Ch. 20: A Tragic Ending (Cal's POV)

November 1929

Cal sat alone in the dark in his office… his depression overwhelming him. His thoughts came to his family; how would they survive the loss of the family fortune? Cal sadly looked around and felt like such a failure; after so many years of happiness, the charmed life that he and his family had been used to was coming to an end.

Cal felt that his good luck had finally run out; maybe everything that happened recently was a form of karma catching up with him. It was a cruel twist of fate, but a cruel twist that Cal felt he deserved for his past sins.

Up until recently, Cal felt that his life had gotten on track. After the birth of Jack in 1916, Abby and Cal welcomed a daughter in October 1918; a beautiful little girl who they named Catherine Rose. With addition of Catherine Rose, Cal and Abby felt that their family was now complete.

1918 wasn't without some sorrow. That November Ruth Dewitt-Bukator died of influenza… out of respect for Rose, Cal buried the poor woman. It was a sad moment for Cal, realizing that Rose and her entire family was gone. He hoped that in death that Ruth would be finally reunited with her husband and daughter.

A year later, Nathan Hockley died of a heart attack and Cal inherited the rest of his family fortune. Cal was sad that his father was gone, but he was more worried about his mother. Elizabeth Hockley was devastated by her husband's death, so Cal and Abby ended up inviting his mother to live with them. Cal couldn't bear his mother being all alone and was happy when she agreed to stay at his home.

Cal's business continued to prosper; one of many companies that prospered during the Great War and the "Roaring Twenties". Cal felt like he was the luckiest man in the world; not only did he have the money and power, he had the love of his wife and children. He never dreamed that one day everything would change.

His children had grown so much… Jack was now thirteen, while Catherine had just turned eleven. Jack was turning into a fine, young man. Jack may have taken after his father in looks, but his personality was a perfect mixture of Cal and Abby. Catherine was a younger version of her mother; which Cal was grateful for. His wife and children were Cal's whole world… which is why he felt that he failed them.

On October 29, 1929 the American Stock Market crashed, marking the beginning of the Great Depression. The consequences of the crash were disastrous, affecting both the wealthy and the poor. The Stock Market Crash happened almost two weeks after Catherine's birthday… Cal sensed something major was going to happen after reading about the crash in London, but he never dreamed that his fortune was going to take a major hit.

Overnight, Cal's fortune was hit hard. His massive fortune was now down to almost nothing… he would no longer be able to support his business or his family. The heavy losses deeply affected Cal and launched him into an ugly depression. A depression that was far worse than the depression he had gone through when he lost Rose.

Cal didn't know what he was going to do… it was beginning to be too much for him. He was now as penniless as Jack Dawson; he no longer had a way to provide for his family, despite his wife's insistence that they will fight through this. But Cal knew that he would be a burden on his family… he knew without the money he was nothing. There was no more fight in him… he figured his family would be better off without him.

Abby was worried about Cal and she prayed Cal wouldn't do anything drastic. She had read of several millionaires who lost their fortune in the crash had killed themselves, and Cal was beginning to scare her with his depression. Even though their money was gone, the Dawson family had survived the crash. Abby's parents were hit hard, but still had a large amount of their fortune intact. The Dawson family would be able to rebuild, and Abby's father had saved enough money to get through any rough times. William Dawson had talked to Cal and knew the full extent of the damage. He told Cal that he would help them…. he wouldn't be able to invest any more money to save the business, but he offered his home to them.

Luckily Abby's design commissions had been bringing a small amount of money to keep the family afloat, but Cal knew that money wouldn't last forever. Cal secretly updated his will that the remainder of the money would go to Abby and the children, and he decided for his family to move to Boston.

Abby knew that it was painful for Cal to accept his father-in-law's offer to live with them, but at least they wouldn't be homeless. Cal tried to hide the damage to their fortune, but Abby forced him to tell her everything. Abby knew how dire their situation was and was grateful for her family's help. Abby hoped in Boston that things would turn around.

Cal knew that his family would be cared for by his in-laws and was grateful for that. He sadly looked at the photo of his family on his desk and placed the frame face down. He started to think about the past… feeling guilty on how he treated people, especially Jack and Rose. He truly was lucky the night of the sinking; he should have died, not Jack and Rose. He should have let Rose go and let her be happy with the man she fell in love with. Instead he let his jealously take over, and in a cruel twist he lost the woman he claimed he loved. In a way, he deserved what happened to him. He just wished his bad luck hadn't also affected his family. They were innocent… they didn't deserve this.

