"So Elle," Naomi said, leading me down a hallway. "You guys have running water back home?" She was showing me through the Sanctuary and visiting with me as we went.
"Yeah, but it's cold. The school runs on well water, and we have generators, but we try to conserve as much energy as we can." I followed behind as we came into a long hallway with multiple doors.
"These are bedrooms. There's a bunch of people who live here." Naomi turned to me. "My room was upstairs, but there are some down here. Don't go into someone's room without permission, and don't take anyone's stuff."
"Got it." I smiled at her, and she turned to continue giving me the tour.
We walked down another hall and came up to a door that was open. Naomi went right in and I followed.
"This is Dr. Carson." Naomi gestured at a bald man in a white lab coat who was sitting at an office desk. "He's the one you go to if you get sick or whatever."
He looked up and smiled thinly at me.
"This is Elle. She's new." Naomi gestured to me while walking up to his desk. She took a lollipop from a glass and offered me one. I shook my head and she shrugged, taking off the wrapper and popping it in her mouth.
"Nice to meet you." Dr. Carson nodded at me and then looked back down at some papers he had been reading. He appeared very tired, and maybe even anxious.
"Alright, let's leave the doc alone." Naomi spun on her heel and headed out the door. I walked behind her quickly, trying to keep up with her fast pace.
"So the way things work around here is we all get points. You get them for doing your assigned job, and the bigger the job, the more points you get. You can use points to buy shit. So you can get new clothes, food, and basically whatever the hell is available to you."
We went down another flight of stairs and came to a large room filled with people moving about. There were colored window panes and tables spread all across the room. Each table had items; some had jars, others had blankets and clothing. Some people were stationed at the individual tables, and others stood in lines waiting for their turn at each table. It reminded me of an indoor flea market.
"This is the marketplace. This is where you spend points. Or you can trade stuff." She gestured to a woman who was selling quilts. She had multiple blankets folded neatly and stacked on her table. They looked beautiful, and I couldn't help but study her patchwork. The woman caught me staring at her quilts, and I smiled a bit at her. She smiled back.
I couldn't help but wonder about Negan's offer. He was giving me a chance to live here, and I was really considering it. Sanctuary seemed very nice so far. Did that mean my friends could come too? And if they could, would they? I couldn't imagine the others agreeing to leave the school and move in with Negan, and I wasn't about to abandon my friends.
I took one last look around the large room before Naomi led me out of the marketplace and into a locker room. She went over to a dresser and took out a towel, a wash cloth, shampoo, and a bar of soap.
"Why don't you clean up a bit? You look like you could use a good shower." She offered me the supplies and I took them and nodded. I thought about asking if I looked that gross or smelled bad, but opted to just start undressing. I had spent the night on a floor and didn't want to delay the chance of having a refreshing shower.
Naomi wandered around the room as I striped and stepped into the stall, pulling the curtain back. I shivered and pulled the knob.
I gasped when the cold water hit me, and within seconds started to heat up. I couldn't help but laugh as the warm water rolled over me, and I welcomed the sensation.
"Nice, right?" Naomi asked from outside of the shower stall. I poked my head out to see she was sitting on one of the benches with her legs crossed. She was running a hand through her hair and she grinned wide at me.
"It's heavenly," I said, stepping back underneath the water and poured some of the shampoo she had given me into my hand. I lathered it into my hair and moved back under the stream to let it rinse out.
"You can take your time in there. It's the middle of the day, so everyone's working. You don't have to share the hot water."
I smiled and moved my face to feel the flow against it. I hadn't had a hot shower in so long, and I had forgotten how good it felt. It was because of the dead coming back that I realized how much I had taken for granted before. Hot showers, beds, food—I had never truly appreciated those things until they were scarce. I continued to grin as the water poured over my skin, turning it red.
"So did he ask you to marry him yet?" Naomi's voice pulled me from my thoughts. I knew she couldn't see me, but still I furrowed my brow at her question.
"Negan?" I asked, bending down to get the soap and rag.
"Yeah. I suppose you haven't met his wives yet." She said it so nonchalantly, like she had when she told me about the rest of the Sanctuary. I remembered Danny telling me that Negan had wives, but I really hadn't had time to dwell on it. Now that I could process it, I wondered why he needed so many women to swear themselves to him.
"No, he hasn't," I answered, taking the bar of soap and lathering it into the wash cloth.
"I'm surprised. Good looking girl like you would be right up his alley," Naomi said. "He's got a whole harem of them. And they don't have to do jack. They don't work for points, and all they're tasked with is keeping him happy in the bedroom, which is the easiest job in the fucking world. The man's like obsessed with pussy."
I had started to wash my body, but couldn't help but let out a laugh at Naomi's choice of words. I had already experienced Negan's flirtations, and had assumed as much.
