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Chapter 29
It was still dark when Dean woke up. Castiel was sleeping next to him in the bed, breathing softly. He could barely make out the angel's face in the dark; he was pressed so close to Dean that he was afraid the angel might suffocate. Cas' hand was clasped loosely around his under the blankets.
There was no way he would be able to get back to sleep; not when the thought of facing War loomed in front of them. He inched away from the angel slowly, so as not to wake him. Cas made a soft noise but did not stir. Dean tucked the blankets back around him and stood, stretching widely.
The bed next to him looked like it had two lumps in it instead of the original one that was there when he had gone to bed. Dean grinned in spite of himself. Last night Amber had been there. Bobby had taken the pullout couch, and Sam had unrolled a sleeping bag on the floor.
Dean took a guess that maybe it had been too lonely on the floor. Shaking his head amusedly, he grabbed a beer from the fridge. Going to one of the windows, he pulled back the blinds to peek outside. The sun was just appearing over the horizon.
Taking a hearty swig of beer, Dean took a seat at the table and sat in the dark. It was another hour before Sam woke up and joined him at the table, yawning. The sun was fully up now, and Sam blinked at the brightness in the room.
Raising his eyebrows at the two beer bottles on the table, Sam looked to Dean for an answer. The elder Winchester shrugged.
"Nerves," he said simply. Sam could agree with that. His own heart was beating rather rapidly thinking about the task ahead. He copied his brother, popping open a beer and sipping slowly.
They sat in silence until Sam spoke. "I'm sorry about Bobby yesterday. He seems like he's getting more crotchety every day."
"He just wants this over with." Dean said quietly, defending the old guy for some reason he couldn't explain.
"We all do," Sam replied. "That's no reason to act like he did."
"He's right though. It's no time for games. We need to stop Lucifer. I'm just having a hard time keeping my head in the game right now."
Something sparked in Sam's memory at Lucifer's name. The dream he had. He never told Dean about it. Fingering his beer, he started, "Speaking of Lucifer, he came to me in a dream the other day."
"Again?" Dean said sharply and Sam nodded. "What did he say?"
"The same thing. That I belong to him, essentially."
The brothers were quiet, neither having anything to say, until Sam voiced something that he had been wondering about. "What happens when we get all the rings, Dean?"
"We lock Lucifer back up." Dean looked at Sam like he was crazy.
"Yeah, but how? You think he's just going to jump into a pit? Or let us push him in? I don't think so." Sam hesitated, then continued. He had been thinking alot about it, and came up with only one logical solution. "I've been thinking... maybe I could say yes."
"WHAT!" Dean said loudly, slamming his beer on the table. "No, you won't."
"Think about it. Lucifer jumps into my skin, I take control of my body and jump into the pit."
"No way."
Sam huffed, frustrated. "I did this, Dean. I started the Apocalypse. I need to try and fix it."
"No. We'll find another way." Dean said firmly and got up before Sam could say anything else.
Sam burned inside at Dean's refusal. Who was he to decide anyway? Sam wasn't a little kid anymore. It should be his decision alone. He could see no other way to coerce Lucifer back into the prison he had been so desperate to escape from in the first place.
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Dean was pacing outside the motel while the others were getting ready to leave. He peeked in the window and saw Cas chatting with Amber again; they were becoming best friends quickly.
Leaning his head against the wall and closing his eyes, he tried to steady himself for what was waiting in the next town. And the fact that Cas wasn't going to be going with them. He was determined to make the angel stay here even if he had to tie him down.
The squeak of the motel door made him open his eyes and he saw the angel standing there. He was frowning, watching Dean with worry.
"Are you alright?"
Dean reached for the angel, pulling him into his arms. "No."
"Why?" Cas questioned. He could feel Dean's heart beating rapidly. "What's wrong?"
Dean sighed, running a hand through Cas' hair. "You can't come with us."
Castiel looked indignant and pulled away from his mate. "Why not?"
"Cas...you can't use your powers right now." Dean took his hands gently. "You can't protect yourself."
"I can." Cas said stubbornly.
"I don't want you to come, Cas. Please stay here." Dean pleaded, worry shining in his eyes. "I won't be able to...I just... need you to stay here."
"What if something happens to you?" Cas asked, squeezing Dean's hands. "I won't know."
"You will." Dean leaned forward, kissing his forehead. "As long as I'm alive, I will come back to you, Cas. I swear. If I don't come back..then you'll know."
"Dean, no." Fear filled Cas eyes as tears began dripping from them.
"Oh, Cas." Dean pulled the angel to him, wrapping him up. Dean patted his back and whispered soothingly in his ear . "I love you more then you will ever know."
Sam was calling him from inside, Bobby yelling that they needed to get going.
"Amber can stay with you. You two will be safe here." Dean brushed the tears from the angel's cheeks. "Please Cas, do this for me."
Castiel desperately wanted to go with his mate, but he knew Dean was speaking sense. If Dean had to worry about him, he wouldn't be able to focus and he might get hurt. It would be better this way.
"Fine," Cas whispered and Dean hugged him. The relief that was surrounding him was almost overpowering to Cas' senses, and he was glad he took some pressure off his mate.
Sam came out, looking for Dean. "What the hell are you doing?"
"I'm coming." Dean muttered. " You ready?"
"No," Sam said grimly.
"That's what I like to hear." Dean gave a forced grin before pulling Cas back inside.
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Bobby and Sam were waiting in the Impala. Dean had convinced Amber to stay, and she was standing in the doorway of their room with Cas, looking extremely worried.
"Don't die, Dean." Cas whispered, tears trickling down his cheeks as Dean held him tightly.
"I'll try not to," Dean grinned, but there was no emotion behind it. Just a gesture to try and reassure the angel. Their lips met for a brief moment and then Dean released him. The angel wouldn't let go however.
Dean gently pried his hands off his jacket, kissing his fingertips before letting them go.
"See you later." he headed for the car, making the mistake of looking back one last time. Cas and Amber looked like their husbands were going off to battle and they shouldn't expect them to come home. Cas seemed to be in a daze, looking utterly lost and alone. The sudden urge to grab Cas and just drive away from all this shit almost overwhelmed him.
Dean quickly gave himself a mental slap, said that it wasn't possible to run away anymore and hopped into the Impala.
"Let's do this then," he said as Bobby and Sam nodded in agreement. Turning the radio up and blasting 'The Four Horsemen', Dean pressed down on the gas, roaring out of the parking lot and leaving the smell of burning rubber behind.