A/N
Brightmind: Yeah, her little sleep talk was adorable wasn't it! Fawnkit's just a stickler for rules, while Hawkpool seems to find the loophole everything, something her kits will inherit too ;) I didn't want to kill off my shy little ShadowClan deputy, but it was crucial to the plot. You'll see ;p
Hawkpool heart battered in her chest, sudden anxiety filling her. What if they rejected her? She'd been gone for almost three moons! How much had she missed? How was Splashspirit?
"Slowpoke! Aren't you comin'?" Acorn called over his shoulder to Hawkpool, snapping her from her panicky thoughts.
"Um, yes." Hawkpool gulped, sliding down the hill. "I'm kinda scared now, to be honest."
Acorn scoffed. "You said your father's leader. What's there to be frightened off?"
Though he had a good point, she wasn't just scared for herself. "I'm worried about my kits, and you, too. My kits are half clan, which isn't very approved off, and you're practically rogues. I'm worried about you all being mocked." Hawkpool lowered her ears, her gaze dropping to her paws. They ached dully and her eyelids were fluttering.
"You're just tired." Acorn noticed Hawkpool's energy wearing down. She wasn't used to much exercise since she had her kits. "Just speak with your father and I'm sure he'll arrange something."
Hawkpool yawned, her eyes watering. "Sure. You're probably right." She swayed on her paws, Acorn pressing against her, helping her keep her balance.
"I smell intruders!" A voice shouted from behind the rows of reed and cattail stalks. Hawkpool recognized the squeaky voice instantly.
"Ivykit! Er, Ivypaw!" Hawkpool called out. The young she cat would be an apprentice by now.
The stalks shivered and Ivypaw bounced through. She twitched her ear. "Hawkpool?" Her voice was soft, like she was unsure. She wouldn't have a very good memory of her much.
"What'd you say, Ivypaw? Intruders?" Juniperfur followed Ivypaw, her dark blue eyes slowly growing round with surprise as she laid eyes on Hawkpool.
"Hawkpool!" Juniperfur's voice grew high with joy, embracing her step-sister. "Oh, it is really you?"
Hawkpool nodded, trying to not smile as wide as she wanted to. "It's me." A yawn interrupted her as she motioned to her group. "We need to speak with Oakstar."
Juniperfur nodded at the mention of her adoptive father. "He's probably still with Sandfern in the nursery."
Hawkpool tipped her head. "Nursery? Why would my mother be in the nursery, other than…" Her mind seemed to stop. It couldn't be possible, could it?
Juniperfur snickered. "Yeah, the whole clan was super shocked. Sandfern moved in a little after you left with her second litter. You'll some new siblings in a few days. C'mon, Ivypaw and I will guide you back ourselves. Maybe I can get another warrior to help your friends get accustomed to RiverClan." Juniperfur offered open-mindedly. "If they're up to it." The grey tabby challenged with a daring smirk.
Hawkpool let out a quiet sigh of relief. She was glad that Juniperfur was the one she ran into first. Her adopted sister was so open to everything, as long as everyone gave their best. Your best is always enough. Juniperfur had said once. You just need other cats to help you get there sometimes.
The sleepy figures trudging around camp seemed to snap awake when Juniperfur and Ivypaw led Hawkpool and the others in, shock in their eyes, some even looking mildly angry, while others looked happy.
"My baby!" Came a honey-sweet voice, Hawkpool taken by surprise as Sandfern threw herself around Hawkpool, the black she cat unused to her mother's frame so plump. Oakstar joined in on their embrace, and though he looked stoic, his amber-red eyes gleamed with joy.
"I'm glad you're here safely and all, but who are all these other cats?" Oakstar questioned, looking suspiciously at Acorn the most.
"Oh, yeah! Lemme introduce everyone." Hawkpool cleared her throat. "This is Acorn, and his sister, Merry." The two littermates dipped their heads, Acorn giving a quirky smile. Oakstar frowned at him, raising his eyebrow.
