TOO LIKE LIGHTNING

Shara is now free to pursue a new love but she worries that she and Jamos might be moving too quickly. Hence the title from one of my favorite lines of Romeo and Juliet, "It is too Rash, too unadvised, too sudden, Too like the lightning, which doth cease to be Ere one can say, It lightens." ~ DK

…

With no further need to chaperone, Lana had decided she wanted to have the Polaris drop she and Dalla off back at the Hold. And then Marlon had decided to stay with her. Perhaps seeing the Harkons' new addition had gotten them thinking about trying for a sibling for Dalla.

Shara smiled as she watched their things are being brought down the gangplank to the dock. She wondered if Jamos was getting similar ideas. He had looked very natural holding little Miranda and he had been as good with the twins as he was with Dalla.

But Adria had pulled Shara aside before they left Harkon Hall. "I wouldn't presume to order you about. You got enough of that from my sister," she had said. "But if I could offer a piece of advice? Enjoy your freedom. Don't be in too big of a hurry to replace one sort of bondage with another." She nodded at Jamos. "No matter how pretty the package that it comes in. If it's meant to happen it will. Don't press it. Enjoy the journey."

Enjoy the journey. That's what Shara planned to do. She noticed though, that as Jamos's things were being moved back to the Captain's cabin, her own had been left there as well.

"Ness." She pulled the crewman aside, hoping to keep things a bit quiet. "My things should be moved back to the smaller cabin."

He gave her a playfully confused frown. "We were under the impression that you were officially the Captain's Lady now." Of course someone overheard him say it and several of them took up the chorus.

She rolled her eyes and caught Jamos's grin across the deck where he was overseeing some other work.

"Well actually," she called over the voices brazenly. "I still prefer the title Beast master." She raised her eyebrows suggestively, only to be answered with catcalls and whistles.

Jamos marched across the deck towards her. "Now who's getting the tongues wagging." He took her in his arms and swung her around to a renewed cheers and singing.

She pushed him away before he could kiss her. "I'm still having my own cabin, thanks!"

"Of course, Madam Beast Master." He bowed to her.

"You did say when I first signed on, that it was one of the privileges of the rank." She reminded him.

"Aye. That I did." He smirked. "However, as captain, I do reserve the right to promote members of my crew…"

She took a step towards him. "And I thought you didn't consider me to be a member of the crew."

Jamos chuckled. "I consider you…" he pulled her close again. But he didn't get a chance to tell her. There was too much for the captain to do to prepare for the voyage. He groaned at the interruption. "Duty calls."

"We're not done with this!" She yelled after him.

He lifted his hat to her and she rolled her eyes.

"Ness." Shara caught the crewman again as he passed.

"Aye, Madam, master of the Beast?"

She lowered her voice. "I was told you would be the one to ask."

"Has my sweet Maris been giving away all of my secrets?" He crossed his arms over his chest, haughtily.

"I would never divulge what a lady has told me in confidence." She teased and then grew more serious. "No, it's about the captain. You were with him when he had a run in with a Hugo Brylik…"

"Bralykburn." He nodded. "Aye. The Captain's first voyage after he was given the Polaris." Ness patted the rail as if the ship was as dear to him as it was to Jamos. "Of course we couldn't call him Captain back then. Officially the captaincy can only be awarded after an officer turns 16. But we all knew it was his ship. Had special orders from Lord Alon to show him the ropes. Make sure he lived to see that Captain's title."

"Lana said Lord Alon's health was failing." Shara remembered.

"Aye. Bralykburn called the Blackwell brothers spoiled but they lost the thing they really wanted and needed, their father." Ness touched his thumb to his lips and muttered, "Light of the salt gods."

Shara repeated the motion and the phrase. She let the silence linger for a moment and then asked. "So it was after that first voyage when Jamos met Bralykburn in a pub?"

"Knew something had to be up with Hugo actin' so friendly. Offerin' to buy the kid drinks. He really was only a kid, but we were keepin' an eye on things. Some things you gotta figure out for yourself and the captain learned what that much drinkin' gets ye the next mornin'." Ness grinned. "But it's the game you're wantin' to hear about, aye?"

She nodded.

"So ol' Hugo offers to teach the boy how to play sabaac. Not like any of us couldn't have taught him how to play. It was more the novelty of the thing and the fact that the pirate was buyin' the drinks as well. It was pretty even, wins and losses, once he got the hang of things. But Hugo's watchin' all the time like a chirn for his opening to up the stakes. An' finally, he must have had a Dxun of a hand. He bet everything he had."

