AN- The sky is dumping about a month's worth of rain in a day here, and I'm cooped up and bored. Therefore, a new chapter appears. So much for spacing these things out again... There is nowhere near a buffer like there was with I2D but eh. YOLO or something.
Lightning sped through the streets, running late as per usual. Serah's house loomed in front of her, and she internally cursed for her terrible sense of timing and ability to get too absorbed into her work. "I'll just finish one report and head off" turned into five, and then before she knew it she was knocking papers everywhere in her office once she realised she was running late. The family dinners were important to Serah, and they had grown significantly in size since Fang and Vanille's return. The pinkette got off her hoverbike and walked briskly towards the house.
Lightning approached the door to hear laughter on the other side. She stopped on the porch for a moment, and held her breath. Work had gotten on top of her over the last few weeks but then again, when did it not? She was nervous about seeing everyone and couldn't pinpoint why. She was worried she was slipping into old habits from keeping her distance and being too involved with work, but none of the usual arguments had surfaced between herself and Serah. Maybe she was overthinking it. Or maybe her sister had her husband to fuss over these days so didn't care. Lightning's stomach sank at the thought, that maybe she was being forgotten about. Or maybe she was forgetting about everyone all over again. Easier to cope with the loneliness when it was from your own doing.
Eventually shaking off the sombre thoughts with a forceful exhale, the soldier knocked on the door to her sister's home. Snow opened it as wide as his grin and held out his hands in welcome. "Sis! Good to see you!"
"I'm not your sister…" Lightning replied automatically. At this point in their lives it no longer holding the threat it once did, and more ran as an ongoing joke between them. She punched him on the shoulder for good measure though, which made her feel better.
The kitchen was a hive of activity, with Vanille and Serah preparing the meal while Yuj and Lebreau assisted them. Hope was sitting at the dining table with Maqui, Sazh and his son chatting away while Snow walked back to the lounge room to continue his beer with Rygdea and Gadot. But it was clear to the pinkette that someone was missing.
"Claire!" Serah dropped her spoon back into the saucepan and ran over to give her sister a hug. "When did you get in?"
Lightning returned her sibling's affection though still mildly distracted. "Last night, I'm on base for the next month at least which is good. I was getting sick of the insects out on the Steppe. Where's Fang?"
She didn't miss the side glance Serah and Vanille shared at the mentioning of the Pulsian's name. "She's upstairs, still getting ready I think, or whatever excuse she's making." The redhead replied with a shrug and went back to focusing on her cooking. "Can you go get her and make sure she actually makes an appearance?"
Lightning shared a momentary look with her sister, and retreated from the kitchen when Serah shook her head. There would be time for private questioning later about whatever was going on between the Oerban siblings. The pinkette made her way up the stairs to where she knew the spare room was, and quietly knocked on the door. When there was no answer, she slowly opened the door to find Fang perched in the middle of the bed. Her tongue poked from her mouth in concentration as she sewed material together, repairing one of her saris.
"Looks a sight better than when you were doing that on me you know," Lightning called out. She watched Fang frown and blink for a couple of seconds, looking mildly disorientated. The brunette's head tilted up to regard her and the pinkette marvelled at how her face lit up in recognition.
"Light! It's so good to see you, Sunshine. Take a seat, I'll be done in a minute."
As she sat down next to the focused Pulsian, she thought back to the last time she saw Fang working with her hands and ran a thumb over the faint scar on her arm.
Sloppy. Too sloppy.
Lightning had narrowly avoided getting shot up by a set of Sanctum velocycles but got mowed down by a "bird-bot" as her new travelling companion referred to them. They were cut off from Snow and Hope, and the pinkette was still mad at the foreign woman for being the catalyst for this whole nightmare they found themselves in.
"Looks nasty, that cut." Fang gestured to it as she knelt down to inspect the wound. Lightning winced and pulled her arm away from the Pulsian as the tanned fingers traced over her skin. The pinkette ran her own hand over the top, trying to call up some healing magic but came up empty.