"This is Hickory, Merry's mate, and their two kits, plus Breeze." Hawkpool meowed, Breeze shyly hiding under Hawkpool's forelegs. Sandfern cooed at the kits.
"And those four... Are they…?" Oakstar pointed his nose to Hazelkit, Whitekit, Birchkit and Reedkit.
"Yes. Those are my kits. And… And they're Thornsnag's, too." Hawkpool lied. The truth was, only Hazelkit, Birchkit and Reedkit had Thornsnag has their father, while Whitekit and Nightkit were fathered by Jaytalon, but she couldn't possibly say that.
"How do we know you're loyal to us? How do we know these rogue scum will be loyal if we take them in?" Mothleg accused, glaring at Hawkpool. "And her kits, they could be just like their father! Lazy and a tick in your tail!"
"Don't speak ill of Thornsnag like that." Oakstar commanded, a strongness in his voice, like he was defending his own kin. "Don't forget they carry my blood, too, Mothleg."
"No, he's right!" Badgerfoot hollered, his pale amber eyes round with sheepishness. "They don't have clanblood."
"Yes we do!" Acorn hissed loudly, his lips twitching. "Me and my sister have clanblood. We're half ShadowClan. Which means her kits are clanblooded, too. And they shouldn't live without Hickory, their father. Who, may I say, left being a big rouge boss to be a father."
Acorn turned to Mothleg and Badgerfoot, his chin high and eyes glinting, almost daring them with a smirk. "If you dare challenge me, go for it. I know more brutal moves and have witnessed much bloodshed that StarClan will have your mangy pelts up in the sky in no time."
"He speaks of StarClan!" Cats whispered in hushed tones, gossip spreading quickly. "Perhaps he'll be a good addition to our ranks… A rogue's never known of Starclan before. Maybe he's telling the truth!"
Badgerfoot grew silent, shrinking back down beside Spidertail, who huffed at him in disappointment of challenging Oakstar. Mothleg stalked away, curling up in the middle of the warrior den, the stale scent of his daughter lingering in the lining.
"Welcome back." Oakstar greeted his daughter, beaming warmly. "However, your friends here must go through a-"
"Name changing ceremony. We know." Hickory replied, glancing at his mate. "We've already agreed to it."
"Very well. From this moment forward, you shall be known as Hickorynose. StarClan honors your honesty and resilience, and we welcome you as a full warrior of RiverClan." Oakstar rested his head on Hickorynose's forehead, the grey-brown flecked tom licking Oakstar's chest in respect. Acorn followed him, becoming Acornheart and his sister, Merry, was named Plumflower, for her purple-violet eyes.
Oakstar merely added -kit to Bat's name, changing Shadow to Shadekit, as most cats don't have prefixes with a clan name other than the very first leaders.
"Now, Acornheart." Oakstar said, his voice softer than his cold eyes glaring subtly at him. "You said you were half ShadowClan?"
The light chocolate tom nodded. "I can't say by who, but know that even though I am half rogue, my ShadowClan parent is loyal and I promise to make this clan my new family. Same goes for my real family." Acornheart flicked his tail towards Plumflower, Hickorynose, and their kits.
"With your clanblood, I assume you understand the code?" Oakstar's amber-red eyes blazed into Acornheart's calm, green orbs. He dipped his head with a confident grin.
"We do." He smirked at Hawkpool, winking. Oakstar's eyes narrowed dangerously.
"Look here, son." Oakstar growled under his breath, gritting his teeth. "Don't flirt with my daughter. Her mate died only four moons ago. She needs time to mourn."
Hawkpool flattened her ears in embarrassment. She forgot to mention Thornsnag to Acornheart, and he was under the influence that Jaytalon was her kits' only father.
Acornheart raised an eyebrow at her over his shoulder as he followed Oakstar with Hickorynose into the leader's den.
"Mama, there's so many cats." Reedkit hid under Hawkpool, Birchkit silently half hiding behind one of her slim forelegs. Hawkpool chuckled softly and scooped them up.
