"You have no idea what a disaster you have caused. " He spoke softly in Russian as he grabbed Natasha and paced in in a carrier. He grabbed a cab. This was an unusual extravagance, but if he was going to April's apartment he didn't want to arrive too late. He quickly dropped Natasha at his apartment, and returned to the cab.
He arrived at the apartment building Mark had written on the piece of paper.
The front desk rang her apartment.
April was fuming. She knew in the end she wouldn't be liable for the dresses. Still Mr. Givenchy had been grateful, and had offered her one of the dresses. Now they were ruined, and she'd grovel to him. She knew what a favor and risk it was for him to place her last minute on the runway for one of the most important shows of the season. Luckily she easily passed, and it had been hugely successful.
She changed and then headed to the kitchen. She wasn't a big drinker, except in the line of duty. Tonight she was willing to make an exception She was just sitting down when her phone rang. She considered not answering it, but grabbed the receiver anyway.
"Miss, there's an Illya Karanaka to see you. "
She heard Illya correct him through the phone. "Kuryakin " He sounded annoyed.
April would have fallen down if she weren't already sitting. "Blond guy with an accent. " She asked, though who else could it be. There were very few Illyas in New York. Thank God she thought as the anger returned.
"Yes, Miss." Jimmy answered.
"Send him up. "April answered. She did have to admit he had guts, if not much sense. This should be rich she thought as she waited for him to arrive.
There was a knock at the door and she went to open it. There he stood looking pathetic holding the four mangled dresses. She had been mad actually furious earlier. Now, her first inclination was to laugh. She looked him up and down without saying anything. She kept him waiting outside, even though she knew it was slightly rude. He squirmed slightly under her gaze. She couldn't remember ever seeing him squir ever.
"This is an unexpected surprise Mr Kuryakin. "
"Yes, I hope that I am not disturbing you." Illya mumbled to the floor.
She smiled slightly when he couldn't see her. She moved aside indicating he should enter.
"Please. " She motioned Illya into the living room. She went and sat on the couch. Illya stood looking as uncomfortable as she had ever seen him.
So, I'd ask why you're here, but that seems obvious " She gestured toward the dresses. "If you're here to return them, it's a bit late. "
She gazed at him evenly. She never thought she'd see the day when Illya Kuryakin would ever squirm under anyone's gaze. That is exactly what he was doing. She was secretly a bit pleased with herself. As Mark knew, she had a slight mercenary streak in her.
Illya paused unsure of himself. "I am here to say I will accept full responsibility for the dresses. Any cost and any apologies will of course be my responsibility."
She stared at him silently and motioned for the dresses. He handed them to her waiting for her reaction.
"Is that the only reason you're here? " She stared straight at him. He owed her an apology for the insults he flung at her earlier. She was wondering if he didn't realize that was worse than the dresses. She had believed he respected her. She had heard a few of the compliments he offered of her when he didn't know she was there. Apparently she was wrong to think that.
Illya sighed. "I am also here to apologize for insulting you. It was completely inappropriate, and I was completely wrong. I should never have talked to you in such a manner. You are clearly not a wench, though I am clearly an ass."
April gaped at him for a second. Then she broke into laughter. The image of a literal ass was stuck in her mind.
Illya looked at her as if she lost her mind.
She gained control of herself. She looked directly at him. Very seriously in Russian she asked him."Which end of the ass would you be Mr Kuryakin, the front or the rear? "
He gaped at her unable to answer. He never could have ever imagined this visit going this way in his wildest imagination.. Apparently she had a vicious sense of humor when angry. He was too shocked to judge whether this was good or bad.
April continued laughing as she took in Illya's face. Illya stared a moment more then he started shaking as he broke into laughter. The entire situation was suddenly absurd.
She rose and placed a hand on his shoulder "I'm sorry. That's not fair. I shouldn't.. ."
He shook his head, and placed a hand gently on her. "Thank you. I was not expecting to laugh at this situation. "
She nodded. She decided to clear the air. Humor was better than anger for either of them. "Please sit. " She motioned to the couch. "What can I get you to drink? Vodka or is it just a rumor Russian men can hold their drink?" She teased.
"It is not a rumor. " He smirked. "Yes, that would be excellent if you have any. "
She brought the bottle and shot glass to the table.