Cal opened the desk drawer to reveal a silver pistol. After the crash, Cal thought that he could be strong enough to endure the stress of losing everything. He was dead wrong… his depression continued to claw at him, until it broken him down into the shell of a man that he was now. He was a failure who didn't deserve to live any longer.

Abby had just come home from the bank with a heavy heart… they were going to lose their beloved home. She tried to hold on to the silver lining that they were not going to be out on the streets since they were heading to Boston within the next few weeks. But it was still painful that they were going to lose the home they had lived in for so many years. Abby was struggling to hold back her tears, when she heard the awful sound of a gunshot echo throughout the house.

Abby felt her heart stop dead in her chest; especially since she knew that noise most likely came from the office. She ran to Cal's office to find the awful sight of her husband… dead from a self-inflicted gunshot wound. Abby screamed and broke into tears… the love of her life had killed himself, leaving her all alone to pick up the broken pieces. Tears of anger and grief flowed… she was angry at Cal for doing this! She felt guilty that she didn't do more to help her husband through his depression; feeling that she could have done something to prevent this tragedy. Most of all she cried for her children, who had adored their father and would mourn his loss. Abby found Cal's farewell note, and she cried even harder when she read it.

Cal had written, "Abby, I am so sorry for everything. I can only imagine the pain and anguish you must be going through. Believe me how I wish that things could have worked out differently. I truly am sorry for leaving you, Jack, and Catherine all alone. Ever since the loss of our fortune, I have felt like a failure. I don't know how to live without the money, nor do I have any idea of what else I could do to support my family. I would only drag you and the children down. You are stronger than you know… I have faith that you and the children will survive without me. Raise them well… I know they will grow into fine adults without my influence. Please let Jack and Catherine know how much I loved them… tell them that what I've done has nothing to do with them.
Abby, I want you to know that I'm thankful for the wonderful life we shared together. It's hard to believe that at one point, I felt that I never could fall in love again after losing Rose. You opened my heart in so many ways and changed me for the better. I only wish that our love could have been able to overcome this. I hope that you and the children will use that fresh start in Boston… I hope that you will find happiness again.
Love always, Cal"

Abby stayed by her husband's side crying, until Nadine and a police officer gently led the young widow to her room to rest. Jack and Catherine came home from school to find the police there, and Nadine quickly ushered the children to their mother's room. Abby's heart broke again having to tell her children that their father was dead and did her best to console them.

Cal's death was declared a suicide, and his death was highly publicized in the press. Abby did her best to hold her family together and held a private funeral for her husband. The funeral was a solemn one… while Abby managed to keep her composure in public, she had broken down in the privacy of her bedroom. She prayed that Cal was at peace, and that she would be able to rebuild her life once her and the children moved to Boston.

Eventually as time went on, Abby and her children lived a good life in Boston. Cal's death continued to haunt his family though, but Abby decided to focus on the good memories. Abby never remarried, but she continued her fashion design career and did her best as a single parent. Jack grew into a fine, young man and eventually became a lawyer. Catherine Rose also grew into a beautiful, young lady and followed in her mother's footsteps and became a designer. The relationship between Jack and Catherine soured when they became of age to inherit the last of their father's money… it was a nasty battle for control, and it took a very upset Abby to make her children come to their senses. To please their mother, Jack and Catherine came to an agreement and started to work on rebuilding their relationship. Jack and Catherine worked as a team, and eventually they slowly rebuilt their family fortune. The Hockley family was never able to regain most of their lost wealth, but they were able to live comfortably for the rest of their days.

Cal knew the moment when he pulled the trigger that he was dead… he literally felt his soul leave his body. He felt that he was floating, and suddenly felt as if he was underwater. He saw a bright light, and immediately thought that he was heading into the afterlife. Suddenly he was onboard a ship… a very familiar ship! Cal realized he was back on Titanic, and noticed that he had taken on his 30-year-old appearance! He realized that he was walking through the first-class entrance towards the Grand Staircase. As he walked through the entrance, Cal quickly realized that he wasn't alone… there was someone waiting for him at the top of the staircase.

