Chapter 8
Christmas with the Specters
Donna felt warm, not in an uncomfortable way, she felt cozy, protected, a heaviness surrounded her, she opened her eyes slowly, adjusting to the light that was streaming in through the curtains. She lay facing a large French style window with cream curtains draped where a gap was letting the light shine through. At first she wasn't sure where she was … then the memories of last night came flooding back to her, as well as the tell tale aches in her body. She was in their master bedroom, the alarm clock on the bedside table read 6.04 am.
She looked at the strong muscular arms surrounding her; she gently stroked the back of his wrist as she thought of last night, she remembered leading Harvey upstairs, a bold move; how they had stumbled towards the bed, removing each others clothes, passionately searching, needing, wanting. It brought Donna back to 'the other time'… but yet this time was different, 'the other time' had been a fun youthful exploration and spontanaeity, this time it had more meaning, much more meaning, they had made love. Of that she was certain, gazing into each others eyes; like they could see into one another's souls. Although her memories had not returned, Donna felt from last night's experience, that they had been together forever; Harvey knew her like no other lover had. She just wished she could remember their life together since they had become a couple.
Donna was stirred from her thoughts suddenly, as the arms surrounding her were enveloping her and folding her up into an embrace. She turned around in his arms and was now staring up at Harvey as a blush creeped across her cheeks when his gaze caught hers.
Harvey smiled down at Donna "Hey YOU .. you're wake?!" There was so much warmth in his tone.
"Hey yourself, " Donna smiled coyly at Harvey.
Donna felt herself blush again, she was nervous but knew she shouldn't be. She drew the crisp cotton sheets closer to her chest, immediately aware it was the only thing covering her; even after last night, there was nothing like the cold light of day to make one more self conscious about their body.
She smiled shyly up at Harvey, the memories of their heated night together flooded her mind including her bold proposition; she had even surprised herself. Maybe it was brain damage she considered, giving her a renewed confidence, although the old Donna had returned this morning, now feeling self conscious around him. The old effect Harvey Specter had on her had returned.
Harvey smirked at Donna and moving his head down placed a soft kiss on her lips, Donna responded wrapping her arms around Harvey's neck, the kiss became more urgent, Donna felt a repeat of last night was upon them. The desire building within her.
"Well ... THAT ...was some night ... quite the workout !" Harvey quipped, as he broke the kiss momentarily.
In between kisses Donna responded "Yes .. It .. Was!"
Donna had relaxed now in his embrace, seeing the complete love in his eyes, her self-awareness slipped away; and all that was left was pure love and desire.
"Care for round two?"...Harvey raised his eyebrow with a questioning look towards Donna.
"Thought ... you'd never ask !" Donna answered by smiling and wrapping her arms around his neck and drawing Harvey into her embrace.
Suddenly Donna heard a cry ... coming from somewhere on Harvey's side of the bed ... looking over she saw Harvey look at a monitor ... it appeared to be a baby monitor; squinting her eyes she could make out baby James starting to stir and whimper on the screen; immediately she felt a need to go attend to him.
"James ... he's starting to stir ... I'll go check on him ...," Harvey offered.
"Are you sure? ... I can go, you need your rest!"
"No you stay here ... and you rest ... you're gonna need it ... big day ahead .. Christmas Day and all! Then when you are rested ... take a bath" ... leaning across, Harvey kissed Donna as he rose to go check on James.
"I want you to take it easy ... remember the doctors orders."
"Wonder what they'd have to say about last night." She raised her eyebrow up in jest at Harvey.
"I'd say that they'd say it was good therapy, plus you were VERY demanding, they would actually be more concerned for me, you know, I could take a heart attack at my age," he laughed as he put on a tracksuit bottoms and a grey top."
Donna smirked "YOU haven't seen anything yet Mister!" She felt her confidence returning.
Harvey smiled "Don't worry Lily's not due to wake for at least another hour, so take your time."
Donna hated that she wasn't fully able or ready to be there for her children, she still needed help as she still got tired quite easily.
"I want James and Lily to know their Mom is back and here for them".
Harvey smiled "Donna ... don't worry they know, now relax while you still can." He reassured. as he headed out their bedroom door to go tend to James in the nursery.
...
