Titans: Elemental
Chapter 78: Revolution, Part 2
We see an empty street corner, with two robots standing guard at a gated compound across the way, and then look into an alley. Vic peeks out from behind a telephone box; the others follow suit below him. Jack levitates a pebble and aims it across the street.
We see a bit of sidewalk, where it clatters down at the brace of sentries. Their attention drawn by the small commotion, they do a smart left-face and march off toward it, and the Titans, Beast Boy as a pigeon, fly or are carried over the gates. Inside this compound, they tiptoe carefully across the grounds, Beast Boy back in human form; suddenly, they freeze and dive behind a corner just before a line of robots marches through. Once they have moved off, the heroes make a dive for an empty archway.
This time, Beast Boy takes the lead, again becoming a pigeon and flying to a closed door. He steals a glimpse through its barred window before resuming human form; a quick look around, and he gives an all-clear wave to bring the others in.
Raven, "good. Now we just have to-"
She grasps the door handle as the group suddenly finds itself in shadow. They gasp in surprise; a blinding spotlight trains itself on them and lightning flashes across the sky. When it clears, the vista has changed to show puffy orange clouds in a sunny sky of the same color. Mad Mod pushes them aside and booms out from the heavens. Now he has removed his powdered wig, revealing the red hair beneath, and put his crown on again over it. His look has a Monty Python feel to it.
Mad Mod, "and here we are again! You know, there's an old British saying, my duckies. 'Those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it.'"
Jack, "bologna! That's a quote from an American philosopher; George Santayana!"
Mad Mod shuts up for a moment as he's caught in a bold faced lie.
He then squeaks, "it's still a good quote…."
The old spiraling hypnotic pattern extends from his forehead to fill the area, and the fur Titans disappear into it.
Mad Mod, "and you lot are as doomed as doomed can be!"
The swirling vortex retreats to become one of several panels as Mad Mod's sneering face appears in it.
A music cue: Fourth of July Parade, by Andy Sturmer plays. It is quick, light, somewhat frenetic, with a rhythm line based on a military march. More panels pop up and the background cycles through assorted colors, while the yo-yo who started all this leaps nimbly down.
He has traded in his royal robes and crown for his usual dark suit.
The Titans charge after him, whereupon he disappears from the central panel that shows his face and runs off in a different direction, with the group hot on his trail.
….
We see the Independence Hall in Philadelphia, where Benjamin Franklin is about to sign the Declaration of Independence. The quill shakes in his hand, leaving scribbles of ink across the parchment, and all stare in shock at a group of sudden uninvited guests. The Titans are on the run, Vic firing his cannon backward, Blackfire doing the same with starbolts, and Mad Mod's foot soldiers, tanks, and planes barrel after them. Sturmer begins to vocalize as the American flag's red and white stripes wave across the screen; these give way to the stars and blue field, which are smashed to bits by Mad Mod, now a jackhammer-wielding, hard-hatted construction worker.
….
We see Mount Rushmore, where he has shifted his attention. He soon knocks off and bails out, the Titans charge in after him, and we then see that he has redesigned the landmark quite a bit. The faces of Washington, Jefferson, Lincoln, and Theodore Roosevelt have given way to those of the Beatles, all topped with red hair cut in his favorite style. Now clad in a Union Jack sport coat ensemble, he snaps a couple of pictures and then vacates the premises before the Titans come after him again.
Rose is muttering to herself, "this is all an illusion. This is all an illusion. This is all an illusion."
Their passage throws up a cloud of dust; as it dissipates, the view changes to a patch of stormy sky and tilts down to an icy river. A small rowboat is piloted in, Vic and Jack pointing the way while Blackfire, Rose, Beast Boy, Raven, and Starfire row, and in the stern is a red flag with the Titans' insignia. The tableau is along the lines of Emanuel Gottlieb Leutze's famous painting George Washington Crossing the Delaware. Suddenly, they stop and retreat at high speed, and a second or two later, a Union Jack-painted submarine breaks the surface to give chase.
The scared heroes now race flat out, only to crash squarely into something. They pull back to see that they have hit the Liberty Bell, which cracks under their impact. Once their heads have stopped ringing, they go back to their pursuit. After they have gone, Mad Mod, now wearing both his hard hat and sportcoat, drops into view and plies a welding torch, sealing the break from the bottom up. Before he is halfway done, though, he finds several teeth-gritted glares a foot from his face. A swift strike against the bell deafens the Titans and gives him something to laugh about.
