Chapter 31: Taffisitting
Naka-Chan, Idol of the fleet let out a resigned sigh. Most fleet girls viewed computers as little more than frustrating boxes of magic. Naka used to think that way as well, but she'd seen first-hand how radar had changed the course of war at sea. She was fascinated by the new technology, and the new potentials that it brought her. At first, she'd borrowed a yeoman's laptop, recording her first few songs on a webcam and editing them with plenty of help.
And then, she'd stumbled upon the magic of PC gaming, and she was hooked. Between her military stipend and the royalties from her songs, Naka had quietly been accumulating a modest sum. A sum she'd spend on building a truly monstrous gaming rig.
Two top-of-the-line Titan X graphics cards, a liquid-cooled i7 processor, thirty-two gigabytes of rapid-access memory, all sitting in a custom-built machined-steel case with multi-colored LED lighting. Naka'd spent almost five thousand dollars on her machine—not including the games she'd bought for it. She was reasonably sure it was the most powerful gaming computer in all of Yokosuka. If not all of Japan.
And the taffies… were using it… to play pong. Not any of the thousands of updated releases, either. The original monocrome atari game.
"This is amazing!" Johnston stared at the screen and almost vibrated out of her seat as her paddle sent the cubic pixel "ball" flying past Hoel's paddle.
"Naka!" Said Hoel, "Naka Naka Naka! Lookit!" the girl didn't seem the least bit upset that she was loosing nine-to-two. Her smile threatened to leap off her face as she waved the USB controller at Naka's face.
"I move the thing-" hoel flicked an analog stick with her thumb. "AND THE THING MOVES!" She fell over in excitement as her paddle darted across the screen. "THIS IS AMAZING!"
"I LOVE THE FUTURE!" screamed Johnston with all the volume her little lungs could muster.
"NAKA!" Hoel stared at Naka with utter amazement writ large on her smiling face, "NakaNakaNaka! Have you ever seen something so amazing!"
Naka sighed. Her head fell against her hand in the resigned facepalm she'd gotten so good at after just a few hours watching the taffies. Her minifringe was just a few feet away… she should still have a few fifths left…
"Hai," she said, slipping back into her cutsey sweet-faced smile. She was looking after these girls, and Naka-Chan would never back down from her duty! "It's my system you know."
Hoel opened her mouth to argue, then closed it again with a shrug.
"I LOVE THE FUTURE!" bellowed Johnston. She planted one shoe on her prostrate sister's chest and mimed driving a flag into the other destroyer. "I LOVE THE FUTURE BECAUSE I BEAT HOEL AT-" she turned to Naka, her voice suddenly very calm and… not quiet, but less thunderously loud, "what's this?"
"Pong."
"I BEAT HOEL AT PONG!" Johnston thrust her hand into the air, her feathers quivering from the wake.
"Hey, Naka?" Heermann wandered in with a glass full of milk in one hand an a pile of DVDs in the other. "Can we watch spongebob?"
Naka smiled. She had yet to meet a destroyer who didn't enjoy spongebob. Normally, it was a safe bet to keep the girls entertained for hours on end while she gamed or streamed. But… there was very little about the taffies that was normal. Naka could sense the wind changing. She would regret it if she said yes.. she just knew it..
"Pleeeeeeease?" Johnston, Hoel, and Heermann clustered around Naka. They stared up at her with the one weapon more potent than an Oxygen Torpedo. The pleading-destroyer-eyes.
Naka blinked. "Fine," she said, hearding the destroyers towards her couch, "But be nice." This was so going to bite her in the ass.
Jersey blinked. The briefing with her Admiral had concluded mere minutes—no, mere seconds—ago. Yet somehow she was already half way out of the administration building with a giggling, bouncing Japanese fast battleship beaming right in her face. Somehow, the decaf was to blame.
And then it got weirder. "You're sleeping with us, Dess!" Kongou smiled even wider as she bounced down the hall. Yes, bounced. Like some kind of hyperactive bunny rabbit.
Jersey gulped. It wasn't that the Japanese girl wasn't attractive. And that airy, unsupportive little miko outfit certainly wasn't hurting… things. But Jersey- Jersey really wasn't going to go down that line of thinking! "Uh… Kongou?"
"Oh," Kongou let out a playful giggle, "Not like that, Dess. Kongou's bed is reserved for Tei~to~ku!" She flashed the kind of toying smile that made Jersey certain there was some kind of plan happening in the shadows to get him in that bed.
"Okay…" Jersey swerved around a passing sailor, accidentally smacking him in the face with the end of her braid. "You lost me."
Kongou beamed. "Hiei and Haruna are down at Sasebo," she said, bouncing happily onto the concrete sidewalk, "They don't want their room going to waste, dess!"
"Wait," Jersey broke out into a trot to keep up with the hyper energetic Japanese battleship, "You mean you're- they're lending me their room?"
Kongou smiled, the lone tuft of hair on her head bobbing in the affirmative.
"You…" Jersey felt her cheeks blush, "You didn't have do all that for me."
