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Chapter 33

It was consensus of opinion that it would be wise to summon a Reaper to see if it could lead them to Death. Well, not wise per say, but necessary. So their hunt continued again, with the search for a ritual to summon a reaper.

It took a few days to figure out how to summon the thing; there was not much on the subject and the reading was tedious. Dean stayed at their motel room with Castiel to research on the computer while the others went to the local library.

Cas was beginning to get restless being cooped up, but as long as Dean was with him it wasn't too bad.

They usually laid on the bed, keeping the computer between them so they could both see the screen. Every so often Dean would reach over a run a hand over Cas' stomach, making the angel shiver. A few times the computer almost wound up on the floor, as the brief touch led to heated kisses, but they were quickly reminded that the Apocalpse was still looming ahead and they needed to prevent it.

It was quite hard to focus on the screen and not on each other, but they managed. Barely.

Amber was the one who finally found the correct spell and ingredients for the summoning. She, Sam and Bobby were once again in the library. With all the reading they were doing, she felt like she was back in school, studying up for some big test.

Rubbing her weary eyes, she picked up yet another book and began paging through it. A grotesque illustration caught her eyes and she paused to read the page. Her eyes grew wide, and she gasped quietly so that she caught Sam's attention.

"Look," she squealed excitedly, pushing the book over to Sam and Bobby. It was an old book, the pages worn and yellowed, with a crinkled leather cover.

Bobby grabbed it eagerly, scanning the page. His lips moved as he read silently. "Yeah, this looks like it might do the trick."

"We'll try it. The worst that can happen is the reaper won't appear." Sam said, also reading the page. Looking around surreptitiously to make sure no one was watching, he ripped the page from the book, folding it carefully before placing it in his pocket.

"Let's get out of here, then." Sam said. They all exchanged glances, chills running down their spines as they realized how close they actually were to facing Death.

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The instructions for the summoning said the rutual could be done on the waning cresent moon right before dawn. Apparently in this respect they were lucky, because the moon was in the correct phase. It was also adamant that the Reaper had to summoned in a place of death...and there was a cemetary not far from their motel.

It was late by the time they were able to procure all of the ingredients needed, but Bobby suggested that they catch a few hours of sleep before the summoning, which sounded like a good idea to all.

In the dark and quiet room, only the sounds of breathing could be heard; Sam with Amber, Bobby on the couch, Dean snoring with Cas by his side. Except Cas wasn't sleeping.

His mind was whirring a mile a minute, thinking about a million different things. Mostly how to stuff Lucifer back in the cage. They were so close, yet still so far. Getting the Horsemen's rings was only step one; step two was even even harder.

Lucifer would not go williingly, that was for sure. Perhaps there was a way...he had heard stories of angels binding their graces to souls to help them cross into heaven; souls that were lost and could not find their way. Once the souls completed the journey to heaven, the Grace would be restored to its owner.

This situation was different, but there might be a chance that it could work. Angels had no souls, but perhaps the Grace to be bound to the being itself.

If he bound his Grace to Lucifer ...Cas shuddered at the thought of his Grace being attached to Lucifer's tainted form. He would have to think on this more, and not mention it to Dean until he had some idea of what the consequences would be. He was sure that Dean would have a problem with it, but if it was necessary to prevent the Apocalypse, Cas would do it. As long as it wouldn't effect the baby.

The baby...Cas placed a hand on his belly and his mind turned to different thoughts. These thoughts were no where as important as how to cage Lucifer, but they made Cas panic more then the dilemma with Lucifer.

There would a time when he and Dean would be together, living a 'normal' life; he was sure of it. But right now it was almost impossible, faced with the situation, to carry any hope. The baby was going to come soon, and they still had not defeated Lucifer. They were sleeping in a motel bed, with less then satisfactory room furnishings. They didn't have anything ready for the baby's arrival.

Cas sat up, trying not to hyperventilate and wake Dean. Pressure built up inside him as he imagined the baby sleeping in a nest of blankets in the backseat of the impala while he and Dean hunted Lucifer down. He wasn't a human and he had no experience raising a child, but he was positive that he did not want his child living like that. Perhaps without parents when Lucifer destroyed them.. terrible graphic images popped into his mind. Dean being slaughtered, bleeding and screaming on the ground, and he could nothing to help because he was already dead. Maybe after killing them Lucifer would go after the baby as well. Destroy all opposition at once so he would have nothing to worry about in the future.

Gasping softly at the thought , Cas stood abrupty, the bed creaking under him. Dean stirred as Cas' warmth left his side, and turned over, feeling for the angel . Blinking his eyes open, Dean noticed the angel's silhouette above him.