Mad Mod, "there's something happening…."
We see the Titans in a large steaming vessel. A fresh cup of tea held by Mad Mod, who has changed back into his dark suit! As he prepares to take a sip, they leap over the edge and bug out. Next, they make their way across an intersection and are chased by an invading tank. One after another, they dive into a parked car only to have a robot move in on it.
Vic emerges from a different car and climbs into a bus. The sentry runs up, but is surprised when Beast Boy emerges from a nearby car as an ostrich. Raven starts to get out on its other side, but ducks back in when another robot catches sight of her. Jack hops from one car to another.
Mad Mod, "raining down on the Fourth of July parade!"
The robot tries the door, but gives up after a moment, while Starfire and Rose clear out from a vehicle behind it; we see another car, from which all the Titans emerge.
Mad Mod, "parade!"
The Titans are sent down a new street, being chased by a group of androids.
Mad Mod, "raining down on the Fourth of July parade!"
We see Jack, Vic, Raven, and Starfire in adjacent telephone boxes. They keep their backs to the street and the receivers to their ears as the pursuers rush past; once they are gone, we see Rose, Blackfire and Beast Boy sitting on a nearby bench and reading a newspaper. BB soon lowers it and the trio clear out with the others, but an instant later, all of them have reversed course to stay ahead of a horde of tanks. In one turret; Mad Mod is in the driver's seat, firing away and grinning like mad. The Titans continue their full-scale retreat, but are immediately squashed by a giant foot as at the end of the opening credits to Monty Python's Flying Circus. The music abruptly stops.
….
We see this on the monitor in Mad Mod's control room. He is back in his robes, wig, and crown, with a hand on Dick's shoulder, and the white-haired Titan voices a weak moan of protest.
Mad Mod pats Dick's shoulder, "there, there, old man. At least we still have each other."
Bryan groans with a glare.
….
We see a large upper-story window of an imposing structure, which is in normal Jump City style instead of black and white. We look past a tall, Union Jack-festooned fence that encircles this compound, then look down to ground level. A sign comes into focus on the front gate: "Closed by order of King Mod."
Inside, the assembly hall is dark and in disarray; Vic throws open the doors, stirring up a gust of wind that shifts the papers and dust that litter the floor.
Vic, "city Hall. We should be able to hide here….", entering; the others follow, "... 'til Mad Mod's tanks come to tear it down."
Raven, "whoa. That was actually more depressing than what I was gonna say."
Starfire, "do not despair. We will rescue Richard and Bryan and save the city and stop the Mad Mod…."
The others' spirits have barely lifted; Vic sits heavily in a nearby chair.
Starfire, "... somehow."
Beast Boy slides to the floor, "well, let's face it. My gerbil commando plan is just lame."
Blackfire, "it's barely even a plan."
Raven, "it's not any worse than my plan."
Vic, "or mine."
Starfire, "or mine."
BB, "now I know how George Washington felt when Napoleon beat him at Pearl Harbor-"
Rose smacked Beast Boy over the head and said, "no. Stop. We're not doing that. You're not THAT stupid!"
Raven, "well, Beast Boy is right about one thing. This is hopeless. We tried everything we could think of. Nothing worked."
Vic stands up.
Vic, "but why not? We're dealing with a scrawny little stick-man with a tricked-out cane, robots and screens! Why can't we bring him down?"
Starfire, "because the Mad Mod was right."
Starfire comes into view, standing by a display case that holds a copy of the Declaration of Independence. Beast Boy is on his feet in a flash.
BB, "the American Revolution really was a hoax?"
Starfire, "no. He said, 'those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it.'"
Jack, "yeah, but the dipstick stole it from an American quote. What's your point?"
Starfire turns to the case. She looks at the signed lower portion; her reflection appears in the glass as she speaks.
Starfire, "we have failed to learn from the history Mad Mod is attempting to rewrite", she looks at her friends and crosses the floor; light slowly fades behind her, "your democracy is not merely about voting. It is about compromise. Out of many different people, you make one country. Out of many flawed ideas, you create one that works."
Vic, "we don't need four different plans…."
Raven, "... we just need one."
Blackfire smiled at her sister as she was inspiring the others.
Starfire smiles broadly, knowing that her first shot at political oratory has borne fruit.
Jack, "I think I know the perfect plan."