"It's no problem, dess!" Kongou giggled, tugging Jersey by the wrist as she bounced towards what must be the battleship dormitory. "Besides, it's the Christmas Spirit, Dess!"
Jersey blinked. "It's December Second."
"Christ~mas!" Said Kongou with another of her bouncy giggles.
For a brief moment, Jersey found herself contemplating what Kongou'd look like in a skimpy santa dress. Not fantasizing, mind you. She was no lewdboat like Johnston. She was just… contemplating. She was built as a flagship after all. It was in her nature to plan for the future. In any case, Jersey's ruminations were cut short when her forehead collided with a rouge door frame with a loud metal-on-metal clank.
"Fuck!" Jersey slapped her hand to her brow, giving the dented door frame a scathing look. "The hell?"
Kongou giggled. "Be careful, American, Dess!"
"What's being 'merican got to do with it?" scowled Jersey, rubbing her brow as she carefully ducked under the damaged lintel.
"You grow big and tall," said Kongou, "Not like us. Japanese girls are kawaii and compact!"
"You're British," deadpanned Jersey.
"Dess!"
Jersey sighed, letting her hands fall to her hips. Just trying to comprehend Kongou was breaking her sense of… everything, really. She felt reality slipping though her fingers like water though a net. This must be what being an Admiral is like…
"C'mon, follow me!" cheered Kongou, waving one billowing sleeve as she skipped down the carpeted hall. She passed one door that had "Kongou & Kirishima" lovingly hand-written on it with lots of little hearts and stopped at another. Another door where "USS New Jersey" was written in English block letters that alternated between red, white, and blue.
Jersey blushed. "You girls didn't have to-"
Kongou silenced her with a wave. "Kirishima-chan, she's here!"
The door swung open and the youngest of the Kongou stepped out with a restrained smile on her face. Restrained for a Kongou, which meant it was just one step dimmer than staring directly into the sun. "Jersey-san," the battleship dipped her head in a demure little bow as she stepped aside, "I hope you like what we've done."
"You know, you didn't have to- woah!" Jersey suddenly felt herself being bodily shoved into the room. Kongou was pushing from behind, and Kirishima grabbed the American's arms and towed her into-
Into what was quite possibly the most American room Jersey had ever seen. One entire wall was covered by a hanging 48 star flag, and framed pictures of bald eagles and jet fighters adorned the others. Even her bedspread was a a flag, and the red and blue pillows scattered around the room were each emblazoned with a single embroidered star.
"Holy hannah," breathed Jersey, shuffling deeper into the room. The soft carpet felt amazing even though her shoes… she could only imagine what it would be like to walk around barefoot. "All this…"
"For you," said Kongou, bouncing with uncontrollable glee.
"Do you like it?" said Kirishima.
Jersey stared out the window, determined not to let the Japanese girls see her cry. "You… you really didn't have to."
"We wanted do," said Kirishima, pulling up abreast of Jersey and handing her a tissue. "It's the Christmas spirit."
Jersey laughed, dabbing at the wetness that was most assuredly not forming around her eyes. "It's… December fucking second."
"Christ~mas~" giggled both Kongou-class battleships in harmony.
Jersey shook her head. What was it with these Japanese boats and pronouncing tildes… that shouldn't even be possible. And come to think of it… how did she know they were pronouncing tildes? Oh well, she'd deal with that another time.
"Hey, uh…" Jersey turned to face both sisters, her hands sliding into her pockets as she settled her stern down on the windowsill. "You wouldn't happen to know a good model shop in the area, would you?"
Kongou smiled. "Are you looking for Pre~sents?" she said, putting such bouncy inflection on the last word that it sounded like Christmas. "Presents for your teitoku?"
"What?" said Jersey, the muscles in her neck going taut for the briefest of instants. "No, nothing like that… I just got a few friends back home. Want to bring them something."
"I'll help!" Kirishima quite literally leaped in front of Kongou, heading off her older sister's words before they could even leave her mouth. "I would like to help Jersey-san."
Kongou glanced at the two battleships and shrugged. "Okay!" she flashed a thumbs up so enthusiastic Jersey swore she heard the girl's billowing sleeves crack like whips. She spun on her heel without another word, giggling to herself as she half-walked half-bounced away to whatever was next on her warped itinerary.
Kirishima smiled as her sister bounced away. "She's so nice, isn't she?"
Jersey nodded in agreement. "You could say that again."
"So… you wanted models?"
"Mm," Jersey nodded, fussing with her scarf to make sure it sat just so.
"I know just the place!" said Kirishima, her glasses glinting in the midday sun filtering though the half-open window. Her smile wasn't nearly as luminescent as Kongou's, but the girl was still clearly happy. "Um, Jersey-san?"
"Jersey," corrected the American. "I get enough of that -san-chan-sempai bullshit from the destroyers."
Kirishima nodded, making a small note in a notebook that was suddenly in her hands. "Jersey. I was wondering…" the girl stopped, her creamy complexion going red.
"Yeah?"
"I was wondering… how much do you know about Washington-sama?"