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chapter 18

Dean knocked gently on the motel room door. He had called Sam and Sam told him what motel he had brought Castiel and Amber to. Dean was feeling much better since Pestilence's disappearance, and he was hoping the others were the same.

Sam opened the door, looking healthier then he had in Pestilence's experiment building. Dean held up the ring, smiling,but Sam's grim look quickly ruined his happy mood. His had dropped to his side, tightly clutching the ring inside his fist.

"What happened? What's wrong?" Fear deepened in the pit of Dean's stomach as Sam's brows drew together.

Sam gestured inside with a worried look. "It's Cass...he's not better like the rest of us."

Dean hurriedly stuffed the ring back into his pocket and pushed past Sam, anxious to get a look at the angel. Sam had tucked Castiel into one of the motel beds, but he was shivering uncontrollably, his eyes closed. Amber was sitting beside him in a chair next to the bed, looking scared. She stood when she saw Dean and moved to join Sam, who led her away to give the hunter and his mate some privacy.

Dean sat on the bed and Castiel opened his eyes at the sudden weight on the mattress. His dull eyes brightened a bit at the sight of Dean; obviously Sam had told him that Dean was coming. Dean reached out a hand and cupped Cass' cheek gently. "Why aren't you better?"

Castiel shook his head tiredly. "I don't know. Maybe Pestilence gave me something permanent. He wanted to experiment with me to find a disease to spread to the angels."

Castiel coughed and blood spotted his lips. Dean bit his lip, taking a deep breath. Dean put a hand under Castiel's neck and pulled his weak form up, embracing him tightly.

"Cass. What did he do to you." Dean murmured, pressing his face into the angel's shoulder.

" I might die, Dean. I cannot heal myself. I have already tried." Castiel said quietly, and Dean hugged him tighter, trying to block his mate's pessimistic words.

"You're not gonna die." Dean whispered in his ear. "I'll take care of you. You'll get well."

"What about the other rings?" Castiel responded hoarsely, sounding like he had sand coating his throat.

"I'll keep looking, but we can't go anywhere if you're like this. And we can't leave you alone."

"We need to stop the Apocalypse. You need to find the rings" Castiel said softly. "I can stay with Bobby perhaps."

"No." Dean said automatically. "I need you here with me."

Castiel sighed at Dean's protectiveness and the hunter gave a smirk despite the situation.

"We'll just keep looking for trails and when we find something, and then we'll figure something out." Dean laid Cass back down on the pillows gently. Castiel grasped for his hand and as he coughed again. He was quiet for a moment, squeezing Dean's hand. He closed his eyes before speaking, as though ashamed of what he was about to say.

"Dean, I am...I am afraid." he whispered.

Dean reached out and cupped Castiel's chin with a strong hand, smiling and trying to reassure the angel, although he himself was out of hope at the moment. "Don't be. Everything will turn out fine. I'm here and I'll fix everything."

"What if it doesn't turn out fine? Pestilence is a Horsemen for a reason. If he wanted to kill me, he would have made the sickness un-treatable." Castiel said quietly, resting his hand on the bulge of his belly underneath the blankets. He rubbed the spot for a minute before continuing. "If I die, the baby will also die."

Dean gave Castiel a hard look that quieted him. "Stop it. You are not going to die. Now shut up and relax."

Castiel stared at Dean with a puzzled expression as he stood. "But we must consider-"

Dean raised a hand. "No. I don't want to hear it."

He pulled blankets up further around Castiel. "You will get better, we will defeat Lucifer, and we will raise this kid. Stop being so pessimistic. I'm gonna get some chicken soup and orange juice, They're cure-alls for when you're sick."

Castiel glanced at Dean strangely. He didn't understand how a processed juice product could make him better, but he decided not to argue with Dean.

Dean threw a smile at Castiel before going over to where Amber and Sam were in the tiny kitchen. Dean lost his composure immediately as soon as he turned away from the angel.

"How's Castiel?" Sam asked. Dean sat at the tiny table and put his head in his hands. "Dean?"

"I don't know, Sammy. I don't know what to do for him." Dean felt a small, warm hand on his shoulder and he looked up, startled.

Amber was smiling down at him. "I know he'll be okay as long as you're with him. It's so sweet how you look after Castiel and your brother."

Dean's face hardened at her words. He might be able to protect them in a fight, but how was he supposed to cure some unknown disease?

"What are you still doing here anyway? Don't you have somewhere to go?" From the look on the girl's face, Amber was offended by his tone, but Dean didn't care. He was tired and worried about Castiel and he wanted to talk to his brother alone and try to figure everything out.

Sam stepped in quickly, sensing the friction between the two. "I told her everything that's been going on. About demons, angels, the Apocalypse, and us. She wants to help."

"Sam, no. We don't need some girl to look after while we're hunting."

"First of all, DEAN." Amber flared up, her brown eyes burning and hands on her slender hips. "I am not a girl, I'm a woman. I can take care of myself. Second, I can take care of Castiel while you two search for the rest of the rings."

