Time frame: After rescue
Rating: T/M for language
Established relationships: Nellis, mentions of Frochelle
Description: An exchange of thoughts between Keith and Ellis, feels between Nick and Ellis, and other random shit.
"Ellis?" His eyes snapped open at the sound of his name.
It was still relatively dark in his room, where he lay curled up against Nick's back. He focused on the room and noted the presence of another man in the room.
"How do, Keith?" He said quietly, voice heavy from sleep.
"Hey buddy." Keith smiled from where he was crouched on the floor.
"How'd ya get in-"
"About that. Sorry I didn't knock. I didn't want to wake Nick up." Keith whispered, keeping his eyes on Ellis' sleeping companion.
"Yeah, he'da been pissed. What time is it?" Ellis asked.
"It's about 6:00 in the am. Come over to my house, will ya? I want to talk things over." Keith offered, "I'll make ya some chicken and waffles."
"You got yourself a deal." Ellis agreed, starting to sit up. "Turn around so I can get some pants on."
Pink flushed over the redhead's cheeks.
"Uhm, I'll wait for you outside, k?"
Ellis slid out of bed once the coast was clear, pulling on his work uniform and leaving Nick a quick note stating where he would be, knowing he'd be confused when he woke up.
Morning. I went over to Keith's. He wanted to talk about some stuff.
Hopefully everything will be okay. I love you, Nick. See you tonight after work.
Ellis
The two men walked a short distance roughly eight blocks away until they reached a mobile home park that looked untouched by the outbreak. They made small talk throughout their walk and kept their voices down when they entered Keith's house.
Immediately inside was a kitchen, followed by a living room farther back. The blond girl Keith made friends with was curled up asleep in the recliner.
"Don't mind her. She sleeps pretty heavy." Keith assured, ignoring Sid and offering Ellis a seat in the kitchen. His other roommate John was already at the stove and waved Keith over to finish up.
"This hot oil keeps splattering on me." He complained.
"Well, no shit. You got the temp up too high." Keith answered, turning the burner down and using a knife to turn over the frying items in the pan.
Nearly 15 minutes of fumbling later, John retired to the back bedroom with his breakfast and Keith was alone with Ellis in the kitchen, sitting down with him to eat and talk.
"Where'd you get ahold of chicken?" Ellis asked.
"Oh, it aint really chicken."
"Tastes like it, though." Ellis shrugged, taking another bite.
"Hey buddy, I want you to know that what happened last night don't change anything between us. I'm real sorry I reacted how I did." Keith started, breaking the ice once he had a mouthful of waffle down. He had to clutch his fork like a weapon on account of the missing knuckles of two important fingers.
"I wish I woulda just told you. I just thought that you wouldn't want to be friends with me afterward and I just got ya back. I wasn't ready to lose you." Ellis explained, embarrassed already at the mention of last night's mishap.
"Nah, nothing you could do would make me stop bein friends with you. I mean, we have been at each other's backs since we were little. I just was really surprised."
"It's not something I planned." Ellis answered honestly.
"Yeah, things happen when the world goes to shit." Keith agreed. "But I'm actually a little bummed that you'd think something like this would drive a wedge between you and me."
"Well, back when we were kids, you seemed like a real tolerant guy, and then just one day you got real distant. You kept tellin me not to do certain things I always did before cause it was gay. Like when we was young, we'd sleep in the same bed all the time, and out of the blue you were like, "Ellis, sleep on the couch. I aint gay." Ellis was remembering these events, not happy about them.
"Yeah. I admit that. I had my own shit goin on, buddy. I had my own crosses to bear." Keith was avoiding eye contact at this realization of his behavior.
"So of course I didn't think you'd understand me being with another guy." Ellis pointed out.
"I mean, I don't understand really. I support you. I want you to be happy. But I don't know what you're doing with Nick. How well do you really know this guy?" Keith was choosing his words carefully at this point, not wanting to anger his friend.
"We are still workin on that. It's like when you first start datin someone and you are slowly learnin all about them."
"Datin?" Keith asked, disbelief in his voice.
"Uh, yah. Nick and me are together. You know I'm not the kinda guy that sleeps around unless I'm with someone." Ellis cleared up as best he could.
"So, you're in a relationship with him? Like he's your boyfriend officially?" Keith was starting to stammer.
"Yeah. I mean we don't really flaunt it to people-"
"Ellis..." Keith started, taking a deep breath. "Look, it aint that he's a man that bothers me."
"Then what is it?" Ellis was defensive over Nick, not allowing any bullshit for a minute.