Illya looked surprised. "You have superb taste." He complimented her.
April shook her head. "My brother for when he comes to visit. " She explained.
Illya nodded. "Then please compliment your brother when you next see him."
She laughed easily. " Davie will be glad to know a Russian approves. Clearly there can be no higher praise for vodka than Russian approval. "
"Of course, this is known. We, Russians are experts in vodka. " He stated proudly.
She smiled. "Would the Poles agree? " There was a long standing dispute, who first developed vodka the Poles or the Russians. Illya rose to the bait just as she hoped he would.
"It is a well known fact that Russia was the first to develop the technique for distilling vodka. "
She was laughing softly. Illya just shook his head as he realized what she'd done. He smiled at her. "This is an argument for another time. I am here to apologize for my inexcusable behavior earlier. If it is any comfort, Napoleon made it clear with his punch. "
"He didn't need to do that. I'm sorry Illya. " She sounded disturbed.
He waved her comment away. "There is no harm, and I will remember my manners in the future. "
She smiled. Illya was starting to come out of his shell around her and Mark.
"Let's figure what to do about these dresses. " April moved the conversation along.
Illya gazed at her. " It is my responsibility. I will pay for everything, and will apologize to Mr. Givenchy for the damage done. "
April shook her head. "We'll both face the consequences. I was responsible for the dresses. "
Illya objected "You were not responsible for Natasha. That was my responsibility. "
She shook her head. "We'll both go together tomorrow. Maybe I can convince him to let me model some dresses for him gratis. He liked how I wore the dresses on the runway. Maybe there is a way to save your bank account. "
Illya shook his head. "I greatly appreciate the consideration, but the responsibility is entirely mine..."
April interrupted. She knew where this was going. "Trust me I don't mind. That was rather the best part of the assignment. Where else would I get to wear such dresses down the runway? "
Illya smiled. "You did the dresses justice, and make a superb runway model. " Illya offered as if it was obvious.
"I'll offer myself as the sacrifice for the greater good of UNCLE, and so Natasha may live. " April stated dramatically.
Illya laughed. He never expected to engage in silly banter, but was relieved she'd forgiven him. He bowed in her direction. "Natasha and I are humbled by your sacrifice. "
Illya left April's apartment greatly relieved. His bank account would likely feel those dresses dearly, but April had been gracious. Though he knew he would regret the financial consequences the whole affair turned out far better than he imagined. Overall he was actually pleased with the whole outcome. Though he'd never admit it, he hoped Mr Givenchy would agree with April's idea. He sincerely meant every word. She looked fabulous in his dresses, and gave an outstanding runway performance.
Little did Illya know his wish was about to come true, but with a slight twist.
Givenchy would have been furious if it were not for the fact that he immediately had one of his seamstresses make several copies of the pattern in several colors. He had a copy in red and many more colors.
April and Illya walked into Mr Waverly's office to provide a united front. Mr Waverly was there with Mr Givenchy discussing options concerning the torn dresses. Mr Givenchy had an ulterior motive.. His photographer caught Illya and April and immortalized the moment Mr Givenchy saw. April and Illya were radiant dancing together. They were the best advertising Givenchy could have for the dresses. Though the dresses were not a great loss, Givenchy intended to use them as leverage to get both Illya and April to model his clothes for him.
Mr Waverly had obviously objected at first. The idea that a secret agent should actually be secret was a concern. However, Givenchy was able to show Mr Waverly altered photos that gave the effect of two young people, who appeared very intimate without revealing their identity. If anything obscuring the two agents added to the mystery and appeal of the advertisement. Mr Givenchy even promised UNCLE could approve and modify photos as required.
Mr Waverly laughed. He could see no flaw in this plan. It maintained good will with Givenchy which might someday be useful. He had no doubt April would willingly agree. He agreed with Givenchy, she was a natural. Givenchy was pleased to be able to use April again.
The only complication they both saw in the plan was Illya Kuryakin. The photographer had caught the two unaware in what Mr Waverly agreed was an astounding and intimate scene. They looked at each other as though there was no one else in the universe. Mr Waverly suspected getting such a picture would be impossible to replicate knowing his agent as he did. He warned Mr Givenchy of this, but he seemed unconcerned.
