A Frenchman in London Chapter 6: The Men We Love, a Hellsing + Code Lyoko Crossover fanfic

A/N: I'M ALIIIIIIIIIIIVE!

Sorry, been a year end of ups and downs. First off, the good news: I GOT MY FIRST JOB AT OFFICE DEPOT! I'm mostly working freight (and handling the register occasionally) but it's paying good for my nerdy expenses! And hopefully I'll go back to school this summer!

Now the bad news: on November 7, my precious dog, Shadow, whom I still love with all my heart, passed away peacefully at the age of 11. He was buried that morning at McGehee Clinic in Memphis with much condolences from everyone who knew him well. Dad's Facebook was filled with friends wishing him and us well and all that good stuff...

...and then a sliver of hope came a month later we rescued a black lab puppy from his horrible life! He got away from us because Dad scared him, but my sister found him and got him back! Now he loves her and me the most!

AND HIS NAME IS THE BOSS! KOJIMA IS GOD! BOSS IS DOG! KOJIMA IS GOD! BOSS IS DOG!

...anyway...

I made it my New Year's resolution to finish all my unfinished stories by the end of this year and, seeing as I want this one out of the way most of all, I finished Chapter 6 with Chapter 7 close behind! For real this time!

In the words of the great philosopher Takahata101: PLEASE SUPPORT THE OFFICIAL RELEASE...you Protestant fuckbuckets.

Chapter VI: The Men We Love

As Seras Victoria jumped down from the roof of the smoldering Hellsing headquarters, she saw something that she did not see before out of the corner of her eye. At first she thought it was just a poor bird flying in the wrong place, but no bird she knew was that large or that shade of pink. When she turned her head around to get a better look, she realized that it was not a bird but a young woman, clearly younger than her, with large pink wings on her back that seemed almost angelic.

"Who the heck is that?" she asked herself, and then used her enhanced vampire's sight to see farther than any normal human being could see.

The girl looked to be about fourteen years of age, and her hair was a vibrant shade of pink cut in a helmet-like fashion. Her shining emerald eyes seemed to be ablaze with a fire inside of her, and she wore a pink-themed outfit that had a design that Seras could not even begin to fathom where it came from. It was like it was and yet was not of this world at the same time. Another glance at her face prompted a realization from the young draculina.

"That kind of looks like the girl Jeremy told me about," she said.

"What's going on, Seras?" Pip barked from her headset. "Do you see somezing out zere?"

"There's a girl flying towards the mansion," Seras replied. "She looks like Captain Jeremy's description of his girlfriend."

"What do you mean?" Pip asked.

"She's got a weird-looking pink and purple outfit," Seras stated, "and she has large pink wings sprouting from her back. She's really fast, you know, sir. She's flying ten times faster than the airship, and she could get here at any second."

"Zat's not good!" Pip barked. "We don't know if she's really her or not! If she's not, then we need to attack before it reaches us!"

Just then, before anyone could do anything, Seras spotted something else behind the girl. Something like her was moving even more rapidly than her towards them. Upon closer inspection, Seras saw that it was the shape of a young boy, the same age as the girl, but with blond hair sticking up on all ends. His entire being seemed to be crackling with electricity, and the whites of his ice blue eyes were spewing a red and gold aura. He also had wings sprouting from his back, but his were raven black and crackling with purple lightning bolts.

"Captain Bernadotte!" Seras cried. "It's Jeremy! He's flying here, in his Scipio form!"

"What!?" Pip gasped. "What happened to Integra and Walter?"

"Well, he'll be here any second," Seras said, "so let's just ask him when he gets here."

"What about that girl?" Pip asked.

Seras looked, and noticed that the two beings were now flying side by side. Seras realized that she was who she thought she was, and nodded.

"Jeremy being here proves that it's Aelita," she replied. "We have no further need for doubt."

"Well, we also have no need for worry about zose damn vampires when zey come out of ze ship!" Pip said.

"Why's that, sir?" she asked.

Before Pip could answer, she saw hundreds of tremendous explosions far away from the Hellsing mansion.