"Come on. It'll be okay. You'll make great friends. Look, there's so many other kits!" Hawkpool exclaimed, surprised herself. Three kits pranced around camp, no older than two moons, with pale grey and blueish coats, Mistsong watching them carefully.
"Mistsong!" Hawkpool called out. The blue grey tabby lifted her head, her pale green eyes lighting up.
"Hawkpool! Oh my! The gossip was real. Not to mention spreads like wildfire." The new queen chuckled, quickly glancing at her kits. "The grey tom kit is Ashkit, after my father. The pale silver tabby she kit is Blizzardkit. And the silver tom with the white spots is Icekit."
Hawkpool purred sleepily at Mistsong's kits, who were only a quarter-moon or so younger than her own. "Where's Pebbletail?" Hawkpool asked, recalling how he was oddly correct about the genders of her kits.
"Hm? Oh, he's probably out helping Gorseheart with training Treepaw. He's getting ready for his assessment in a moon or two." Mistsong explained, her pale green eyes gazing on fondly to her trio of kits.
Hawkpool felt a strange sinking of disappointment. "Oh. I've just missed everyone." She stopped with a loud yawn. Mistsong laughed softly.
"I think you miss sleep a bit more. Go on and nap. I'll keep an eye on the kits. Willowleap will be up with her kits soon, too." Mistsong insisted as Hawkpool's eyes drooped.
As she nosed her way through the den, she made out the silvery shape of Willowleap curled up in her nest in a light slumber, a trio of young kits, no older than a moon, nestled in her milk-scented belly fur.
Her heart skipped a beat when she spotted her old nest in the back of the dimmest corner of the den, Pebbletail's faint scent on it, showing he'd moved it in. Hawkpool felt a fresh wave depression slosh over her when she inhaled the stale, bittersweet scent of Thornsnag.
Being a rogue had been adrenaline nonstop, leaving her no time to mourn or dwell on the thought of his death. She'd forgotten he was the reason she left RiverClan in the first place.
The waves of memories of their laughs and how they'd planned a future together in hushed whispers the night before the battle versus the NightWalkers, how they'd spoke of being better parents than they had, like how his parents died before he was an apprentice and how hers weren't even in her life until she was seven moons old.
Hawkpool felt like her heart was burning and melting inside her chest, like her mind was going to bleed out her ears and her eyes were never going to stop crying until they fell out of their sockets. I don't think coming back was a good idea… I'll never be over you…
(POV change: Jaytalon. I'm gonna do their experience when he entered the camp)
"Jaytalon, is that you?" The white tom heard the voice of Cloudstar, purring hoarsely.
"Yes. It's me. But not just me." Jaytalon stepped back, revealing Nightkit, who was standing under the belly of Kylee. Dime and Sugar each held one of their kits in their jaws, though their kits were nearly five moons.
"Who are these cats? And why now, are you back? We thought you left to be with Hawkpool after the battle." Cloudstar raised an eyebrow in suspicion
Jaytalon waved his tail to Kylee. "My sister, formerly known as Aspenkit." He brought Nightkit closer to him. "This is Nightkit, my daughter."
Cloudstar curious expression remained as Jaytalon explained Dime, Sugar and their kits. "Hmmm… Very well. Follow me back. Your brother and sister better know how to hunt if you're to join us. And better become loyal to us and only us. They cannot have a paw in each life. Same goes for Sugar and her kits."
Cloudstar parted the barrier easily, the bracken and brambles barely snagging on his perfect white fur. Sugar winced loudly as a bramble caught on her ear.
"Cats of ThunderClan!" Cloudstar yowled, cats gathering at the base of the Tallrock. "We have a cat rejoining us today. Jaytalon."
Shocked eyes and surprised murmurs washed over the measly clan, and with the new rogues joining ShadowClan, ThunderClan was tiny.
"He also found Aspenkit for us, his sister that was stolen by rogues. He has a younger half brother, with his mate and kits. Please accept them under these new names; Kylee, from this day forward, you will be known as Aspenheart. StarClan honors your kindness and intelligence, and we welcome you has a full warrior of ThunderClan."