Everyone looked at Jack.
Jack, "I may not be as good of a leader as Dick... But I hope you'll follow my lead this day..."
His friends all gave firm nods.
Jack smiled and said, "okay, here's the plan..."
….
We see the Titans under a stretch of very British sky at a traffic circle, or roundabout, for those of you in the United Kingdom. Robotic soldiers march through, and Mad Mod's hypnotic patterns play on a bank of large outdoor screens. His eyes appear among them and are replaced by the Union Jack after a few seconds. The mechanical redcoats advance down the street, meeting no resistance from the passive throngs on the sidewalks. We see the occupation forces stretch all the way down the block; tanks as well as infantry.
The black-and-white spirals are now broadcast from screens all over the city as a flag-marked balloon floats up among the buildings.
We see one of Mad Mod's feet, tapping its toe on a moving platform. The tanks roll on, the balloon coasting not far back.
We then see behind the redheaded king.
Inside a building, a couple of people wave cheerfully at the passing craft.
Mod is smiling as wide as his mouth will stretch; if it went any farther, his whole head would fall off. We see the platform's edge, which can now be seen with a flag.
Mad Mod's catbird seat is suspended from it, and he waves brightly to the crowd; part of the surface is covered by an awning.
Mad Mod, "that's right, me duckies! You love King Moddy! You love being Brits! Silly old America's a thing of the past!"
He gestures behind himself at Bryan amf Dick seated under the awning, who are trying desperately to get on their feet. The liver-spotted Titans cannot even lift themselves a millimeter, and they finally give up.
Mad Mod holds up his cane, "I'll bet you'd like this, wouldn't you, old chum? Well, what's stopping you? Go ahead and-"
He is abruptly cut off by a series of explosions that stretch up and down the block. The marching robots stop, causing his balloon platform to bump into them and throw him off balance.
Mad Mod, "wha-", he straightens up, "Oy! Who told you lot to stop? Keep marching! My British subjects are in the middle of adoring me!"
The huge bank of hypno-screens is immediately caught in the grip of Raven's powers and shattered; their destruction brings the motionless crowd back to their senses, and they simply begin to walk away from the gaudy spectacle. Mad Mod is so stunned that he cannot find any words, and the train wreck continues when a blast from Vic's cannon and a ball of fire from Jack wipes out the balloon, dropping the platform hard to the street. Now Mad Mod is thrown down again; when he sits up and throws a panicked look around, Raven levitates several distant soldiers into a mighty heave that carries them over the rooftops. Blackfire has just thrown a robot into a wall.
All of the Titans are on the scene.
Vic, "man, I bet even real British people don't like you!"
Mad Mod stands up, "a frontal assault? Haven't you sprogs tried that already?"
A cannon shot slices through the air, forcing him to duck in order not to get his head blown off. Standing up again, he adjusts his sunglasses a bit.
Mad Mod, "right!"
He swings his cane. Now his skin has turned gray, and his arms and legs issue from a large sphere emblazoned with the Union Jack. Those of you who have seen "Yellow Submarine" will be reminded of the Blue Meanies' appearance.
Mad Mod, "destroy 'em!"
The troops advance as the fighters fly overhead. More ground forces promptly join the maneuver; at an intersection, another battalion is marching in from a different direction. Muzzles are leveled at the team, at which point Beast Boy assumes falcon form and bails out, while Raven puts a shield up around herself, Vic, and Starfire, and Jack forms a shield of fire around him, Blackfire and Rose. Shots burst harmlessly against the barriers, and they soon collapse to show the Titans are gone. Mad Mod's gray face falls at the sight and then snarls; we see the freedom fighters overhead, Raven and Starfire holding Vic by one arm apiece, Jack and Rose riding a slab of Earth, Beast Boy hovering alongside.
Yelling, Vic is flung forward and fires his cannon full blast. That one long, powerful beam wipes out several ranks of Beefeaters; others continue their advance, but he comes down to charge right at them. A crushing pistol-whip punch tears a hole through one metal chest, just as before, and a point-blank cannon shot blows the victim apart. One of its gears is flung down the street to take out another enemy; now several tanks roll up and open fire. As Vic stands his ground, Raven drops a black barrier in front of him to block the shots. She and Blackfire come down after it, hurling long bolts that lash out like bullwhips and bullets and slice and shoot through the tanks as if they were built from soggy bread. More explosions.