"I just wanna make sure you aint getting in too deep too fast. I mean does he love you like you love him?"
"Well in his own way-"
"Ellis, has Nick told you that he loves you?" Keith asked point blank.
"No."
"Well shit. Use your head. I mean is this really the guy you wanna commit yourself to? There's lotsa guys around-" Keith started to suggest.
"Do I look like some kinda queer to you? Nick's the only guy I have feelins like this for. I don't know how or why but he's everything I want." Ellis smiled, thinking about Nick.
Keith sighed.
"El, what if this guy aint who he says he is? Do you know anything about the life he had before you? Does Nick have a family? Medical conditions? A criminal history perhaps, cause I'll bet you my remaining thumb he does." Keith was talking faster and faster now.
"Like usual, your ability to pick up on people is right. Nick has been to jail before. I don't know why and I don't know how many times. I don't wanna know." Ellis was sure of himself. He didn't ask Nick about his past crimes because he didn't care what it meant. Deep down under all that misery, he believed Nick was a good guy.
"You don't think you might be part of a grander scheme of things? I mean guys like him, they use people to get what they want. And the guy won't tell ya he loves ya."
"It aint like that. Nick isn't really in touch with his feelings but he aint usin me and I'm not too dumb to see if he were." The younger of the two southerners was trying his best to hold his ground but Keith was right in a sense. Ellis didn't know a whole lot about Nick and Nick still hadn't expressed love toward him.
"Don't be mad. I'm not tryin to start nothin. You're my best friend and I don't want him to hurt you. Trustin the wrong people... it can really mess you up, El. I'm really tryin to look out for you. Please try to see it that way. I love ya, you know we're like family and I just want ya to use your head. Nick doesn't seem like a bad guy, but whether he's the kinda guy that will treat you right, I don't know." Keith kept his voice low, trying to keep the conversation as neutral as possible.
"He coulda left me to die, but he saved my life so many times. I'm only sittin here now cause he was around. He coulda took everything from me, coulda dumped me as soon as we were around women again. But he didn't. So is he using me? No. He's my boyfriend and he aint goin anywhere so you need to keep your thoughts to yourself if you don't want problems with me." Ellis took in another deep breath, now tired.
"He makes me happy, Keith." He said quietly. It was the truest thing he could think to say.
"Well, then that's all that matters. C'mere." Keith stood, pulling his friend to his feet and trapping him in a hug. It was a deep embrace. Ellis could feel his best friend's fingertips on his lower back as scarred arms squeezed about his waist. It was overwhelming, kind and loving. But it didn't stop the ache Ellis felt inside, the truth that stung him and the realization of loving a man he didn't know.
"I love him...with all I am, I love him." Ellis said, tight in the throat.
"Jesus Christ, get a room, buddy." John groaned, coming back into the kitchen to put his plate in the sink. He had a cigarette in his mouth and was shirtless. "You seen my work clothes?"
"Did you try on the floor in my room?" Keith asked, "Ya took a nap in there like you owned the place yesterday."
He came home from work later and immediately walked into Nick's arms.
"You okay?" Nick asked, following the younger man's prompt and hugging him.
"I just missed you today." Ellis answered honestly.
"Yeah? Did you get everything worked out with Stubbs?" Nick asked.
"I cleared up everything. It's gonna be okay between us." Ellis assured his partner.
"You sure? You look a little upset."
"We had a bit of an argument is all. He just don't understand. He don't know you." The southerner defended the man he loved.
"What'd he say?"
"Just that I didn't know you enough to be in love with you, like about your life before me. He was right about that part but I don't care." Ellis started, trying not to make his boyfriend hate his best friend.
"Goddamn it, Ellis. This is where shit starts to get fucking complicated."
"I know. I'm sorry. It's none of my business-"
"Yes it is." Nick interrupted. "It is your business if you want it to be. It's nobody else's business but because you and me are doing this thing together, you have the right to know."
"You don't have to tell me." Ellis assured, holding onto the older man tight.
"I know. It's my choice. But listen. I will tell you literally anything you want to know about me. But you need to make sure you're 100% fucking sure you want to hear the truth before you ask it because I don't want you to hate me." Nick instructed.
"You sure?" Ellis wasn't sure himself. He had the permission, but he wasn't sure he wanted to know all about the guy Nick really was.
"Yeah. I guess it can be that time again, me opening up to someone. I gotta admit it freaks me out." Nick answered, voice heavy.
"Tell me somethin'. Just whatever you choose to tell me first." Ellis coaxed, wanting Nick to be comfortable with what he was sharing.
