A/N: Happy Bisexual Regina Mills week. I'm excited to be able to explore this aspect to her character and I think this version of Regina is one of the best representations of this. Thanks C for the prompts in which Cora meets Mal and Mal goes off on Cora. I would love to hear what you guys think of this update and I hope you enjoy :)
"I don't understand how you can watch this. It's completely ridiculous."
Regina rolls her eyes, tosses her girlfriend a look that conveys every ounce of mild annoyance at her statement. It's not the first time they've had this conversation. Nor does she believe it will be the last. But the bad reality television playing on the screen is one of the ways she unwinds from the stress of school and studying. One Mal teases her about endlessly.
"You're wasting that incredible mind on it, killing brain cells even as we sit here."
It makes Regina laugh, shaking her head at Mal as she clicks the tv off and tosses the remote toward the end of her bed. "Well, what would you rather we do?"
A wicked gleam glints in Mal's gaze as the corner of her mouth twitches playfully, closing the book of sonnets she'd been thumbing through and setting it aside. "Oh, I can think of all manner of things that are more productive for us to be doing with our time. We could be studying for that political science final you've coming up. Or finishing Dr. Hopper's assignment for next week. There's that fascinating article on moral behavior we read the other day we could be discussing."
She's inched closer to her as she's tossed out suggestions, slowly crawling over the tiny twin bed until she's hovering over Regina where she sits against the headboard. Her warm breath ghosts over Regina's lips and she can't help the grin that tugs at her own mouth as she looks up at Mal. "All very appealing ideas," she jokes.
"Or," Mal drawls, voice low and husky in that way that makes Regina shiver, "we could not talk at all." She angles her mouth over Regina's. The kiss warm and wet, leisurely as she tastes the lingering flavor of overly fruity and sweet Jolly Ranchers Mal is inclined to suck on. Her hand lifts to slide up and down Mal's bicep until she's settling her weight half on top of Regina, wedging a thigh between Regina's as the pair of them slide down on the mattress into a more comfortable position.
It doesn't take long for either of them to deepen the kiss, exploring each other's mouths with tongue and teeth, working the other up. Hands begin to wander, Mal's streaking up Regina's torso to her breast, teasing her nipples through the thin cotton shirt she wears. Regina's cupping Mal's ass in her hands, kneading it, encouraged by the little groan of pleasure she lets out.
Regina breaks away, sucking kisses down Mal's neck, swirling her tongue over alabaster skin and reveling in the tiny thumps of her pulse beneath her lips. There's a slow ache building inside her, deep in her belly, and lower, where her girlfriend is subtly grinding her hips against hers. One hand inches up to stroke the smooth skin of her back, fingers dancing up her spine as their mouths meet again, growing needier by the second.
Just then there's a curt knock on the door, one they ignore for another moment in favor of exploring each other. Another rapid succession of three sharp raps sounds again no more than a minute later, however, and Regina groans as she once again pulls her mouth away from Mal's, sucking in a breath of much needed oxygen. "I should get that."
Her fingers thread through Regina's dark locks, brushing them away from her face as she drops her forehead to hers and pecks a light kiss to her mouth again, much calmer than the ones they'd previously been sharing. "Do you have to? We could," she kisses the corner of her lips, tongue darting out to tease, "just ignore them."
Oh, it's tempting. So incredibly tempting to consider as Mal's scent surrounds her, her lips teasing over hers and her body angled above her. But another couple of hard knocks echo through the room and Regina lets out a sigh. Whoever's on the other side of the damn door is impatient apparently. "Doesn't sound like they're going away." Maybe Mary Margaret left her key. Which, if that's the case, Regina is going to kill her roommate for interrupting them. Doesn't she have class for another hour yet?
Resigned, Mal kisses her temple and then rolls to her side, allowing Regina to stand from the bed. She runs a hand through her hair self consciously, straightening the shirt that Mal had rucked up before and catches a glimpse of herself in the mirror hanging on the back of the door, a rumpled mess if she's ever seen one. But, oh well. Hopefully she can get rid of whoever's disturbed them quickly and she and Mal can get back to where they left off.