"Mines, ma chere," Pip replied coolly. "Zese are vampires we're dealing with here. Zey're faster than any human and know our moves before we make them. We're just evening ze odds here. We're weak against vampires, so we play dirty to them for playing dirty with us. Claymore mines with blessed ball bearings, we set zhem before zhey ever flew in."

"Wow, that's amazing!" Seras gawked, clearly impressed.

"Don't act so impressed, Seras," Pip said. "We're facing an army of one thousand vampires, ma chere. We can't go small. Be ready when zhey come, and prepare for Jeremy and his madam to arrive."

"Yes, sir!" Seras nodded, and re-entered the mansion. "But please stop calling me ma chere!"

[+]

As Aelita flew past the burning and crashing dirigible to the Hellsing headquarters, she felt a familiar surge of energy from behind her. She turned around to see a black-winged angel with blond hair sticking up in huge spikes and sparking with lightning. She took another look at him and gasped in shock as she stopped in her tracks. She then noticed that person was none other than me.

"Jeremy?" she gasped, surprised at seeing me in my Scipio state.

"Aelita!" I stopped once I caught up to her. "What do you think you're doing here?"

"I saw the Nazi airships from my house less than an hour ago and I got really worried about you!" Aelita said. "Well, I've been worried since you left, but that's beside the point! When I flew over here, I also saw a bunch of Catholics dressed as knights en route to London! They're being led by a man named Archbishop Enrico Maxwell, who wants to destroy London and then conquer all of England!"

"Maxwell!?" I gasped, and then hissed. "That dirty heathen! He's gone too far! I always knew he hated Protestants and England, but what the hell is he thinking?"

"What about you?" Aelita asked. "Aren't you supposed to be with the Hellsing leader?"

"Well, as you can kinda see, we kind of got pulled into World War III out here," I said, "but we can't talk out here where we can get blasted out of the sky! I have to get to Hellsing HQ! Integra is with Father Anderson of Section XIII, and she's ordered me to return to the mansion to help Seras Victoria and Captain Pip Bernadotte defend the mansion. When I saw you in the sky flying towards Hellsing, I had to find you and find out what you were doing here."

"Well," Aelita replied as we flew to Hellsing HQ, "you didn't think I'd really sit by and watch while Nazis attacked London with you in it, did you?"

"I guess not," I shrugged, grinning sheepishly.

"So who are these people you're talking about, Jeremy?" she asked.

"You'll find out when you meet them," I stated, and spoke no further.

Suddenly, explosions flew from beneath us, and we threw up our shields to protect us.

"What just happened?" Aelita gasped.

"Those were Claymore mines," I replied. "Filled with blessed steel ball bearings, too. The Flying Geese must have planted them to impede the vampire army's assault."

"Vampires?" Aelita gasped.

"Oh yeah, you don't know," I said. "Millennium is an army of vampires led by a deranged Nazi major, and they want to prolong the 'joy' of war for as long as they can."

"And here I thought Professor Tyron and his ninja army was nuts," Aelita shuddered.

"That's why we're going to stop them," I said, and we continued to fly straight at Hellsing HQ.

[+]

After another few minutes of flying, we landed on the roof of the Hellsing manor and reverted to our normal forms. We then used a service door on the roof to descend into the manor itself after we had transformed back into our normal forms. As we ran through the hallways to find Seras, Pip, and the rest of the Flying Geese of Hellsing, we could see the pristine condition the estate was still intact, although we knew in our hearts that it would not be so for very much longer.

"Kind of scary, isn't it?" I asked out loud. "How this could all get blown up in the blink of an eye?"

"My father always told me that war is Hell," she said. "From what I saw by flying over London, he was right about that."

"But war is also fleeting," I reminded her. "Soon this Hell will end, and it will all just be a bad memory."

"Well, we all sure hope so," she said as we rounded another corner.

Just then, we noticed lights coming in from behind a door. We each took a cautionary step forward, and crept up to the door as swiftly and silently as possible until we got there. Right as we got to the door, it swung open and a tall man with a wide-brimmed hat and an eye patch pointed a gun at us, ready to fire. We also drew our weapons, ready to counterattack. Just then, both sides recognized the other and lowered their weapons.

"Captain Belpois!" gasped Pip, for he it was. "So you really did come back."

"Under orders from Sir Hellsing herself," I nodded.