"Bralykburn bet everything?" She asked in disbelief.

"The whole Keep and everything in it. He's just darin' the captain to call the bet." And before I could stop him the kid says, 'The Hold's not mine but I've got a ship'."

"What did you do?" Shara was engrossed in the tale now.

"Took the cards out of the Captain's hand and told him he was done and it was time to go back to the ship. Left the chits on the table where they lay. Kid passed out before we got to the door of the pub, didn't remember a thing in the morning, had to tell him how he'd almost lost his ship."

Shara shook her head. "And Bralykburn didn't stop him going, since you left the other winnings on the table?"

"Not after he saw the kid's cards." Ness smirked. "The captain had an Idiot's array. If I had let it go on…"

"He would have taken Hugo for everything he had." She realized.

"Not that he wouldn't have deserved it for trying to swindle a kid but he had a wife and kid of his own to support. Sounds like his luck has turned since then. Bralykburns have had a few good seasons. But he's not likely to forget."

For a long time after they set off, Shara stood at the rail thinking over what she and heard. She was quiet during dinner and then excused herself to her cabin for an early night.

Jamos rose from the table in the state room as well and followed. "Is everything alright?" He asked her.

"It should be, shouldn't it." She smiled, wearily. "I'm just a little tired. It's been such an emotional whirlwind."

He nodded in understanding but couldn't help reaching out to touch her cheek. "Go get some rest. I can't have my beast master falling asleep on the job tomorrow."

He wanted to kiss her goodnight. She could see it in his eyes. He might have rather not said goodnight at all and led her right back to his cabin but he respected her too much to suggest it and she was thankful that she didn't have to decline either politely or otherwise.

Back in the small cabin that had been hers for her first voyage aboard the Polaris, Shara was finally able to relax. She fell asleep almost as soon as her head hit the pillow.

…

She was up early the next morning and had almost forgotten any of her previous misgivings. An unseasonably warm breeze was blowing and the sky glowed pink with the sunrise. Shara could hardly wait to get back in the water with the brylks.

It didn't surprise her a bit when the captain sidled up next to her. "Well, someone's up bright and early this morning."

She nodded. "It was too beautiful up here for me to stay in my cabin any longer."

"Aye." He agreed. "And you look refreshed. Did you sleep well?"

"I did, but I think part of it is just being on this deck with a purpose and a heading." She looked at him and smiled. "The Polaris feels like home."

Jamos took her hand in his and gave it a squeeze. "I'm glad to hear you say it. It always has for me too."

"You were twelve, weren't you? But you had served on other ships before that?"

"Aye, of course." He grinned. "From the time I could walk I had a deck under my feet. Must have served as cabin boy or midshipman on nearly every ship in the fleet. Father wanted Marlon to learn everything about running the Hold and being a Lord and he wanted me to learn everything about the sea." There was a gleam in his eyes as he gestured out over the waters.

Shara almost hated to bring it up, seeing the joy on his face, but she had to ask. "And then your father got sick?"

He looked at her and sighed. "He was always sick. I guess it got progressively worse. That's the nature of the disease. But they didn't want me to see it." A hard edge colored his voice. "And I think he knew, he'd never live to see me make captain. He wanted to see me enjoy my own ship before…" Jamos sniffed and his gaze went back to the sea. "I didn't get to say goodbye. I was leagues away on a voyage when I got the comm that he only had days left. I got back to the Hold in time to join in giving him back to the salt gods."

"That's why you were so determined for me to get to see my father." She rubbed his arm.

"I was so angry at them all for denying me that. But I don't know, maybe it was a good thing. My memories of him are when he was strong and laughing."

Shara thought of her own father in the med center bed hooked up to machines and then she chose another memory, when she was little, and he was lifting her onto the back of a dalgo and showing her how to hold the reigns.

"I was angry at them too because…" Jamos drew her attention again and looked her straight in the eyes. "When I finally learned about my father's disease they told me that I'm a … a carrier." He was watching her closely as if sure she would bolt now that she knew the truth, that the dreaded Fartrad's condition was harbored in his genes.

Instead she reassured him with two words and a smile. "I'm not."