"Dammit. I'm tapped out." She hissed in pain and slumped back against the wall. Palumpolum was otherwise shut down and they needed to keep moving, but not if she couldn't stop the bleeding.
"Welp, looks like we're going to have to fix this the old-fashioned way." Fang sighed while fishing a small bag off her belt. She took out a linen wrap and a tiny jar, along with a needle and thread.
"If you think you're coming near me with any of that barbaric-"
"Listen here missy," Fang cut her off mid-sentence with a stern gaze. "We don't have time. We don't have time for stubbornness, we don't have time for egos and we definitely don't have time for any of your shit. So shut up, take it like a soldier and have Hope fix you up when we get there or when you have enough juice in your system to heal it. Don't want it to leave a scar on your precious pampered skin."
Fang got to work, opening up the jar and dabbing a gel in and around the cut. Lightning winced but clenched her jaw shut in silence. "It's an antiseptic and numbing agent. It'll help with the pain." The Pulsian said, her tone softer than before, "The gash is nasty, and we'll need to stitch it up." Lightning simply nodded stiffly, remaining silent after her chastising.
The aesthetic gel at least dulled the pain from when the needle started going through her skin, but she still paled at the sight regardless. Lightning wanted to focus on anything else, and looked up at Fang instead. The tip of her tongue was poking out of her mouth as she worked, and she had a calm expression on her face that strangely settled the pinkette. Calm people male less mistakes, after all. "You... Like working with your hands I gather?" She asked idly, blushing a little at the glance behind a raised eyebrow she received when Fang paused in her work.
"Yeah.. It keeps me busy, and mostly out of trouble." She drawled, then returned to her work. "There. Done. Just needs a bandage to keep the dirt out and then you can get it sorted when we meet back up with Hope." Lightning looked down at Fang's handiwork with surprise. For someone she accused of using barbaric methods not five minutes prior, the stitches were neat and closed the wound into a small line. She remained silent as the Pulsian gently wrapped the linen around her arm and tied it off.
A few nights later as the group sat around a fire in the wild untamed lands of Gran Pulse, Fang eyed off the linen still tied off on Lightning's arm. "Hey, that'll scar if you don't get some someone to heal it."
"It's fine." The pinkette shrugged, "I don't mind if it leaves one."
"But why?" Fang asked with a curious expression.
"It's a reminder about different perspectives and... Snap judgements about people."
"You know, you could have always just written yourself a damn note instead of letting that gash scar over.." Fang muttered from her place on the bed and reached over to touch the scar. Lightning looked up from her reflections as she felt tanned fingers run lightly over her arm.
The pinkette smiled and gave her a sly look. "Didn't have time to find a pen and paper."
Fang laughed at the rare treasure that was a joke from the otherwise stoic soldier and placed her work down beside her. "I 'spose I can't put this whole social thing off forever can I?" She said with a sigh. Lightning couldn't help but huff in agreement.
"There's definitely more people showing up to these things than I remember. I think I'd prefer just a nice quiet catch-up over a few drinks."
A smile crossed the Pulsian's face and she nudged the soldier gently. "That an offer for a date, Sunshine?" She said with a grin, enjoying the glare she received as a reply. Fang stood and held out a hand to help Lightning up. The pinkette took it and allowed herself to be pulled up from her spot on the bed. It put her in immediate proximity of the tall woman, and the two stared at each other for longer than a moment until a crash from downstairs had the Pulsian flinch and reel back on reflex.
"Etro's fucking Gate.." She hissed and dug her nails into her palms, willing her frayed nerves to calm and her heart rate to settle down.
"Fang, are you… ok? Really ok?" Lightning hesitantly asked placing a hand on her shoulder. The tanned woman exhaled forcefully and shrugged the hand from her.
"Yeah. Yeah fine just… jumpy. That's all. Didn't sleep well."
"Do you ever?" Lightning whispered, moving closer. She could feel the warmth emanating from Fang, and looked down to see her shaking hands. "I'm worried about you, you know."