Mal mutters something along the lines of lighting whoever's on the other side of that door on fire for the interruption and so Regina is laughing, a wide smile on her face as she swings the door open. One that fades quickly at the sight before her.
"Mother," Regina gasps in shock, every thought in her brain sliding away, the corners of her mouth deflating almost comically, as she stares at the woman on the other side of the door. "What are you doing here?"
"Regina," Cora draws, ignoring the question, her New England accent prim and proper, every inch of herself formal and put together to a T. Not that Regina would expect anything less. She frowns as her gaze wanders up and down her daughter's appearance, taking in her mussed hair and wrinkled clothing. "Were you in bed? It's the middle of the day for heaven's sake, dear." There's disapproval in the tone and Regina cringes out of habit as much as instinct.
Her hand tightens on the doorknob, anxiety pinching at her temples as she stutters a stunned, "I was— ummmm, I wasn't expecting anyone."
The helpless shrug of her shoulder only causes Cora's eyes to narrow at her before she counters, "Well, aren't you going to invite me in, dear?"
For a split second, Regina has the ridiculous urge to slam the door in her mother's face, to hide away from the undoubted confrontation that is about to take place, considering her girlfriend is lying in her bed at the moment. That will never do, though, so with a grimace, Regina answers, "Of course," stepping aside so her mother can enter.
Thankfully, Mal's somewhat righted herself. Smoothed down those blonde curls Regina adores and straightened her clothes. Is now sitting up on Regina's bed, and while the comforter is a little bit wrinkled and out of place, the image could have been much worse.
Not that it stops Cora from questioning sharply, "And what is going on here?"
Regina panics, at a loss for what to say, what to do. She hadn't been prepared for this moment to come right now, doesn't have a carefully outlined plan laid before her, and now that it's here she doesn't know how to go about it. How to be honest with the one person she's always sought approval from and always come up short with.
Moving to step between her mother and Mal, Regina waves a hand in her direction, introducing the blonde. "This is Mallory, my… friend." Even as she says it Regina winces at the term. It's not exactly a lie, they are friends, but she's so much more to her than that, and at the raised eyebrow the other woman gives her and the way her gaze remains cool, she isn't sure it was the best way to go. But it's not as if she can tell her mother that Mal's her girlfriend and she's just interrupted them fooling around. The woman would likely have an aneurysm.
Rising from the bed, Mal extends a hand to Cora. "Mallory Draeke. You must be Regina's mother. It's nice to meet you." Her voice is polite and cheerful and Cora eyes her suspiciously, gaze darting back and forth between her and her daughter before she reluctantly places her hand in Mal's and shakes.
"Hmmm, and how long have you and my daughter been friends, Miss Draeke?" Cora questions, just a hint of disapproval in her tone as she looks Mal over.
Regina hates it, the way her mother is judging the other woman, making up her mind about her before she even gives her a chance to get to know her, to discover how amazing she is. Mal is quick to respond though. "A few months now. We're in the same psychology course."
"Ahhhh, I see." Cora drawls, voice haughty and disapproving. There's a million things she's said without words from the tone. Judging her before she knows a single thing about her, merely because she's associated with the topic Regina loves so dearly but she finds frivolous and a waste of time. Typical. "Well, isn't that quaint."
How she can say so much in so few words is a skill Regina has never been able to unravel, but she watches the way Mal's shoulders tense ever so slightly at the subtle barb and feels an echoing pang in her heart. "Mal is brilliant, Mother. One of the brightest in the class. You should hear her ideas about human nature and beliefs. We were just going over some notes."
It's a blatant lie. Not a book or notepad in sight beyond the book of poems Mal had been reading. Cora lifts an eyebrow pointedly and hums again. "Fascinating. I'm sure she is." Cora replies, tone making it clear she believes the woman to be anything but. She turns her chilled gaze back to Regina from Mal and says haughtily, "She appears quite… studious," while eyeing the raggedy Rolling Stones shirt and baggy jeans she's wearing today.
The insult is layered in a thin veil of politeness, but it stings all the same, Regina can see it on Mal's face even though she knows how tough the other woman's skin is. How she rarely lets herself care about what others think of her. It's one of the qualities that had attracted Regina to her so much in the first place.