"Cas," he mumbled softly, but the angel didn't reply. Feelings of anxiety, fear and worry were clouding heavily around Castiel now, and Dean sat up, fully awake as the emotions hit him hard. Hopping out of bed, he was by Cas' side in a second.

"What's the matter?" he asked sharply when he glimpsed Cas' white face. He reached an arm around Cas' shoulders and found that the angel was shaking.

"Dean, nothing's ready. Lucifer is not destroyed, we're living in motels-" Cas took a deep shuddering breath, and squeezed his eyes shut tightly. "This is not how it's supposed to be. The baby will come into this world, and the threats will still be here."

"Cas...don't worry. It'll turn out ok, I promise." Dean pulled Cas closer, and the angel melted in his arms.

"What if it doesn't?" Cas asked softly, his voice without hope. "We don't have anything ready for the baby. What will we do when the child comes, Dean? Wrap it up in motel sheets and tuck it into the back seat of the Impala while we hunt Lucifer?"

"No..no Cas. It won't be like that." Dean stroked Cas' hair lightly, and tried to imagine it not being like that. The goal of destroying Lucifer seemed so far down the road, and the child's birth was looming right up ahead. Cas must have sensed his doubt because he pulled away quickly and gave Dean a hard look.

"Dean, I can read your emotions; I feel your doubt. You don't believe that."

Dean opened his mouth to argue, but knew it was pointless. Cas would know he was lying.

"I just think that we might be cutting it close." he said, choosing his words carefully. He could feel Cas bristling slightly; he knew the angel was upset and wanted to hear genuine reassurance, not the half-hearted crap Dean was offering. Truth was, Dean was nervous as all hell for the kid's arrival and Cas' words were making him panic more.

"Listen, Cas, why don't we go now and get some stuff for the baby?" Dean suggested suddenly, reaching for Cas' hand in the dark. "We'll have some things ready at least."

"What do you mean?" Cas said slowly. "It's late. Everything is closed. If you would have picked things out with me weeks ago in that shop-"

"Well, I didn't and it's over with. But we can do it right now, Cas." Dean grabbed Cas' coat where it was flung over the chair and wrapped it around his shoulders.

Cas was gazing at him with a mixed expression of excitement and apprehension."The angels might find us...and in a few hours we have to-"

"Don't think about that, Cas. Forget everything that's happening right now. It's just you and me, alright? And we're going shoppping for the kid."

Taking Cas' hand, Dean smiled slightly. Their future confrontation with the reaper was weighing on him as well, but he tried to take his own advice. Pretend they were normal..though they were as far from normal as you could get.

"C'mon," Dean said quietly, tugging Cas toward the door and stepping lightly to avoid waking the others.

The angel seemed eager, and it raised Dean's spirits to see him happy. The chill night air blew as Dean closed the door behind them. Cas shivered slightly and Dean wrapped an arm around his shoulder, holding him close.

"Where are we going?" Cas asked as they walked across the motel parkinglot to the Impala. Dean shrugged. "Wherever we want, babe."

He opened the door for Cas, helping him into the passenger seat before getting in himself. Starting up the Impala with a roar, he shot out of the lot, tires burnng rubber. They cruised the dark town roads, going perhaps a little faster then they should have. But it was a freeing sensation. There was no one else about; it was like they had the world to themselves. To put it plainly, it was friggin' awesome.

"Dean," Cas laughed a bit breathlessly as Dean shot around a corner. "You're going too fast,"

"Don't you like it when I go fast?" Dean raised his eyebrows suggestively and Cas reddened even though there was no one else around.

Dean suddenly pointed out the window. "Look. Department store." He eased the car off to the side of the street and parked in front of the building.

"How are we going to get in, Dean? If you haven't forgotten, I have lost my teleportation powers temporarily-" Cas stated as they got out of the car.

"I didn't forget, Cas." Dean took Cas hand and pulled him up to the front door. "I'm going to break in."

"Dean-" Cas started to protest, but the hunter had already started on the lock. After a minute there was a sharp click and Dean pulled the door open with a wide grin.

"There you go. After you, Cas." Dean bowed mockingly to the angel as he stepped inside. Cas rolled his eyes as Dean followed him. The hunter pulled a small flashlight out of his pocket to light their way.

It took them some time to find the section they were looking for; Dean was not one for navigating through department stores, and Cas had practically no experience with shopping. Finally Dean saw racks of baby clothes illuminated in the light of his miniature flashlight and he grinned.

Motioning toward it, he said, "Go ahead, Cas."

