Guardian
A/N: For those that didn't get the psychology reference in the previous chapter, just look up operant conditioning. The reference wasn't planned, but I realized what Steve was doing as soon as I wrote it, and couldn't resist letting Danny call him on it.
In other fun news, while Guardian will eventually come to a close sometime after Paul's arrival, I'm ending up with an ever growing set of notes for one shots that will follow. I think once this story wraps, I'll open up a new story where all of those can go to live.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters and make no money doing this. I'm just having fun playing with them.
Chapter 55
Double checking that the doors were locked, Danny and Steve headed up the stairs. Catherine, Kono, and Dianne would be back around eight thirty in the morning for breakfast before all the women headed to the spa. Chin said he was going to go take care of a few other things but would be back in time to say goodbye to Mary before she had to head to the airport.
For now though, the house was settling in for the night. Mary had gone up with Grace about twenty minutes before to read and tuck her in for the night, and Beth had gone up just before the two of them. Reaching the top of the stairs, they saw Mary slipping quietly out of Grace's room.
Stopping when she saw them, Mary smiled. "She's out cold."
"That's good." Steve turned to his partner. "You head on in to bed. I need to talk to Mary for a minute." Steve gave Danny a quick kiss at their door before stepping across the hall to where his sister stood. "Do you have a few minutes?"
"Of course." Mary mumbled quietly. The two had not had a chance to speak alone all afternoon, and she was a bit nervous about the conversation. No matter what everyone else had said, no matter what he had said in the living room, she worried that Steve really was not so enthused about having his baby sister move back underfoot.
Wrapping an arm around her, Steve led Mary back down the stairs. Heading to the kitchen, he pointed her to a seat the at the island, grabbed two beers from the fridge, and settled in next to her.
"Mary, what's wrong? You don't look happy. Do you not want to move back here?" Steve worried that she felt forced into the decision.
She took a slow drink and then stared at the bottle. "No. I do want to move back. I've wanted to move back home since you got back, but …" She let the sentence fall, opting not to finish the sentence.
"But what?" Steve pressed.
"I don't want to get in the way. Things may be a bit crazy right now, but I haven't seen you this happy in years. You have this whole family around you. You've got Danny now. I don't want to get in the way and mess it up for you. You deserve to be happy. I can't even get a decent job. You and your team and Catherine are all busy saving the world, and I'm nothing but a waitress." She took another drink.
"Mary Ann, didn't we have this conversation earlier?" He turned to face her. "Have you heard anything today that gave you any indication that I don't want you here?"
"No." She admitted grudgingly.
"Exactly. Hell, everyone here has had to listen to me bitch for months that I didn't know how I was going to convince you to leave your life in LA behind to come back here. You are right. By some miracle, I have managed to become a part of this rather unexpected family, but I can promise you that for all some of them don't know you very well, they all view you as family too." He paused, hoping the words were really sinking in at last. "As for you being nothing but a waitress, you know that's complete bull. You're a smart woman. You just need a chance to do something else. You've got two weeks while you're wrapping stuff up in LA to decide what you want to do. I hope you actually take that time to think about where you would like your life to be in a few years. Between all of us, we've got enough connections to help you get in the door all kinds of things. If you want to go back to school and learn how to do something brand new, then we'll make that happen. You figure out what it is that you want to do and either tell me what you need from me to make it happen, or tell me what it is and we'll come up with a plan together."
Mary just stared back at her brother. The idea of actually being able to pursue something she enjoyed was exciting and terrifying all at the same time. "I looked at becoming a certified nursing assistant a while back, but I couldn't swing the tuition and rent plus fit in studying with two jobs." She finally admitted. Eventually she wanted to go further than that, but it seemed like a solid step in the right direction.
"Well, rent just became a non-issue, because I can guarantee Danny's parents will have a conniption if you so much as think about paying them anything. If you want to work while you're in school, I'm sure we can find you something that will cooperate with a class schedule. The fall semester is just starting, so by the time you get settled you should be able to apply to attend somewhere in the spring. That gives you time to get settled back in, help Beth and Paul settle in, and get yourself ready for school." Steve rattled off, pleased that she had readily spilled what she wanted to do.
"You're really going to make sure this happens, aren't you?" Mary marveled at him.
"I told you, I'm your big brother. It is well within my rights and responsibilities to help take care of you. If becoming a nursing assistant is what you want to do, then I'm damn sure going to make sure you have a chance to do just that."
Polishing off the last of their beers, both McGarrett siblings rose.
Hesitating at the edge of the kitchen, Mary finally worked up the courage to ask the one question she'd been avoiding for a long time. "What are we going to do if mom shows back up?"
"I don't know. She's made it pretty clear that I can't trust her. I suppose if she made any effort, I would have to let her try, but I am not just going to welcome her back with open arms. I just can't."
"Me either." Mary tucked herself against Steve's side as they headed for the stairs. Though she hated to admit it, she preferred to just keep believing their mother was dead. It was easier than believing she'd abandoned them by choice and then done it again almost as soon as she'd reappeared. "It is nice to have a family again."
"Yeah it is." Steve pulled her into a tight hug when they reached his bedroom door. "Get some sleep, sis. I love you."
"Love you too."
Steve watched as she headed toward her bedroom, waiting until the door was shut securely behind her before he turned to his own bedroom.
"You two get things settled?" Danny asked as soon as the door shut.