Donna got up straight after Harvey had left to go check on James, she decided to shower quickly as she wanted to make sure she was ready when Lily woke up. This is what she had worked so hard to recover for; to spend Christmas with her family at home. She was determined to be as present as possible for Harvey and her children.
After her shower Donna went to her walk -in-closet; looking at the fabulous dresses, she knew that yes these were definitely her clothes; she picked out a beautiful dark burgundy dress with beautiful flared crochet sleeves. Then she quickly did her hair and make -up. Opting for an up style. She added a pair of drop pearl earrings to complete her Christmas outfit.
Looking in the mirror she was happy and set off out of the master suite towards the nursery, eager to see her children.
Donna looked into James's room first as she knew Lily wasn't due to wake yet.
Upon entering the room she saw Harvey giving James a bottle; and talking to him; the scene warmed Donna's heart, seeing Harvey bond with their son.
Harvey smiled over at Donna as James sat in his lap, content and sucking his bottle.
"YOU. Look. Amazing Donna!" Harvey was stunned by his wife's beauty.
"Doesn't Mommy look amazing James!" he said excitedly to his son.
"Said I'd make a little effort" she smiled at the two of them.
"Now Mister ... I'll take over ... And I'm not taking no for an answer, you go get ready NOW please, its Chrismas Morning after all. Don't worry Rachel showed me how to do it all yesterday. I can manage." Donna was adamant.
"Ooh always liked you bossing me about ... well then ... If you're sure?"
"I am, just want to spend some time with my little man here before we get his big sister up!"
Harvey placed a kiss on her cheek as he placed James into her arms.
James cooed and smiled at her, Donna felt sure he recognized her immediately.
"He is so happy his Mommy is home and so am I."
"Donna smiled " He is, isn't he?" he cooed, and then James said something that made Donna's heart melt, he said " Dada, Dada "…
Harvey gasped "Yeah buddy, I'm Dada and this is Momma ... " Harvey was mesmerized by his son's first words, but at the same time, he didn't want to leave Donna out. Donna had tears in her eyes, it was all so overwhelming. Hearing her son speak for the first time; a couple of tears trickled down her face.
"Is that the first time he's said that?"
Harvey nodded over come with emotion too. So grateful they were here together for this special moment.
"I was here for it, we're all home …. Its just so emotional!… I'm so happy…. I never thought .. we .. us .. its just so perfect!."
Donna and Harvey hugged with their son cooing in between them.
"Now go Mister your shower! ... its gonna be a busy day !" Donna sniffled, still overcome with emotion.
"Thanks, And Harvey ... we'll have to take a rain check, on you know what Mister ... until tonight!" she smirked.
"Will hold you to that!" He smirked back leaving the nursery to go get ready.
...
Rachel was up and in with Lily when Donna brought James in to check on her.
Donna complimented her on her beautiful red and cream wrap dress.
She helped Donna bathe and get the kids ready in beautiful Christmas outfits. Lily had a beautiful red and green check dress with a matching bow in her hair. Little James had a beautiful reindeer sweater and navy trousers.
Donna watched Rachel with her children and thought what a wonderful Mom she would make. She wished it dearly for her friend.
Donna felt sad for Rachel, knowing that they were struggling to have children. She felt almost guilty that she had James and Lily and wishing she could remember the experience, when her friend was obviously going through such a struggle to have a family of her own.
When they were finally ready they all headed down stairs with eager anticipation to begin their Christmas Day!
...
"Mommy, Mommy did Santa Claus come?" Lily kept asking excitedly as they came down the stairs.
"Lets go and see under the tree hunny." Donna hoped 'Santa Claus' had remembered to put the presents under the Christmas tree.
Donna could see her daughter jumping up and down excitedly at the thought of Santa as they entered the living room. It brought her back to her own childhood Christmas memories.
"Come here ... look under the tree Lily." Mike was there beside the tree when Lily entered the Living room.
Donna saw huge boxes had been placed under the tree wrapped in children's Christmas wrapper and tied with pretty bows.
Donna mouthed a silent thanks to Mike for all his work helping Harvey prepare for their family Christmas.
"Can I open the presents Mommy," Lily asked sweetly.
Donna was impressed with her daughters manners.
"Ok just a couple before breakfast, I'll help you shall I?"
