In the week that they waited for the replica of the Colt they began to plan. Sam, Dean and Bobby spent most days in Bobby's study, reading books or trying to pin down the demon's location. Weather patterns were meticulously recorded and Dean was sure he had read through more news articles in a day than he had in his life. He had given up on Bobby's demonology texts when he realised they were almost completely written in Latin, the words meaning nothing to him.

They stayed up late into the night yet every morning Dean found that both hunters were already awake, a new book in front of them. He didn't know how they did it – the research had left him so exhausted that he could barely think.

It was one of the rare instances when Sam had taken a break to fetch them food from the store, not trusting either of them without protection, when Bobby spoke up. "He didn't know about you two until your Mary died," he said suddenly.

"What?" Dean said confused.

Bobby dropped the book he had been reading back onto the desk. "Sam. He only found out about you and John a year ago. Until then Mary had told him that you were both dead."

Dean felt anger towards his mother flaring up. He hadn't met the woman but he'd hated her when he was younger, blaming her for his father's grief and his own loneliness. Over the years he'd realised how irrational that had been and had made an effort to forget her and his little brother. Though they had still made appearances in his dreams growing up, usually to blame him for their deaths.

"So she did that to both of us," he growled. "She made us both go through that pain."

Bobby nodded sadly. "She didn't want to, Dean, but she thought that was the only way to protect you. She never wanted this life – hell she married your father to get away from it. She tried so hard but when she realised that the demon had its sights set on Sam she had to leave. You thinking her and Sam were dead is the only thing that kept you safe for so many years."

"Yeah I'm sure my dad feels real safe." He glanced back down at the paper he had been reading, his jaw clenched. So, she'd left them for years but why had Sam. Bobby had said he had known for over a year.

Looking back up he met Bobby's eyes. "What about Sam?" he asked. "If the demon had gotten Mary why didn't he come for us sooner?"

"He wasn't in a good place. He blamed himself for Mary's death and the grief overtook him. He might act like a big hunter but he's still just 18 and she was the only person that he relied on. It had been the two of them fighting monsters and travelling the country since he could walk. When she was gone, he was so angry at the world. We all tried to help but he only pushed us all away." Bobby looked thoughtful for a moment. "This is the first time I've seen him comfortable around another person since everything happened."

Dean opened his mouth to protest. Sam sure as hell hadn't been open, not like most people Dean had known, but he had answered every question Dean had asked. It was only at Bobby's that Dean had seen any real emotion out of him. Comforting Sam had been such a natural reaction that, now when he looked back on it, was something Sam probably hadn't allowed in a long time.

Whatever reply Dean had was cut short by the front door opening. Sam hurried in, his hands empty of shopping bags. "They're in the town," he said breathlessly. "The demons are in the town."

Sam shoved his hands deep into his pockets to keep the others from seeing them shake. He hadn't notice the demons at first even though he'd been looking. It was the same as last time – they weren't acting different. He assumed they were keeping a lookout, making sure he didn't leave.

It was the possessed checkout lady that had tipped him off. Bobby called him paranoid but the holy water he had smeared on the outside of the milk carton could now save their lives. The woman's skin had sizzled, smoke rising from her fingertips.

Sam hadn't even waited to perform an exorcism, the rest of the people in the store had turned towards him with black eyes. He wasn't an idiot, he knew what fights he couldn't win.

"They've surrounded us," Bobby said, shaking his head. He paced backwards and forwards across his study. "The gun won't be ready for another day at least and I don't know how we would get it without them noticing."

Sam and Dean were silent. The only thing they could do was rely on the wards to keep the demons out long enough for them to come up with a plan. Except they were outnumbered and outmatched, Sam thought.

Bobby chucked demonology texts at them. "Get reading, we need something and this is our best bet."

The hours passed without a breakthrough and eventually Sam couldn't stop his eyes from sliding shut. The nights spent researching instead of sleeping and the early mornings had caught up with him. He barely felt Deans hands as he was hauled to his feet and gently guided towards their room. He collapsed onto the bed fully clothed, not even bothering to remove his shoes.

On the bed beside him he could hear twisting and turning. Eventually he pushed himself up. "What's wrong?" he asked.

Dean turned so they were facing each other, their faces illuminated by the moonlight. "Is this what it was like last time? Is this how they got Mom."

Sam frowned. "No. Last time she was fine, barely a scratch on her." He paused the next words getting stuck in his throat. Seeing Dean's look of confusion, he forced them out. "The demons got me. I jumped in front of her and was stabbed, the blade went right through me. I don't remember it but Bobby said the demons left pretty quickly after that. I guess that hadn't been part of the plan. She gave herself up to them in exchange for me being brought back to life."

Sam's hand drifted down to the scar on his chest, he could feel the rough edges through his shirt. If he ran his hand down his back he knew he would feel a matching scar. The demon had left it as a reminder that he couldn't even save himself. He couldn't save his parents. He couldn't save anyone.

"I'm sorry, Sam," Dean whispered.

Sam shrugged, turning so he faced the other way. He ignored Dean's sigh and let sleep finally drag him under, his mother's face haunting his dreams.

A/N: So I know it's been a while but life just caught up with me. I will definitely finish this story so don't worry.

Tell me what you think.