"I think so. Sounds like she's going to try to go back to school to become a nursing assistant in the spring." Steve stripped his shirt off, preparing himself for bed. "She sounded so excited about the prospect of getting to do it."
"I assume by the time she gets back we'll have a collection of information for any local CNA programs for her." Danny grinned at him. "I'm glad she's getting a second chance. She deserves it. And I can already tell my parents are over the moon with excitement over the prospects of having a kid at home again, even if she is full grown."
Steve crawled in bed beside Danny. "It'll be good for all of them I think."
"Yeah it will." The detective rolled over, resting his head on Steve's chest.
"So, you going to tell me what was bothering you earlier?" The SEAL ran his fingers through Danny's hair, trying to help take the edge off whatever was bothering him.
"Should have known it was too much to ask for you to forget about that." Danny teased, but felt guilty when Steve's hand froze. "Hey. I'm just kidding. It wasn't anything earth shatter, it just dawned on me that somehow I'm going to have to find a way to keep the memory of Rachel alive for Grace. You know how things were between she and I, which is making it really challenging for me to remember details of the good times to share with Grace. I'm afraid by the time she's ready to talk about her mom, I won't be able to remember any of it."
The pair fell silent for several minutes. Danny's confession had them both thinking.
"Well, we know Dianne has some stories to tell of Rachel from the time before you were married. Maybe we should see if she has some pictures or anything that we could get copies of to hang onto for Grace." Steve suggested. "Kono mentioned there were some photo albums that they included in one of the boxes in the garage. It sounded like there were quite a few pictures of Grace and Rachel together from their time with Stan. Fortunately, he must have been the one behind the camera because Kono said he wasn't in the pictures. Still, we might want to wait a while to break those out, since they will likely remind her both of them."
"Good to know those exist though." Danny was slightly comforted to know that things like that existed.
"So that leaves the period from while you and Rachel were married. I have a hard time believing that not a single picture or video exists from that period." Steve knew Danny loved to capture special moments. "What happened to all of them after the divorce?"
"Mom." Danny let out a small laugh with the word.
"Mom?"
"Yes. Rachel didn't want any of them. She was in such a snit when she left me that I think she was going to destroy them all. Fortunately, Mom and Dad were helping me move out. She knew I wasn't going to want the reminders of my failed marriage staring me in the face, so she took them home with her. At the time she said something about keeping them safe for when Grace was older, so I have no doubt that somewhere in the boxes that will soon be headed here from the mainland, there is an entire box full of memories from the early days."
"That's fantastic." Steve declared.
"Babe, you realize there are pictures of Rachel and me together in that box, right? Probably videos with the two of us looking stupidly happy because I'm pretty sure for at least some period of time we actually were." Danny cautioned.
"And Gracie needs to see that. She needs to remember that despite what happened later, she came into this world with two parents that loved each other and loved her. I will never begrudge you the time and love you gave to Rachel. Those things are ultimately what brought you to me, and those are things that Grace will need help remembering when her memories of Rachel start to fade." Steve stared down into Danny's blue eyes, willing him to understand that he would never try to make him feel bad for needing to acknowledge that part of his past.
"I swear by all that is holy, sometimes I don't understand how you can be the same man that dangles suspects off roofs and puts them in shark cages." Danny gave Steve a quick kiss before slipping out of bed and disappearing into bathroom to grab some ibuprofen for his slight headache. Reassured and feeling better that Grace wouldn't grow up with nothing good to remember, he was ready to lighten the mood.
"Easy. Those suspects were nothing more than a source of information to me." Steve retorted, sliding further into the bed.
"Ah. I see. So as a source of sex, I am accorded higher level of consideration." Danny continued to tease as he opened the bottle of pills.
Steve scrambled out of bed. "What? How can …. Is that … Danny. No." He stood in the door to the bathroom, startling Danny with his hasty appearance.
"Down boy. I'm just kidding." Danny approached him, hands out in front of him as if Steve were a skittish dog that might run. He'd honestly been joking, and had never thought Steve might react this way. He was beginning to realize he needed to get a leash on his mouth. He wasn't used to the more open and emotionally available version of Steve quite yet. Which also made him wonder how many cracks he'd made since they'd met that Steve had just taken and buried. "Steven, listen to me. You have to know I wasn't serious."
"I know." The SEAL's voice was less than convincing, the expression in his eyes even less so.
"You say that, but I can tell you aren't convinced. Babe, you know I tend to run my mouth. I joke, sometimes without thinking, but it doesn't mean that's what I think. I'm sorry I said that. While I will admit that sex with you is pretty damned fantastic you are much more than that to me, and I know full well that I am more than that to you." He dry swallowed the pills in his hand and stepped closer to his partner.
Steve stood his ground. "So what exactly am I to you?"
"The love of my life?" Danny took another step forward.
"Are you asking me or telling me?" Steve pushed.
"Telling." Danny nodded his head. "Yes. Definitely telling." He closed the last step between them, wrapping his arms tight around Steve's waist, sighing in relief when he felt the other man's strong arms wrap around him.
"Come on, Danno. Let's get some sleep."
/ GUARDIAN /
A/N: And so Danny's mouth almost gets him into trouble again. Sometime in the next couple of chapter it will be Steve's mouth that gets him into trouble, but for an entirely different set of reasons ;) As a teaser, go to pinterest and look at /pin/130393351688160563/.
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