Jade eyes stared off to the side, feigning eye contact. Fang wasn't interested in worry, or pity. It made her feel weak, weaker than she already felt. "I'm fine, Light. Let's go do this social… Whatever, ok?" She said firmly, turning on her heel and heading downstairs before the pinkette could press her for any further information. Lightning stared after her with a clench of her fist and followed out of the room.
She chose to remain close to Fang for the evening, feeling unconsciously protective of her restless friend. The Pulsian flinched at every loud noise, sudden movement and touch from anyone else at the table. Which, Lightning noted with vague interest, she didn't seem to do as much with any physical contact from her. Fang was withdrawn from the conversation, staring off into space and only interacting to a minimal extent. Vanille kept staring at her from across the table, equal parts frustrated and worried.
"So Vanille? I hear Academia has a consultant position for you over the next few months? How exciting is that?" Lebreau asked from the other end of the table. Vanille looked mildly nervous as her eyes darted between her sister and the dark-haired woman.
"Yes! It's only for a few months, but I'm looking forward to it." She replied, forcing cheer into her voice.
"So nice of you to tell me before you accepted it..." Fang muttered under her breath, but it was loud enough for Lightning to hear. The pinkette reached under the table and put her hand on Fang's leg, almost on instinct knowing it would be bouncing restlessly. The muscles tensed then relaxed immediately under her touch, and the Pulsian's jaw clenched tight. Lightning left her hand there, unconsciously stroking the skin with her thumb while Vanille and the others chatted away.
"We can talk about it later," She whispered as the conversation picked up around them, "You can rant and yell and swear all you like. Just not here, not now. You'll regret it."
"Speaking from personal experience are we?" Fang hissed back, glaring holes into Vanille's head as she ground her teeth. Lightning gave her a firm look and set her jaw.
"You know I am." She replied sternly, and squeezed Fang's knee before retracting her hand. The brunette immediately felt the loss, and it hurt her heart even more to feel that way. She gritted her teeth to force the tears back that stung at her eyes, and hunched over the table, idly stabbing at her food with her fork.
The others were animatedly discussing their journey, sharing stories of their first time here on Gran Pulse to those in the room that weren't with them. Snow was telling a particularly humorous story about how Sazh was chasing a tiny cactaur around the Steppe, intent on catching it. Everyone at the table was laughing, except for two people. Lightning was watching the expression on Fang's face noticeably darken. Before she could attempt to intervene, the Pulsian slammed her hands down on the table and stood, startling everyone and silencing the room.
"I've had enough." She snapped, and kicked the chair back from behind her legs which sent it falling to the floor.
"Fang! We were just telling stories…" Vanille said with a pout.
"Yes, let's all make light of the race against the clock where we had to destroy the world in order to stop from spending eternity as hideous monsters. Fabulous. And then how we saved those ungrateful Cocoonians only to take a glass nap for three years and watch them move onto Gran Pulse and spread. Yep. Laughter all round."
Lightning stood up and put a hand on Fang's arm to attempt to calm her, but it had the opposite effect. She flung her arm back with a growl, only narrowly avoiding hitting the pinkette in the process. "Don't touch me." She snarled and stalked out of the room. The silence left a void in her wake, shattered only as the front door slammed a few minutes later. Vanille was tearing up and Serah put an arm over her shoulder while giving her sister a pointed look. Lightning took the hint and excused herself from the table to chase after Fang.
The Pulsian was already halfway out of the village by the time Lightning had caught up with her. "Would you slow down already? Hey!" She called out after her, but the pace didn't slow. Fang's lance was attached to her belt and she carried a small rucksack on her back. "Fang, wait… Please?" Lightning implored in the hopes she would finally stop moving and she could find out what was going on. The pleading tone was enough to tug at the brunette's heart long enough to still her movements. She stopped in the middle of the road, staring straight ahead.