Cloudstar continued the ceremony, naming Sugar, Sugarbreeze and giving Dime the name Duskpelt, and added -kit to Lightning and Pepper's- their kits- names.
"However, the ceremony isn't over." Cloudstar announced, his eyes resting on Lightfeather's kits. She was frantically and quickly grooming their pelts. "Dovekit, Rabbitkit, and Squirrelkit. You all reached your sixth moon, and it is time for you to be apprenticed. Until you receive your warrior names, you shall be known as Dovepaw, Rabbitpaw and Squirrelpaw."
Cloudstar turned his head towards the other side of the clearing. "Leaftail, Flamefoot and Snowwing, you are all ready to take on apprentices, and you all have all shown loyalty and wisdom. You all be the mentors of Dovepaw, Rabbitpaw and Squirrelpaw. I expect you all to pass on your knowledge to your apprentice."
Leaftail gently coaxed Dovepaw on, their noses barely bumping as she pulled away. Rabbitpaw showed no sign of timidness as he touched noses with his half-uncle, his bright green eyes glinting with determination. Squirrelpaw looked awkward, being too short to reach Snowwing's soft pink nose. She leaned down with an amused grin.
Rainstorm bid his kits farewell as they trotted after their mentors into the forest, Rabbitpaw's enthusiasm even getting Dovepaw to skip a bit. Rainstorm padded up to Jaytalon after his kits disappeared from view.
"Is… is Nightkit…? Is she Hawkpool's kit, too?" Rainstorm swallowed nervously as he didn't know what else to say. Jaytalon nodded.
"Hawkpool took the other four with her to RiverClan. Nightkit wanted to be here." Jaytalon leaned in close to Rainstorm's ear. "I'd prefer, when she's of age, if she was mentored by you. She's blind in her right eye, and Hawkpool and I thought you'd be the best mentor. To teach her the advantages of it."
Rainstorm looked offended briefly with them flaunting his weakness, but he dipped his head slightly. "If that's what you and my sister wish, I shall ask Cloudstar when she's six moons old to mentor her." He glanced at the small bundle, asleep beside Cardinalheart, who agreed to nurse her. "She looks quite sweet."
"She misses her littermates, and her mother." Jaytalon sighed, closing his eyes. "Our love together, Hawkpool and I, didn't work out quite as we planned. She never had the chance to mourn Thornsnag, and I guess she couldn't take much of it."
Rainstorm felt the pain of his missing sister slap his freshly. He merely dipped his head in response and stalked away. "There's deputy duties I must attend to. Apologies, Jaytalon."
Jaytalon sighed and lowered his ears as his heart sank. Cats were expected to be distant with their sudden arrival. He glanced around camp, frowning at their small numbers. "Hey, Mousepaw!" Jaytalon called to the brown tabby she cat. She was instantly clinging to him like a bramble in his fur.
"Yes?" Mousepaw batted her eyes, her sun-yellow depths sparkling intensely. Jaytalon inched away a bit.
"Uh, where's Mintflower?" He asked, feeling uncomfortable. He was so much older than her! After all, he was a warrior when she was a kit, but she didn't seem to care. That's what bothered him the most.
Mousepaw frowned and rolled her eyes. "Oh, her. She went and got killed by a dog a couple days ago. Rumor is Moonwing's gonna replace her."
Jaytalon recoiled in shock. "Mintflower died? What?" He spotted Brackenfang across the clearing, his head hung over a mint leaf bushel, a small bump in the ground in front of his paws; his sister's grave.
"I gotta see Cloudstar. Sorry, Mousepaw." Jaytalon said hastily as Mousepaw's tail began creeping up his spine. He jumped up, chills going down his back as he headed towards the leader's den.
"Cloudstar?" Jaytalon cleared his throat. "May I come in?"
"Oh, yes! Sure thing, Jaytalon." Cloudstar replied, tossing Jaytalon a mouse. "Please, eat."
