AN - I should be in bed. Probably in bed. It's a work-night and also midnight so definitely should be in bed. But I stumbled upon a new band and have been listening to the same three tracks over and over because they're amazing. You know what that's like, right? I'm really bad at being an adult. So fuck it, yet another chapter.

"Salvation is borne of sacrifice… Miracles of misery… from shattered shards a new crystal legend shall arise!"

Can't breathe. Such pain. The others… Cie'th… Gone… I'll kill him… I'll…

"Despair. Despair and save us all!"

Body wracked with pain. Rage. Fire. I've failed… I've failed and lost them all.

They're gone. They're all gone and it's because of me. I am powerless. I can't save them. I can't… I…

"Fang!"

Light..? But you're…

"Fang wake up! Fang!"

Gone… I've lost you…

"Fang!" Lightning shook the Pulsian frantically by the shoulders, silently praying to Etro that she'd wake up. The ear-piercing scream of agony had woken the pinkette with a panicked start and she raced into the spare room to find her friend thrashing amongst the furs. "Come on, wake up, it's not real!"

"NO!" Fang screamed and sat bolt upright from her spot on the floor, reaching out to fend off whatever demons she was facing in her sleep.

"Hey, hey it's ok. It's ok Fang. It was only a dream. Come on now… Just breathe… You're here, you're safe... Just breathe…" Lightning moved behind Fang and wrapped her arms around her from behind to keep out of reach of her clawing limbs. She whispered assurances in her ear repeatedly to try to get her to calm down.

"L..Light?" Fang rasped in a panicked voice, still disoriented and trying to get her bearings. "Wh-what… Where.. Light.. No.."

"It's ok, I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. I'm here." She ran a hand through the brunette's hair, getting the damp locks out of her face. Fang turned around and clutched at Lightning's face, as if to prove to herself she was real. She tried desperately to calm her hammering heart, to still her racing breath. The pinkette pulled her into a tight hug, and Fang buried herself in the crook of the pale neck while she struggled to regain composure.

"Etro… I was… back there… so… So real… I thought I'd… Lost you again… Lost all of you…"

"You haven't Fang. You won't lose any of us."

They sat in silence for some time, with the pinkette refusing to let the Fang go. She brushed the dark hair with her fingers, letting her nails run along the Pulsian's scalp. How long had this been going on for? How long had this been carried within her? It wouldn't be beyond the realm of reason that this wasn't just about the War of Revelations, but her time before as well. Lightning sighed and kept a hold of her friend, trying not to let the guilt overwhelm her. That she had allowed herself to get such distance between... No, she couldn't think like that. That line of thinking wouldn't end anywhere productive.

"Fang," she asked after she felt the brunette finally relax in her arms, "Do you have nightmares often?"

The brunette hung her head and sighed. "Only... Every night since I came back."

"I see. Come on. You're coming with me." Lightning stood and pulled her friend up by the hands with barely a squawk of protest from her. She led Fang into the bedroom and pushed her onto the bed. "No more chivalrous crap. Get under the covers and go to sleep where I can keep an eye on you."

Fang awkwardly clambered into bed and pulled the thick covers over her. She could feel the warmth of Lightning lying next to her, and was very aware of her presence. She stared at the ceiling, feeling a little lost and unsure of herself considering that she'd unwillingly subjected her friend to two breakdowns in one night. She felt uncomfortable by the notion that she had to have someone "keep an eye on her", but at least that someone was a stoic soldier who hadn't once passed judgement on any of her behaviours. Still, how far had she fallen into the pit of despair that someone as ice cold as Lightning Farron was showing care?

Lightning shifted around, facing towards the Pulsian. "It's no different to when we were up near the Springs, isn't it? I can tell you're still awake, Fang. Just clear your mind and go to sleep. The world will-"

"-Still be there tomorrow," Fang called out to the stoic soldier who had refused to budge from her place by the edge of their camp. Teeth chattering in her head, Lightning pulled her cape around her to stay warm. Sulyya was certainly a beautiful sight during the day, but once the sun fell below the horizon it turned into a freezer, with the water bringing an icy chill to the platform they had climbed to in order to make camp away from the amphibious wildlife.