"You're not…" he asked confused. "How could you possibly know…"

"I was tested almost the moment I walked into the Rash Estate."

"You were tested for Fartrad's Disease?" He asked again.

She nodded and then rushed through the explanation. "Lady Rash was furious when she found out how long we'd been trying for a child before she was able to do it but once the results were back she mellowed towards me considerably."

Jamos frowned. "So you think… your ex-husband was a carrier?"

She swatted him playfully. "Are you upset that you and he have something in common?"

He grinned and pulled her close to him, whispering. "I can think of a few things I'd rather we had in common."

Shara giggled. "Well I don't think he was the only one. Melaana told me that when her parents were negotiating with the Bonteris for her betrothal, Dane had to provide a whole medical evaluation. And she had tests done while she was pregnant to make sure the baby was healthy because Brem didn't have any medical records." The smile dropped from her face. The tests hadn't done them any good. Mel and the baby were still gone.

"What are the odds though?" Jamos mused. "I mean for both siblings to be carriers, one of their parents would have had to…"

"I accidentally walked in on Lady Rash having some sort of treatment once." Shara admitted. "She claimed it was only a massage but I'm sure it was an experimental method to hold off the progress of the disease. She made me swear never to tell anyone what I suspected, especially her children. I'm also sure her manic mood swings were partially to do with her pain meds."

"That doesn't excuse the way she treated you," he said firmly.

"No, I don't suppose it does."

A sound drew Shara's attention to the water, a Brylk cry. There was something about it that gave her pause.

"And yet she's nothing at all like her sister." Jamos didn't seem to have noticed the brylks. "You seemed to be getting along well with Adria."

"After my initial shock at their resemblance." She gave him half a smile while trying to focus on what the animals were attempting to tell her.

"Out of curiosity, what were you and Adria talking about before we left?" He asked her. "I was busy trying to convince Glover to find Elinor a better match than some Bralykburn so I didn't hear."

"Oh," she tried to remember the thread of that conversation and distractedly answered, "bondage."

Jamos's eyebrows hit the cloudless sky. "I...I didn't think the Harkons were into that sort of thing."

Shara laughed, realizing what she had said and compounded it. "Well, they weren't initially. But then Adria got a holobook, Twenty-Five Shades of Red, I think it was called."

"Is that the reason there's a new baby at the Hall?" He asked with a smirk.

Shara grinned, "I don't doubt it." And then she heard the call again. Something was definitely going on with the brylks.

Jamos still didn't seem to have noticed. He was preoccupied with holding her, his lips close to her ear. "Is this something I should study up on?"

"Hold on." She pushed out of his embrace and looked over the side of the rail at the water below. It was churning with the urgent swimming of the beasts. "Something's wrong."

It took him a moment to change gears and then he was at her side picking up on her worry. "What is it?"

"The brylks, can't you see?" She wasn't even sure of it herself. "I think they can sense something coming, some kind of danger."

He was looking to her, putting his trust in her. "Do you know? Can you tell what it is?"

She shook her head and looked around her. It was a beautiful day the sun rise and the warm breeze, not a cloud in the sky except that one, little one, far off on the horizon and then it came to her in a flash of intuition, maybe something she remembered from the beast master's guidebook holo she had been reading not long ago. "I think there's going to be a storm."

Another cry from the water below made her even more sure of the assumption. "I think we need to find a harbor."

Jamos held onto her upper arms and looked directly into her eyes. "Are you sure?"

"I…" she wasn't, not absolutely, but every beast rider instinct within her was telling her to trust the brylks. "I don't know the sea like you do, but I know what it feels like before the fambaas herd stampedes to find shelter from the weather. It's…" she looked down over the rail again. "They want us to get to safety."

"Then we will!" He gave her shoulders a squeeze and kissed her forehead. And then he was off doing what he did best. "What's the closest harbor to our present position?" His voice boomed out over the whole deck.

"Flint Locke!" Came the answer from the navigator at the helm.

"Flint Locke." Jamos repeated quietly trying to remember what he knew of the place. "It's a small town but the bay offers good shelter." Then he nodded as he made the decision and gave the order. "All hands on deck! We make for Flint Locke with all speed!"

The crew obeyed, whether they believed in the worries of an untested girl from the south or not. They knew she could bring in a catch but a few of them looked at her like they wondered if all this was necessary as they raced around the deck and up and down through the rigging. But before they reached the the harbor the wind had started to pick up and the rain had started to fall.

