Batman Begins: Abridged is sponsored by Joe, a guy down the road who I happen to know...
"And this is the dank part of Gotham. It's a little know fact that the pigeons in this part of Gotham, are smarter than the average boy band. The nest over there have an average of 35. Take That have an average of 4, and that's with Robbie." The Tour guide explains.
"Look at them. Completely unaware that I'm about to end them." Ra's Al Ghul monologues.
"You say something mate?"
"Dude! I'm having an inner monologue, only me and the audience can hear it, you ruined it!" Ra's Al Ghul yells.
"Sorry."
In the streets of Gotham...
"Jim! Batman gave me an antidote to a poison about to strike the city!" Rachel Dawes explains.
"Thanks, though I really doubt this poison will actually hit us. I mean, that's a little extreme for a movie where the good guy is going to win." Jim notes.
"Eat Scare Syndrome, in ultra long camera angle!" Ra's Al Ghul declares to the nation.
"Oh hell!" Jim says.
"Heeeeeere's Scarecrow! Scarecrow McScarington this is for you." Scarecrow shrieks.
"Batman to the rescue, your going down you British weirdo!" Batman yells.
"Dude! Listen to the damn reviewers! I'm Irish!" Scarecrow reminds.
"Well they don't ever mention me being Welsh!" Batman counters.
No! Seriously he's Welsh! That's not even his natural accent!
Rachel Dawes uses thunderbolt!
"Please. I'm a super villain! I think I can... AHHHHHHHH! The pain, I forgot I don't have actual powers!" Scarecrow screams.
It's super effective! Scarecrow fainted! Rachel Dawes gain 20 experience points!
"Well that was incredibly easy." Batman ponders.
"Eat Scare Syndrome, by train." Ra's Al Ghul yells again.
"Damn public transportation, when will they learn. Public Transport kills!" Batman realises.
In a random water factory place thingy...
"If that train gets to us, the entire city will be polluted." Water dude 1 explains.
"Dude, why are we stating the obvious? Is this scene really necessary?" Water dude 2 asks.
"Were just really here to pad the movie out and interrupt the action."
Back at Gotham...
"Gordan, do you know how to drive stick?" Batman asks.
"Yes."
"How about miniature tanks, that drive stick?" Batman asks again.
"Not so good."
"Tough. Now drive to under the train tracks and solve this problem the American way, by blowing it up!" Batman yells.
"What about you, Welshy!?" Jim asks.
"I need to pick a pointless fight that'll put me in great danger and have no notable effect on the outcome of this chaos what so ever."
"You need to get laid mate." Jim yells
Back at the random water factory place thingy...
"The trains slightly closer than it was last time." Water dude 1 says.
"I'm just hogging screen time!" Water dude 2 says.
Back to the relevant events...
"Hello Ra's Al Ghul. Lets end this." Batman growls.
"Fancy making an obscure pop culture reference first." Ra's Al Ghul asks.
"Not really."
"But we have to, it's the rules!"
"Screw the rules! I have originality!"
Back to irrelevant events...
"Superman, the city of Gotham is in trouble, and Ninjas of the Apocalypse are behind it!"
"Keep an eye on it for me. Frasier's on."
And back to relevant events...
"Look at you Batman. Mud on your face. You big disgrace, I'm kicking you can all over the place, singing..." Ra's Al Ghul says.
"Stop quoting Queen!" Batman yells.
"Never! Eat sword!"
"Uh, no!"
"Damn it."
In moderately relevant events that no one really cares over cause it's not Batman...
"And that's me navigated all the way to under the train tracks. Die main transportation system of Gotham!" Jim yells.
Bang!
"Well with the exception of the entire poor section of Gotham on an acid trip, parts of rich Gotham on an acid trip, a mass criminal breakout of the most dangerous criminals in Gotham, many hundred killed or wounded, mass property damage, and the main transportation system severed, we've saved the day!" Jim rejoices.
Back to irrelevant yet awsome events...
"Batman wins again!" Batman rejoices.
"You can't stop this train!" Ra's Al Ghul yells.
"I don't need to stop it." Batman reveals.
"But how?"
"Ever heard of a lackey?"
"Damn it, finish me off." Ra's Al Ghul sighs.
"I'm not like you, I'm not going to kill you." Batman says.
"Few, that was close."
"But I don't have save you. Bye!"
Congrats! You just got Rick Rolled!
"WTF!! Yeah! Real mature Bruce! That's, very mature!" Ra's Al Ghul yells, shaking his fist notably.
Train flies of tracks and crashes into building. Mass ruble falls on train. Random water exploder explodes. More rubble falls on train.
"You know to make this more realistic, why don't we take away Ra's Al Ghuls immortality." Christopher Nolan decides.
"Damn you Christopher Nolan! Damn you!" Ra's Al Ghul rants.
At Bruce Manor...
"Ha! Now that your leader is dead and your plan foiled, there's nothing you can do!" Alfred boasts in front of the ninjas.
"Lets kick the old mans arse!" a Ninja yells.