"Did he ask you?" I inquired, curious to know. Naomi was a lovely girl, and if Negan was collecting wives, I was surprised she wasn't one of them.
Naomi chuckled.
"Yeah. Right when I came here." She was so laid back and it was easy to talk to her. Perhaps it was naive of me to open up to her, but her entire demeanor made me feel relaxed. I wondered if that's why Negan had picked her to be my guide.
"Why didn't you say yes?" I asked, rinsing the soap off my skin and looking down to watch the suds disappear down the drain.
"I'm not into dick," she replied simply. I let out a chuckle and she laughed with me.
I couldn't help but think about being married to Negan, even though he hadn't even asked. I didn't think I could say yes to a man that had killed my friend, but he had shown me kindness, letting me off for my lie. The Sanctuary seemed incredibly safe, and things appeared to be really good, all things considered. Eric and Amy could raise their child and have less to worry about. Compared to the school, it was clearly the better choice. I knew that my friends wouldn't want to leave Doveport, but it couldn't hurt to try and convince them. Hot water would make a good selling point.
I finished rinsing the soap and turned off the water, reaching out and taking the towel Naomi was handing me. I dried off and pulled on my same clothes, but still felt so much cleaner than I had before.
"I know there's still a lot of the tour left, but I haven't slept." I explained, zipping up my jeans and drying my hair.
"No, I totally understand. You look exhausted. We have a room available, but we should grab a bite to eat before you hit the hay." She walked out of the shower room and I followed behind. My hair was still damp but I didn't mind—I smelled clean and was grateful.
Naomi led me into another large room, but this one had multiple lunchroom tables. There were even more people inside, and they all had plates of food in front of them. At the far end of the room was a long table that was set up like a buffet.
"Go sit. I'll get you your plate." Naomi pointed over to an open spot at a table, and I walked over and sat down. I watched her get in line at the little buffet. It only took her a few minutes, and then she was back with a tray of food for the two of us. I smiled to see there was spaghetti and a pitcher of water on the tray with two little glasses. My eyes widened in surprise to see freshly baked bread too.
Naomi sat across from me and we both started to eat.
"So, you're from that school, right?" Naomi asked, twirling her fork in her spaghetti.
"Yeah," I responded, and took a bite of bread. I savoured the fluffy texture, and couldn't help but immediately take another bite. Bread was another thing I had taken for granted.
"Can I ask what happened there? Rumor has it, you spent the night in a cell," Naomi set her fork down briefly to pour some water into the glasses. I nodded slowly and looked up at her from my food.
"I lied to Negan. Danny told me he goes easier on women, so I told him I was the leader. Negan found out I lied, and that's why I'm here." I wasn't sure why I was telling Naomi all of this, but I felt I could trust her.
Naomi raised her eyebrows.
"I'm shocked you're still alive. Negan doesn't usually tolerate that kind of shit. People who mess up around here almost always end up getting punished."
"Punished?" I set my fork down.
"He's known for burning people's faces when they break the rules. There's a couple people around here who have the scars to prove it. And that's not even the worst thing he's done." She shook her head and made a disturbed face, as if just thinking about it was making her sick.
"That's horrible. I know he has the tendency to be a little extreme," I replied, thinking about what happened with Seth. I wondered how many people Negan had killed. Did he even know?
"Tell me about it." She continued to shake her head, and then looked over my shoulder and her eyes narrowed.
I turned to see a man enter the dining room and head right for Naomi and me. I spun back to my plate and picked up the bread, taking a big bite. The man rounded the large table and sat down right next to Naomi. He was very close to her and I could see her tense up. He had a huge scar on his face and a tattoo along his neck. His head was shaved, but he had a dark patch of hair on his chin.
"Hey, Naomi!" he said, putting his arm around her shoulder. "Who's your friend?"
"The new girl," Naomi answered coldly, staring down at her tray. I noticed she didn't give him my name like she had with the doctor.
"Hey, new girl." He smiled at me and I nodded at him, not understanding what was happening. He was clearly making Naomi uncomfortable, and that was making me feel uneasy too.
"You liking this place?" he asked, taking his arm off Naomi and leaning across the table towards me. His eyes were scanning my down my body and then met my gaze again.
"Yep," I answered, looking down at my food. I knew he was still staring at me with that creepy smile on his face. We sat in silence and no one spoke, so I looked back up at him, and his grin grew even wider.
"She one of Negan's?" he asked Naomi, turning to look at her.
"Does she look like she's wearing a dress and heels?" Naomi snapped. The irritation was obvious in her voice.
He smirked at her remark and then turned his head to take me in again. I did my best to avoid eye contact.
"I'll let you ladies enjoy your lunch. See you around, new girl."