"O-oh, okay." Jaytalon was surprised by Cloudstar's generosity. He expected suspicion and judgement for running away to be with another clancat.
"So, why did you come back?" Cloudstar asked, though there was no hint of discernment. Jaytalon stared at his paws.
"I…" Jaytalon paused. He wasn't quite sure. He honestly could have lived with Hawkpool as a rogue with their kits. It was her who missed home.
"I, uh, I'm not so sure why I came back. Hawkpool missed her home. She missed what I missed; the familiar scents of our clanmates, sharing tongues, going to Gatherings, fighting side by side. We missed being clancats." Jaytalon answered, a slight falter in his voice at the mention of his mate. Former mate, I guess now.
"I see." Cloudstar focused on chewing on a tough pigeon. "Well, if you and your newfound family prove to be loyal, you are all welcome to stay. I see Aspenheart is expecting; her kits should be a healthy addition to ThunderClan. Many good lives were lost during the battle with the NightWalkers."
Jaytalon nodded solemnly, recalling the death of his former apprentice, Eaglepaw. Jaytalon had blacked out, and was too late to save the meek apprentice.
"I… I'm sorry about your step-son. It was my fault, I-" Jaytalon stopped as Cloudstar lifted a paw, his silver eyes closed.
"I'm sure Eaglepaw is content in StarClan with his family. Plus, he has Mintflower now. If StarClan allows me," Cloudstar opened his eyes, a kindness shimmering in their silver depths, "I'll tell you how is if I see him."
(POV Change; Hawkpool)
Hawkpool found herself unable to breathe clearly through her nose when she woke from her nap, not recalling actually falling asleep. For a few seconds she forgot why she was so stuffed up, but her heart felt like it was being crushed as she remembered when Thornsnag's scent wafted to her.
Slitting her heather red eyes to see better in the dimness of the heavily, milk-scented nursery, Hawkpool spotted Willowleap's empty nest, but Sandfern's nest was taken by herself and Oakstar, who was silently standing up to not disturb her.
"Father?" Hawkpool mumbled quietly, blinking the dried sleep and tears from her face. "Where are you going?"
Oakstar looked back in surprise. "Oh! Hawkpool, I didn't see you there. Something the matter?"
"Was goin on?" She slurred, yawning heavily. Oakstar purred in amusement.
"Sandfern's been very exhausted lately." Oakstar flicked his ears towards Sandfern. "Fell right asleep just a couple minutes ago. Oh, care to come see an apprenticeship?"
Hawkpool sniffed, yawning again as she stood and stretched. "Sure, whose?"
Oakstar purred once more. "You'll see."
…
"Silverkit, Tigerkit, you have reached the age of six moons, and the time has come for you to be apprenticed. From this day on, until you receive your warrior names, you will be known as Silverpaw and Tigerpaw. Your mentors will be Runningclaw and Greywillow. I hope they will pass on all they know to you." Oakstar announced, the two littermates' furs bushed up in excitement.
Runningclaw looked grateful, but shocked all the same. "Th-thank you!" He exclaimed softly.
Oakstar turned his gaze on Runningclaw and Greywillow. "Runningclaw, Greywillow, you are both ready to take on an apprentice. Runningclaw, you've received excellent training from Briarfrost and have shown quick wits and nimbleness. Greywillow, with your vast wisdom, you have shown patience and discipline and I expect both of you to pass all you know to your new apprentices."
Greywillow padded up to Tigerpaw, bumping her dark nose to his pale pink one, the dark brown tom recoiling in shock of the cold touch. She purred hoarsely in amusement. Runningclaw looked uneasy with Silverpaw's arrogant enthusiasm, hesitantly leaning forward. She groaned and butted his nose roughly.
"Yow!" Runningclaw claimed, holding a paw up to his nose. Silverpaw rolled her eyes dramatically. Tigerpaw darted over to his parents, his lime green eyes round with excitement.