Before Regina can come to her defense she's gathering her stuff. "I should probably go," Mal mutters quietly, grabbing her jacket from the back of Regina's desk chair where she'd tossed it earlier and moving toward the door.
Regina's hand shoots out to circle around her wrist before she makes it all the way there, "Mal…" but what can she say? She doesn't want her to leave this way, not when she can see the hurt in her girlfriend's eyes, knowing she's the cause of it as much as her mother.
Mal gives her a small smile, but not one that meets her eyes in the slightest, and assures her, "We'll talk later." And without another word, exits her room with a click of the door behind her that sounds far too jarring to Regina's liking.
"Well, now that it's just us we can have a proper catch up. What on earth are you wearing, darling?" Cora huffs.
With a roll of her eyes, still staring at the door Mallory's just left through, Regina takes a deep breath and prepares to deal with the fallout of the unexpected visit.
. . .
It takes her hours before she's rid of her, Mother off to her hotel with plans for them to meet for brunch tomorrow morning before her flight leaves. There's been the uncomfortable lunch, and then Regina showing her around campus and fielding the plethora of questions and barbs over her studies and the campus, the type of student body a school like Berkeley fosters. More attempts to talk her into transferring to Yale where she belongs. How she doesn't understand how she could possibly want to spend her summer in California when she should be home with her family.
The entire afternoon had been exhausting, compounded by the sick to her stomach feeling that had been a lead weight in her gut the entire time. It's why she's here, outside Mal's apartment, anxiously bouncing on the balls of her feet as she works up the courage to knock on her girlfriend's door.
When she finally does and Mal answers the door, already dressed for bed in loose fitting sweats and a light sweatshirt, Regina's heart clenches in her chest at just the sight of her. "I'm sorry," she bursts, unable to keep the apology from spilling from her lips. But she knows she hurt her earlier, not acknowledging what they are to each other and she's desperate to fix it.
Mal tilts her head the side, studying her for a minute before swinging the door open wider and gesturing for Regina to come in. "How was your afternoon with your mother? She seemed every bit as delightful as you've mentioned." Mal asks as she makes her way to the living room, settling down on the couch and curling her legs beneath her as Regina follows.
She hesitates for a minute then simply collapses into the cushions next to her, grabbing her hand with both of hers and waiting until Mal's eyes are looking directly into hers before she repeats, "I am so sorry for earlier. I shouldn't have pretended you were nothing more than my friend, shouldn't have lied, I just… it was such a surprise to see her and I wasn't ready and she's just so…" Her voice trails off, thick with tears she's trying to ward off. She's sick over it, hates knowing she hurt Mal, one of the few people who's been there wholy and utterly for her in her life. "Please don't be mad at me."
Sighing, Mal shuffles closer to her, knees bumping Regina's thigh as she lifts a hand a smooths her dark hair away from her face, cupping her cheek in her palm. "I'm not mad at you."
The relief that gushes through her veins hearing those words is enough to have Regina letting out a low stream of air, the weight on her heart lightening merely a fraction. "Really?"
"Really," Mal confirms. "And I get it, I do. It doesn't make it easy and doesn't mean it didn't hurt a bit, but I would never force you into anything you're not ready for, Regina. I know what we have, what you mean to me and whatever label we put on it for your mother doesn't matter as long as the two of us are on the same page."
She's incredible. The most amazing woman in the entire world. God, how did she ever live without her before they met? The easy support, the natural understanding, are just two of the many reason she's fallen so hard for this woman.
Before she can even think about it, or question whether this is the right time, the words she's been dancing around for weeks now spill recklessly from her lips. "I love you." It's crazy. They've barely been together for three months, had agreed to take this slow, not to rush into anything serious, but she can't deny what's in her heart. To hell with playing it safe.
Surprise flickers into her gaze, but then Mal beams at her, lips curling into the most dazzling smile as she scratches her nails lightly along Regina's scalp and leans in closer to her, nuzzling her nose against hers and murmuring, "I love you, too," into the small space between their lips before they meet.