Starfire flies high over the faux-British streets and gains altitude, trying to shake the fighters that are giving her no quarter. Beast Boy, now a monkey, drops past her and becomes a roaring tyrannosaurus rex just in time to land on a squad of robots. Instant scrap metal; amid the clearing dust, a few survivors prepare to fire, but get smacked down by that massive tail. More tanks move in, but instead of taking them on, Beast Boy becomes a hummingbird and flits away as shells detonate all around him.
Jack shoots every element at his foes.
A tank is engulfed in flames, a robot is smashed by a boulder, a plane is electrocuted and made to smash into another tank as a third tank is wrapped up and crushed in vines. A robot is electrocuted by a blast of water and lightning, and one last robot is blown into a wall by a gust of strong air!
Rose jumps down beside Vic as he keeps fighting.
The fighters continue their relentless pursuit of Starfire, who swoops here and there as if trying to find an opportunity to elude them. She takes a hairpin turn and goes into a sharp dive toward the street; the chase zooms along a narrow road, leaving all with nearly zero maneuvering room, then reaches open air again. Off she goes, climbing steeply as she passes Big Ben. In the street, Raven dodges a salvo of tank fire, gets a few pieces of flying debris under control, and uses them to smash the armored vehicles.
Here comes Vic, still firing away with Rose throwing ninja stars. They skip away from rifle shots and duck into a handy alley. The troops move steadily after them.
In a nearby house through the windows, they can be seen working their way up; there must have been a back door. They reach the highest floor.
The windows are soon lost beneath the impact of a colossal metal fist as we see an oversized redcoat trying to dig them out. Vic's cannon blast tears through the head and leaves only a sparking metal hulk slumped against the facade; now he rips the wind-up key from its back and scales it with vicious force. A line of robots is decapitated by the throw.
Mad Mod straightens up, shouldering a huge red-white-and-blue bazooka. He puts his eye to the scope, stopping on Vic, Rose, Blackfire and Raven amid a group of his soldiers. She throws a shot as he primes the weapon. The round he fires streaks toward the besieged foursome, trailing exhaust fumes all the way, and explodes with enough force to hide the entire block under dust and smoke. Robot bodies fly everywhere in the tumult.
Mad Mod grins savagely and stomps a switch set in the floor of his platform. This brings up a lever, which he yanks, and the entire craft floats free of the ground. It backs out of the way just before several smashed androids crash down at that spot. High above, the fighters zoom past the spire of Big Ben; Starfire is plastered against its rear face to stay out of sight. She holds her fire until just the right moment, then let's go with a string of starbolts that send the planes down in flames. Their detonations wink all around the majestic clock tower like green fireflies.
Mad Mod plays with a chess set as he yells, "Jolly good, boys! Show these Yanks who's king around here!"
He leans out of view, exposing Dick and Bryan still in the chairs behind him. The ancient crime-fighters have just decided that enough is too much; one fist each clenches tightly in their wrinkled gloves. Mad Mod grins nastily, the green starbursts continue around Big Ben, and on the ground a battery of cannons has been set up.
Mad Mod, "fire!"
The air is filled with ordnance in no time flat; these shots home in on the clock's spire and score a direct hit. Starfire plummets screaming to earth. The man who would be king snickers nastily, and she is carried in a stretched-arm half-spread eagle by one of the gargantuan robots. Raven, Blackfire, Rose, Jack and Vic are brought in, similarly held; all unconscious Titans are brought to the rotund ruler's platform. He floats a bit closer.
Mad Mod jumps off and crosses to them, "what a surprise, my duckies. Your little plan didn't work!"
Vic has lost his right arm. With a twirl of his cane, Mad Mod reverts to his normal physique and dark suit.
Mad Mod shades his eyes, "say, where's the green one? Run away, has he?"
Starfire and Jack wake up.
Starfire, "the green one is our plan."
Jack, "Beast Boy! You're up!"
We look to the sky as they call his name. Beast Boy drops into view as a flying squirrel. Landing squarely on Mad Mod's shoulder, he works his way under the suit jacket and sets the redheaded Englishman yelling and squirming.
Mad Mod, "stop! Hahahaha! You kidder! Oh, that tickles! Oh! Oh, stop it! Hahaha!"
