This follows on from Chapter 6/ 6M

Chapter 8

She was so comfortable in Weller's arms but she had to get up to get a drink. Weller told her to keep a bottle of water by the bed and although that did make sense she preferred to get up and go and get a glass of water from the kitchen. She loved sleeping on his chest; he had one hand in her hair and the other wrapped around her body. He always woke up regardless of what she tried so she didn't try to be stealthy anymore.

"I'm going to go and get a drink, do you want one?" Jane whispered

"Uh-uh." Weller made a negative sound and removed his hand and arm even though he was still asleep.

She moved out of his embrace and walked to the door, thankful that she didn't need to look for any clothes to put on as they, especially when they stayed at his place, always dressed after making love, well for Weller that meant putting on a pair of boxers, for Jane it meant a shirt of Weller's and some shorts or sweats. If they were at her place or Sarah and Sawyer were at Reade's place she would just don a pair of panties with the shirt and Weller wouldn't even bother with the boxers. She pulled the door closed not expecting to be away from Weller for too long, before she could make her way to the kitchen she felt there was something wrong or to be more precise different in the living room. She tried to adjust her eyes and everything seemed like before they went to bed but she still had a feeling that not all was right. Then she saw movement on the sofa. She was shocked for a moment but why would a stranger come and sleep on their sofa she thought. She moved closer to the person sleeping on it and was shocked to see that it wasn't a tall person at all. She managed to make out a few curls of hair.

"Sawyer?"

She saw the blanket move and two eyes peer at her.

"Are you ok?"

The head nodded at her.

"Are you trying to watch another of your episodes?"

The head shook to indicate no.

"Did you have a nightmare?"

There was no movement at all which answered her question.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Stillness was her only answer.

"Well you know what happens when I have a nightmare? Your Uncle helps me. He talks to me and holds me and eventually I started to tell him what the nightmares were about and just sharing that with him helped. Have you talked to anyone about them?"

Sawyer looked down.

"You haven't mentioned anything to your mom or Uncle or Edgar?"

Sawyer shook his head.

"Do…do you want to tell me?"

Sawyer shrugged his shoulders.

Jane sat on the arm of the couch.

"It's up to you. You don't have to if you don't want to but you can't stay out here all night. What do you usually do when you have a nightmare at Reade's?"

"The first time I had a nightmare at Edgar's Mom was out with some friends so it was only me and Edgar. I went to their room; he was still up but reading in bed. I thought he would let me sleep with him but he told me to go back to my room so I did. Then a couple of minutes later Edgar came into my room. He sat down on the covers and picked up the book we were reading earlier and carried on from where we left off. When I woke up I had Edgar asleep on one side of me and mom on the other in her pyjamas, she must have seen us two together and went to change out of her 'going out' clothes. It was nice. They both sleep with me whenever I have a nightmare, although it can't be that comfortable as they both have one leg on the floor, as it's a small bed!"

"That's nice, what do you usually do when you have a nightmare here?"

Sawyer's eyes darted to Kurt's room then back to Jane.

"You usually sleep with Uncle Kurt?"

Jane received a nod in response.

"Well why didn't you come into the bedroom?" Jane asked in confusion

"I'm not allowed into Uncle Kurt's room if the door is closed."

"You could have knocked; you know your Uncle will always help you when you need it!"

"But I sleep with him when I have a nightmare…"

"Ok? I'm not sure I understand."

"You sleep with him now…"

"Oh Sawyer! It doesn't matter if I'm sleeping with your Uncle or not, he would still want to help you if you have a nightmare. Just knock next time and wait for one of us to open the door, ok?"

She expected Sawyer to answer in the affirmative but he was still subdued.

"Sawyer what's going on?"

"I can't let you sleep on the sofa just because I have a nightmare. Girls should get the bed. Uncle Kurt would always sleep out here before you two shared a room…"

"Why thank you Sawyer, that's really kind of you but why would you think that I would have to sleep on the sofa?"

"Well isn't Uncle Kurt's bed for two people? If I sleep with him then you would have to move! There's no point in him moving as we both want to sleep with him and no offense Aunt Jane but I don't want to sleep with you, I want Uncle Kurt!"

Jane had to cover her mouth so she wouldn't laugh out loud at the boy's logic.

"Well you're right that we both want to sleep with your Uncle Kurt but you're wrong about one thing…"

"What?"

"Have you seen your Uncle's bed?"

Sawyer nodded his head.

"It's a big bed; it can fit all of us in it! Your mom could sleep with us as well if she wanted to!"

That would probably give Weller nightmares Jane thought with a small smile if his sister was to share their bed.

"Really?"

"Yes, really! There's plenty of room for you, me and your Uncle Kurt in his bed."

"Thanks Aunt Jane."

"You're welcome."

"Aunt Jane?"

"Yeah Sawyer?"

Jane waited for Sawyer to speak but he wouldn't, his eyes were cast down, when he looked up there were tears in his eyes.

"Sawyer?"

"What's wrong with me Aunt Jane?"

"What do you mean?"

"Why…why doesn't my dad love me?"

"Sawyer…I'm sure that…are you sure?"

Jane watched as Sawyer nodded his head.

"Have you talked to your mom about this? Is this what the nightmare was about?"