Nick sucked in a deep breath.
"My real name is actually Nick. I didn't make that up or any of the stuff I told you already. I have been divorced twice. I have no kids, and both of my parents are dead. I was one of five kids and I didn't go to college. I've been arrested six times, and two of them resulted in jail time. Both were felonies. I was in a prison for one stint and county jail for another. I got a reduced sentence in county because I agreed to go to rehab for drug and alcohol abuse. I've done bad things and had bad things done to me. I can't tell you how many times I could have died. I survived the green flu outbreak, and I'm living in this damn zone with nothing much to show for my life, except for my first boyfriend at age 36. His name is Ellis and I love him." Nick finished, heaving out the last heavy breath he'd used to speak.
"What?" Ellis asked, pulling back and looking into the eyes of the man he'd been hugging.
"See? Told you that you didn't want to goddamn know about me." Nick was quickly becoming anxious.
"No, the last part. You said you love me." Ellis smiled.
"Nah, no I didn't. Did I?" Nick gave him a playful shove.
"You did. You said you love me. Do ya really?" Ellis was hanging on the older man's every word.
"Yeah, I love you, Ellis." Nick said quietly, placing a kiss on the younger man's temple. "Now don't go shout it from the rooftops, either, or you'll make me look soft, you little shit."
Ellis' arms tightened around Nick's waist and he buried his face into his partner's neck, the smell of his body wash providing comfort.
"Ellis, goddamn it. You're not gonna cry, are you? Cause if you're about to cry I'm going the fuck outside." Nick warned, hating to deal with tears.
"I aint. It just means a lot that you'd say it."
"Yeah, you grow on me...like a fungus." Nick laughed. "Plus, I felt like if I didn't just come out and say it then I'd be on my way to losing you to your friend."
"Keith? Nah, it aint like that with him." Ellis scoffed.
"Psh, please. His eyes pull your clothes off every time he looks at you." Nick said blatantly.
"No way, you're crazy."
"Sure I am." Nick closed, letting the subject go.
He was a man that noticed things, details as well as the big picture and the way Keith looked at Ellis seemed a lot more than friendly. He wanted Ellis. And just because Nick trusted his partner didn't mean that he trusted the rest of the world. It didn't mean his threat was over. He had to be more careful about the way he treated Ellis because the kid had options.
Nick couldn't see himself ever becoming a romancer like the swarthy Spanish guys in his grandma's romance novels. He was not that kind of guy and he'd venture that it would freak Ellis out just as much. Their outward relationship would probably stay the same. They'd continue to treat each other as bros, continue to sass each other back and forth, and to the outside world they would just be two guys that lived together, maybe even two guys that lived together and had sex. But when it came to the moments they had to themselves, Nick told himself that he needed to put his macho bullshit aside and make sure Ellis felt wanted.
"Let me in, Nick. There's some shady-lookin people out here." Rochelle's voice called from the other side of the front door.
"Thank the fucking cowboys from Hell." Nick made his way across the living room and opened the door, letting his former survival companion inside, locking the door behind her. She wasn't kidding, there were some neckbeard-having dudes talking to each other about MMA outside.
"I picked up your aspirin like you asked." She reminded, passing her friend a jug of pills.
"Rochelle, have I ever told you that you're a wonderful human being and I love you?" Nick patted her back, and then popped open the lid on the Bayer and took two.
"No, but I'll take that as a thank you."
"Oh, it is. I have the worst fucking headache. It's these two idiots everyday lately. I don't know what they're doing in the kitchen but it's so loud and goddamn I can't block it out." the gambler explained, motioning to the mess in the kitchen and the two rednecks positioning containers on the countertop.
"Hey Ro." Ellis called.
"What the hell is going on in there?" she asked.
"We're makin beer." Keith answered.
"It looks like a goddamn meth lab...a real shitty one." Nick noted. "You're not leaving all this shit out. It's making the whole fucking place look like the worst part of Newark."
"C'mon baby, don't be like that." Ellis soothed, standing up and pulling the older man into a hug.
"No, get off me. Unless this is making me some goddamn profits, it's getting thrown out by the end of the night. Goddamn it, Ellis." Nick shooed him away, turning to Rochelle. "You see what I have to live with?"
"I'd have tanned both of their hides by now." She agreed.
"Ro, you been smilin real wide every time I seen you lately. How's things? You and Francis been hanging out?" Ellis asked, ignoring Keith's struggle with some hoses to speak to her.
"Yeah, we're trying things out. No rush. But it's going good." Rochelle smirked.
"Ya get to second base?" Ellis winked.