Donna helped as Lily opened up two beautiful presents, a pink bike with stabilizers and a doll's house.
Lily was so excited and started playing with her Doll's house immediately.
After a little while Donna suggested they get some breakfast before any further excitement took place. Lily was reluctant to leave her toys, but with some gentle coaxing Donna assured her they would still be there upon their return.
With everyone finally in agreement they headed to the kitchen for breakfast.
...
When they arrived in the kitchen Harvey was already there making some breakfast pancakes and eggs and bacon.
Donna looked at domestic Harvey and the sight before her warmed her heart ... he was wearing a beige slacks and a Christmas sweater with a reindeer to match James's. How he had changed Donna thought; she never thought she would live to see the day ... Harvey Specter in a Christmas sweater!
Mike and Rachel arrived into the kitchen, followed shortly thereafter by Marcus, Katie, Lily and the kids, who had all stayed over the previous night for Christmas.
Harvey's Mom held James and Donna had Lily on her lap as they sat down to Harvey's Christmas breakfast together.
Donna looked around the scene before her, almost pinching herself, that this was her reality now, a big family Christmas together. She could not have been happier!
...
After Breakfast Rachel insisted that Donna spend time with her children, she was going to prepare Christmas dinner with Lily, Katie and Mike.
Reluctantly, Donna agreed, she felt Rachel had done more than enough already.
"Now Donna ... I don't want to see you near the kitchen, you hear me, holler if you need anything" Rachel insisted.
"Ok Rach you are Ms. Bossy boots today" Donna laughed as she and Harvey took the kids into the living area to spend some quality family time with them.
...
As they sat with their children in the living room, Harvey looked towards Donna thoughtfully.
"What Mister? what's wrong, why are you looking at me like that?" She smiled curiously at him.
"Nothing ... absolutely nothing ... You know I've said this before ... but due to what's happened ... I want you to know, in case you need to hear this again... Donna I'm so sorry ... if I could turn back the clock ... well lets say we'd have teenagers by now ... I fell for you ... but waited 12 goddamn years to admit it to myself and to you." Harvey was in a contemplative mood, these past few weeks had made him look back at his life.
Donna looked at Harvey ... her Harvey seeing his watery eyes "Harvey look at me ... It happened the way it was meant to happen ... who knows Harvey ... maybe neither of us would have been ready ... no regrets ... there were two of us in denial after all. The main thing ... is that we got here ... I'm so happy ... WE are so happy!"
"Yes we are so happy!" He completely agreed.
"You know Harvey ... I looked at you this morning, with the kids, ... all domesticated!" Donna laughed at the final part.
"I never thought I'd live to see you in this role, or that I would be any part of it !" Donna was slightly somber now, thinking how differently it could have all turned out.
Harvey knew it was time to lighten the mood "Donna you were a huge part of it ... he was smirking now ... and come on ... you never thought you'd be a part of this? I know for a fact ... You told me once yourself ... you dreamed of this future ... And you know what ... when I was finally able to be honest with myself ... so did I and it was with you ... always with you!"
Now Donna felt it was her turn to cry, she dabbed at her eyes with a tissue, she beamed at Harvey in wonder.
"God I missed you Donna ... I don't know what I would do if you hadn't made it!" A tear fell down Harvey's cheek and he promptly wiped it away with the back of his hand.
Thinking of her children and Harvey left without her chilled Donna to the core ...
"I'm not going anywhere Harvey." Donna was adamant, she beamed at him and placed a reassuring hand on his knee. Harvey followed suit placing his hand on top of hers.
...
Around midday Donna's parents, who had been staying locally, arrived for Christmas dinner; they had brought lots of presents with them for their grandchildren.
She was so happy that they could spend the Christmas with them. She had always been closer to her Dad, she had always been a Daddy's girl. But she made a mental note to improve her relationship with her mother. She realized now, having a daughter of her own, how important that connection was.
Donna couldn't believe how the relationship between her father and Harvey had improved so much ... the two men had found it difficult even being in the same room together previously ... guess putting a ring on his daughter's finger finally! ... really did soften Jim Paulsen, she pondered as she laughed silently to herself.
...
"Dinner is served you guys!" Rachel announced to the assembled gathering in the Living room, just after 3 pm.