The kiss is soft and easy, but full of the affection and passion they feel for each other. Firm presses of their mouths, bussing lips together as their tongues tangle together. Regina lets out a tiny moan, cupping a hand at the back of Mal's head as she pulls her closer to her.
When they finally break apart, pulling back to look into the other's eyes, they grin stupidly at each other and let out twin chuckles. "Bet your mom wouldn't have expected that outcome from her little visit," Mal quips, leaning in to nip at Regina's bottom lip again.
Laughter bubbles up in her belly and Regina shakes her head, answers, "No, I imagine not," and sinks into another kiss, swirling her tongue into Mal's mouth. Her hand grips her hip, squeezing gently while their mouths move against one anothers.
Everything in this moment feels right. The taste of honey on Mal's tongue, the scent of her surrounding her, the warmth of her body as they press against each other as best they can in this position. Whatever her mother does or does not think, Regina knows without a measure of a doubt that she and Mal belong together.
"I don't want to hide this. Us." Regina tells her breathlessly when they part for air, determination seeping through her voice. "You're the best thing that's happened to me this year and I am proud to be your girlfriend." Mallory's eyes tear up marginally, wetness gathering at the corners as she smiles at her. "I'm having brunch with Mother before her flight leaves tomorrow. Come with me. I'll introduce you properly."
Mal's smile turns a bit wistful, once again threading her fingers through Regina's dark locks. "Are you sure about that, honey? I won't push you on this, it won't change what's between us. It's something you have to do when you're ready, not because your mother's sprung a surprise visit on you."
Regina merely nods her head, scooting closer to Mal so she can wrap and arm around her waist, stroking her palm up and down her spine. "I'm sure. I want to do this. For me, as much as for you. I'm tired of hiding who I am. I've already disappointed her in my choice of school and career, what's one more thing to add to the list?"
Looking at her in that way she does, like she's staring into her soul, to the very depth of who she is, Mal shakes her head and then draws Regina's head down to rest on her shoulder. "You're not a disappointment. You're an amazing, vibrant, passionate young woman and if Cora Mills can't see that it's her loss."
"Thank you," Regina murmurs softly, lazily running her fingers in random patterns over Mal's knee. She always knows exactly what to say and do to comfort her, to make her feel loved and cherished in a way she's not had all that often in her life. Save for a few exceptions.
Mallory nods, tugs her backwards until they're lying back on the couch, cuddled together and Regina tucks her face into the crook of her neck, inhaling the familiar scent of woodsmoke and lavender. She's a furnace as usual and it only makes her want to burrow deeper into her, letting the relaxing scratch of Mal's nails along her scalp lull her. "I wish Daddy was here. It would be so much easier to face this with him to mediate. I always planned to tell him first, but it's not the kind of thing you drop over the phone."
"You could always wait," Mal responds. "There's no rush. I mean it. I know you're planning to stay in Berkeley for the summer, but you've two weeks once the semester is over before summer classes begin, you could go home then, tell them in your own way."
She has a point. Perhaps that would be better. Less of a blow up that will surely come tomorrow that's for certain. But there's a part of her that knows if she waits, if she puts it off, she'll lose her nerve. Could find all manner of excuses to avoid having that conversation with her mother. With or without Daddy's help or unwavering support for she knows he would never judge her. Has done nothing but love and support her dreams her entire life.
However, that would be cowardly of her and Regina doesn't want to be that person, won't do that to Mal when she's done so much to help her find herself in the last few months. And, frankly, won't do that to herself either. She'd taken the leap and moved across the country to break out on her own and follow her heart. And she's done that, has grown as a person more than she ever imagined she could in the last year.
It's something she's proud of. Whether Mother approves or not.
"I don't want to do that," Regina finally answers, fingers skimming up and down Mal's hip absently. "I need to do it now, while she's here, when I still have the courage to tell her." Her head tilts up to meet Mal's eyes as she admits, "And I think it would help to have you there, to be able to squeeze your hand and know you love me as I am." Just saying it sends a thrill through her and, god, she's so damn lucky. "Will you come with me tomorrow?"
"Of course," Mal replies quickly. "If you need me, I'm there. We can face the firing squad together." She jokes.
Regina smiles, laying her head on Mal's shoulder once again. "Thank you."