The angel walked over to the rack and began thumbing through clothes. Sure they had broken into the store and were shopping in the dark, but still..they were getting things for the baby.

Dean must have sensed Cas' sudden explosion of happiness because he came over, wrapping his arms around Cas from behind. He kissed Cas' neck and whispered, "I do believe everything is gonna be okay, Cas. In the future we're gonna look back on this and wonder how we ever doubted that we would stop the Apocalypse."

"But getting Lucifer back into-" Cas started, but Dean pulled him around, leaning down to capture Cas' lips with his.

"Don't talk about that now. Remember, we're here for the kid, not to discuss our problems, alright?" Dean touched Cas' cheek lightly and the angel nodded. "What are we waiting for then?"

He kissed Cas one more time before turning to the rack and pulling out a small blue onesie. Cas pondered it by the glow of the flashlight before nodding. Dean put it down on top of a changing table and the pile grew as the two went through the rack, picking out gender-neutral clothes.

When Cas had enough of the clothes, Dean tugged him further down the aisle to investigate the other items on the shelves.

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Dean and Cas picked out way more stuff then they could fit in the car, so in the end they only grabbed the clothes and some other smaller essentials like diapers.

Dean threw everything in to a large diaper bag and noticed Cas staring a bit wistfully at everything else they were leaving behind.

"Don't worry, babe. We'll steal the rest on a different night, huh?" Dean gave Cas a playful nudge. "Humanity's way of repaying us for stopping the end of the world."

Cas was quiet, euphoria gone now that the shopping spree was over. Dean's brow furrowed in concern as he sensed Cas' heavy anxiety returning.

"Cas?"

Castiel shook his head; Dean was doing all he could to make Cas' life the best it could be. He had no reason to be upset after Dean brought him out like this, but the world was crashing down upon his shoulders once again.

He reached for Dean's hand, curling his fingers around the hunter's. "We should go, Dean. It's almost time for the summoning."

"Alright." Dean grabbed up the bag and Cas led the way out, trying not to have a breakdown. He knew Dean was confused and didn't know what to say. That was fine with him because he didn't know what to say either.

They reached the exit, and Cas let go of his mate's hand, pushing open the door to reach the cold air that cooled his flushed face.

Dean threw the bag into the trunk of the Imapala while Cas got into the passenger side. Dean slammed the trunk shut, hesitating for a moment before getting into the car. Cas was in a weird moo and he wasn't sure how to go about approaching h im. One minute he's fine..the next all sullen.

The heavy silence in the car on the way back made the ride very uncomfortable, and Dean didn't like it all. He wanted to reach out to Cas, but didn't know what to say. Did he do something?

"It's not you, Dean." Cas said quietly, as though he had read Dean's thoughts. "It's everything else."

Dean reached over to run a hand down Cas' cheek. Cas leaned into the touch, comforted by the warmth. "Hold on to that feeling you had in the store. That happiness. Because when this is over, that's all you're gonna feel. I will do everything to make sure it stays that way for you and the kid, Cas."

"No doubt in your emotions this time, Dean." Cas gave a small smile as Dean pulled into the motel parking lot.

"Nope. None." Dean pulled the key out of the ignition and turned to his mate. Leaning towards the angel, Dean pressed his lips gently against Cas'. The angel closed his eyes and fell into the kiss, wrapping his arms around Dean's neck to pull him closer.

Dean sat up so he was kneeling on the seat and embraced Cas tightly, massaging his swollen belly, carressing every part of the angel's body he could reach. He broke the kiss so they could catch their breaths, and nuzzled his face into Cas' neck, planting soft kisses there instead.

"Dean, I love you so much." Cas whispered.

"I know. We'll get through this, babe. Just take my hand and we'll make it, babe, I swear."

Cas raised his eyebrows slightly. "Did you just quote Bon Jovi?"

Dean shrugged. "Bon Jovi rocks. On occasion." he grinned and leaned down for another heated kiss.

A sharp rap on the window made both men jump, and Dean's heart sky-rocketed from the shock.

"Where have you been, idjits?" Bobby rapped again on the glass. "We need to go, so cut it out. You two are like horny teenagers."

Cas flushed , and even Dean reddened a bit at the comment. Nevertheless, he stole another quick kiss from Cas before getting out of the car.

"Alright then, Bobby. Let's go summon a friggin' Reaper." Dean said, and Bobby rolled his eyes.

"Get inside and help us load up then, will you?" Bobby started back toward the motel, muttering to himself.

Dean grabbed for Cas' hand, and they followed Bobby, their hearts racing with adrenaline as the task of summoning the Reaper loomed in front of them.

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