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Chapter 49
Amber was screaming at Bobby when they walked in, and Dean furrowed his brows, glancing at Castiel. The other man just shook his head, walking past Dean.
He didn't feel like talking to or seeing anyone but he could hear Kam crying again. The screaming had probably woken him up.
Entering the living room, Cas saw Sam on the couch rubbing his temple with one hand while the other patted Kam gently, trying to quiet him. Amber and Bobby were having their screaming match in the kitchen.
"You've been on their cases since you found out about their relationship!"
"I've just been trying to get them to realize that life isn't perfect." Bobby retorted. "What does this have to do with anything?"
"Because you had no right to say that to Cas. You saw how upset he got. God only knows where he went."
Bobby snorted. "Probably to clear his head. He can't really do anything else anymore."
"Neither can I." Amber screamed and there was the sound of a plate smashing on the ground. "You think you know everything! You don't!"
Sam looked up wearily as a shadow fell across him. Cas was standing above him, stony-faced. "Cas! You okay? Where did you go?"
Cas bent without a word, and scooped Kam up in his arms. Sam grabbed his shoulder. "Wait. I'm sorry about Bobby-"
"Dean's back." Cas interrupted him, pulling out of his grasp to straighten up. He left the room without another word. He felt a bit guilty about being callous with Sam; the younger Winchester had done nothing to him, but he was not in the mood to talk.
Sam looked up and saw Dean frozen in the doorway, his eyes locked in the direction that the screaming was coming from. Jerking his head to the kitchen, he gave Sam a questioning glance.
"What's all that about?"
"What the hell happened to you?" Sam ignored Dean's question. He got up to examine Dean closely. "Who busted your nose?"
"Michael." Dean said. "Never mind that. What happened here? What did Bobby do?"
Sighing, Sam rolled his eyes. "Being Bobby. Basically he blamed Cas for your abduction and told him that he would never have a normal life."
"And called him useless?" Dean guessed, referring the Bobby's words that he had just overheard.
"Not in those words, but yeah."
Sam could practically fell the anger radiating from Dean. Bobby's words were hurtful and not warranted, but he had to admit that they were true to some respect.
"Dean..what happened with the angels?" Sam prodded, trying to move on from their current subject. They didn't need any more fighting then there already was.
"Michael was a dick." Dean indicated his neck and nose. "Then God came back and Michael let me go."
"What?" Sam's eyes widened, but Dean was already heading to the kitchen to confront Bobby. "Dean, wait-"
Amber and Bobby were glaring daggers at each other, but both looked up when Dean came in, Sam hot on his tail.
Bobby was smiling at the sights of the Winchesters, but it faded quickly when he saw the expression on Dean's face.
"I don't know why you have to make us miserable all the time. It is because we're happy?" Dean asked quietly.
Frowning, Bobby looked at him. "What are you talking about?"
"Why can't you just leave Cas alone? Sam told me what you said, and I heard you in here...he's still adjusting to being a human, damn it! So he lost his grace, was that all he was to you? A heavenly weapon? Because he's alot more then that. I promised him that we would have a better life, and I will do everything in my power to make that true, for him and for me. Don't tell him it will never happen. Don't we deserve it? Cas friggin' died to save this damn planet and didn't think twice about it. So why can't you give us the benefit of the doubt and try to help instead of criticizing and calling Cas useless?"
Bobby stared at the younger hunter, who turned and left without another word. He cared about Dean and Cas and he was only trying to help. He was telling them the truth because he didn't want them to let their guard down. Although he admitted that perhaps he was a bit harsh with Castiel...everything he said could have probably been communicated better.
"Are you happy now?" Amber shook her head and walked to Sam's side.
"Did he say what happened?" Bobby asked Sam, ignoring Amber's question.
"Michael had him. He must have broken Dean's nose and did whatever else to him. Dean said that God came back and Michael stopped." Sam shrugged. "I don't know how he knows it was God, but then Cas said God brought him back too. Maybe God really is back and he's going to take over again. Which would probably be a good thing."
"If God is back then that would solve the angel problems. Obviously he wants them to leave Dean alone if he had Michael release him." Amber said softly, but was speaking more to Sam then Bobby.
Sam ran a hand through his hair with frustration. "Look, this isn't going to help anything."
Amber and Bobby looked at him with confusion. "What?" they said in unison.
"The fighting. We ended the fighting out there, but now we're fighting amongst ourselves. It's not good. We need to stick together. I think that you" Sam looked at Bobby meaningfully. "Should talk to Cas and apologize. It won't do them any good if they feel like you're against them."