"Absolutely not." Dean shook his head quickly. "I need to be with him."

"As long as he's here waiting for you, whats the difference? You can't run around and leave him alone, so it would be good for me to stay with him. And I'm studying to be a doctor anyway, so I do know a bit about medicine. I volunteer at a local clinic, so I might even be able to snag some drugs for him."

"No drugs. Who knows what that'll do to the baby?"

"And that's another thing." Amber continued. " Do any of you know anything about taking care of a baby, let alone delivering it?"

Dean paled at that statement. "We don't have to think about that yet. And who says you're going to be with us for that long?"

"I am." Amber said firmly. "Because you need someone to help you. You are trying to save the world, and I may not be able to help with that, but I can least help you."

Sam snickered at Dean's speechlessness, but stopped when Dean glared at him.

"Now, are you going to let me stay?" Amber threw a hard gaze at Dean, which made him cower a bit.

"Maybe..just for a little while." Dean sighed, inwardly cursing himself that he had given up so easily. Amber nodded in satisfaction.

"Now why don't you two rest and I'll go to the store and get some food and such."

"I feel fine. I can come with you, give you a ride," Sam said quickly, and Dean glanced at him. He recognized that sappy look on Sam's face and that soft tone in his voice. Was his brother really falling for this girl, or had it been so long since he had a relationship he was willing to take anyone?

Amber smiled at him, blushing a little. "Yeah, that'll be great, that way I won't have to walk with so many groceries."

Sam's face broke into a genuine smile at Amber's acceptance, and Dean threw him the keys. "Just be careful with the car." he said as Sam took the keys and he and Amber left the room.

Dean placed his head on the table again, eyes closed. He wished things could be simple for once. One day, that's all he asked for. One day with no killings, no worries, and no demons. He sat back up and rubbed his eyes wearily; he did feel tired; he supposed sickness did that to you. Fortunately the Winchesters hadn't been sick very much, but maybe that was why it was worse now, although Sam seemed okay. Dean stood, stretching, and went back to Castiel's bed.

"Hey." Dean lifted the covers and slid in next to the angel, who shivered at the colder air. "That girl, Amber, she's gonna stay a while and help look after you."

Castiel nodded sleepily and moved closer to Dean's warm body. "Then you can look for the rings."

"Yeah." Dean propped himself up on a elbow and used his other hand to brush the hair from Castiel's face. He continued stroking the angel's cheek, and Castiel smiled.

"Dean, I am not afraid anymore when you're beside me."

"Good, then I'll have to stick to you like glue." Dean scooted even closer to the angel, their bodies fitting together perfectly. Castiel rested his head on Dean's chest, and the hunter wrapped an arm around him protectively, stroking his belly. They were both quiet, enjoying each other's closeness until Dean spoke.

"Where do you want to live?" he asked suddenly, and Castiel was quiet, confused.

"What do you mean?"

"When we beat Lucifer. Where should we live?"

Castiel looked troubled. "I don't know. Where can we live? There are so many places."

"We can live anywhere you want. Any city, any state. You can pick."

"What about Sam and Bobby? Will you want to live close to them?"

"Maybe we can get a place near Bobby. He'll like a kid around. If I ever tell him, that is." Dean chuckled nervously. He wasn't sure how Bobby would react to to whole angel mating thing. He was putting off that conversation for as long as he could. He was sure Bobby would understand eventually, but imagining the look on the old guys face if he saw a pregnant Cass in Dean's arms..well he might have a heart attack. Probably best to wait until the baby was born.

Castiel nuzzled into Dean's neck. "Tell me more about about house, Dean, please."

Dean kissed Castiel's forehead. "Sure. We'll have a big house, not too big, but big enough so friends can stay if they want. There will be a big backyard with a big garden for you. We'll kick the neighbor's asses with our flowers, they'll be the biggest in the neighborhood. We can even grow vegetables and stuff if you want. I can put up a swingset and a little jungle gym for the kid, and you can sit in the lawn chair and watch him play while I barbecue on the grill."

"It sounds very nice, Dean." Casiel sighed softly, enthralled with Dean's description.

"It'll be perfect. Our little slice of Heaven."

"Heaven." Castiel whispered. "Yes. I can make a new Heaven for myself here."

"Yeah, who needs those angel bastards when you got me?" Dean grinned and Castiel nodded.

"I enjoy being with you more then my brothers and sisters."

"Good. Now just relax. I'm gonna take a nap. When the others get back wake me up." Dean let out a small breath as he closed his eyes and allowed his body to relax a little, sinking into the deep comforter. Dean had to admit, Sam picked a nice motel for once. It was clean and comfortable here unlike what they were used to. He found himself drifting off, but he still felt Castiel's weight next to him, bringing him security that the angel was safe. He sighed again contentedly as Castiel snuggled even closer to him and Dean fell asleep.

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