The First Time Ever Epilogue
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"Mama! Mama!"
Arizona closed her eyes and took a deep breath. It was the first time for weeks that the new baby had allowed her to sleep past five am and for more than two hours at a time, and Ellie was now the one who was wide awake at silly hours. Glaring at her alarm clock that told her it was just a little after six am, Arizona bit her tongue and reminded herself that she loved her child before opening her eyes slightly to see Ellie standing right in front of her face.
"Too early." Arizona mumbled sleepily, reaching to grab Ellie and dragged her into the bed with her. Callie, the heavy sleeper that she was, didn't even stir.
"But I want to see Timothy." Ellie complained. Arizona sighed. She knew she should be thankful that Ellie absolutely doted on her new brother, but perhaps doting on him at a reasonable time in the morning would be preferable.
"Timothy's asleep. He thinks it's too early, too." Arizona told Ellie, wrapping her arms around her daughter and pulling her close. "One more hour and then we can get up."
"'Kay." Ellie agreed, already falling back asleep slowly as soon as Arizona wrapped her arms around her.
Smiling at her success, Arizona smiled sleepily to herself and drifted back off.
The next time they were woken up, it was by the usual morning of little Timothy Marcus' cries. This time, it was Callie who woke up. "I've got him." She mumbled as she dragged her body out of bed, and through to the attached room where Timothy slept.
She smiled at her son who peered up at her curiously. She knew that Timothy couldn't really see anything yet or really recognize her face very well, but it made her happy to think that he was looking up at her.
"Hey, little guy." She cooed, picking him up. As soon as he was picked up his cries ceased and he contently babbled away. "It was attention you needed, huh buddy?"
Just as Callie laid Timothy down on the changing table, Maya walked into the main bedroom, saying nothing before she, too, crawled under the covers and cuddles up beside her sister and mom.
"Is this our new morning routine? Children invading our bedroom?" Arizona fake huffed as she felt Maya climb in beside her. This was not an uncommon occurrence. Their day usually started at around seven am, when Timothy's internal alarm clock would wake them up. Hearing their brother crying, Ellie and Maya would then come into their room and they would all cuddle up for a while before officially starting their day.
"Comfy." Ellie simply said as she sat up. "Timothy's awake!" She exclaimed happily, bounced off of the bed and going to stand next to the changing table, where Callie was just finishing changing Timothy's first dirty diaper of the day.
"Timothy needs feeding." Callie commented, handing the tiny blue bundle of blankets to Arizona, who covered herself up with a blanket before encouraging Timothy to latch on, which he did with no problem. She sighed in relief. In the first few weeks, Timothy hadn't quite been able to get hang of feeding- it had been a matter of concern for a while, but it seemed that things were looking up.
"I'm gonna get ready for school." Maya announced, emerging from her pile of blankets and leaving the room. Arizona chuckled to herself. In the morning, Maya was the least talkative person she had ever met. Even worse than Callie, which was saying something. It amazed her how similar Maya and Callie were- although not blood related, Maya was the complete copy of Callie's personality.
"I'm going to work today." Arizona said excitedly. Now that Timothy was six weeks old, she felt like she was ready to go back to work. Having a new-born didn't present her with many chances to get out of the house, and she was going stir crazy. She loved her son to the ends of the earth, but she was ready to go back. For most mothers, this was a very short maternity leave, but as a raised army brat and surgeon, she was used to being on the go twenty-four seven.
"And I'm going to stay home with my babies." Callie sighed blissfully. Now that Arizona was going back to work, it was Callie's turn to take a good few weeks off to stay home with Timothy. She looked forward to the chance to get to spend some one on one time with her little boy.
Ellie, whose school had a teacher's in-service day, frowned. "I'm not a baby, mama. I'm five."
"Of course." Callie laughed, before correcting herself. "I'm going to stay home with my baby boy and my big girl."
"Better." Ellie appraised. "I need to find Mayabear." She sighed. Ellie was the only one whom Maya allowed to use her nickname, Mayabear. It was a cute thing that the two sisters had. Maya was the only person allowed to call Ellie 'Elliephant' and Ellie was the only one allowed to call Maya 'Mayabear.'. Between the two, they had dubbed their new brother 'Timmybug.' Both Callie and Arizona found it ridiculously adorable.
"You ready to go back to work today?" Callie asked Arizona, sitting down beside her wife who was busy feeding their son.
"More than ready." Arizona nodded. She picked Timothy up and held him over her shoulder, patting his back gently to burp him as she took in his sweet, baby smell. "I don't wanna leave this little guy, though. He's too cute."
Callie nodded in agreement. With a head full of blonde curls already, and blue eyes identical to Arizona's, Timothy was certainly a charmer. She gently ran her hands through his curls. "I just love these curls." She cooed at her son, who was looking intently at her.
