Guardian
A/N: For those that have been following this story since the beginning, you might have noticed it's been a years since the last update. While I've been busy with a multitude of things, I decided at the start of 2015 that I wanted to finish Guardian this year. After all, it seemed rather mean to leave the ohana hanging in the middle of things. While I won't promise speedy updates, the plan is to wrap this up before getting back to focusing on my other writing. Wish me luck.
On that note, in order to avoid a ton of repetition, there will be small time jumps (at this point pieces of days, not entire days).
Anyway, on with the story!
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters and make no money doing this. I'm just having fun playing with them.
Chapter 49
Putting up the last breakfast dish, Grace turned to give Steve a high five. "Done!" The Seal grinned down at her. When he'd insisted on handling clean up, she'd been equally insistent that she would help.
"Now what?" Heading toward living room, he swung her up into his arms. Part of him wondered how much longer she would let him carry her around. He already knew she would outgrow this phase long before he was ready. Passing the front door, he caught the sound of car doors slamming shut. "Sounds like the others are here."
"Can we go meet them?" Not bothering to answer, he veered toward the door. Catching Danny's eye, he gave a quick smile before heading outside.
"Morning brah!" Chin called when he saw them.
"Hi Uncle Chin." Grace reached over, giving him a welcoming hug as he met them on the walkway. Steve's eyes met the older mans, giving a small smile and nod at the silent question he saw there.
"We just finished cleaning up from breakfast." The Seal wrapped his free arm loosely around Kono in a brief hug as she and Catherine appeared beside them.
"Knew we should have gotten here earlier." Chin faked a pout as they turn toward the door.
"Don't let them hear you say that or they'll start cooking again." Steve laughed as he teasingly reprimanded the Hawaiian.
"I don't doubt that." Conceding, Chin held the door open for the others to head into the house. "Is there a plan for today?" He asked Grace and Steve as he followed them through the door.
"Dr. James this evening, but nothing specific until then." While the original plan had been for Chin and Kono to head to the Five-0 headquarters for at least part of the day, the disruption following the funeral had the governor adamant that they wait until the following week to return.
"A quiet day at Casa de McGarrett sounds fine with me." Kono grinned.
In the end, a quiet day is exactly what they had. Grace seemed somber, not unexpected the day following her mother's funeral, so the ohana did their best to let her set the pace for the day. Before they knew it, it was time for Grace, Danny, and Steve to head to Dr. James's and for Chin and Dianne to go shopping.
"The taco soup is in the slow cooker, so there will be food ready when you get back home." Beth reminded them, giving Steve a tight hug as they headed toward the door.
"Thanks ma. We'll be back in a bit."
Pulling into the parking lot, Steve was relieved to see it was mostly empty. After the crowd yesterday at the funeral, he wasn't sure how Grace would handle an unexpected group of strangers here. Familiar with the security measures at the therapist's office, both men were slightly less keyed up than they were heading into the previous visit.
"Welcome back." Dr. James greeted them as soon as they walked through the door. Just like before, she stepped around them and secured the lock on the door. "Two of the other doctors are finishing up some paperwork in their offices, but they'll relock the door when they leave." Both men nodded as she shifted her focus to her patient. "Hi Grace."
"Hi." The little girl returned her greeting, accepting the hand the doctor extended to her. The doctor and Grace leading the way, they headed through the interior door to the same area where they'd sat at the last appointment.
"Grace, if it's okay with you, I'd like for the two of us to talk first today. Then I'll talk to your dads, and then, if any of us think we need to, the four of us can sit down for a bit together again. Does that sound okay to you?"
"Yes ma'am." Grace nodded, giving a small smile.
"Okay. We can either stay in here," she gestured to the tables and chairs around the room, "or we can go into my office." She pointed to an open door just down the hallway, giving Grace the option to decide where she would be most comfortable.
"Here." While the little girl knew she'd eventually have to meet with Dr. James in her actual office, there was something about this room that helped her relax a bit.