During this line, Vic's detached arm rockets down the street. It does a sharp U-turn and zooms past Mad Mod, locking those metal fingers around the cane and yanking him off his feet. He is unceremoniously relieved of the walking stick and dumped on his face; the crown bounces away, and the limb soars high overhead as he stands up again.
Mad Mod, "FIRE!"
One of the few surviving robotic troops obeys his command. Its shot roars toward the flying arm and strikes the hand; the bionic appendage spirals toward the street, smoke billowing from its attachment point, but it does not release the cane until it is about to crash down. Seeing it come free, Mad Mod voices a short laugh and makes a desperate lunge?
In slow motion, Mod hurls himself up over the edge, his hands outstretched as if trying to catch a football. But the first fingers to close around it are Bryan and Dick's.
Two shocked gasps from the forcibly deposed monarch, the gloves quiver a bit, and Mad Mod tumbles to the deck. Dick and Bryan have finally raised themselves from their chairs.
Mad Mod, "now, now, old beans. Let's not do anything hasty."
Dick's thumb tweaks the ruby head.
Bryan groans, "kiss…. Our…. Wrinkly…. Butts!"
The three are enveloped in crackling red brilliance-but this time, the Dick and Bryan spirits pass from Mad Mod to their rightful homes. Each are restored to their proper age as the light fades; Mad Mod gasps weakly as he looks at his wrinkled fingers. Dick breaks the cane in two.
He and Bryan smirk.
Mad Mod, "NOOOOOOOO!
As his yell dies away, the robots' eyes wink out and they collapse, releasing their hold on the captives. The companies go down like so many dominoes, and all around him the British cityscape and sky collapse as if made of giant playing cards. Behind it all, Jump City stands intact under the night sky. A bank of hypno-screens crashes down, revealing the pizza joint.
Rose, "I KNEW IT WAS ALL FAKE!"
Dick hauls Mad Mod up by his shirt front.
Mad Mod, "hehe, hello, guv'nor."
Dick, "just like old times, huh?"
Bryan, "you ain't gonna like American prison food, Moddy…."
Starfire, "Nightwing!"
She flies to hug him and Dick's face flushes as he drops Mad Mod.
Starfire, "you are un-wrinkled!"
Rose grabs Bryan and pulls him into a kiss before saying, "just the way I like it."
Bryan chuckles and blushes.
All the Titans are now gathered here, Beast Boy is back in human form, and Vic has reattached his arm.
Dick, "what took you guys so long?"
BB, "we just needed a little time to brush up on our history."
Blackfire, "if this is American history, I gotta see your predictions of the future."
Starfire pulls away, suddenly very worried.
Starfire, "uh…. Nightwing?"
His eyes pop as he lifts the jacket of Mad Mod's cheap suit: the elderly Brit is no longer in it.
Dick, "huh?"
Jack, "where did that old jerk go to?"
Mad Mod has given them the slip, and all look around frantically.
Dick, "where did he-?"
We see behind the platform as all of them peek over it. The fugitive is here, caught in the act of trying to sneak out. When he turns back to them with a nervous laugh, his pants fall down to expose a pair of Union Jack briefs.
Raven, "okay…. Really not something I needed to see."
Rose, "I wish I was blinded in both eyes now…."
Mod peels out, veering back and forth as the Titans do their best to keep up with him.
Needless to say, the chase went on for awhile….
...
Later, at the Tower...
Jack had just walked into the living room, where everyone was sat.
Dick, "we're all in agreement then."
Jack, "agreement to what?"
Bryan, "the others told us how you took charge and came up with the plan to save us."
Jack, "I just did what I could to save the day."
Dick, "and that's why the whole team agrees; you should be second in command."
Jack, "... say wha?"
Raven, "we all agreed that while Dick is the leader, you're more then fit to be second in command."
Dick held his hand out and asked, "what do you say?"
Jack smiled and shook Dick's hand, honored by the new responsibility he'd been given.
….
Reviews:
raven 2012: I'm glad you loved it.
Bailey Radcliff: thanks so much. Happy you're gonna see the movie and that your dog is doing better.
Canadude2029: happy to hear all that.
pokemonking092: thanks.
….
I know this episode is a little goofy, but I love any episode with Mad Mad in it.
Note: The three items Beast Boy mentions are traditional British dishes. "Bangers and mash" = sausages and mashed potatoes; "bubble and squeak" = potatoes and leftover vegetables fried together, sometimes with meat; "toad in the hole" = sausages baked into doughy Yorkshire pudding.