"I love them now, yes. But the heartburn was unimaginable." Arizona sighed. She had been pretty lucky in her pregnancy with Timothy, aside from horrible heartburn, the cause of which proved itself when Sir Timothy Marcus was born with neatly a full head of hair. "Every single bit worth it, though." She admitted, nuzzling her nose against her son's golden curls.
Glancing at the clock, Arizona realised it was approaching seven thirty, and she had an hour to get to work. Carefully lifting Timothy up, she handed him to Callie and covered herself up before standing. Yawning loudly, she stretched every muscle in her body to rid herself of the usual morning grogginess.
It didn't take long for her to get ready. She showered quickly, washing her hair and ridding the sleep from the corners of her eyes, and got dressed. She blow-dried her hair and applied a light coat of makeup, staring contentedly at her reflection in the mirror. This was the most human she had felt in weeks. Usually, she spent her days in sweatpants and baby vomit-stained t-shirts, with her hair thrown back carelessly. She loved being a mom. She loved staying at home with her kids. But she was excited to get back in to the normalcy of her life and maintain human contact outside of her own household.
"Ready, amigo?" She asked Maya, popping her head in to her daughter's bedroom. Maya was tying the laces on her Converse, looking preoccupied. Noting that they had roughly ten minutes to leave before they would be late, Arizona sat down on the bed beside her, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder. "Hey, you okay?"
Maya nodded. "Yeah, just a big chemistry test today. Going over the facts in my head." She told Arizona confidently, looking her mom in the eye to convey the truthfulness of her words. Arizona nodded, accepting her daughter's truth. She knew that chemistry was Maya's least favourite and most worried about subject.
"Okay, well, good luck. Text me when you're done. And I'm willing to help with anything. I aced chemistry in high school." Arizona said with a smile.
"Well it's alright for some." Maya laughed as she stood up, slinging her school bag over her shoulder and following Arizona out of the room.
On the way to Maya's school, which was Arizona's first and only stop en route to the hospital, they chattered away quietly. Arizona treasured moments like these in which she could spend some one on one time with her oldest daughter. Because Ellie had just turned five and Timothy was just seeing his sixth week of life, they consumed a lot of her time and energy. And while Maya was a big part of it and understood completely, neither Callie nor Arizona wanted their oldest daughter to feel neglected in any way based on the assumption that she understood.
"Hey, you got this right?" Arizona said encouragingly, taking Maya's hand in her own and squeezing it reassuringly. "You have an extraordinary mind. Pass or fail, a chemistry test does not dictate that. Okay?"
"Thanks, mom." Maya smiled, visibly relaxing. "I'll text when it's over." She promised, exiting the car.
"You better, or you're grounded!" Arizona yelled as the car door slammed shut. "Next stop, Seattle Grace." She said to herself, feeling a rush of excitement.
"Dr Robbins, you're back!"
As she entered the peds floor, finally feeling like home in the familiar corridors, she was approached by one of her long-term peds/ortho patients, Hayden Laing. Hayden had been born with a bone structure defect in her legs, and she and Callie had been working over the past seven months to correct it.
"I'm back! How are you feeling?" She asked, placing a gentle hand on the little girl's shoulder and smiling a friendly hello at Hayden's parents, Matthew and Kate.
"I'm good. Daddy said I'm having another surgery soon?" Hayden questioned as Arizona wheeled her back in to her designated room.
"Yep, as soon at Dr Torres comes back to work, in about two weeks."
"Yay. Then my legs will be better." Hayden said hopefully. "Why did you go away?"
"I just took some time off of work. I had a baby." Arizona revealed, watching in amusement as Hayden's eyes widened.
"You did?" She asked in amazement. "That sounds like hard work."
Arizona laughed along with Hayden's parents. "It was. But Timothy was worth it. Now, why don't you help yourself to this scrummy lunch, and maybe there will be a pudding cup later." She said slyly, backing out of the room and proceeding her morning rounds.
"Thank goodness you're back. You're never having any more babies." Teddy said as she collapsed into a chair next to Arizona in the cafeteria.
"Sorry, my bad. My reparation is your endless supply of baby cuddles."
Teddy narrowed her eyes. "I guess I'll let it go. You look exhausted, by the way."
Arizona proved her point with a yawn. "Three kids, Teddy. I'm not messing around."
The two friends continued to talk away, having the kind of catch up that soothed the soul. Although they had talked plenty over the last few weeks, Teddy being Timothy's favourite aunt and godmother, it was good to be able to have a proper conversation.
Teddy watched Arizona carefully, feeling grateful that for once, her friend's tired appearance radiated happiness instead of ghosts from the nightmares that she knew had plagued Arizona for two years. She and Arizona had known each other for fifteen years, which meant they'd known each other through some of the hardest times in their lives. It made her happy to turn her gaze away from their past and look on to their futures. They were both in pretty good places right now. They had made it.
