A/N: This is a little short Christmas special that popped up into my mind – and sorry it's three days late ^^' I got a new laptop and have been very distracted, but the good news is that I finally have a functioning word processor, so I can actually write chapters on my computer now! I don't own the Avengers or Mistletoe! I hope you enjoy!
"What is this Santa that you speak of?" Loki asked as he crossed his lean arms. He was currently donned in a mostly green sweater with white snowflakes sprinkled about it; its neck line rose all the way up to his chin as what the others called a "turtle-neck". It was most uncomfortable, and secretly humiliating. It was a Monday, but not just any other Monday; it was Christmas Eve. The whole concept of Christmas rather baffled the God of Mischief, but the concept of Santa baffled him even more. The humans trust a fat man whom they've never met or seen to come into their residence and leave presents, while they don't trust him to bring forth glorious freedom. Humans were odd creatures in his opinion.
"I just explained it to you Reindeer Games, do keep up!" Tony said as he delicately put another ornament on to a very bright Christmas tree. The god glared at him before gracefully pulling out a candy cane and vaporizing the plastic wrapper that covered it. He delicately licked the curved top and gently bit down on it.
"There's more to Christmas besides making out with candy canes, weirdo," Hawkeye muttered as he set down a box of decorations.
"If this is your definition of 'making out' than I have pity on any mate that you may ever acquire," Loki said with a smirk that awarded him a glare from Clint and a loud snort from Tony. Steve walked in to the living room and glared at all three of them.
"And Christmas isn't all candy and Santa, either. It's about the incredible journey and bi-"
"Yes, yes, the birth of your 'Jesus'. I know, Dr. Banner explained that earlier," Loki interrupted. The captain gave him a disapproving look.
"It's also about finally getting the woman of your dreams to know how you feel about her!" Clint chimed in as he pulled a bundle of mistletoe out of the box. Loki's left eyebrow rose in inquiry as the man of iron and the first avenger face palmed. The master marksman, using a small bow that had previously been concealed in one of his many pockets, shot the mistletoe up onto the ceiling.
"Really, Hawkeye? Mistletoe?" Bruce said with a smirk as he entered from the main entrance to that floor. Thor walked up behind the doctor and looked just as confused as his adopted brother. The two gods slowly walked over to the source of their confusion and stared up at it. The sound of snickering and hushed laughter filled the room.
"What, might I ask is so funny to you mortals?" Loki hissed. Tony pointed up at the dangling plant.
"When two people stand under mistletoe at the same time, they have to kiss each other, not on the cheek or anything like that, but a full on kiss on the mouth," the billionaire stated with a smirk.
"That sounds like something we have back in Asgard!" Thor exclaimed enthusiastically. Loki rolled his eyes.
"Except in Asgard the two people are…bound together for the rest of the night," the younger god remarked. It was Tony's turn to lift an eyebrow.
"Well, we best bear out this Midgardian tradition," Thor said as he turned to face Loki. Hawkeye, who had been about to make some comment on the fact that the gods would never kiss each other, choked on the air in which he had been breathing in as Loki forcefully grabbed Thor's shirt and pulled him down till their lips met. Everyone, sans the gods, jumped slightly when they heard the click of a camera. All eyes went to Bruce who still had his phone in his hand. Loki quickly pulled away from Thor.
"What are you doing?!" the trickster inquired rather harshly. Bruce shrugged slightly.
"Do you know how much money we could make if we published this? Just think about it!" he said before abruptly leaving the room. Clint, who seemed to have finally actually breathed in some air, jumped up.
"That's disgusting! You're brothers! And…and-"
"I'm adopted remember?" the God of Mischief said with a smirk.
"So? That's still, just…wrong – it is very, very wrong!" The marksman wasn't sure if he wanted to throw up or gouge his own eyes out with an arrow to rid himself of what he had witnessed.
"So does that mean you're gay? Cause that's kinda, well…unexpected – at least for Thor," Tony stated with a tad bit of shock.
"Gay? Ah, you are referring to a state of homosexuality. Thor isn't, he loves more women than I'll ever get. And I prefer the term pansexual as I can assume any shape, gender, and species that I wish – though I am rather partial to horses," Loki explained in an even tone. Thor laughed uneasily while everyone else raised their eyebrows in mixed emotions.
A/N: Merry Christmas everyone! And a new year's chapter is already in the works! ;) Stay awesome out there!