Okay, be prepared for the longest piece I've written for this Show. Also i added a few lines here a there in the previous chapters through learning more about this characters. Hope you enjoy...

ps who is this Alex chick and can she please go away? like now ? :-)

Vincent: I couldn't get... couldn't get back to being me and Evan pulled up so I had to make a choice. He was your best Option.

Vincent:

And there would be a day when she realized that Evan was indeed the better Option. I knew that for sure. But I was selfish and would be by her side for as long she would let me and in every possible way. The future wasn't going to change for me, with the mutations in mind it would only get worse and someday she would recognize the obvious differences between us and than she will take the opportunity. The opportunity of more. Moving in together, going out, getting married or having children. That were just a few things that someone like Evan could offer her but you just can't marry someone with a death certificate. I would have laid the world at her feet, but the obstacles were against me. Last night I couldn't even follow the ambulance because I couldn't get out of my beastly state. I had been a wreck when I finally made it home. Had spent the night worried sick, running in circles at the warehouse and with J.T. stopping me more than just once from coming to the hospital. The last time I had felt so unbelievable hopeless, I had witnessed the death of my brothers live on TV. Like then, I couldn't do a thing other than just standing on the side watching someone else try rescuing my loved ones.

Carefully I took her small hand and laced her fingers with mine. My hand was so much bigger, I thought while trying not to consider about how I had almost lost her last night. I didn't know if I could go back to a world without her. She said she accepted me, all of me and no matter if that was the truth, after her recovery I would be with her, I promised myself. No more fear and no more doubts, we both felt something for another and even in my position life was to short to let this slip away. It was like a wake up call. The way she had looked at me yesterday when we danced made me brave. Her eyes had seen me, the real me. No matter if it worked or for how long I could be with her until my life would go upside down again, but this was worth it. Even if I would never be enough for her, I would do anything I could to make her happy.

Time was running and I knew I couldn't stay in the Hospital. I had to go back to my hiding hole and wait for the night, through I wished for nothing more than to be at her side and ease her pain. Or to just keep her company but I couldn't even do that. A vibration informed us that said better option was on his way up to her. With a heavy heart I withdraw my Hand, instantly missing her warmth. I said goodbye to her and after putting my mask back on, I slipped out of her door. Not 10 seconds outside I saw Evan on his way, walking confident while carrying a bouquet of flowers. Flowers! Damn, I should have thought about that. I had been so distracted, sneaking in here at daylight. Just what I needed, another reminder that I was the second better choice. We passed each other and for me it felt like the Monster retreated for the Hero. While I was mentally beating myself up, I pulled the mask down and got on to the stairs. Shock pumped through me when I heard my name called. My full name, loud and clear. As I ran out of that building I knew, I would recognize that voice everywhere.

Alex : It's okay, its okay Vince told me everything, obviously that's what you do when your somebody's handler.

Catherine :

My head is spinning. Excuse me what? His Handler? And what happened to never telling any one? I had spent weeks of conversations for little pieces of information and he tells her everything in the blink of an eye? And don't let me start on 'Vince'. Maybe my pain meds making me hallucinate? That would be a good explanation right now. She is bursting with happiness while I try to figure out what is happening. Why did he lie about me, about us? And as I sit here on the couch next to this woman from Vincent's past, with jealousy cursing through my veins, I try my best to dislike her. But I can't. She is beautiful, sweet and one of this sunshine persons. You know, the ones that brings the sun with them while entering a room. Maybe a little naive. And she talks, like without pause, what's good because I wouldn't have any idea of what to say to her. She tells me about the burglary and I try to handle it professional. It helps keeping my emotions and my pain in check, but since I know a bit of their history and that Vincent was with her last night, the lines are getting blurry. Is the pain from my wound or from my heart? It feels the same to me. Even a blind man could see her love for him and after all, it seems like Vincent also has still feelings for her. Alex's offers me a coffee and I take the time to look around her apartment. Not that there is really something suspicious.

I look through handbags and luggage till I have a small box in my hands. Always the cop I take a peak inside. My heart stops. Letters, so many letters with written words of adoration and love. And the Word Wedding. Pictures of a carefree Vincent, his face young and unharmed, smiling at the Camera. Or even better, looking at her with love shining in his eyes. I feel nauseous, like I'm intruding this perfect history. I have never seen him like that, so untroubled. The Vincent that I know is quiet, brooding, unbelievable shy and carries the weight of the world on his shoulders. And if that moment isn't bad enough I hear Alex's front door open and close and his voice sounds through the rooms. I put all the stuff away and try to get my composure back. Putting my best hard cop face on, I look straight at him when he enters the room. A handler I ask him? For a moment I let him see the hurt in my eyes but I'm not going to cry, not here. When Alex is coming I tell them with an robotic voice what I found out, that she is probably a target and that he should stay with her, obvious cause its where he belong I add in my head. He stands helpless there in that little wardrobe room. So I give him my cup and leave the the apartment without another look at Vincent. Time to go home where I can bury my feelings in private.