"Something tells me that your agent will be able to get some excellent results from him. I have faith Mr Waverly.
Waverly chuckled. "If anyone could, it would be Ms Dancer. "
Illya and April entered to find Mr Waverly and Givenchy in deep discussion. They sat at the table waiting to be acknowledged.
The men turned to them. "Ah, my dresses. " Mr Givenchy took them, and checked them very thoroughly. They were not exaggerating the damage was extensive.
"I am to understand that your cat is responsible for this, Mr Kuryakin? "
Illya looked directly at him."Yes, I am responsible. Please do not blame April. It is my fault, and mine alone. "
April was about to speak, but Givenchy motioned for silence. "It is noble that you offer to share responsibility Ms Dancer. But it is clearly the cat responsible for this? " He questioned her.
She nodded knowing she was not succeeding in sparing Illya some of the blame. Before either could speak Mr Waverly interrupted. "Mr Givenchy has arrived at a most creative solution if you are willing. Mr Givenchy, would like you two to model some of his clothing. Specifically you Ms Dancer, if you are willing. "
April smiled. " I would love to just as long as Mr Waverly approves. I greatly enjoyed it. "
Givenchy smiled. "It will be a pleasure to have you if only for a while. "
"Now you Mr Kuryakin. .."
Before he could finish Illya interrupted seeing where this was going. " Mr Givenchy, I am uncertain how I may help. I have no modeling experience. I agree April is a natural model. I can not claim as much. "
Mr Givenchy and Mr Waverly both shook their heads. "You have no faith young man. I would not request your presence if I doubted you. I have proof of your abilities here. You compliment each other" He placed the photograph of the two of them dancing on the table.
Both, April and Illya goggled for a moment. April recovered first. "You have a superb photographer Mr Givenchy. Mr Waverly you approve this? "
She saw where Givenchy was going with this. Some photos for the cost of those dresses was a very good deal especially for Illya. She agreed almost immediately, then she saw Illya's face.
"Illya? " April asked uncertainty.
Illya was stunned. He remembered that evening. He had been enchanted by her in that dress. Playing her adoring companion was easy. He had trouble keeping his eyes from her, so he really didn't try too hard to act. The photo captured everything about that evening. They wanted him to replicate something indefinable, a moment in time that the photographer somehow caught.
"Mr Givenchy.." Illya sputtered. " I do not know how to create such a picture. I was unaware..."
Mr Waverly stopped him. "Mr Kuryakin, Mr Givenchy has been most gracious about the loss of his dresses. This is the least we can do to accommodate him. He has assured me that your identities will remain unknown. Ms Dancer, I assume you have no issues with the assignment? "
April nodded."No, sir. I'm looking forward to it. "
"Mr Kuryakin, we are agreed? "
"Yes, sir. I hope I am sufficient to the task. "
Mr Waverly dismissed him with the wave of his hand. "You'll be fine Mr Kuryakin. "
Illya walked down the hall to his office looking as though he was walking to his doom . April took a look at his face, and had to laugh.
"Come on. It can't be that bad. It's just a few pictures. That or you're talking about a $6000 bill. I think you got off easy. "
Illya grumbled ."You are a very good model. I am not. " He stated as if it was obvious.
She laughed and disagreed. " II don't know. I think the photo was sexy. " She tweaked him hoping for a reaction.
She succeeded as Illya gave her the stare of death.
Mark ran into the two of them walking down the hall. He almost burst laughing. April was grinning like a Cheshire cat. Illya looked like a storm cloud blowing through. April was one of the few who could get a reaction, any reaction, from the normally unflappable Russian.
" What did you do to him, luv? " Mark teased.
"Why do you think I did anything wrong? I would never..."
"They might believe that luv. I know better. What did she do mate? " He asked Illya.
Before Illya could answer, she interrupted. "I just complimented him . I told him he looked sexy in this picture. "
Mark choked at her comment, and took the picture she offered. His eyes widened suddenly,. She was right. The picture was sexy. Enchanting was actually a better word. The photographer caught a moment of intimacy that drew the viewer into the moment with them.
Mark smirked as Napoleon walked by them. Napoleon stopped curiosity getting the better of him.
"Mate, you're partner here is trying to seduce my partner away from me. I'll tell you I won't have it." Mark declared as he handed the photo to Napoleon.