"Did you see mama, did you?" Tigerpaw grinned enthusiastically. Wrenshadow and Rowanstorm both nodded in amusement.
"We did, dear. Don't you want Greywillow to show you around? Maybe meet the other apprentices?" Wrenshadow flicked her tail towards Greywillow, the senior silvery she cat chatting politely with Runningclaw and giving him tips.
Tigerpaw looked away awkwardly. "I'm too outta place to get along with the apprentices. Silverpaw says so."
"No, Silverpaw's wrong. Treepaw may be much older, and Antpaw may be bitter, but Ivypaw is a darling! And she seems to have a thing for Runningclaw, so I'm sure you and Silverpaw will be seeing a lot of her." Rowanstorm chuckled, oblivious to Snowfall growling hatefully under his breath, jealously for Runningclaw pouring from his icy glare.
Tigerpaw smiled shyly. "O-okay. I'll try." He padded over towards Greywillow, Runningclaw and Silverpaw, who Ivypaw had joined them as well, just as Rowanstorm had predicted.
Snowfall stalked away bitterly, his eyes slitted to the bright sun. His pale fur shimmering handsomely in the light, only flawed by the hateful expression on his face. Willowleap padded slowly up to her son, his eyes only darkening further.
"You're a liar. I don't want to speak with you." Snowfall hissed. Willowleap frowned sadly, flattening her ears and trotting away to her three kits, who danced around her and Gorseheart's paws.
"Don't worry, Willowleap. Someone one day will thaw his cold heart. Maybe he just needs the kind guidance of a she cat." Gorseheart coaxed his mate, resting his chin atop her head. She sighed heavily.
"He used to be so happy and playful. But Runningclaw grew closer to Ivypaw and Snowfall felt outcasted, especially when he found he was of ShadowClan blood." Willowleap hung her head, her eyes dully staring at her paws.
Hazelkit stared at Snowfall from the safety of the nursery, tipping her head in intriguement. "Curious." She whispered to herself, jumping in the air with a squeal when a tail tapped her back.
"Dewkit, don't scare me like that!" Hazelkit snapped, glaring playfully at Puddlewhisker's daughter, whom was only about a quarter-moon younger than Hawkpool's kits.
Dewkit, a pale silver tabby she kit with black ears, snickered devilishly. "But you're so easy to scare!"
"Go play with your brothers or something. Or mine. Let them do something other than choke on fresh-kill." Hazelkit stuck out her tongue. Dewkit giggled.
"You crack me up, Hazelkit! Reedkit's too smart to choke, we know that. And too stubborn to even eat fresh-kill yet." Dewkit snorted, a silly grin on her face. Dewkit always seemed too happy to be true to Hazelkit.
Hazelkit faked a gag, squinting her eyes. Dewkit tilted her head and giggled girlishly, skipping away towards her mother. Hazelkit felt chills reach down to her spine. Dewkit seemed a bit creepy with her over cheery smiles and laughs.
Hawkpool purred as she saw Dewkit scampering up to her mother, Puddlewhisker. "Is this one of your kits, Puddlewhisker?" Hawkpool asked, smiling warmly.
The grey and white tabby nodded. "This is Dewkit. Then there's her brothers, Webkit and Fernkit, and her sister Palekit."
"Fernkit's bossing Ashkit and Icekit around again." Dewkit mewed squeakily, flicking her short tail towards the apprentice where the three toms were rolling around in a tussle of tiny teeth and sheathed paws.
"What about your sisters?" Puddlewhisker scanned the clearing, her eyes tinged with worry. Dewkit chuckled.
"They're with Blizzardkit and Morningpaw. She wanted to explore the medicine den." Dewkit twitched her ears in response to Birchkit stalking up towards Hawkpool.
"I'm hungry, ma." Birchkit pawed at Hawkpool's side, but she stubbornly pushed him off.
"You all have to start eating fresh-kill now. Your teeth are getting too sharp for me." Hawkpool insisted, stretching as she stood up. "Here, I'll help you find a good piece. The freshest are always on the top. The bottom are mostly stale." She explained as they stood over the pile.