"A lady doesn't kiss and tell."
"Ha! Might explain why you don't tell me shit about your happily ever after, El." Keith laughed.
"You're a funny sumbitch, you know that?" Ellis replied, giving his friend a playful punch.
"Second base? What are you, twelve?" Nick complained. "Ro, come on. Are you getting any?"
"I'm not telling, Nick. Plus if I was going to, you'd be the last I would tell. You're such a miserable turd."
"I have a reason. Look at them. I swear to god I have 99 goddamn problems and Ellis is easily a quarter of them. Mix the two of them and I have half of my problems right there." Nick pressed on his temple, trying to drive away some of the throbbing that had been present all day.
He was dealing with his jealousy really well on the outside, but he was sure that his blood pressure was paying for it. He'd had headaches a lot in the past and didn't have any way of coping with his stress other than heavy drinking, which bothered his boyfriend. Last time he drank, he was so intoxicated that the two southerners had to crutch him home.
Honestly he didn't have a problem with the two of them spending time together. He didn't have a problem with Keith. He was honestly easier to deal with than Ellis, much quieter when he was alone. The two of them together were like a hurricane, though. It was usually Ellis and his shitty ideas that were behind Keith maiming himself. He could deal with them. As long as he wasn't picking up on lingering hands or inappropriate affection, he felt that he probably didn't have anything to bitch about.
Even if he did, he wasn't going to act like it bothered him. That was something his first wife used to do. If he was talking to a woman, his wife would get jealous and throw herself all over him in front of the woman he was talking to. It was pathetic and embarrassing.
"Nick?" Ellis asked, snuggling closer to the gambler as they laid on the couch together watching old sitcoms on the TV.
"What?"
"Do you ever think about Heaven?" Ellis wondered.
"What do you mean? Like do I believe in it?"
"Yeah, that and do you think if there is one, guys like you and me will get to go? Or do ya think those angry religious people on TV might be right about us burning in Hell?" His voice sounded afraid.
"I guess I never paid it any thought. I don't really see it as a logical concept, Heaven. And let's just put it this way, if there is a God and all that, me fucking another man is not going to be the tie breaker that prevents me from salvation." Nick reasoned.
"Yeah, I guess you're right."
"Plus, there's no way no Eye in the Sky is gonna tell me I was better off with my ex-wife than you just because she was a woman." Nick scoffed.
"You don't talk about her much. What was she like?"
"The first wife...I married her when I was 21. You ever see the movie Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?" Nick asked, beginning one of his journeys he would take Ellis on into the past.
"Yeah."
"Well, you know Everett's wife?" He waited for a nod, "Well, imagine a loud ass bitch version of her. Add expensive tastes and a push up bra and that was my first wife."
"Really? She sounds kinda mean."
"Hey, I was no walk in the park. But at least, at the very least I kept my dick in my pants while I was with her. But then, she decides she's gonna bitch me out over how I made money. It didn't stop her from spending it, but suddenly she had a problem with the source because she felt guilty lying to her family about me and my "not-insurance-salesman job." Nick continued.
"What happened with her? You told me about the other woman, but what ended it with the first one?" Ellis asked. He always listened so intently to anything Nick said.
"She divorced me when I went to prison. We were married for two years. I mean, I can't blame her. I was sentenced to 8 years in the penn. I couldn't expect her to wait for me. I was only ever mad when I found out she was with another guy 6 months before-"
"Wait, you did 8 years in prison?" Ellis asked, trying to do the math.
"No, that was just the original sentence. I got an appeal and my sentence was dropped from attempted murder to aggravated assault. I only did 2 years."
"Still, two years is a lot. What'd you do to keep from going nuts?"
"Spent my time getting buff as fuck. I was in good shape when I was young, believe it or not." Nick smiled, remembering how sexy he used to look.
"You're still in pretty good shape. Is prison like people say it is?"
"Yeah. Yeah, it is. Not easy at all. My first week there I didn't sleep. Luckily some older guys gave me protection. Seriously, shiv your first skinhead and people quit giving you shit so much."
"Nick, you ever kill anybody? Like besides infected?" Ellis regretted asking the second he did.
"Why, kid? Why is that the next logical thing to ask me? Tell ya what, go to sleep, then in the morning give this question some thought, and if you still want to know in the morning, I'll tell you. K?"
"Okay, but...even if you did, I love you."
**Note: Wow, getting close to 300 views. That's a pretty big deal. Also, I accept chapter/drabble prompts, so if any of you have ideas regarding what you want to see in future chapters, shoot me a PM or review.