Napoleon gawked at Mark as if he'd gone crazy. Illya let out a string of Russian explicates.
April burst into laughter. She really couldn't blame Illya for his reaction. "Mind your language, sir. " April scolded between laughs.
Napoleon had the same reaction Mark exhibited earlier. The picture was absolutely stunning. He had never seen his partner with such a look on his face ever. Napoleon struggled to control a laugh. "Tovarich, wow. I need a cold shower suddenly. " Everyone except Illya broke into laughter. Illya stalked towards his office when Napoleon stopped him. "April ,lovely as always sweet. Tovarich... " He stressed with humor in his voice. "You are not to steal Mark's partner away. I don't want to have to break in another partner. " He commanded to Illya's retreating back.
April grabbed the photo scolding them. " That was not nice. " Then she dissolved into laughter again. "I'll apologize. " She stated taking the photograph.
She walked into his office where he sat sulking in his chair.
He looked up. "Are you quite done humiliating me? "
He was angry. "I'm sorry. " She answered softly. His face softened just slightly."It is a spectacular photo though. "
He stared at her for a minute then smiled slightly at her. "Don't push my patience. I accept your apology. "
She smiled at him."I'm glad. "
Illya dropped the issue from his mind, until two days later when they were required to show up at the photo studio.
April entered excited. She wasn't kidding when she said it was the best part of the assignment. Illya followed her into the studio with an extremely disapproving look on his face . April saw him and smiled.
"You're a world class agent. You're supposed to be able to perform any assignment. You're scared of a photographer. Really Illya. " She teased.
Illya's eyes made extremely clear what he thought about the situation. He grumbled as he went to change into his tuxedo. April quickly changed into her gown admiring the new dress. Givenchy was staying with the red line. The gown was flowing with far softer lines than the previous designs she modeled. She really liked this The dress was simple off the shoulder sleeves and a long graceful draping skirt. It was an elegant gown. She sat as the stylist set her hair. With the jewelry they completed a very elegant, but simple look. It was stunning.
The photographer was very pleased with the effect, and took many pictures without Illya .
Illya entered the studio, and saw April with her back turned to him. They really didn't need him. She was brilliant without him.
"Ah, Mr Kuryakin, I'm pleased you're here. "
April turned around and smiled as she gazed at him.
He stared at her silently. He hadn't wanted this assignment, but seeing her dressed in that gown made it worth the humiliation his partner would no doubt visit upon him.
The photographer very surreptitiously caught his admiration for his partner when they were unaware. Illya made a superb model when he was unaware he was modeling.
The photographer took many candid photos. He could already imagine how he was going to edit some of the shots.
"Ah yes, very good Mr Kuryakin. You two are very well matched. I know this is not where you wished to be Mr+ Kuryakin, but I assure you, you are an excellent subject." The photographer assured him.
"Shall we start with some formal portraits of both of you. " These formal photos suited Illya well. They worked well for cover shots in a display. The money shots were the ones Illya was unaware he was being shot. The looks of admiration when he gazed at her from behind. The look of anticipation, while he waited for her to get changed. It helped the camera had a silent shutter and no flash was required with a fast film speed. Mr Waverly agreed to give Givenchy a prototype to keep with the promise only he and his photographer would use it.
After many hours they took a break to eat lunch. Mr Waverly had warned them about Illya's appetite. The others watched astounded someone could eat that much food. The photographer caught scenes of them at lunch. Kuryakin was relaxed. He loosened his tux bow tie and leaned back relaxed He smiled slightly when April talked to him. All these shots would be edited together to create the spread Givenchy designed. His boss wasn't kidding when he said Kuryakin had amazing features, but was extremely stiff and reserved. .He relaxed with her. She brought his hidden self out.
The agents returned for another several hours of photography. The formal shots would be used to highlight the dresses and April. At least that was how the photographer explained .He explained that many of the shots they took would be the cover for the advertising campaign to introduce the dresses. Givenchy seemed very pleased with the results. He was even more pleased with the intimate informal pictures of the two of them. He could already envision the layout in his mind. He even had an idea that incorporated the ruined dresses into the layout.
First he needed to see his guests before they left.
"Michael, you are pleased with the session.?"