Rachel and Harvey's Mom along with Mike's help had prepared a feast for their Christmas dinner.
They all sat around the beautifully laid out table. Lily sat once again on Donna's lap while James was in his high chair beside Harvey.
Harvey began with a toast "I'd like to toast Donna and the joy she has brought being back home …. "To Donna … to Donna" they all happily clinked their glasses together, so glad to have their wonder woman back in all of their lives.
The turkey, mashed potato and vegetables were all passed around the table.
The assembled crowd chatted away merrily over dinner, there were laughs, stories and memories shared over a traditional family Christmas dinner.
Donna took it all in ... making sure to capture in her mind each treasured person there, knowing she was lucky to be alive, to share in this joyous family occasion.
...
After dinner and dessert, Donna insisted that she helped to clear up. Then everyone settled into the large open living area to chat next to a roaring fire.
They put on Christmas movies for the kids and if they were honest ... for themselves too.
Donna had an idea, and whispered to Harvey who was on the sofa beside her "Go have some time with Mike, he's in the back kitchen, I think he could do with some guy time, ... besides ... you need to thank him for all he has done for us."
"Ok ... if you're sure you're OK here?"
"Yes, now go, you could do with a beer and so could Mike!"
Harvey smiled at Donna ... she was always thinking of others.
"OK then ... can't say no to that" he placed a kiss on Donna's cheek as he got up to go find Mike.
Donna relaxed and settled in to watch the Christmas movie.
...
Harvey had found Mike in the kitchen helping Rachel tidy up.
He offered him a cold beer and they took it to the large sun room at the back of the house.
Sitting down Harvey knew this catch up with Mike was long over due, besides the hospital, they had not seen much of each other since Mike's return from Chicago.
"Mike, I just want to thank you so much for everything. Donna and I could not have managed without you guys."
"You would have done the same for us Harvey".
"That is true, because You ARE Family to me Mike, you always will be!"
"You know, I knew there was something special about you ... the day I hired you!"
"I want to thank you too Harvey ... taking a chance on me like that ... that day changed my life ... led me to Rachel ... wow! hard to believe, that's well over a decade ago now, where has the time gone?!"
"Meeting you Mike ... it changed me too ... you made me look at myself ... how I treated people." Harvey admitted.
"So I helped turn you into the 'Family Man' we have here before us today?" Mike laughed and smiled brightly at Harvey.
"Yeah ... guess you could say that Mike." Harvey smiled sincerely at his friend as he took a sip of his beer, he didn't even miss his Macallan.
"Thank you!" He gave Mike a pat on the shoulder.
"To Friendship," They both clinked their bottles in a toast.
"Glad you decided to return from the Windy City Mike!"
"Me too .. it was a great experience ... but THIS is home"
"You know Harvey ... I know you've been avoiding the office ... you know since Donna's attack and all ... I know I've said this before ... you're not to blame ... if anyone has anything to be guilty about then it's me ... lay this at my door .. not yours! If I hadn't took that deal .. then Gallo .."
Harvey cut in then, he couldn't have his friend blame himself "Mike .. I knew Gallo a long time before you even met him ... I've thought about this for so long now ... I was wracked with guilt ... and what I have figured ... is that ... we could not have predicted what happened .. he was a mad man Mike ... it's time to forget him ... time to look to the future, if we don't THEN HE WINS!"
"You're right Harvey ... I'll drink to that" Mike chipped in.
"To the future" they both chimed, as they clinked their beer bottles in a toast once more.
...
Later that evening, Rachel and Donna sat in the same sun room after the guys had returned to the TV room.
Donna had brought in a bottle of red wine and poured them each a glass.
Rachel found some blankets for them, as the sun room was on the cooler side in the winter time. Still it was nice to have time away from the chaos.
"So finally some alone time," Rachel sat down with her glass of wine and took a sip.
"Mmmh ... Donna this is so good!"
"Harvey's Mom brought it" Donna took a sip herself and savoured the full bodied flavour.
Donna had seated herself opposite Rachel on the beautiful cream Ottoman furniture in the sun room.
"To Christmas" they toasted as they clinked glasses.
"Where is Lily? ... I mean Harvey's Mom .. anyway," Rachel asked. She hadn't seen her in a while this evening.