"And I assume this dame is Madame Aelita Schaeffer?" he asked in a surprisingly non-flirtatious manner.

"I am," she replied. "And who are you?"

"Pip Bernadotte," Pip grinned, tipping his hat, "le capitan de la Oise Savages."

"Captain of the Flying Geese, huh?" Aelita stated. "Let's hope you're up to the task at hand."

"Not to worry, mademoiselle," Pip smiled. "For now, those freaks are pinned down by the line of mines. We're ready for anything those Nazi bastards will throw at us." His expression suddenly turned serious. "But we must still beware. Any other day, they'd run like dogs. But these things aren't afraid of death…"

"They are death."

His words made a small and uncomfortable silence echo in the room. Suddenly, a new noise was heard, and I felt something far away like an ancient arcane art being recited.

"Sir, we're detecting a new movement from behind the enemy line!" one of the soldiers said. "It appears to be the group leader!"

Suddenly, we saw that the outside was being taken up by a gargantuan fuchsia blob that was getting bigger and bigger every second. What was worse was that once it peaked at 91.44 meters tall, which would be about 300 feet, it took a definitive and much, much more terrifying shape: the shape of a gargantuan and muscle-bound woman with an absolutely immense scythe. Her sheer size completely dwarfed the mansion, and she gazed into the room we were in with a glowing scarlet eye that encompassed the window. We were so filled with pure terror that not one of us could speak or even move a muscle.

"What… the hell… is that!?" one soldier gasped.

"Mon Dieu," Pip swore. "Nobody said that they could do… this!"

Aelita and I couldn't even speak or act in response. This was like nothing we encountered in the Lyoko Wars or in the Third Cobra War. Our minds were barely able to process this new sight, and I felt every muscle in my body go numb and my every hair stand on end.

Before anyone else could think or say anything, the giantess lifted her scythe into the air and, with a horror-filled look in our eyes, sent it crashing on top of the mansion, ripping the building in two and scattering soldiers and debris everywhere, somehow missing Captain Pip, Seras, and ourselves. Half the company of the Wild Geese were impaled by the debris and others were all gravely injured as we all gazed out from a giant hole splitting the Hellsing manor at the colossus who unleashed this catastrophe.

"This…can't be happening!" Pip gasped. "We're getting torn to pieces by a giant!"

The aforementioned giant then twirled her scythe and tore yet another hole into the mansion, scattering more men and destroying more of the mansion. Seras was so filled with fear that she could barely hold her gun, and Aelita and I could barely even think about how this was even remotely possible. We then looked around at all the soldiers, who were none the better for this entire nightmare.

"She's gonna kill us all!" two soldiers cried as they huddled in fear.

"My arm, it's gone!" another said as he clutched what was left of his right arm. "Where the fuck's my arm!?"

"Please help me…" still more moaned as they lied either in a bloody mess or a cowering wreck.

None of us could speak or even think. Pip and Seras turned with fear to face the wild form of the towering giant who had torn our entire line of defense with no effort at all. Seras finally lost it and dropped her gun as she fell to her knees. As if on cue, Aelita and I followed and shut our eyes, trying to block out even the mental image of this monstrosity.

"This couldn't… possibly be happening…" I stuttered, horrified beyond words.

"There's…no way…that this can be…" Aelita whimpered.

Silence rang in our minds for what seemed like forever.

"Of course it can't be," a voice said. "That's because it's not real."

The shock of hearing a new voice made our eyes flare open as we jumped to our feet. When we did, we saw that everyone in the room, and the giant outside, had frozen solid, as if time itself had completely stopped. We looked around and saw we could still see each other move and speak. Just then, we heard light footsteps and turned around to see who was moving. When we did, our eyes got just as wide as when that giant appeared.

The figure was a boy about my age, and with a face similar to mine as well, but with a more muscular build and an untidy mop of grey hair. But his most distinguishing feature was his eyes, which were black as the night, and an eye-like symbol on his forehead: one lash on the top and three lashes on the bottom.

"What's up, kids?" he said in a casual manner with a smirk on his face.

"X.A.N.A.," Aelita and I scowled, knowing the boy well. After all, he's been in our minds for five years. Literally.