"You're welcome, babe."
Her voice is heavy, eyelids drooping shut, the stress and anxious of the day finally catching up with her as she asks quietly, "Can I stay here tonight? I just wanna curl up with you and go to sleep."
There's a smile in Mal's voice as she answers her, "Absolutely. Let's get you to bed."
Whatever happens tomorrow, Regina knows it will all be alright because she has this amazing woman at her side.
. . .
No turning back now, Regina thinks as she and Mal walk up to the rather upscale restaurant Cora has chosen for brunch this morning. Off campus, close to her hotel and away from the unsavory places littered on every corner there. Nowhere Cora would dare to be seen.
A part of her wishes desperately for Granny's. For the familiar scents and sounds of bacon frying and coffee brewing, the old woman nagging at them in that gruff way she's come to adore. Anything rather than the stiffness of the sleek restaurant mother's chosen for this little outing. With its linen tablecloths and fine cutlery. Waiters in crisp, ironed shirts and pants rather than Granny's chunky cable knit sweater.
Nerves swirl and gurgle in her stomach as she pushes open the door.
They walk in hand in hand. Mal's fingers intertwined with her own, palm warm and comforting cupped with Regina's and the feeling of it gives her strength as they make their way through the restaurant to where her mother is seated and waiting.
She can do this. It will be fine.
Maybe if she repeats it enough, she'll start to believe it. She'd meant what she'd said last night, though. Regina is tired of hiding who she is and the gentle squeeze Mal gives her a second before Cora's gaze lifts from her menu to eye them suspiciously only reaffirms her resolve that she's doing the right thing.
"Regina," Cora greets cooly, "what's this? I thought it was just us for brunch." Her gaze zeros in on their joined hands, and before she can continue with whatever likely insulting comment is on the tip of her tongue Regina speaks up, the pair of them taking their seats across from her at the table.
"Mother, I asked Mal to join us. I—" her eyes turn to meet Mallory's, drawing in a bit more courage as she turns her attention back to her mother and dives in head first. "Mal's more than just my friend. She's my girlfriend, we've been dating for nearly three months now, and she's important to me. I wanted you two to have a chance to get to know one another some before you leave."
The silence is deafening.
There's the clatter of utensils on flatware, the low din of voices as other patrons go about their meals, an occasional shout or clatter from the kitchen, of course, but it feels as if the three of them have been sucked into a bubble. A tiny vortex of suffocating anxiety and apprehension as Regina waits for Cora's reaction.
When she finally does speak, her voice is cold and hard. "So you're telling me you're gay now? Is that what this place has done to you? Filled your head with ideas, people who foster your delusions, Regina?" She shoots Mal a nasty glare, enough to cut to the bone, but the insult merely rolls off the blonde. "That's what we've been paying for you to learn?"
It stings. More than Regina would care to admit, but it's no worse than she's been expecting her mother's reaction to be. Still, she can't help but try to explain, "Well, not exactly, at least, it's a bit more complicated than that, Mother."
Mal's hand rests on her knee beneath the table, gives her a reassuring squeeze as she tries to find the words to properly explain how she feels in a way Cora will understand. Though everything she comes up with seems to fall short. So she goes with frank honesty. "I'm bisexual. I still like men, but I am attracted to women, too. And I've found someone I care about, who cares about me," her gaze darts to Mal for a moment, met with a reassuring smile that she returns, "who just so happens to be a woman."
Cora scoffs, crossing her arms over her chest and leaning back in her seat as she studies her daughter as if she doesn't recognize her. "Really, Regina. What is this nonsense?"
"It's not nonsense, Mother," Regina counters in annoyance. "It's who I am. I'm trying to be honest with you, all I ask is that you listen to me for once and try to keep an open mind. Don't you want me to be happy?"
The nasty laugh Cora releases stabs Regina in the gut the same as if she'd drilled a knife into her by her own hand, but she swallows around the lump in her throat, fighting back the sting of tears at the back of her eyes and keeps her gaze on mother's. "And you've convinced yourself this is how you'll be happy, Regina? That's ridiculous. I should never have allowed your father to talk me into letting you come out here. It was clearly a mistake."