Shifting uncomfortably, Bobby grunted. "Maybe I'll go up later after they've calmed down a bit."
Sam nodded and clapped Bobby on the shoulder. "Thank you. I know you mean well, but things could have probably been said better, and under better circumstances."
Bobby grumbled out a yes. He was the oldest one here; why did he feel like a young child being reprimanded? Never the less he did realize that he had been wrong and now he had to make it right. If it wasn't too late.
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"Cas?" Dean knocked gently on the guest room door. It was the only closed door upstairs so Dean assumed that's where Cas was. "Can I come in?"
There was no answer, so Dean pushed the door open slowly, clicking it back into place behind him. Cas was lying on the bed, stroking Kam's cheek, who was beside him. Dean laid next to Cas, who was facing the opposite way, and wrapped an arm around Cas' chest, holding him close.
"We should take care of that nose, Dean." Cas said softly, his eyes trained on his son.
"It doesn't hurt as much now." Dean kissed Cas' neck, trailing his way up to his jaw. Cas closed his eyes, the gentle kisses more then welcome.
"What happened, Dean? With the angels? What did they do to you?"
"You know it wasn't your fault, right Cas?" Dean breathed in his ear.
Cas snorted. "Who says?"
"I say."
Cas turned over so he was face to face with Dean. Their eyes met, and Dean pressed his lips to Cas'. "Don't listen to Bobby, Cas. Whatever he said to you..it doesn't matter. What matters is what we want, alright?"
"Dean..he's right. There will always be something after us. Demons, for what we did to Lucifer. Angels, for screwing up the 'destinies'. I can't help...I can't do anything."
"I can teach you how to hunt like a human. You don't need your Grace to be a good hunter, Cas. I'll teach you everything I know." Dean brushed Cas' cheek with his fingertips and smiled. "We won't have to worry about the angels anymore, either."
"They came once, they will come again. I don't know you got away, but you might not always be so lucky, Dean."
Dean was about to tell Cas the whole story, but Kam interrupted. He made a small noise and Cas sat up to pick him up and move him so he was lying between his fathers. Lying back down, Cas sighed softly. One hand stayed on top of Kam's belly protectively.
"Maybe it would have better if we never got involved, Dean. If I just stayed away. Things would be different..better for you. I was an angel, you're a hunter...maybe this wasn't meant to be."
The words made everything else disappear from Dean's head. They swirled around his thoughts, and the desperate tone in which they had been spoken echoed over and over in his mind.
Cupping Cas' chin, Dean raised his face so he would look up. "Don't you dare say that, Cas. I don't regret being with you at all. You are the best thing that's ever hapened to me. I love you, Cas. This was meant to be, no matter what we are."
Tears stung Cas' eyes and he blinked to stop them from escaping. "I don't know, Dean."
"Baby...I know you don't really mean that. What you're feeling is guilt and you're putting yourself down and blaming yourself for things that weren't your fault. I don't like it, and I want you to stop."
Resting his forehead against Cas', Dean breathed deeply. "I want you to focus on the life that we want, Cas. We can do it, and we will do it. I promise."
"I'm sorry, Dean..I just feel like things would be less complicated if I just stayed where I was supposed to stay. I was a good soldier. It was what I was made to do. I feel empty now."
"If you stayed in Heaven, Sam would probably be dead, if he even succeeded in taking Lucifer out. I would be miserable. We wouldn't have Kamael. Are you saying that's what you wish would have happened instead?"
Cas shifted uncomfortably. "No. I don't know what I mean."
He laid his hand over Kam's tiny one. "I know I would never give Kam up, for anything."
"I understand what you're saying, how you feel. You feel useless and unneeded. But you are needed, Cas. If you weren't around I'd be falling apart. You brought Kam here..you brought new life and joy."
Cas opened his mouth to argue, but Dean stopped him with a kiss. "Just shut up. I don't care what you say, Cas. I know the truth. I know that we love each other and that's the end of the story. That's it."
Cas smiled, and Dean brushed a hand through Cas' hair, resting it on the back of his head. Reaching up, Cas brushed his fingers against Dean's nose. The blood had dried and was caked on now.
"I really want to clean you up, Dean." he whispered. "It looks like it's starting to swell up."
"Probably is. I'll have two black eyes, too, I guarantee it."
