Thanks for the nice Feedback and here are the Words, Lines and Images that popped in my head while watching Episode 2. Have fun...

Catherine Chandler [voice over] Being a detective is about drawing lines. The lines between us and them, good guys and bad guys, perp and victim.Then there are the lines we draw to protect ourselves. Rules, protocol. It's about not crossing those lines, because when you do, bad things can happen.

Catherine:

These last days this Lines became blurry, greyish for me. I had seen how dangerous it could get. How high the price could be for just knowing him. Had bruises on my body that showed it to me. My Career, my family, my friends and how I put them all in danger for this one Man. The logical Cop in me knew I had to take a step back, no better take 100 steps back, turn around and leave. But I couldn't. First I needed these answers about my mother, answers i knew only he could give me. He was my only chance of finding out what happened all that years ago and why. But I also was intrigued by this Man, so quietly helping all those people. How he had accomplished to stay under the radar so long. He was like a magnet for me, when I was wandering around I would found myself always in his Neighborhood. At night when I came home my first thought was to check on him. I was so curious to get to know him. This handsome man with the sad eyes and his soft speech stayed in my Mind, day and night. He touched something deep in me, the injustice of the life he had to live, always in the shadows, always looking behind his back. He did it with dignity but in some moments you could see his carefully placed mask slipping. He always spoke very quietly, like he didn't knew how the other person would react. It's like he forgot how to talk and interact with people. Or like the day I touched his cheek. He stopped breathing, letting himself only feel this innocent contact of skin on skin, savoring the unique warmth that only another human can give. I would still have my hand holding his face if it was for him. The look in his eyes when I withdrew it nearly made me touch him again. Just for nanoseconds you could see the loneliness and the despair in those dark eyes, not sure if he would ever get a chance of feeling it again.

I had to think about this feelings I had for him, what they are and what they could mean. Had I kind of a helping Complex? Was it just the Excitement of this new Person in my Live or was it maybe more. I was completely out of my comfort zone. Normally I had my few people who had had earned my trust. My family and Tess for example. I had never been the outgoing Type of person, never found it easy to make new friends. But you also couldn't say I was some kind of Wallflower, I just liked my Privacy. After work I usually just got home, ate something, work out and than read for a bit until I fell asleep. Sometimes I would go for a drink with Tess, ignoring the drunken Advances from the 'fresh of the Academy' Cops. I wasn't stupid, I realized when someone came on to me, that Evan flirted openly with me. But flings at work were a no-go for me plus he wasn't my type. Honestly I didn't know if I even had a type, my previous Boyfriends were just some guys,maybe a little to bad boyish for my own good. It never lasted long and never felt like I was truly loosing someone important. Maybe I was a emotional Cripple, just focused on my Job. No one had kept me interested until now. And it was frightening.

Vincent Keller But as much as I keep saying "stay away", I keep showing up, too. You know, the truth is I don't really have anyone to contact. You know, I mean, there's J.T., but that's J.T. And, uh... you've seen me when I don't want anyone to see me. And you still haven't run.

Vincent:

Stay away. How many times had I told her that within the last days, weeks. Sometimes with exactly this words, sometimes I had used others, but the matter had always been the same. And while I said those words, every time my mind had screamed at her, that if she goes could she please, just for a few seconds, touch my cheek again? So I can feel her soft, warm hand just one last time? I had gone so long without human contact. Sure I had J.T. but that contact felt a million times different. The occasional slaps on my back, the friendly shove of a shoulder weren't the same as her gently, feminine touch. His was encouraging, hers were soothing. Did she know that I sniffed her beautiful smell like a damn dog every time she was close, bathed in her sweet laughter when we talked? What a creep I was. She would run if she knew all of that or at least when she found out that I now stalked her almost everyday, followed her every step like a man possessed. There had been moments when we said our goodbyes when I wanted to drop to my knees and literally beg her to come back, to not leave me alone. And when the scene played out in my mind I was ashamed. Ashamed for my selfishness and for how pathetic I was. What had I become?

In a way I had forgotten how good it felt. And a mean, little part of me was angry at her for remembering me of feelings and longings I shouldn't or couldn't have. At first I told myself I would help her, just to come out of my Monotony. It made me feel useful, kept me occupied. But when she learned more about me, realized who I was and remembered me from that night it became uncomfortable. She started asking questions she shouldn't and got me and J.T. in a really dangerous situation. Not to mention herself. And the night on the Subway station? I had been honest with her, she had seen me how I never wanted anyone to see me, captured in my beastly rage and this grotesque body. Seen the real face of the Monster they had made. I wanted to hide under a rock at the thought that she had seen me like this. But she didn't run. I thought, probably because I saved her again. From the Killers that were after her because of my existence. Had she felt my heart beating a million beats per second as I shielded her with my body, the only protection I had to offer. I didn't felt the pull of the fast train, didn't hear the loud noise just felt her small body trapped between the dirty wall and my own. The days after that, J.T. was close to panicking, he saw right through me, saw how she changed something in me. When she took that photo I nearly lost it, showed her a glimpse of the Monster inside again just to get her to her senses. I was sure I had lost her, pushed her enough that time. But she didn't even flinch just watched me while i tried to control myself. No matter what i did, she always came back. J.T. and went so far to pretend i had run off for good. But even that didn't stopped her. When she didn't find me she wrote me a letter.

I had read it so often, the ink had started to fade. How desperate I had to be, to pull her in to this sick life, my life and to dump my problems on her. It wasn't her burden to take and there wasn't a chance she could do anything to help me. I tried to stay away from her, but every Day without her was like the light had been sucked out of my already empty Life. It was constant battle between my heart and Brain. And than, one night from my hiding spot, I saw how her eyes started searching the roofs of her neighborhood. Could this be real? Was she looking for me? J.T. told me the next day that she came looking for me. I was speechless and had no Idea how I should react. My friend expressed his concern everyday anxious for our safety. But i wrote two words on a piece of paper and had waited. No where to go, I had asked her to met me at the roof top from the ballet studio. Had waited anxiously for her to arrive with no idea what to say to her. I just had no power to fight it, I couldn't keep my distance. If she was my fatal mistake than I would make it with a smile in my lips.