He continued to grin at me, and then stood up from the table without saying anything else. I turned around slightly and watched him leave the room. His presence had me feeling less hungry, but didn't want to waste any food.
"Sorry about that," Naomi mumbled, still looking down at her plate. "Some of the men act like pigs around here. They try to mimic Negan's demeanor, but most of them fail miserably. That's probably why he's in charge. Ladies love him, and men want to be him."
"Not all ladies," I pointed out, smiling at her. Naomi chuckled and nodded.
"True." She pointed her fork at me, and then brought it back to her lips, taking another bite.
We finished eating, and afterwards Naomi showed me where we put the trays and garbage. Then she led me back into the hallway and towards the bedrooms we had been at before. She walked right up to a door and twisted the knob, and then motioned inside.
"It's all yours," she said, and I walked in to see a twin bed and a little dresser pushed against the wall. There was a small desk with a chair across the room and a few toiletries were set neatly on the desk. It was a cozy little room and after taking it all in, I turned to her and smiled.
"You get some rest, okay? I'll come check on you in a little bit. Have a good nap!" Naomi pulled the door shut and I continued to look around the room. I sighed in relief, realizing I was finally going to be able to crash. The hot shower had me feeling drowsy.
I walked over to the bed and pulled back the comforter. It was light, but I couldn't wait to curl up underneath it.
I had just started to kick off my shoes when I heard the door open behind me. Thinking it was Naomi, I turned to greet her, when I saw it was the man from earlier—the one that had sat down with us and had acted so weird.
I tilted my head a bit in confusion, and then felt my heart drop as he pulled the door closed behind him.
"What are you doing?" I demanded.
He continued to smile and started to move towards me.
"You try out that bed yet, new girl?" he asked, closing the distance between us. I glared at him, and took a step backwards.
He moved closer and I had alarms going off in my head; my fight or flight response kicked in and screamed I needed to get out.
I tried to bolt for the door, but he grabbed my arm and threw me towards the bed like I was nothing. My back hit the mattress and I scrambled to get up, but he crawled on top of me, pinning me down. I flailed frantically, not willing to let this happen.
He clawed at my shirt, and ripped it away from my body in a fast motion. I sat up and tried to shout, but he moved a hand to cover my mouth.
"You better shut your mouth bitch," he hissed. I looked up at him with frantic eyes, and that sick smile returned on his face. He was enjoying my terror.
He was pinning me down so hard, I couldn't get free, but I continued to struggle beneath his grasp. He moved a hand to grasp my bra and breast. I pushed with all my might, but couldn't get away. He was stronger than me.
My chest raised up and down, and I looked over at the door, wishing so badly that Naomi would come back. She thought I was sleeping. She wouldn't be back to check on me for a while.
The man started kissing my neck while still holding me down, and I felt my eyes start to water, knowing there was no way out of this.
I could hear my heart pounding in my head as he started to unbuckle his belt and he forced his mouth on mine. I twisted my head away and he gripped my chin and held me in place so he could kiss me. I felt his tongue enter my mouth, and my hands were grasping for something—anything. He pulled me up and started to kiss my neck and his hands continued to grope my body roughly.
And then I felt my knife—the knife Negan had given back to me.
The man continued to forcefully kiss me as I gripped the handle, unsheathing the knife slowly. He didn't notice as I grasped it firmly in my hand at my side, out of his view. His mouth moved from mine and down my neck.
"Please stop," I begged, as he bit down onto my collarbone.
He laughed at me and got off the bed. He pulled down his pants, and then I felt his hand grasp the zipper on my jeans. I held the knife down and out of his sight. He started to pull my pants off when panic really set in.
I couldn't let this happen.
Without hesitating, I sat up quickly and stabbed the blade into his neck. As soon as it went in, I pulled it out and the sharp edge ripped out in one swift motion.
Blood gushed as soon as the knife cut through, spraying out all over the bed and me. His eyes grew wide as the realization of what I had done hit him. He moved a hand to feel the wound at his neck, and then his eyes went to me. They were frantic and angry. He tried to gasp for breath, but the wound continued to spray blood over the both of us.
He was no longer pinning me down, so I backed up as far as I could on the bed, still clutching onto the knife. I stared into his terrified eyes as he sputtered, trying to speak, but couldn't form words.
He went to take a step towards me and stumbled, falling onto the floor next to the bed. He was laying so that he was still facing me and I could see the look of terror in his eyes as he continued to bleed out in front of me. His hand moved to the mattress and he tried to lift himself up, but then fell again.
I gripped the knife, and remained frozen in fear against the wall on the bed. It only took a few minutes until the little gasps stopped and the room grew eerily quiet—the only sound I could hear was my pounding heart.
He was dead.
And I had killed him.