"Alright." Angling to face Steve and Danny, she prepared to send them off to the room they'd waited in before.
"We remember where it is." Danny spoke before she could ask. Before heading down the hall, both men gave Grace a kiss on the head and a quick hug.
Settling into the same couch as before, it was some time before either of them spoke.
"What if we aren't handling this right?" The detective's voice broke the silence, the words spoken in a rush of air.
McGarrett shifted, sitting sideways on the couch to face his partner. Reaching for one of Danny's hands, he squeezed it gently. "Grace losing her mother is wrong, no matter how we look at it, so I'm not sure there is an absolute right way to handle it. Are there specific things you're worried about?" Steve schooled his features, not wanting to show the fear he felt. What if Danny was deciding he wasn't what Grace needed right now.
Steve felt the pressure of Danny's fingers wrapped around his increasing for a brief second and looked down to their hands. "Not this, and not you with Grace. Those have both been a long time coming and if anything are helping her feel more secure in her new home environment." The Seal looked back into his partner's eyes. "Don't give me that look. I know you, and I know the first thing you always think is that somehow you are at fault. You aren't. At least not this time, so calm down."
"Thanks." The word was only a whisper, but he knew Danno heard it. "Honestly, I've thought the same thing. She seems so calm most of the time, going through as if things are normal. It's like she's really only letting it out in short bursts."
"Can't imagine where she picked that habit up from. Ma swears I was the same way. If anything bad happened, I would throw myself into whatever else I had going on to keep the bad from drowning me. Then I would process in bits and pieces either as I felt ready or as I was forced to."
"I suppose we should talk to Dr. James about it. She's dealt with situations like this far more than we have."
"True." Danny let himself lean into the larger man a she closed his eyes, hoping that everything they were doing for Grace was helping her and not making it harder to cope with the loss of her mother.
They remained in silence, Steve's arm wrapped supportively around Danny's shoulders as they waited for Dr. James to join them. When she finally did, the Seal didn't miss the smile that flitted across her face when she saw them.
"How is she?" He didn't wait for her to take a seat before asking.
"She is a remarkable strong little girl." Both men level her with a 'tell us something we don't know' look, prompting her to continue. "She filled me in on everything that's happened since Saturday. I know you won't want to leave her alone for long, so I'll run through my comments and then we can address any remaining questions or concerns the two of you have."
The pair nodded their assent to her recommendation.
"The situation with Ms. Bradley seems to have been handled better than anyone could have hoped. I don't know if Governor Denning realizes just how big of an impact he made with his actions, but I can tell you they likely made the difference between pushing her recovering several steps ahead and sending her spiraling backward indefinitely."
"Trust us. We are all beyond grateful for his support." Danny acknowledged.
"Grace does have some concerns about her departure on Saturday. She understands it is necessary for Ms. Bradley to go back to her home, but is worried things will return to the way they were. From what she said, you have done a great job at trying to overcome those concerns. I gather by the time you get home she'll be ready to start video chatting."
"Yes, ma'am."
"I might suggest letting them practice before Ms. Bradley leaves. Seeing that things really are set up to be able to talk may offer a bit more surety for her." The men nodded at her suggestion, readily agreeing. "You may also want to talk to Ms. Bradley when Grace is not around and see if she has an idea of when she will plan to return. Even if she doesn't yet, you might encourage her to pick a date soon so that Grace has something a bit more concrete to hang onto."
"We can do that. I want to get a calendar for the kitchen anyway to help us keep track of important dates and appointments, so we could add her visits where Grace can see them." Steve responded. With just him he'd never bothered with a calendar, but with three of them in the house he wanted a way to ensure they all knew about any important events.
"That would be good." The therapist encouraged the idea. "Now, it sounds like yesterday was a rather trying day. Grace was definitely rattled by the unexpected confrontation, but what really stood out to me was where her focus was when telling the story. She didn't fixate on the man yelling or banging on the door, though those did scare her. The pieces she focused on where how fast you reacted, how her entire family worked together to fix it, and even the behavior of the HPD officers that were trying to protect you all. To her it seems to have reinforced the idea that while bad things may happen, she isn't alone to deal with them."