Birchkit sniffed the prey hesitantly. He scrunched his nose as he touched a visibly rotting trout. "Ew." He gagged, coughing.
"Yuck, you're right. I'll leave for the crows in a bit. Why not try a water vole?" Hawkpool picked the vole from under a carp, laying in front of Birchkit, Whitekit joining in.
"Water vole?" Whitekit grunted, poking it with his paw. "Chubs are the best I've tasted!" The tom exclaimed, sniffling around until he found one close to the top, plopping before Birchkit's paws.
Hawkpool snatched the vole up. "Guess I'll eat this. You two should share it." She sniggered as Whitekit dove in hungrily, Birchkit gingerly copying him, but after realizing how he loved the taste, hurriedly chowed the chub down like Whitekit.
Hawkpool buried the crowfood trout behind a thistle bush, hoping some crows would find before it started smelling worse. "I think you should lay it on a stone. Crows would find it easier." A tom's voice spoke behind her, startling her.
"Oh, Pebbletail!" Hawkpool sighed in relief. "You scared me."
The tabby chuckled sheepishly. "Sorry. The clan was saying you were back, so I came to see for myself." Pebbletail stared at his paws awkwardly. "I-I, um, missed you."
Hawkpool smiled sympathetically. "I missed you, too, Pebbletail." She nodded to her vole. "Care to eat with me?"
Pebbletail's amber eyes lit up. " I'd love to." He settled next to her, pushing the vole towards the queen. "She cats first." He purred politely.
"Why, thank you." She meowed with hint of sass. Pebbletail felt his face flush. Hawkpool teared at vole's fur, chewing the tender meat and savoring it in her mouth. She was used to rats and stringy mice whilst in the Twoleg place.
"I… I'm sorry about Thornsnag." Pebbletail blurted. Hawkpool flinched inwardly, her heart aching.
"Pl-please, don't." Hawkpool whispered, on the verge of crying.
"No." Pebbletail locked his eyes on her heather red eyes. "You can't avoid it. What you're doing isn't mourning. It's moping."
Hawkpool was silent, biting her lip to keep her mind off it. She tasted blood on her mouth. The worst moments of the battle replayed in her head, over and over. Ropeburn torturing her. Thornsnag playing hero. Ropeburn killing him. And in his last moments, Hawkpool felt more and more responsible as the memory was stuck on repeat.
"It…" Hawkpool choked on her words. "It's my fault. Thornsnag died because of me." Her legs shook, her whole body feeling like the weight of the entire clans was pressing down on her.
Pebbletail rested his tail on her back, the fur along her spine risen. "It's not. You were with kits. It's not your fault. Hawkpool, listen to me." He lifted her chin so they were eye to eye. "It. Is. Not. Your. Fault. It's not your fault Thornsnag died. Blaming yourself isn't going to bring him back. I know you don't like me in slightest, but as a friend, I'm here for you. I'll never leave your side."
Hawkpool sniffled, turning her head to the sky. "I can't cry. It's weak."
Pebbletail swatted her head playfully. "It's not. I cry sometimes, too. My brother died when were apprentices in the first moon. My half-brother was stillborn. My father was a crazy murderer. He killed my mother. He probably would have killed my sister next. But I know that they're happy in StarClan. My brother, my half-brother, my mother. I know I'll see them one day."
Hawkpool choked on the tears, trying to contain it, but they flowed with no stop. She wailed, now openly weeping. As Hawkpool looked at Pebbletail, she didn't see a pelt as grey as the cloudy sky above her; she saw a different tom. A tom with a pelt as brown as the freshly dug up earth. A tom whose pelt was littered with almost golden tabby stripes, and whose fluffy white chest resembled freshly fallen snow.
She felt tears prick at her eyes as she remembered the tom she had loved. She was lost in the many memories she had of Thornsnag, the way his once vibrant blue green eyes had gone dull... The way he used to laugh...