The photographer nodded his head. "A very productive, and excellent session. "
"Superb. April cherie if only I could steal you from Mr Waverly. It was not meant to be. " He intoned dramatically and bent to kiss her hand.
She laughed. "Ever the charmer Mr Givenchy. I greatly enjoyed it. Thank you for the chance to model such marvelous creations. "
Illya looked on until Givenchy acknowledged him. Givenchy offered his hand. "Thank you Mr Kuryakin. I greatly appreciate that you agreed to despite your misgivings. I assure they were seriously misplaced. I am fortune to have the both of you if only for the day. "
"You are most gracious. Again I offer my apologies for Natasha. "
Givenchy shook his head. " All debts are well settled. I believe I may owe you the balance. "
Both, Illya and April, were making to leave when Givenchy stopped them.
"Mr Kuryakin. " He called. " May I ask for the use of your cat however briefly. I believe I have an idea how she add to the appeal of the layout. "
Illya turned to him completely mystified. "Of course, just tell Mr. Waverly when you require her and I shall bring her. "
"Thank you Mr Kuryakin. "
With that bizarre request both of them left curious as to what Givenchy was considering.
Givenchy sent proofs of yhe photo shoots of Illya and April over the following week. Illya had been called back once to pose in shadow with Natasha and the torn dresses.
Mr Waverly sat in his office generally extremely pleased. With some modifications and very creative photo editing the "Cat scratch fever" line featuring Natasha as the inspiration was born. The gowns some formal and some with strategically placed slashes and slits were revealed. Waverly agreed with Givenchy he had a winner.
Givenchy was already back ordered as the new line leaked before it even reached the industry rags. Mr Waverly agreed with a few changes, and the fashion spread was released a week later. It was one of the hottest and mot copied lines almost immediately. As the saying goes all well that ends well.
All four agents had since returned to their normal duties and the dresses and models were quickly forgotten with missions quickly becoming the daily routine again. So, all four agents were mystified when they were called into Mr Waverly's office immediately upon completing successful missions. Mr Waverly applauded both Mark and April for their quick thinking. They managed to smuggle the leader of a small but critical principality away from THRUSH. Napoleon and Illya successfully thwarted a THRUSH plot to infiltrate a senior American and Soviet military base with the plans sabotage both each blaming the other.
Mr Waverly looked at his exhausted but very successful agents. After giving rare congratulations he gave all four of them two weeks vacation partly at medical's insistence.
"Mr Kuryakin and Ms Dancer, I wish to speak with you privately. "
Both stayed behind gazing uncertainly at their partners, who both just shrugged cluelessly. Illya waited stoically. Mr Waverly would explain when he was ready. Mr Waverly reached into a folder at his side, and took out two glossy magazines and gave one to each of them.
" With compliments from Mr Givenchy. He wished to show his appreciation. Apparently his cat scratch fever line has been a great success. Ms Dancer, you will find two gowns in your office as a token of his appreciation. plus a modeling gratuity. Mr Kuryakin here is a token of of Mr Givenchy's appreciation for your modeling services and use of Natasha. Mr Givenchy is quite pleased with the entire outcome and UNCLE as well. Excellent work both of you. I will see you both in two weeks. "
Both got up clearly dismissed. They left shaking their heads in disbelief. Illya opened the envelope, and his eyes goggled slightly at the check contained within.
"Unbelievable. " He mumbled under his breath in Russian.
April laughed as she caught his comment. She had the same reaction as she realized that four destroyed dresses really ended very well for both of them.
She decided to tease Illya to see if she could get a rise from him.
" Mr Kuryakin " she teased. "I do believe you owe me a thank you for allowing Natasha to destroy my dresses."
She heard Illya snort , and then ran into him as he stopped suddenly. He looked at her with a wicked gleam in his eyes.
He quickly entered his office, and came out with Natasha in his arms heading toward April's office.
April seeing Illya immediately ran to her office before Illya could reach it with Natasha.
"I do believe Mr Waverly mentioned two new dresses from Mr Givenchy without Natasha's alterations. We must fix that for you immediately. " Illya grinned evilly at April.
"Illya! DON'T YOU DARE. GET HER AWAY FROM MY OFFICE!" Napoleon and Mark heard April screaming as Illya approached her with the cat in his arms.