Yeah, remember the evil computer virus we destroyed two years ago? Well, he survived in Aelita's mind and mine as well. He's stronger in mine, for some reason, even though I spent the least amount of time in Lyoko. Maybe X.A.N.A. just thinks I'm more important or something.

Anyway, this is getting way off-topic.

"If a certain scenario makes no logical sense," the evil virus said as he walked across the room, "then the scenario cannot exist. It is logical."

"Of course you'd think about logic first," I growled, stepping in front of Aelita, "you're a machine."

"You don't have to be a machine to tear down this façade," X.A.N.A. said, and motioned around us. "Don't you see that your human eyes will only lie to you?" He then turned to look at Seras, who had closed her eyes, as if she was thinking. "She sees it. Now you should see it too. After all, it's only logical."

With those words, X.A.N.A. vanished and we looked at Seras. Nodding to each other, we closed our eyes and tried to focus on what was logical and true. At first, nothing happened, but then we heard a loud ringing in our minds that went as quickly as it came. Then with a bright flash, we opened our eyes to see…

Nothing. The mansion was completely intact.

"An…illusion?" Aelita gasped.

"It was all an illusion this whole time!" I gasped.

We looked around us and, sure enough, the men were perfectly fine, apart from screaming in fear and huddling like the beast from the illusion was really there.

"My god, she's all I see!" one said.

"My arm!" the supposed armless one said, clutching his completely unharmed left arm. "My arm's gone!"

Seras must have seen through the illusion as well, since she was walking around, trying to bring the men to their senses, but to no avail. Pip was staggering backwards in fear, his blue eyes wide and wild.

"Wiped out…by a damn giant…" Pip gasped. "How is this happening?"

"Because, Captain, it isn't!" Seras yelled, shaking the captain by his shoulders. "This isn't happening! Wake up!" But, like the men, Pip didn't snap out of it. Seras saw our wild eyes and ran to us. "Please tell me you're not seeing this either!"

"No, we saw through it!" Aelita said. "It's all just one giant mind trick! But how'd you see through it?"

"Master told me to 'look with my third eye' or something," Seras said, "since I'm not human anymore; I'm a vampire and vampires can see through illusions. But how'd it happen at all?"

"I don't know how it happened," I added, "only that it's got to be some kind of black magic or something that's from outside the mansion!"

Seras nodded and grabbed her gun, her eyes glowing bright red as she fired several rounds to a far off distance. I noticed that her forehead seemed to be glowing as if she had a third eye. Maybe it's what caused her to see through the illusion as well as see really far into the field to find the source of it all. And from a massive bang outside, it was clear she hit her mark as the crew inside the mansion stopped screaming and stood up in a daze, like they had just woken up from a terrible nightmare.

"What the…?" the first one gasped, feeling his right arm. "My arm, it's fine!"

"What… the hell… was that?" another groaned, rubbing his head.

"Whatever it was," another answered, "that was seriously fucked up."

Pip's eyes were still wide, but not filled with fear anymore, and Seras shook him again. "Snap out of it! It was just an illusion! Witchcraft or something!"

Pip gasped and looked at Seras like he had seen a ghost. "An…illusion? That gargantuan whore wasn't real!?"

"That's right!" Seras snapped. "Jeremy and Aelita saw through it too!"

"Yeah, and we don't have any time to waste!" I said. "They probably know by now that we've broken the spell or whatever and are probably counterattacking as we speak!"

As soon as I had finished the sentence, two Millennium soldiers broke through the windows and tore two men apart with their bare hands and their vampire fangs. Before any more men were lost, Aelita leapt forward and sliced the first vampire in two with her father's battle knife, and Seras shot her cannon barrel down the second one's throat and blew his head to bits. With that done, we managed to catch our breath for a little while.

"Damn, the rats are getting in," I scowled.

Suddenly, a huge explosion came from outside. We looked out the window and saw the entire front of the mansion was blown to bits by grenades and gunfire. Pip scowled. "Defer des put, we've lost the front of ze estate."