The person that was waiting had his back turned, but Cal quickly recognized who it was. That posture, the simple third-class clothing, and that dirty blonde hair… Cal knew it had to be Jack Dawson!

Jack turned around and said, "I bet I was the last person you expected to greet you here." Cal couldn't hold back his surprise and said, "I am surprised to see you… am I in heaven or in hell? What are you doing here?" Jack replied, "You are not in heaven or hell, Cal. Titanic is a gateway between heaven and hell, especially for the people who died that night and for those who survived."

Cal was surprised hearing that and asked, "Then what are you doing here Jack? You were a good person, or at least a better person than I was. You should be in heaven… with Rose." Jack simply laughed and said, "Oh, believe me, Cal. I've been there. I was asked to come back… to make this transition easier on you. We may have been rivals in life, but I never wished for you to die like this."

Cal said, "Really? Despite everything I did to you and Rose?" Jack sighed and said, "Cal, despite everything, I never hated you. If we hadn't been in love with the same woman, maybe we could have been friends. In fact, I had forgiven you a long time ago."

Cal said, "I'm glad. You haven't changed a bit Jack… still the same as the last time I saw you." Jack said, "What'd you expect… that I'd age here? No… I'll always be 20 years old. I'm surprised you took on your 30-year old self… I know you were 49 when you died." Cal said, "I probably took on this form since this is who I was when I was onboard Titanic. But I'm glad that the lessons I learned over the years are still intact… I grew to hate the person I was when I was on Titanic."

Jack said, "I know… you changed. If you had truly took on the traits of your 30-year old self, you wouldn't be so civil with me. Trust me… I know you hated me for a while. It took losing Rose and your wife's love to change you."

Cal said, "My darling Abby… I can only imagine how she and our children are suffering. I loved them so much. I didn't deserve them… not after everything I've done. I thought I had forgiven myself for my past, but it all came to a head once we lost our fortune."

Jack said, "Cal, you had made a lot of progress… you let love transform you into someone better, and learned forgiveness. But you never truly forgave yourself… that was your downfall, I believe. I guess that's because you never got closure with Rose and with me."

Cal said, "You're right. Jack, the night of the sinking, I was downright jealous of you. I hated the fact that you had fallen in love with Rose, but I think what hurt me the most was that Rose loved you back."

Jack sighed and said, "It probably didn't help that you found my drawing of Rose… I still can't believe you were jealous of me. I was just a poor artist, while you were the wealthy tycoon."

Cal said, "Jack, you may not believe me, but I did love her. I did everything I could to try to get her to fall in love with me. Then she met you… I asked myself every day what did she see in you? How did she manage to fall in love with someone she only knew for a few short days?"

Jack said, "I asked myself the same thing… she had a secure future with you, but she was willing to walk away because she fell in love with me. It was fast and intense, but it was the greatest love I had ever known. I wanted a life with her, but it wasn't meant to be."

Cal said, "I should have let Rose go… if I had maybe you two would have had a future together." Jack said, "Cal, I was meant to die that night. It was my time… I was only meant to show Rose how a real love was supposed to be. I don't regret giving up my life for her."

Cal said, "What do you mean by that? Rose died with you that night… didn't she?" Jack gave a sad smile and said, "Cal… Rose is alive. She survived because I sacrificed myself to save her."

Cal was shocked and said, "How? I never found her on the Carpathia. And I searched everywhere for her." Jack said, "Cal… she hid from you. Rose saw you searching for her, and quickly shielded her face. She didn't want to go back to you, or that life that she found so suffocating. She took my last name… she became Rose Dawson."

Cal still couldn't believe that Rose was alive and well; he had spent so many years hurting thinking that he was responsible for her death. But to his amazement, Cal understood why Rose hid from him onboard the Carpathia. Cal was also curious on how Jack's death helped ensure Rose's survival.

Cal said, "I should have known… I remember looking for your name on the survivor's list, and only found a woman's name under Dawson. Jack, what happened after you and Rose ran away from me?"

Jack said, "Rose and I kept running into Titanic's lower decks. We nearly drowned but managed to escape. We went through hell and back to get back onto the boat deck. There were no more lifeboats, so we made our way to the stern. We were on the ship until its final moments. We ended up riding the stern into the cold waters… the suction separated us, but I managed to find her and saved her from a panicked man that nearly drowned her. I found a floating door, but when we both tried to climb on it the damn thing nearly collapsed under our weight. In that instant, I knew that door would only fit one of us. I made the hard choice… I put Rose on the door and stayed in the freezing water. I died holding her hand, but not before I made her promise to go on with her life."