Their lips met again, and the kiss was gentle but full of passion. Dean ran a hand under Cas' shirt and he shivered under the touch.
Kam let out a soft cry, a small hand gripping weakly at Cas' shirt, looking for something to suckle. Dean regretfully pulled his hand off of Cas' smooth skin so he could sit up.
"He's hungry, Dean." Cas picked Kam up, cradling the baby in his arms. Kam sniffled but there were no tears. Moving to the door, Cas glanced quickly at Dean. "Please..come down with me."
"Will do." Dean rolled off the bed and stood, and Cas followed him out of the room.
The door to Bobby's study was closed, so it was assumed that he was in there. Sam and Amber were talking quietly on the couch, the TV on but forgotten.
Dean made up the formula for Kam as Castiel watched him to make sure he was doing it correctly.
"I think you need to add a bit more water, Dean."
Dean did so and Cas nodded, satisfied. Castiel handed Kam over when the formula was ready.
"Feed him; I'm going the get a cloth to clean up your face."
Sighing at Cas' persistence in fixing his nose, he did as he was told. Leaning against the counter, he fed Kam and the baby sucked contentedly. Cas came back in a few minutes with a wet washcloth and a bottle of alcohol.
He began dabbing at the dried blood on Dean's face, working it off gently until the washcloth was stained red. Rinsing off the cloth, he started again, this time on Dean's nose.
Dean winced before Cas even touched him. Cas rolled his eyes. "I didn't even do anything yet."
He made to bring the cloth to Dean's nose again, pressing gently. "Does it hurt?"
"Alot." Dean replied, giving a dramatic sigh, and Cas pulled his hand away.
"I'm sorry..I didn't-"
Dean brought his lips to Cas'. "I'm kidding. I'm just messing with you. Carry on."
Within a few more minutes Dean's face was clean and Cas had cleaned out the cut on the bridge of his nose with some alcohol.
"Doesn't that feel better?" Cas asked, brushing his fingers down Dean's now clean cheek.
"Yeah." Dean said grudgingly and put Kam's bottle on the counter. The baby had finished the whole thing and was now snuggling in Dean's arms.
Cas touched Dean's bruised neck lightly with regret. "I wish I could heal it for you, Dean."
"I'll be fine," Dean reassured him, kissing his forehead. "I've had worse."
Someone cleared their throat to announce their presence, and Dean and Cas looked around. Bobby was standing there, and he was shifting awkwardly. Cas stiffened immediately and Dean frowned at him.
"Listen..I wanted to say that I'm sorry, Cas. I'm not good at this kind of thing, so bear with me." The older hunter sighed. " I know what I say comes off the wrong way, but I don't mean it like that."
"It seemed like you meant it before." Cas retaliated. Dean touched his arm lightly.
"Let him finish, Cas."
"I just want you two to watch out for yourselves. No matter where you go you need to keep an eye out. But that doesn't mean that you can't relax and enjoy life. It just means that you can't just pull out of hunting. Once you're in, you're in." Bobby played with the hem of his cap, frustrated. "This isn't coming out how I wanted it to."
Cas was watching the hunter with his arms crossed. It sounded like Bobby had just said the exact same thing as before.
"Alright..how about...if you two ever need help, I'm always here. No matter what it is, just give me a call."
Dean smiled. Yeah, that was much better. Bobby walked forward and pulled Cas into a hug unexpectedly. "I'm sorry, kid."
Bobby clapped him on the back before releasing him. Cas regarded him with a surprised expression. "I know you've been through a lot and I'm not helping things along any."
Dean glanced at Cas to see what his reaction would be.
"It's fine. I won't hold it against you, Bobby. We're all family...sometimes people say things that they don't mean." Cas said, but he remained stony faced.
Bobby relaxed a bit and grinned. "I care about you boys, is all. I want to see that you stay safe."
"We are, and we will be." Dean assured him. He put an arm around Cas' waist. "As long as we stick together I think we'll all be ok."
Cas grudgingly gave Bobby a smile, and the hunter nodded. There would definitely be some rough spots in his and Dean's relationship, and some of it would be caused by family. But family forgives. Family helps. Cas trusted his new human family more then he ever did his angelic relatives. There was something about humans..they would fight and fight but when the time came that there was a serious problem they would stick together. That's what Cas loved about his family. The angels would probably backstab him..well they did try and backstab him, literally. He couldn't imagine Bobby doing that to him. What Bobby said was out of love and even though it hurt, Cas forgave him. Because love hurts, and love forgives.