Just then, our radio crackled to life. "Captain, we've got trouble!" one of the soldiers said. "They've figured out the land mines! We're getting hammered!" I used my X-ray vision to see outside, and saw the vampire army hopping on knives scattered all around to speed towards the mansion, where they breezed through our gunfire and massacred our front lines. Some of the front assaulters pulled out rocket launchers and blew up a huge chunk of the building and probably some of our boys as well.

I turned to Pip and he pulled a serious face. "Let's gather ze flock. Whoever's alive to hear this: fall back to my position. Keep shooting, though! Make the crowds work for it! Bring all the grenades and plastic you can!"

He then turned to Seras. "Ma cheré?" he grinned.

"Sir?" Seras nodded, snapping to attention.

"We're going to set up barricades here and try to stall zem as long as possible," he said, "while you, mademoiselle, will…make zeir acquaintance." He finished with a sly yet solemn grin. "You're ze ace up our sleeve, Seras. Remember: ze lives of every man in zis room is in your hands." He then nodded at me and Aelita. "Apart from zose two over zere, who are perfectly capable of defending zemselves and ze rest of us too, no?"

"You don't even need to ask, mon capitan," I smiled slyly.

"But of course, n'est ce pas?" Aelita added, giggling.

Just then, Seras gasped as one of the Geese slapped her butt. But when she turned around, her face red, he was red too.

"In case I die," he chuckled, as did the rest of the men. Rather than growl or get mad, Seras made a slight chuckle as well. I turned to Aelita who glared at me.

"Don't even think about it, Belpois," Aelita said curtly.

"It didn't even cross my mind," I waved.

"Oh, I almost forgot the most important part," Pip said. "Seras! You must close your eyes!"

Seras snapped to attention and did so. Pip then leaned in and, to our astonishment, Pip tried to kiss Seras! Thankfully, she opened her eyes and reeled back in shock.

"YOU…KISSY-FACE…WHY?!" she squealed, spitting and shielding her face like a cartoon character. I groaned and slapped myself in the face and Aelita just gave a sigh of contempt mixed with slight amusement.

"You're such a cat, Captain!" one of the men wailed. "I want one too!"

"BUGGER OFF!" Seras shouted at the Geese, who all but Pip put on mock kissy faces.

Soon enough, however, they all laughed it off and Pip smiled warmly. "Seras…just come back to me. Zat's an order."

Seras was still growling at the men, but upon hearing Pip's request, she looked questioning, but nodded fiercely. "Yes sir!"

"Zen go and give zem Hell!" Pip cheered, and Seras nodded as she dashed away, the Geese giving her a friendly honor guard.

"That is one hell of a girl," one of Pip's men smiled.

"Indeed," Pip nodded. "Far too good for ze likes of us." He then hoisted his rifle on his shoulder. "If she dies zis night, we are no longer men; we are cowards, meant for Hell." The men nodded and laughed in agreement. "Seras isn't going to die, not on ze Wild Geese's watch." He then turned to his men. "Make peace wiz your God, ladies! You're dying wiz your boots on, here, tonight!"

"Aw, Geez, Captain, do we hafta?" one of them laughed, sounding almost bored. "If this was some war movie, the guy playing you would be all "if you're gonna run, now's the time", or you'd sacrifice yourself to let us get away."

"Far from it, mon ami," Pip chuckled, taking a magazine from his pocket and clicking it into his assault rifle. "We are all nothing more than prodigal sons who kill for pocket change. Hell, for the fun of it!" This prompted a laugh from everyone, even Aelita and me. This was strangely heartwarming, considering this might very well be the last time this crowd ever saw each other in this life. "C'mon ladies, We have a date with death! Go out, guns blazing, screaming, "Fuck!" Bellies full of lead, hearts full of steel."

Even Aelita laughed at the profanity with the rest of the Wild Geese and poked me in the shoulder playfully. "Let's make sure nobody else dies today, got it, Mr. Einstein?"

I smiled back. "At your command, Madame Einstein."

A/N: OKAY! 4300+ WORDS! MUST DO BETTER! CHAPTER 7 IS COMING! BY THE END OF THE MONTH! AS SOON AS THE NEW JOB IS LESS OF A HASSLE!

I hope to see reviews from anyone who's out there if anyone still remembers me (RECOGNITION, WHAT'S THAT?) and I WILL make more for you all sooner than you think!

-JeremyX signing off!