The others had taken up residence by the fire, pairing off to stay warm. Snow had taken off his large trench coat and covered himself and Hope with it, as had Sazh and his large pilot's jacket with Vanille. That only left Fang, who was currently staring hard at her from across their meagre fire.

"You don't need to stay up on watch love, the lizards can't climb, and the birds can't get through the caves to get here. We're safe, and you need sleep. You look freezing."

"I'm f-f-fine." Lightning responded through gritted teeth. Fang raised an eyebrow at her, looking entirely unconvinced.

"Yep, looking real fine." Fang drawled, as she got up and started to disrobe. She carefully took her sari off and unfurled it a little more to give them a makeshift blanket. Lightning reluctantly staggered over to the brunette, her limbs locked from the cold. She unbuttoned her cape and placed it over the top of the sari so it would lay across them both. The pinkette took a moment for a wayward thought to float through her mind about the complementary colours, and laid down close to Fang. The cape only barely covered their top halves - the sari only slightly more than that - and Lightning shivered against the ground.

"Etro, Light. It's like you've never had to bunk before. They never teach you about sharing body warmth back at your army school or whatever?"

"We never… Had to worry about weather like… This… Fal'Cie saw to it." Lightning growled as she watched the mist dance in the air from her own breath. "Besides, shouldn't you be sharing with Vanille?"

Fang rolled her eyes at the stubborn woman beside her and grabbed her around the waist to pull her in close. Lightning had to suppress a squeak as she was dragged over, and held her breath as she internally fought against the extremely close proximity of another person. Beyond Serah, she'd never let anyone within arm's length since her parents died, let alone within a breath of each other. "We all figured that if you shared with Snow he'd be food for Bismarck, Hope would probably die of shock and Sazh just said 'no way am I sleeping next to someone that's always on a hair trigger. I'll get my head cut off if I snore'. Which leaves your two resident locals, and Vanille doesn't have enough warmth in her to melt that ice that you're made of. So I volunteered." She said, punctuating the last few words deliberately and ran her tongue along her bottom lip. The pinkette's eyes darted down to follow it's path, her heartbeat quickening.

"Just relax Sunshine… It's not going to help your muscles staying tense like that, and that will lead to you making mistakes on the field. I'm not going to bite. At least, not when the others are around.." Fang dared to chance a once over of Lightning's form with a sly grin. The glare she received in return was palpable. Lightning rolled over uncomfortably until she was facing away from Fang, but that only served to have her pulled flush against the Pulsian. She held her breath when she realised the tanned hand hadn't moved from her stomach and was even beginning to trail gentle circles across her skin. Her heart sped up whenever Fang was looking at her, and had been doing it ever since Palumpolum.

"I can tell you're still awake, Lightning. Just clear your mind and go to sleep."

Being pressed up against the Pulsian who had a surprising amount of warmth wasn't helping her clear her mind any, but the patterns Fang was drawing on her with her nails was making her sleepy at least. She found herself focusing on the tanned arm she found around her waist, resting across her stomach. It felt comforting in a strange way; that maybe for once someone was there to look out for her so she didn't have to.

The world will still be there in the morning. Goddess she hopes so.

The early dawn had sunlight creep slowly through the gaps in the curtains, which drew Lightning into awareness. The first thing she noticed was how warm she was, and how she'd managed to have a solid night sleep for the first time in ages. She was still half asleep when she realised that there was an additional weight on her chest, and when she opened her eyes she saw the wild hair in her vision and froze. Fang- true to her word- was pulled up close to Lightning; limbs intertwined with her head pressed into her chest.

She felt herself unconsciously reaching out to touch the brunette's unkempt hair as she felt Fang nestle further into her. Lightning inhaled sharply and the nuzzling stopped mid-movement, however, and the soldier knew she was awake.

"Uh. Morning, Light." She mumbled from her spot in the pinkette's cleavage. "This... This is awkward isn't it?"

"Yep."

Fang delicately extracted herself from Lightning's chest and coughed nervously. "I am... So sorry..."

Lightning shrugged from where she lay and allowed herself a moment to sit up to stretch before getting out of bed. Fang's mouth went dry watching the arch of the pinkette's spine and she spun around to face the window to save what little dignity she had left, lest she be caught gawking. She heard the woman get out of bed and turned to find a very still sleepy and grumpy looking Farron.