Jamos had told her to go below to her cabin so she could stay warm and dry, but she was a part of this crew, no matter what he considered her to be, and she wouldn't put her own comfort above doing her job. She stayed by the rail, watching the brylks for any sign that they should change their heading.

She could tell he was frustrated with her for putting her own life at risk even though she was staying out of the way of the other sailors. As the waves grew higher he sent Ness to tie line around her waist so she could be pulled back on board if she did chance to go over.

Finally, after what seemed like hours, the the mate in the nest called out that Flint Locke Bay was in sight. Jamos would brook no argument that Shara was to be among the first to go ashore. He, on the other hand, stayed with the ship until the last sail was stowed and the last hatch was battened.

She paced the common room of the small inn, while Ness tried to reassure her that everything would be fine now. She had done her job better than anyone had thought possible and now she had to let the captain do his.

No one else seemed worried. They were drinking to her health and settling down to wait out the storm. Shara knew she wouldn't be able to relax until the captain was safe here with the rest of them.

And then, he blew in the door with a great gust of wind and a laugh. She rushed to him and hugged him tightly despite his soaked clothing. There was a loud round of cheers and quite a few voices took up a chorus of 'the Captain's Lady'. But that was quickly overhauled by a new set of lyrics, something about the Beast master and her beast.

"They're very creative, aren't they?" She had to speak loudly for him to hear her over the noise.

He only gazed at her.

The two of them were shunted up the stairs towards the one guest bedroom that the inn had available. The door was shut behind them and then they were alone.

In the relative quiet she could hear the rain lashing against the storm shutters that covered the window. She crossed the room to it now, even though she couldn't see out, arms wrapped around herself as if she was cold. And maybe she was. She did seem to be trembling. But that may have been because she'd been so worried about him. Or because they were alone together now after all the excitement and adrenaline rush and everyone most likely expected that they would…

She glanced at the room's one bed and then was startled by his voice.

"I think you saved the ship." Jamos had collapsed onto a chair and was pulling off his sea boots.

"I was just…" she began and then focused her gaze once again on the closed window.

"And all our lives."

She heard him stand and pad towards her in stocking feet across the creaky wooden floor. She gave a small gasp when he stepped up behind her and his arms went around her.

"Shara, I love you." He chuckled. "And not just because of this. You're free now. Please, say you'll marry me." With one hand he pushed her still damp hair to one side and kissed her neck just below her ear.

"Jamos, I…" How easy it would be just to melt into his embrace, but Adria's words came back to her. Don't be in too big of a hurry to replace one sort of bondage with another. Is that what she was doing?

She began again more firmly, "Jamos, I can't."

His lips left her throat but his arms stayed tight around her.

"I'm not ready." She turned towards him, still in his embrace, and placed a hand on his bearded cheek. "It's not that I want anyone else. When the time comes, I know you are the person I want to spend the rest of my life with."

He smiled and almost spoke but she put her fingers over his lips to stop him and let her finish.

"I was only 16 when I met him. I hardly knew who I was. And then he was such a big part of my identity for so long. And now…" she swallowed, knowing she was doing the right thing. "I need to find out who I am, on my own, without him."

He took her hand in his and kissed it. "I'd like to know who you are without him too." He grinned his little boy grin. "And as much as I'd like to have you as my own right now, I will wait until you're ready. If…" he looked questioningly at her.

"If?"

"If you'll allow me to find out along with you?"

She smiled and nodded.

"Of course no matter what happens, if we stay together in this room tonight, the whole crew is going to think…"

"Let them think what they want." She sighed. "This is between you and me."

"Alright." He let go of her and took a step back, surveying their surroundings. He took one of the pillows from the bed and dropped it onto the floor. Then without further ado he laid down and tried to make himself comfortable.

"What are you doing?" She asked with a laugh.

"I'm going to sleep here." He grinned up at her. "I promised to wait till you're ready but if I have to lie with you on that bed I really don't know how long I'd be able to keep that promise."

Shara laid down on the bed on her stomach, looking over the edge of the mattress at his smiling face. Then she reached down with one hand and laced her fingers with his. "Thank you, Jamos."

…

And thank you for reading and reviewing! To accompany this chapter there will be a new topic added to the forum concerning the health and wellness of the people of Onderon. Come and join in the conversation!

myforums/DuchessKenobi/272031/