"This has nothing to do with that, Mother." Regina huffs, irritation rising with each passing second. Why can't her mother understand?
"Doesn't it? You never gave any indication of anything like this before this… woman," Cora scowls, shoots Mal a look that would skewer lesser mortals and accuses, "appeared. She has clearly manipulated you into thinking this way."
Regina gaps in shock, taken aback by the very notion and at a loss for words for a moment at how to respond to that.
Luckily, Mal's been saving her words up it would seem. "With all due respect, Mrs. Mills, I love your daughter. I think she's wonderful and brilliant and has one of the kindest, most resilient hearts of anyone I've ever met. And whether you see it or are too stubborn to notice or care, she's blossomed into herself here. In this place and with these people. Whether you like it or not, that includes me. And I'm not going anywhere. It may not be what you intended for her, but she's happy. And I would think that would be the most important thing for a mother's peace of mind. At least it should be."
Cora's glare burns into the blonde, but Mal simply returns her gaze, never backing down from her and Regina could kiss her for that alone. "Well, I've had just about enough of this treatment." Her eyes shift back to Regina, disappointment and worse, indifference, boring holes into her as she informs her, "I'm leaving. When you've come to your senses again let me know." And with that she rises from her seat and strides elegantly out of the restaurant.
"Well, that could have gone better," Regina sighs, lifting her water glass and guzzling down the cool liquid, hoping it helps calm the rapid beating of her heart.
"I'm sorry, babe. I shouldn't have snapped at her and lost my temper. But I couldn't sit by and let her talk to you that way. She's wrong, and you don't deserve to be treated that way for doing nothing more than being yourself." One hand lifts to brush a lock of hair behind her ear affectionately. "She doesn't deserve you."
Regina shakes her head, "No, no, it's alright. It's sweet that you defended me." Her hand reaches over to lay over Mal's on the table, rubbing her thumb along the outside of her palm. "She doesn't listen, I don't know why I thought this time would be any different."
"Because she's your mom and you want her to accept you for who you are, nothing wrong with that."
She jerks her shoulder, silently acknowledging the truth of that. "I should give Daddy a call. Guess this is a conversation we're going to have over the phone after all. There's no way she won't go home and drop that bombshell on him and I don't want him to find out that way."
Mal nods, signals the waiter for the check (now that Cora has stormed out it seems they'll be paying for the single glass of ice tea she'd ordered before they arrived) and gives Regina's hand a squeeze. "Yeah, but from everything you've told me about him, I think he'll be much more understanding and receptive. He's not going to love you any less, you know that right?"
Tears spring to Regina's eyes but she nods, tries to knuckle a few away as they threaten to fall down her cheeks. "I know. He's wonderful. And he's going to love you, be so happy I've found someone like you, I just wish she could value my happiness and what I want more than her own agenda."
"She'll come around," Mal answers, handing over a single twenty. "And, hey, now you've done it. You were honest and true to yourself and I am so proud of you for it."
Regina's heart swells. Hearing the words, the love reflected back at her in Mal's clear blue eyes, is enough to have the dull throb of heartache at not being accepted by someone who should love her unconditionally lessening a degree. And she's right. It feels good, a weight lifted, to finally be true to who she is and be completely open. "Thank you. That means a lot to me. And thank you for being here with me, for sticking it out through that conversation. I'm not sure I would have had the courage without your support."
"You would have," Mallory assures, but leans forward and busses her lips against Regina's anyway. "You're one of the strongest people I know. But I'm glad I could be there for you. And you're beautiful. Inside and out."
The waiter returns a moment later with her change and as Mal finishes up with the check, Regina gazes out the large glass window of the restaurant. To the bright, sunny day and the colorful spring flowers that are overflowing on the terrace.
"What do you say you go call your father and then you and I find a shady tree on the quad and spend the rest of the day cuddled up together? We can read or nap. Watch the clouds and see what our imaginations can find. Whatever you want."
Regina smiles, standing and holding out her hand for Mal's. "I think that sounds perfect."
A part of her heart might still be heavy, but she's done it. Come out to her parent and surely whatever else there is to face, it can only go up from here. With Mal by her side.