"Hey Light, I just wanted to apo-mmph!" Fang was cut off mid-sentence by Lightning's fingers over her mouth. She stared wide-eyed at the pinkette who was now upright but still had her eyes half closed.

"Shut up. Coffee first."

After a very silent breakfast, Lightning excused herself to go have a shower and get changed. Fang already looked better after a night with her, but that wasn't to say she was out of the woods yet. She recalled the expression on the tanned face when she groggily opened her eyes that morning; smooth and surprisingly peaceful, and not the permanent scowl that had fixed itself to Fang's face since she awoke for the second time from crystal stasis.

She felt like her lower abdomen was doing flips when she thought about how they woke up together, and she was troubled that she wanted to do it again. Lightning thought back to what the Pulsian had told her at the barracks a few weeks ago, about her penchant for bedding members of the same sex. It wasn't unheard of for the pinkette; Cocoon's pampered lifestyle meant that people didn't tend to have much emphasis on relationship expectations. It wasn't common, but wasn't entirely unheard of. She was always working so never spared much thought beyond a few hookups in training and a date or three in high school. Perhaps the reason Lightning spluttered that day was more because it meant that Fang wasn't entirely messing around with her flirtations during their journey. Though given their brief history before the Fall, she couldn't honestly say she was surprised.

Aboard the Palamecia, Lightning and the others were fighting through squad after squad of Psicom military feeling like they'd made little progress. Fang was focused and ploughing through them like they were nothing but flecks of dust. Her rage was substantial and her fighting fierce. At one point they had split up with Snow and Hope taking one track in an attempt to divide the enemy numbers, which had helped a little but not enough to stem the tide.

The two women had paused in an alcove for a breather while alarms blared all around them. A small bottle was thrust into Lightning's face from the Pulsian, wiggling it a little in offering. She reluctantly took it and drank the contents, noticing Fang's eyes raking over her form.

"What?" She asked, lowering the bottle with suspicion. The Pulsian grinned slyly and shrugged.

"Nothin' much. Just thinking about how beautiful the view is up here."

Lightning's eyes narrowed and she tossed the bottle back. "We're not here to admire the view aboard the airship Fang, we're here to get Sazh and Vanille, and get out."

Fang's quiet laughter was just barely audible over the hum of the engines and the blaring alarm. She peered out from the corner to check if the coast was clear, and Lightning walked past her into the open to continue on. Keen ears honed from years of battlefield and hunting heard another approaching squad, however, and Fang gripped Lightning by the wrist and pulled her back into the recess.

"What are you d-!" Fang placed a hand over her mouth to silence her with a fierce gaze. She pressed up against her close as the Psicom operatives raced past, still and unmoving.

"Where are they? The security footage had them coming down this corridor!"

Lightning went to reach for her weapon but Fang shook her head, and slowly took her hand away from the pinkette's mouth, bringing a finger up to her own lips as a reminder to stay quiet. Moments passed that felt like hours as the Psicom soldiers checked their surroundings before moving on.

Both women were breathing heavily from adrenaline, still pressed up against one another. Lightning felt tense and uncomfortable; not because of the close proximity of the Pulsian per se, but more that her body wasn't reflexively punching her for the physical contact. Her skin heated at the feeling of Fang's arms either side of her that pinned her in place against the wall in the shadows. She felt the tall woman's leg in between her own and swallowed hard. Fang leant back a little to peek out of their hiding spot, then smiled as she turned back to the pinkette.

"So," She drawled with another indulgent and appreciative gaze, "Come here often?"

Getting back to business, Lightning gathered her wits about her and shoved her back. The Pulsian had been pushing her buttons since they met in Palumpolum, and she wasn't sure if she wanted to punch her or-

Lightning stilled her thoughts as she finished getting changed, her phone ringing providing an ample distraction from her contemplation. "Rygdea, what's up?"

"Hey, pinky!" He cheered down the phone. Lightning winced and pulled the phone away from her ear with a scowl. "Patrol reported you came back last night with your Pulsian friend in tow. Is Fang with you at your place? One of the boys found something on a mission we want her to have a look at."