But I'm a good cop so I find out who's after her, and go through with that stupid plan she makes. And now, with no sight and pain running through my entire body, I run through the dark tunnels of the hospital, trying to prevent Vincent from going ballistic again. Oh and by the way trying to safe his Friend? Girlfriend? Ex-fiancé? I hear some shooting and increase my step. I hope we can safe his... I have no idea and it doesn't matter any way because when the lights flip back on and I get through the door next to me, I see her. She is safe, wrapped in his arms while they kiss. When he looks up I shortly think it's because he had heard my heart breaking. But I know, he would see it anyway without any proof of sound. I step back, letting them have their privacy. To go back home where I can drown this day in Vodka and bury my heart next to my feelings...

Catherine : Well I guess I... I wanted to know him.

Vincent : Hey that guy isn't completely gone okay.

Catherine: Not when you're with her.

Vincent:

Yeah it would have been better, easier. The former Vincent would have gone to her birthday party, kissing the Girl in the photo booth instead of hiding on the fire escape watching another man do it. But I wasn't that person any more. Unfortunately, I WAS the guy on the fire escape but she was the girl standing there with me. But unlike the other times she was closed up, holding her arms around her like she was trying to hold herself together. Seeing Alex kiss me had obviously hurt her, I know but how I should tell her that I hadn't wanted that either. I wanted her to kiss me, wanted to explore this with her, but as ever I didn't know how to say it, the words just jumped around in my head with nothing coming out of my mouth. So she did most of the talking but didn't like the direction she was going with her words. Yeah, we were both in a bad condition when we met, but I always thought that had helped us finding each other. Making us equal while we got to know each other. It wasn't just good it was the best thing that happend to me since years. But obviously she thinks different about it. It feels more like she is ending this, what ever we were. Like she would back out on us. Had something made her realize that this had no future. Was it the mutations? Alex? Pure self protection? Nothing had ever happened between us and maybe it was never her intention. She had just helped the poor guy on the run, without any romantic intentions. Could I have been that wrong?

Maybe I was just to damaged for her, had to much baggage. It's not that I was dating material, a killing machine with a target on his back. Honestly, I wouldn't want me too. She had always a thing for the tough man, I had seen a few of them come and go over the years. And I remembered her Words, wishing I was a normal guy. I asked her about it and she declines but it doesn't sound so convincing. I was far from normal, possible that she finally understood that. She told me that she forget how to be close to somebody as if I couldn't understand that. Didn't she see that we were in the same place? I certainly had no idea how to interact or talk with other people or how to be with somebody, she was the perfect example for that. We had risked too much to loose this now. But none of my words made her realize that. And than she asked me about Alex.

Alex feelings for me were crystal clear. She knew it, I knew it. It had always been that way. She was the only girl in our group of friends, when we grew up and we had liked each other since 3rd grade. Made our graduation together, got to prom together. She was my first Kiss, first Girlfriend, first for everything. The only Girl I ever was with. I had thought I loved her. But looking back it was never anything like what I felt for Catherine. To fall for Alex had been easy, safe. Building this sheltered life together. Catherine on the other hand had been like a all consuming drug, a roller coaster full of ups and downs. I had never felt that with a woman before. To compare the two women and my feelings for them was like comparing Water to a rich, red wine. And Catherine, she knew me, had seen me in my ugliest Moments. Had accepted me completely, even with the Beast. Alex would probably run. And what I had done to Alex could never be forgiven, but how do you fix the pain and grief of 10 Years? I would never forgive myself for being the reason for her misery but that didn't change the things I feel.

I couldn't make Catherine understand, she didn't let me. She insisted on my feelings for Alex, our history and the knowing that Alex would do anything for me. She is a good person, maybe she thought she was giving me back my old life. But for me it felt like she pushed me away, not just away but in the arms of another woman. My stupid mind just couldn't find the right words. I had jumped, had chosen her but she gave up on me, letting me fall. Defeated, I gave in and left her alone.