"You're going to give yourself an aneurysm if you keep thinking that hard. Your brain isn't used to it." Arizona quipped, sipping on her milkshake.
"Oh, haha." Teddy snarked, throwing a fry at the blonde. "I was just thinking, actually, about how far we've come. That we made it through so much."
"Aw, Teds." Arizona said in a high-pitched voice, throwing her arms around her friend. "Who knew you could be so mushy?"
"Well, I was nice for about two seconds. Time's up." Teddy grumbled.
"Okay, but seriously, Teddy. I'm glad I've had you by my side." Arizona said, smiling.
"I'm glad I've had you, too."
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Later that night, after a wholesome day full of surgeries and consults, Arizona walked through the threshold of the house, surprised to hear silence. Checking the clock on the wall in the hallway, she registered that it was approaching 9:20pm. Late enough for Ellie to be asleep, but not so much for there to be silence throughout the house.
Listening carefully, Arizona dumped her bag on the table beside the front door and made her way up the stairs. She could hear, faintly, the sound of the TV coming from the room she shared with Callie and headed towards there.
Stopping in the hallway just outside Ellie's room, she slowly pushed the door open, squinting through the darkness to make out the faint outline of her daughter's sleeping form. She could just see the steady rise and fall of Ellie's chest from the other side of the room. She watched intently, mesmerised by the innocence of such a small child, fast asleep, who was oblivious to the outside world. Unaware of suffering and pain. Obsessed with Mulan and gummy bears.
After a few minutes, Arizona shut the door quietly behind her and made her way through to the master bedroom. When she opened the door, the sight that met her made her want to laugh out loud.
Maya and Callie were sprawled out in identical positions on opposite sides of the bed, and Timothy was lying in between two cushions in between them, wide awake and cooing away happily. Laughing to herself, the leant over the edge of the bed and scooped Timothy up, careful not to jostle the bed too much and wake Callie or Maya.
"Hey, little guy. Did you tire them out?" Arizona cooed softly, walking through to the nursery, which was conjoined with the bedroom. Timothy waved his arm out, his face scrunching up in a cry, one that Arizona recognised was from tiredness. "Oh, baby. Long day, huh?"
Rocking her son soothingly, she lowered herself in to the rocking chair and began to sing softly the only song out of many that was ever successful in getting little Timothy to sleep.
You are my sunshine, my only sunshine;
You make me happy, when skies are grey.
You'll never know dear, how much I love you.
Please don't take my sunshine away.
As she watched Timothy's face slowly evaporate of any discontent or tiredness and be replaced by a look of blank peacefulness, she stood back up and lowered him into his crib, carefully tucking blankets around him, making sure that no part of his tiny body would be cold throughout the night.
As she had done with Ellie, she lingered back a few minutes to watch her son sleep. It was one of her favourite things to do. To see her children, who were so full of life and energy throughout the day be so still and peaceful. It made all of the tantrums, the arguments over whether wearing princess dresses to school was acceptable or not, the debates on curfews and the many, many dirty diapers every single bit worthy.
Re-entering the bedroom, she carefully shook Maya awake. "Maya, sweetie." She gave it a few seconds before she tried again. "Come on, you should go to bed."
It took a few seconds, but Maya eventually stirred and opened her eyes, blinking furiously to rid her eyes of sleep. "What time is it?" She yawned, sitting up and stretching her arms out.
"Nearly 9:30. Time to go to bed."
"M'kay." Maya mumbled, still half asleep. She stood up and wrapped her arms around Arizona. "Aced my test, by the way."
Arizona smiled proudly. "I bet you did. You can tell me all about it in the morning." She told her daughter, watching as Maya shuffled out of the room, smiling at her daughter's half-asleep state.
She quickly changed in to her pyjamas, brushed her teeth and climbed in to bed. As she settled under the covers, Callie began to stir.
"You're home." Callie smiled happily when she saw her wife. "How was your first day back?"
"It was great. Rocked three surgeries and did some consults. What about yours?" Arizona asked, pulling the covers up around her chin and basking in the cosy warmth.
"Timothy had a massive poop explosion. It was just... everywhere." Callie said, her eyes widening in horror.
Arizona laughed at her wife's traumatised expression. "Well, the last time he had a poop explosion he was with me. It was about time you had your turn."
Callie sighed. "I know, but it was just all over the place and it was on my hands and-"
"Shh." Arizona interrupted her. "Don't talk about Timothy's poop when I'm about to kiss you." She said, pressing a soft kiss on her wife's lips. She then grabbed Callie's arm and wrapped it around herself, content to sleep in her wife's arms for the rest of her life.
"Love you." Callie said quietly, already halfway back to dreamland.
"Love you, too." Arizona yawned. Before either of them knew it, they were both sound asleep, getting as many hours of rest as they could before the life they loved soon rose again in the morning.