Cal said, "My god… poor Rose. Why didn't you try harder? There could have been a way for both of you to survive." Jack said, "I loved her… I wanted her to survive. I didn't give a damn of what happened to me; I just wanted her to be safe."

Cal sighed and said, "You truly did love her… I don't think I could've have made the sacrifice you did. Tell me… did Rose keep her promise to you?"

Cal saw a bright smile form on Jack's face and had hope that Rose did go on to have a good life. Jack said, "Yes, she did. It took her a while, but Rose is living a good life. She met a man named Robert Calvert a year after the sinking, and she eventually married him several years later. She was a bit scared to fall in love again; I had to appear in her dreams to reassure her that it was okay to move on with her life. She's living a life of freedom and adventure; something that she thought she would never have. She has settled down now though… she's now a mother to two beautiful children."

Cal smiled and was happy to hear that Rose was living a happy life. He wished he could have been the one to make her happy, but he had no regrets about his marriage to Abby. Even though he had loved Rose, Cal finally realized that they were not meant for each other. Cal said, "I'm glad to hear that. Rose deserved that happy life after everything she went through. I would have only made her miserable. It took me a while to realize that."

Jack said, "It almost didn't happen… for a while Rose felt that she would never fall in love again after me. She loves Bobby now, but I know that a part of her is still in love with me. I suppose that's why I'm going to be one to greet her when it's her time. The only thing is we won't be reunited until she is 100 years old."

Cal said, "She is going to live a long life… are you sure you can wait that long?" Jack said, "I would wait forever for her. Rose was meant to do something with her life, and she is happy… but I feel she won't be at peace until she shares our story." Cal said, "You mean to tell me that she hasn't confided with anyone about her experience on Titanic. I thought she would at least tell her husband."

Jack sighed and said, "Rose feels that my memory is better off between us. She doesn't want to make her husband feel like he is competing with a ghost, especially now that they have children. He knows that she survived Titanic, but he also knows that she hasn't told him the whole story. He's understanding though; he knows how painful the whole situation was for her. I feel he would understand, but I can't force her to tell our story. That's something she has to do on her own."

Cal said, "It took me a while, but I did talk to Abby about what happened on Titanic. It felt like a huge burden was lifted, and she was so understanding. I was a bit worried she would hate me, and she was pregnant with our son at the time. I feared I would lose my family if I had told her, but she forgave me. She didn't judge me, and to my surprise she didn't hate you or Rose. She's the one who helped me realize that the person I was wasn't meant for Rose."

Jack said, "You're lucky that you found someone that loved you… Abby really did help you. She helped you become a better person. I was happy for you; it made it easier for me to forgive you. Although, I still can't believe you named your son after me. Why did you do that?"

Cal said, "I named my son after you because I finally stopped blaming you for everything, and it was my way of forgiving you and honoring you for loving and protecting Rose." Jack was touched and said, "I'm honored. I never thought you would do that."

Jack and Cal continued to talk, and Cal realized how wrong he was to consider Jack an enemy. He started to see why Rose had fallen in love with Jack and was now grateful that in death he could call his former rival a friend. Jack was able to show Cal images of Rose, and he could see how Rose had changed over time and that she was living the life she was meant to live. Jack also showed Cal images of his family mourning him, but slowly rebuilding their lives in Boston. Seeing that his family was okay and making peace with Jack, Cal finally found the closure and peace he was never able to fully have during his life. Cal felt a wave of forgiveness and peace wash over him, and he followed Jack into heaven. In heaven, Cal was forgiven, and he happily waited for the day when he would be reunited with his loved ones.

This was a whopper of a chapter! It was so hard to write, but I hope I gave Cal a fitting ending. I wanted it to be as close to canon as possible, but I also wanted to write what I think happened to him after he died. Cal was a hard character to write... I loved and hated him in the movie, but I could see that he did care for Rose. I hope this will be a satisfying conclusion to his character.

Rose's final chapter is now complete, and I will be posting it soon. I'm proofreading it right now. Until next time :)