"I asked mom once and she told me that he does love me but I knew that she was lying; you know the types that parents tell to keep their kids happy like Santa is real and the Easter Bunny? Later that same day when I asked her I saw her crying. She was telling Uncle Kurt about what I asked and I promised myself I would never make her cry so I've never asked her again. I saw her cry again when we were at Edgar's…"

"What happened?"

"Well it was the day after my birthday but we were celebrating at the weekend but the next day I saw Edgar holding her as she cried because he didn't phone to wish me a happy birthday! She was sobbing. Neither of them saw me. From that day I made that promise to myself."

Jane was shocked and didn't know how to respond.

"What is it about me that makes me unlovable by my own dad?"

"Oh Sawyer, there is nothing wrong with you! Please remember that! Look, I haven't asked your mom or your Uncle about your biological father and they never told me anything. Sometimes some people are not meant to be parents; that doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. That's on them. He's missing out on being a dad to a great kid and I'm not just saying that because I'm with your Uncle."

Jane watched as the boy in front of her wiped his cheeks with the back of his hands.

"Sawyer, you know about me. My family and or friends don't even care about me. There is no way I tattooed myself so there is at least one person out there that knows me but even with all the media coverage of my story not one person came forward to say they know me. No family, no friends and no co-workers! But I made my own family. I have your Uncle and because of him I have three sisters in your mom, Patterson and Zapata and two brothers in Reade and Borden plus I have this amazing nephew! That's not bad for someone who didn't have anything or anyone a while ago! That's the great thing you can make your own family, you have a great mom…"

"She's the best!"

"Yes, she is. She adores you, you know that. Then you have your Uncle Kurt who also loves you not to mention Reade who also adores you the same amount as your mom and Uncle! Then you have me, Patterson, Zapata and Borden who all think you're a wonderful kid! You're a lucky kid."

"Yeah, I am! Thanks Aunt Jane."

"You're welcome!"

"Aunt Jane?"

"Hmmm?"

"Do you think it's weird that sometimes I think of Uncle Kurt as my dad? I know he's my Uncle but he cares for me as if I was his…"

"There's nothing wrong with that and you're right he does love you like a son. It doesn't matter to him if you're his nephew or son he loves you just the same!"

"When you and Uncle Kurt have kids will they be my brothers and sisters or will they have to be my cousins?"

"If we're blessed with kids they'll be whatever you want them to be, 'cousin' and 'brother' are just labels. What you feel is more important."

"Will Edgar still love me after he marries mom?"

"Why wouldn't he?"

"I don't know, Justin said his step dad was nice to him before but as soon as his mom married the step dad he ignored Justin. Now Justin has a little sister and the step dad just spends time with her. Do you think Edgar would do that?"

"Is that what's been bothering you?"

Sawyer nodded.

"Well, why don't I arrange for a time for Edgar to pick you up from one of your after school clubs and you can talk to him about it? As for your friend, you do know that babies are little and they don't know how to do a lot of things and they need everything done for them…"

"I know but supposing Edgar will only love his kids and not me because there's something wrong with me as my own dad doesn't love me?"

"Sawyer, you really need to talk to Edgar. I may be wrong but Edgar is not that type of person plus your mom wouldn't fall in love with someone who didn't love you! As for your biological father, as I said before, it's his loss, you're a great kid and if he doesn't want to know you then don't think about him. You have a family that loves you and there's nothing wrong with you."

"Edgar told me he wants to marry my mom and told me to think about it, he wants my honest opinion. I know he makes her happy and she deserves to be happy, I want her to be happy!"

Jane was shocked, if Edgar asked Sawyer for his permission then he must have also asked Weller for his and the fact that Weller has kept quiet could mean either he gave his blessing or not. Although he must have gave his consent as there hasn't been any awkward moments in the office recently.

"Sawyer, that's really sweet but you need to think about yourself as well. I think you will feel better when you talk to Reade!"

"Ok! Thanks Aunt Jane!"

"You're welcome! Okay, so you have a few choices to make, one where are you going to sleep? Your room, your mom's or your Uncle's?"

"Uncle Kurt's."

"Okay, so are you going to sleep on my side, in between me and your Uncle or on your Uncle's side?"

"Can I sleep on Uncle Kurt's side then you can have the other!?"

"I think that's a great idea! C'mon. I'll text your mom so she doesn't freak out when she doesn't find you in bed in the morning!"

As they walked the short distance to the bedroom Jane noticed that she didn't really close the door properly when she left the room so Kurt would have woken up when she hadn't returned within a few minutes which meant that he heard most if not all of that conversation. She was proved right when she opened the door to find Kurt not on his usual left side of the bed but dead centre so she and Sawyer would have ample room on either side. Jane tucked Sawyer in next to Kurt and surprise surprise Weller's arm came around Sawyer to hold him.

"Everything ok buddy?" said a sleepy Kurt

Jane rolled her eyes; she knew he was wide awake and just pretending to still be half asleep.

"Yeah, just a nightmare but Aunt Jane helped."

Jane went around to her side of the bed and snuggled into Kurt. She had the top half of his chest while Sawyer had the lower half of Kurt's torso. Jane felt the kiss to her temple and she knew it meant a multitude of things, I love you, thank you, you're a great Aunt etc.

"Uncle Kurt?"

"Hmmm?"

"I'm ready to be a big brother anytime you and Aunt Jane are ready to have a few babies although the sooner the better, I'm not getting any younger you know!"

"That's…that's good to hear." Stuttered Kurt

Jane could feel his heartbeat speed up and she couldn't help but giggle.