"She was tired, took James up early to bed, think all this has really taken it out of her ... everything that has happened to me," Donna felt guilty that her mother-in-law had faced such a heavy burden in recent weeks.
"She was great you know ... the kids adore her."
"I know ... I'm so happy that Harvey and Lily reconciled." Donna was truly grateful for that and knew it had helped Harvey put his past issues to rest.
Changing the subject slightly ... Donna added "You know Rach, I just wanna thank you so much, you ARE such a wonderful friend to me!"
"And you too Donna, I'm so happy to have you back, I've missed this ... but to you ... I guess it feels like we haven't been apart, that Chicago never happened?"
"It is kind of difficult to explain" Donna began ... "You know ... it was like that ... when I first woke up everything ... going to work for Louis ... all that seemed like it had been the previous week ... but now... now that time seems ... well it seems further back in my mind... and the more recent things.. well .. they have like a blanket of fog over them, with the little clouds lifting every now and then... if I'm lucky!"
"Donna I'm so sorry," Rachel said placing her hand on top of Donna's in an attempt to comfort her.
"Rach don't be ... I know that I'm lucky to be alive and to have my friends and family around me."
Donna took another sip of her wine and decided to broach the next subject of their conversation carefully
"About what we talked about last night Rach ... I just want you to know I'm here for you ...OK?"
Rachel nodded looking into her wine glass, giving it a swirl, and attempting a half smile while contemplating.
"You're still so young ... you have plenty of time for kids and ... there are treatments!."
"I know ... its just ... I thought it would just happen you know? I never considered it wouldn't ... everyone I know... well it just seemed to happen for them .. Even ..." Rachel stopped herself then.
"Even What Rach?" Donna was curious.
"Nothing... it's just I thought it would just happen; we are four and a half years married for Gods sake! With you and Harvey... well you know ... you guys weren't even trying"
"That's news to me, What happened to uber careful Donna?," Donna quipped laughing at herself now.
"Love happened ! Well ... that's what you told me." Rachel raised her eyebrow taking another sip of her wine, then burst out laughing. It was good to lighten the mood.
"I really do tell you everything Rach, don't I?," Donna laughed back.
"I suppose ... I could fill you in on your own life if it doesn't come back?" Rachel offered.
"You may have to ...Rach ... you may actually have to! You know you're such a wonderful friend!" Donna smiled at Rachel with sincerity.
"So we weren't even trying? It just happened ?" Donna was so curious right now.
"How much did I tell you Rach!" Donna feigned shock and then laughed, she had really missed their girly chats.
"Enough already!" Rachel said giggling "Where do I start ..."
"At the beginning and I want every detail!," Donna said, as she poured more wine for her friend.
Donna figured, fill Rachel with enough wine and she would indeed fill her in on some of the gossip she had forgotten.
They sat like that, like old times, chatting and laughing for over an hour discussing everything from the day Donna told Rachel she was pregnant to Rachel and Mike's time in Chicago and their attempts to have a family.
...
Later that night Donna and Harvey climbed the stairs together to check on their children before going to bed.
Donna knew she still needed the help and support of friends and family but she wanted to be as involved as she could be with her children.
It truly had been a fabulous family day and she thanked God to have been here to see it.
...
Donna tucked Lily in, she still lay awake overtired from the Christmas excitement. Harvey started reading her a story book that had been a Christmas gift from Donna's parents.
Once they were sure Lily was fast asleep they left her room leaving the door ajar, with the light from the landing shining through; Harvey explained she felt safer that way at night. Donna couldn't believe, she had the same request as a little girl. Lily may look like Harvey but she smiled knowing there was a good measure of her own personality in her daughter too.
After checking on James, who had been sleeping for a couple of hours already, they set the baby monitor and left the nursery together.
Harvey raised his eyebrow "Now about that rain check this morning Mrs. Specter!"
Donna grinned widely at Harvey. Things had never been better between them, she was completely in love with him, always had been!
She felt tonight ... that she really did have it all !
"Lead the way... Mr. Specter !"
Donna placed her hand in Harvey's as he led them to their master bedroom for that most anticipated and overdue second round!
...
Thank you for reading, hope you enjoyed this chapter!
Always love to hear your feedback! It is very much appreciated !
Mary xxx