"Now's not really a good time…" The pinkette trailed off as she walked into the lounge room to find Fang sitting on the ground before the large window to the deck. She was humming to herself as she sat with a straight back and arms resting on her legs. The melody was almost haunting in its long notes and Fang's husky voice echoed off the walls of the empty room. Lightning couldn't help but stare, the Pulsian still hadn't changed and was still in nothing but her tight black shorts and the matching bra that she wore beneath her sari.

"You there pinky?" Rygdea's voice chirped down the phone, startling Lightning and making her juggle the phone for a moment. She cursed as she caught it again and pulled it back up to her ear, seeing Fang turn her head slightly and watch her from the corner of her eye.

"Yes. I am here. Like I said, now isn't a good time I… I have to go furniture shopping today." Laughter rang from the man and she knew it was a poor excuse. He paused mid-breath however and grew silent.

"Wait… Furniture… Amodar told me your sister moved out months ago! Don't tell me you still haven't fixed your place up, Light?"

Lightning winced at Rygdea's tone as Fang stood and started moving into stretches, once more drawing the pinkette's gaze back to her. "I've… been busy…" She offered weakly, feeling like her eyes were about to fall out of her head when Fang bent forward to touch her toes and stretch out her calves. She was beginning to think that it was less a poor time for interruptions for Fang, and more about interruptions for her.

"Tell you what- We've gotta make a run back to Cocoon today, let me come bring this thing over the boys found, and we'll go swing past your old place in Bodhum and see if we can salvage anything to save you some cash. Text me your address up there and we'll be back by the evening."

He hung up before she could protest, and she lowered her phone and stared at it blankly for a moment. A shadow cast over the screen, and she rose her eyes to meet Fang smiling at her. "Sounds like he had you over a barrel there love."

"He's… going to do me a favour in return for getting you to have a look at an artefact his team found on a patrol. I tried to tell him to go away because you're… not up for visitors." She replied, averting her gaze. Tanned fingers drew her phone out of her hands and closed it slowly, green eyes never leaving her face.

"I'm not a complete social invalid at this point Sunshine, I can see what his patrol found without collapsing in a screaming heap," Fang said sadly, a hurt expression on her face.

"That's not what I-" Lightning cut herself off as she gripped Fang's arm suddenly. "I didn't mean it like…. I'm sorry I…" She suddenly stopped, took a deep breath and hung her head. "I'm sorry. I just… Got you back."

The Pulsian raised an eyebrow at her demeanour, the notorious ice queen reduced to stumbling over her own tongue in a panic. Fang sighed with a shake of her head, realising that her friend was speaking from a place of care and not doubt. While it was still a little frustrating, she knew that the soldier had a point. Clapping her hand on the pinkette's arm, she waited until the darting cerulean eyes settled down and made eye contact again.

"You've got me Light, I'm not going anywhere."

Vanille had come over that night as well along with Rygdea to check in on her sister, and she would admit with a tiny amount of curiousity over his squad's find. The two Pulsians stared at each other for a moment before the redhead leapt forward and crushed her sibling in a hug. Fang wrapped her arms around her and held Vanille's head close. "I am so sorry missy.." She whispered into her hair.

"No, I'm sorry Fang. I should have noticed sooner... I should have…" Vanille was hushed as they continued to embrace, before finally letting each other go. Fang still held onto her sister by the shoulders and smiled.

"You'll make me so proud in Academia, you know that right?"

They continued talking for a while as Lightning watched on, barely listening to a word Rygdea was saying to her in the interim. He snapped his fingers in front of her face and copped a reflex punch in the chest as a response.

"Sorry. You should know by now not to do that."

The Calvary leader rubbed his chest and coughed. "Yeah, no shit. Anyway, we couldn't salvage much that unfortunately hasn't been looted but you've at least got a table, chairs and a couch now, it's a start. The boys picked up a TV and a coffee table for you as thanks for the hospitality in town."

Lightning shrugged and clasped her hand on his shoulder. "It's saved me some time and, you know. Nice to have some of my stuff back. Thanks." Their attention drew back to the hushed conversation the Pulsian siblings were having. Fang's eyes darted up to meet the pinkette's cerulean gaze, wide and intense.

"Senechi, 'Nille!" She hissed at her sister, willing her to be quiet.

"Ni'id Fang! Raa zen fehat'xu… I've been reading up on it, it makes the most sense considering what you've been through."