"Fang, what's going on with you?" Lightning didn't know why she was hurting to see her friend this way, but it clutched at her chest and threatened to overwhelm her. "Talk to me... Please..."
"I can't."
"Why?" Lightning moved around to face the Pulsian, and was struck with the view of her in the dim light. Her teeth were clenched and tears ran down her face. The pinkette reached out but didn't touch her friend, considering the earlier reaction. "Fang.."
"Just leave it, Light. I need to get some air it's…. too loud here. Don't follow me."
Fang continued on down the path out of New Bodhum, leaving the Lightning staring after her.
Once more tied up with work, Lightning hadn't spoken to anyone since the dinner a few weeks back. She was intent on giving Fang the space requested, but couldn't help but feel lonely without seeing or hearing from her. Something was clearly going on with the Pulsian, but until she was ready to speak Lightning didn't know what else to do. "I should at least check in to make sure she's ok…" She thought to herself as she got dressed.
She'd barely been home a day after being called out on a mission again on the Steppe. The pinkette found herself looking out across the plains often while away, hoping she would see her friend out hunting. After a couple of early attempts at messages checking in went unanswered she gave up, feeling like it was only causing more harm than good at that point.
Still, her thoughts drifted to Fang more often than not. Lightning thought the frequency would have died down now that she was out of Crystal stasis with Vanille, but if anything they'd just gotten more intense. She slowly realised that Fang was serving as a lifeline for her, helping keep her demons at bay whenever she was around the brunette. She didn't feel so lonely and directionless when she was around the Pulsian, the warmth creeping into her heart signalling that it was still in there, beating away whenever Fang was around.
But she felt ashamed of her distant nature, even though it was always how she dealt with her feelings. After her parents died, after losing Serah and being branded... After they saved Cocoon and she lost Fang... The self-imposed isolation was a way of protecting herself against further anxiety, but with how Fang exploded at the dinner and disappeared from the village, Lightning shifted uncomfortably as she became worried over the true cost of her own distance.
She quietly made herself a coffee as she got ready for work and cursed when her ringing phone pierced the silence of her morning routine. She was going to ignore it until she saw the caller ID and thought better of it.
"Vanille? What can I do for you?"
"Oh, hey Lightning, I haven't called at a bad time have I?" The redhead's usually cheery voice sounded a bit anxious and it immediately got the soldier's hackles up.
"No, I'm just getting ready for work. Is everything alright?"
There was a brief silence on the end of the line as Vanille took a breath. "It's Fang. I haven't... I haven't heard from her since just after the dinner. She... Hasn't been home."
Lightning stopped in her paces and gripped the phone tighter. Her heart suddenly hammered in her ears. "Vanille, that was nearly three weeks ago. Why am I only hearing about this now?"
"You've been really busy with work and I just thought she needed space, go hunting and then she'd come back. Lightning, I don't think she had been... Adjusting to life outside of stasis. All we've ever done is fight or run. I'm not sure she knows how to live a life without either of those things, so she's… Vanished."
Lightning swore under her breath and tried not to take her anger out on the smaller woman. "I have an idea as to where she's gone, I'll go check it out and get back to you." She abruptly hung up on Vanille before the redhead could squeak out her thanks and dialled her office to call in a favour. Needless to say Amodar had no issues with her taking the day off, and encouraged her to attempt to take the whole week.
Hanging up the phone, it was tempting to throw it across the room in anger. Three weeks. Three weeks. "Three goddamn weeks. Are you kidding me?" Lightning yelled at the empty room around her. But, try as she might, she couldn't bring herself to be mad at Vanille. It wasn't her fault. If anything, the only person she could blame was staring at her from the hallway mirror. Her heart rattled against her rib cage as she tried to calm her breathing. What if something has happened to her friend? She swore at herself when she realised something has been happening to her friend, and once again the pinkette had isolated herself from the people she cared about.
She grabbed what remained of her gear and jumped on the hover out the front of her house, speeding off in the direction of the only place she would know Fang would go.
Home.