVE MISSED IT!" Keith was full-on yelling now. Hunk was shrinking and Shiro looked ready to stop Keith but he continued: "Now, thanks to you Pidge is hurt! We got lucky this time; next time she could be killed! Or Hunk, or Shiro!"
Tears welled up in Lance's eyes, but he had just enough will left to suppress them.
"K-Keith, I-" Lance began to stammer, but Keith's reprimand was well beyond the point or return.
"No Lance! I don't want to hear your excuses! You go on and on about how you're an amazing sharpshooter, but you never live up to your boasting! Why do you have to be so useless!?"
Everyone gasped as soon as the words left Keith's mouth. Even Keith seemed shocked at his own words, and immediately deflated, curling in on himself. His eyes widened and his face rapidly paled. Lance, however, appeared to be unaffected on the outside. Inside, he felt like a million arrows had pierced his body all at once. His heart hurt the most though, as if someone had stabbed a knife into his chest and cruelly twisted it.
"Lance… I-I'm so sorry! I-"
"No, no." Lance said. "You're right. Pidge got hurt because I didn't shoot that Galra, and someone could die if I hesitate again. You were right to call me out on it Keith."
Lance was able to force a small, gentle smile on his face, but it required all of his strength to keep it from wavering. Without waiting for a reply, Lance turned and swiftly left the room. No one called for him to come back.
As soon as the door shut behind him, Lance could hear Shiro's voice, but it was too muffled for him to make out the words. Instead of waiting around, he returned to his room with the hope that no one would disturb him for a while. Lance wanted to be alone right now, because he was sure that the haunted look on his face would send shivers down everyone's spines.
Haunted; just another word for anguished or troubled.
Yes, Lance thought. I am definitely haunted.
Ever now, Lance can still see Pidge. He could how the agony caused her face to scrunch and her eyes to leak tears. Her screams of pain and the cracking sound from her chest echo within his mind. The bruises on her skin looked so wrong against her pale complexion. Even her relaxed face was odd since she always had a look of concentration. Whether she was on the computer, or in training, or flying Green, her focus would be on something. Lance thought that arriving in Space would have eased her mind a bit since she was one step closer to finding her family; instead, it did the opposite. Pidge was so determined to find Matt. She would stay up late for nights on end, scanning through thousands of lines of data in hope that something about her family would come up.
Despite how much Lance hated seeing Pidge push herself so extremely, he couldn't say anything because he would be doing the same if it was one of his younger siblings. He had tried to be there for Pidge though. Whenever she had a nightmare, Lance would hold her and rock her gently and let her talk about her brother. Sometimes, in return, Lance would tell her one of the many tales he had about his own family. He even comforted her when she was on a period. He'd bring her some heated bags and water bottles to ease her cramps, and he'd rush to and from the kitchen to bring her food and drinks while she stayed in bed with her laptop (having four younger sisters can make a guy very understanding). Most of all though, Lance had promised Pidge that they would find her family, that they would work together and for as many hours as it would take.
Family…
He missed his family.
Heck, anyone would miss their family. Even a Galra would-
…
That Galra soldier must have had family as well. Maybe a wife, maybe a child, maybe some siblings. They must have had parents and friends at the very least! Despite everything, that Galra soldier must have had people who would miss him, people who have been left behind because… Lance had killed him. He'd shot him cleanly through the head, and the Galra fell, like a tree chopped by a lumberjack.
Lance could see him now. His stone-dead corpse laying on the ground, eyes drained of their life and limbs completely limp. Lance could recall the blood as it crawled across the floor and slithered down the wall. He could see the blood now pulling its way towards him now, up his legs and chest, latching onto his face to drown him in his sins! He could see it on his hands…
His hands!
Lance could see the blood on his hands and it wouldn't come off! Lance yelped and began scrubbing furiously at his hands beneath the shower water. He then grabbed his flannel and rubbed his hands so hard that blood was now coming out of his hands as well!
"Go away!" Lance whimpered. "Just go away!"
But no matter how hard Lance tried to get rid of the stains, they just would not leave him! The blood would taint him forever.
Mama won't want me back! Lance realised, dread filling him up as quickly as tears filled his eyes. The others won't want me to stay! Will my siblings even recognise me with all of this blood?
"POR FAVOR, SOLO DÉJAME EN PAZ!" Lance begged. He collapsed onto the flooded floor of his shower as water continue to cascade down his back. Lance curled up, knees held tightly by his arms and tucked beneath his face. Lance sobbed uncontrollably, and began to rock slightly.
"Por favor… por favor, solo déjame en paz."
But nobody came, and the agonised cries continues to echo throughout his broken mind.
As soon as Lance was gone, Shiro turned to Keith with a disappointed grimace.
"That was too far Keith!" Shiro said.
Keith turned to Shiro, his eyes shining with horror and tears.
"I-I know!" Keith stammered. "I just-I didn't mean it that way! I just want him to take things seriously!"
"Lance does take things seriously Keith!" Hunk insisted. "He certainly takes our safety seriously!"
"How can you say that after he ditched you last week!?" Keith demanded.
"Hey, I was the one who asked Lance to grab the fruit!"
"But he should have insisted that your safety was more important! And what about when we're on missions!? He's always making stupid jokes and clowning around! I just don't understand him!"
"That's just how the blue paladin is Keith." Allura explained gently. Everyone turned to her. No one knew the traits of the blue paladin because Lance had so rudely interrupted her. Seeing that everyone was paying incredibly close attention to her, Allura continued: "The blue paladin is fun and witty. He is able to remain calm and cool in the face of danger, and keeps the other paladins from completely succumbing to their own traits and flaws. But most of all, the blue paladin is loyal, and will value his team and family above all else. He helps to support Voltron, not just as a robot, but also as a collective mind and soul. You could say that he is the very heart of Voltron! Without him, we...just wouldn't be able to properly function."
Everyone was silent. None of them had actually stopped to think about just how important Lance was to them.
Because he was!
He was always there for them, through nightmares and tears and anxiety attacks. Lance would be there to pull them back up when they had fallen, and support them when they felt weak. Lance was more than just their leg; he was their heart. Their warm and gentle and oh-so-loving heart! Without him, they just weren't a proper family!
"We need to fix this." Shiro said eventually. "I say we all get changed first. Have some showers, eat some food. I'll go see Lance after he's had some time to calm down, and we'll go from there."
"Yes Shiro." Everyone agreed.
Once everyone had dispersed, Shiro closed his eyes and prayed desperately for Lance to be alright.
Author's Note: Will Lance be alright? Well, since this is Langst, probably not, but I will make everything better for our beloved blue paladin!
Anyway, see you all in the next chapter!
POR FAVOR, SOLO DÉJAME EN PAZ! - PLEASE, JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!
EDIT: Grammar mistakes have been fixed. Inform me if you find any more.