The room fell silent for a long moment as Danny and Steve processed what the doctor said.
"She told me about your conversation immediately following the attack. You know she's right Commander. You can't prevent everything, but your handling of the situation shows a great deal about how much you care about your family. As for Grace, with the presence of mind to think like that at her age in such a situation, she'd make a fine therapist some day."
The guys smiled rather proudly. Neither of them would admit that living around them, she was likely to get plenty of practice with those skills.
"As best I can tell from Grace, you are both doing everything you can to help her process her grief and find ways to settle into this new version of her life. I definitely want to keep up the twice weekly sessions as long as they are proving beneficial. I imagine in a few week she will probably be okay to transition to once a week, but at any time if you or Grace feel I can help with something, you have my number and I expect you to use it. I'm sure you intend to, but I also strongly encourage you to keep up with her self defense training. The trauma of this entire situation is seated as much in seeing her mother as a victim to a violent crime and feeling like a victim itself as it is in the pain of losing her mother."
"Believe me, we have no intention of stopping that." Danny confirmed.
"As for how she is doing with the loss. Based on our conversations, it appears she processed a lot of the situation while locked in the bathroom. The loss will continue to hit her at various times, much as I gather it has with the picture and such up to now, but right now the best thing you can do is what you already are. Letting her make choices about her room is helping her gain a sense of permanence with the new living arrangements. Surrounding her with the people that love her and are willing to provide a stable and supportive environment is huge. Often one of the hardest parts of losing a parent young is the loss of that unconditional love and acceptance, but for Grace it sounds like she viewed the two of you and your team as her biggest source of that. While she loved her mother, she also felt like she was often in the way and more of a burden than she should have been."
Steve felt Danny's fist clench against his leg. Hearing Grace believed something he suspected of his own mother broke his heart. He could only imagine how furious it made Danny.
"I know I've said quite a bit already. Is there anything else you two want to talk about before we rejoin Grace."
"We were going to ask if you felt we were handling the situation correctly or if there are things we should do differently. I know you addressed some of that already."
"Honestly Commander, I wish I had more parents like the two of you. You are both doing remarkably well given the circumstances. Just keep paying attention to how she reacts to things. She'll need your encouragement to get herself ready to face going back to school and finding a new routine. Try to give her chunks of time with the other members of the ohana, people she trusts, but without either of you present. While it is normal and perfectly healthy for her to want to be close to both of you right now, you don't want to her to become too dependent on your presence to feel secure in her world."
"That makes sense." Danny agreed. As much as he'd love to stay glued to her side, he knew his responsibility as her father was to ensure she grew up as strong and independent as he'd always hoped she would.
"One other thing, with Ms. Bradley leaving on Sunday, would the two of you be open to having she and your mother," she motioned to Danny, "join us for the Saturday session. I think it might do Grace and Ms. Bradley both some good to feel like they have a plan and support before her departure."
Steve glanced down at Danny before answering. "Yes. We'll ask them to come with us."
"Excellent. Now why don't we go check in on Grace. I don't think there is anything else that needs attention today, so unless you have additional concerns, I think you are free to go enjoy your dinner."
"Thank you." Danny and Steve replied in unison even as they were halfway to the door, headed for Grace.
Approaching the room, they spotted her putting the finishing touches on a drawing of what appeared to be her between the two of them, standing on the beach facing the water. "You're becoming quite the artist there, Gracie." Steve spoke quietly hoping not to startle her.
"Thanks Daddy." She smiled up at him.
"You ready to go home, Monkey?" Danny asked from beside his partner.
"I'll see you three and your grandmas in a few days Grace. You guys call me if you need anything." Dr. James offered as she watched her young patient swing into Commander McGarrett's arms. If her other patients had a fraction of the support this little girl did, they'd all be far better off.
/ GUARDIAN /
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