She broke down sobbing, much to the surprise of Pebbletail, who quickly went to comfort the black she-cat.
Pebbletail's ears twitched. "Hawkpool, I know that it must be hard, being surrounded by so many memories of him."Hawkpool opened her mouth to reply, only to be cut off by the tom's grey striped tail gently flicking over her nose. "But, you need to let go. You need to be strong. For your kits."
"M-my kits. Thornsnag and I wanted them to have good parents. But he's dead, Jaytalon's in ThunderClan and I'm here sobbing till my eyes fall out." Hawkpool whimpered, curling into his soft fur.
"It's okay, Hawkpool." He looked away timidly, but looked back at confidently. "If you need me, I can be their father." Pebbletail stopped, realizing he basically offered himself as her mate. F-f-f-figure, I mean. A father figure." He added quickly.
Hawkpool snuffled, her nose unable to breathe through now. "O-okay." SHe chuckled dryly. "I just feel so useless as a queen, like Mothleg said. I could barely defend myself. Then, I went and shamelessly killed my sister."
"I guess we got murdering in both our bloodlines, then, eh?" Pebbletail nudged her good-heartedly. She sniffled and giggled with a soft snort. "See? There's the Hawkpool I love so much!" He exclaimed, grinning wide.
"Love?" Hawkpool questioned, stopping in her tracks.
Pebbletail stared at her. "Um, let's not think about that. You have enough going on right now." He pressed against her as they trotted back to camp together, sides brushing. "Just forget, and let me help."
Hawkpool vacantly gazed at her paws again. She turned her heather red eyes up at Pebbletail. "Sure. But first, I need to speak with my father."
…
"What is it, Hawkpool?" Oakstar motioned for her to sit, the empty cattail and reed nest faintly scented of Sandfern. Hawkpool circled twice, sitting down and grooming a paw.
"Why were you defending Thornsnag so stubbornly? Acornheart wasn't flirting, anyways. That's just his personality." Hawkpool reasoned, staring hard at Oakstar.
"He's… He was my son-in-law. Your mate. Of course I'd defend him." Oakstar protested. He raised an eyebrow at his daughter. "What are getting at?"
"No, no, it was like you were defending your own kin? Ew, wait, is he like my brother?!" Hawkpool felt sick. Oakstar shook his head quickly.
"No, no, no, no. If he was I would have never let you two be together. Plus, he was in ThunderClan before he was here." Oakstar pointed out.
"Yeah, speaking of that, why did you let him in? And how was he such a natural at fishing and swimming?" Hawkpool argued, her tail lashing. "You're hiding something from me!"
Oakstar bushed his tail, flattening his ears. "Stop your digging, Hawkpool. This isn't something you need to know."
"So there is something you're keeping from me! I loved him! I deserve to know." Hawkpool snapped, raising herself to be larger than her father.
Oakstar sighed, settling back into his nest. "Calm down, please. I'll explain. Everything."
Hawkpool widened her eyes in mild surprise, but she lied down hesitantly. "I'm listening now."
Oakstar exhaled heavily. "Thornsnag's not ThunderClan. Well, he is. But he's not. His mother was ThunderClan, yes. But his father, was a RiverClan tom. My best friend. When he came here, I almost thought it was Berrystorm come back from the dead. See, Thornsnag's real father, Berrystorm, died before he was born. Thornsnag explained to me that he loved you, and wished to join us. To join the other half of his family At first I didn't believe him, but he looks practically just like his father. I couldn't reject my best friend's son a home."
Hawkpool's jaw dropped in shock. "So, he was so adapted to swimming and fishing, because, he's half RiverClan? Is that why he wanted such RiverClan-like names for out kits?"
Oakstar dipped his head. "He wanted to feel closer to his father. I guess RiverClan was more to him than ever." Oakstar sighed. "Thornsnag was half-clan."
A/N
Yeesh, wow, bad ending sorry. I've been having some writer's' block (yes I get it a lot) so I'd really appreciate some help in what you think should happen or just some ideas of anything going on in the story.