The brunette scowled at Vanille, folding her arms in a defensive gesture. "There's nothing wrong with my head 'Nille, aside from the few screws loose I'm-"

"I swear to Etro I will hit you if you tell me you're fine. There's nothing wrong if you are with fehat'xu Fang... It just means we at least have a path we can take to get you well. Don't fall into the same trap of our ancestors when you can be well right here, right now, with us. Promise me you'll try."

Fang sagged her shoulders and sighed. "I'll try 'Nille. I can only try. Oi, Sparkles- what's this thing you and the boys had to show me?" She called out behind her to the two soldiers observing the exchange. Lightning's eyebrows rose and she stared at Rygdea.

"… Sparkles?"

He shrugged as he fished out a case from his bag. "It was her way of trying to get me to stop calling her girly. It didn't work."

The Pulsians came over to inspect the engraved case, with the brunette's tanned fingers running over the surface. "It looks like it's from the Rayn Clan 'Nille, what do you think?" Vanille nodded and fiddled with a few of the engravings until she heard a click and the top come loose.

"Definitely Rayn." She muttered as she opened the lid, eyes widening as the others leant over. Fang took one look at the contents and cursed.

"Bloody scribes, always have to be writing shit down. Didn't they get the message about not transcribing maps?"

Lightning looked at the small roll inside with interest. "A map? I thought you said the clans prohibited them so they don't wind up in the wrong hands."

"Yeah, it's in pieces and encoded though so at least that's something. It'll take a while to decipher. Hey 'Nille, you think I could hang onto it and decode it? It'll give me something… Else… To think about. Keep me busy, you know?" The redhead thought about it for a moment and nodded. She closed the case again and showed her sister the engravings that hid the locking mechanisms, and then put it down on the nearby bench. "That is of course if it's ok with you Rygdea.." She added. He shrugged and advised it wasn't his property to keep, but if they could make any sense out of it to pass the info on to the Guardian Corps. Lightning fixed up coffees for everyone and a tea for Vanille, as the general consensus was that she was hyper enough and didn't need the encouragement. She watched Fang as she talked with her sibling and Rygdea, the brunette seemed a little calmer now that she had patched things up with her sister.

After Vanille had promised to check in with them before she left for Academia in a few days and took her leave with Rygdea, Lightning and Fang settled in once more for the evening. Not even taking chances, the pinkette just gestured to her room with a quirk of her eyebrow. They still didn't have a spare bed and after last night's disturbed rest, she'd rather put up with Fang sharing a bed than being woken and spending half the night crouched on the ground trying to calm her down. The Pulsian ducked her head, still feeling a little embarrassed but grateful that her friend cared. They laid in bed side by side, both staring up at the ceiling deep in thought.

"Hey, Fang?" Lightning called out, "What was that earlier you were discussing with Vanille? Seemed important."

There was a noticed hesitation before responding. "It wasn't… too important… what makes you say that?"

Lightning turned over and could just faintly make out the brunette's profile. "Because when you don't want me to know something you always switch to speaking in your native language." Busted.. Fang thought to herself. She fidgeted and played with the edges of the quilt, unsure of how to respond. "What did Vanille mean when she said you were. With… Feh-hart zoo?" The Pulsian winced at the terrible pronunciation and turned to face Lightning as well.

"Fehat'xu… It means… hm. 'Endless battle' is I suppose the closest I can come to translating it. Some of the warriors in our village had it. If they made it into their old age which was rare, most if not all would suffer from it. It was like their minds were always still in the thick of it, in the heat of battle, and they couldn't switch off from it. They'd be in two places at once- wherever they were in the village, but at the same time reliving something on the field."

Lightning reached out in the darkness to find Fang's hand and clasped it gently. "What you're describing is post-traumatic stress, Fang."

"So you vipers have a name for it too huh?" The woman chuckled. Lightning squeezed her hand and smiled despite herself.

"I did some research on it while you were in stasis… Because of um… Similar symptoms." Fang had better night vision than the pinkette and could see her take a shuddering breath and close her eyes. "Maybe we can… help each other through it. Neither of us are alone, not anymore." Lightning opened her eyes and searched for Fang in the dark. She could just make out her eyes.

"We will Sunshine. We will."