Title: Salutarem Via
Summary: After an international mission comes into light, Reid has to face the fact that his team will now need to know one of his biggest secrets: his life way from the BAU.
A/N: Hello, fellow fans! I'm sorry this took so long. I just finished midterms and started break. I am really sorry. All of you are real troopers for waiting for updates. As a reward, I am pleased to announce that Reid is coming back with vengeance. Not really, but he is indeed back in this chapter. We get a little glimpse of what he has been up to all this time.
If any of you want to give me suggestions of any sort, I am willing to listen.
I do not have a beta, so I apologize for the mistakes. I also want to apologize for the case profiler. I am not good at those, though I do feel like I am improving. I always feel like what makes sense to me and in my head does not actually work. I am so sorry.
Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds. If I could, I would buy it and undo every mistake they have made along the way. Alas, I cannot. I would settle for being a writer for the show, but that is merely a dream.
Chapter Nine: Alone in Misery
"I'm lonely. And I am lonely in some horribly deep way and for a flash of an instant, I can see just how lonely, and how deep this feeling runs. And it scares the shit out of my to be this lonely because it seems catastrophic."-Augusten Burroughs
She recognized that she should have known it would end like this. As she stared at the barrel of a gun, she regretted everything she had done in the last couple weeks. Betraying her country, she would die a traitor. Closing her eyes, she whispered her apology. She hoped that they would forgive her. She hoped that the families of those she inadvertently murdered would be merciful.
Her mother raised her to be better, she failed her miserably. Her knees bled from the hard stone weathering them down. She cried as her came to a close.
No longer useful, her body was left on an empty road. Animals chewed on her lifeless body as two days gone before her mother acknowledged that her only daughter was missing. With that report, they searched for her. They searched for a somewhat plain young woman of twenty-six years of age who always wore suites tailored to perfection. They searched for a red-head about five foot seven and a little on the thin side. They searched for Susana Hand.
As they found a grim scene at the end of the road to nowhere, they realized that Susana Hand was no more but a bloody and abused corpse. Her mother screamed in agony at the loss of her only daughter over the sound of a new cop vomiting at the sight of such a grotesque display of human remains.
Susana Hand's body was carried away. Her mother's world collapsed in on itself as she now knew that she no longer had a daughter. Now, she was all alone in this despicable universe. She detested the loneliness encompassing her life. She detested the world that took away the only thing that brought her joy. Susana Hand was no more, and she took her mother with her into the depths solitude.
Garcia needed to find Reid as soon as possible. The case was going from bad to worse, and she loathed for Morgan to be right about this-for this to be the awful case he predicted it would be. She knew that Reid could break this case wide open, if she could get her hands on him.
"Spencer William Reid, when I find you, I am going to end you for disappearing on us. Where the hell could you be?"
She sat in her dark lair with fingers dancing on her keys. She hacked her way to an answer, but she hit a dead end. As her screen froze in the middle of her investigation, her brows lowered and her lips pressed together. She needed backup.
"Son of a bitch. How in the world..."
She sprang to her feet and went on a search for a whole new person. She went to look for Kevin for she most definitely could not do this without some assistance.
He hated himself right now. He wanted to run to her calls and be there every time he was needed, but like the time he grieved Maeve he must think about himself first.
Reid knew that virus would take awhile to fix even for Garcia. She would lean on Kevin for support. He found himself about an hour or two to finish this and head home before anyone noticed.
His office door locked him away from any comfort and reassurance the outside world could grant. The grey walls reminded him of all those things he wanted to forget, reminded him of the incident that caused all of this in the first place. Eyes twitching from the long hours, he rubbed his face and yawned. He really must take a nap, but first he needed to finish this.
There had been new developments on Operation Casurus, the most important being that someone had downloaded all the information to Interpol headquarters in London. He was uncertain how much Adelaide knew, but he realized that if Manny dived into the deep end of this, Emily's arrival to the States was only a matter of time.
He pondered what he should. Should he come clean to his team the moment they come back from their case? Should he call Addie and ask for asylum before they get to him?
Reid ambled his way to a safe three feet away. Kneeling, he twisted the knob and popped the safe door open. Inside were passports, different types of currency, and many kinds of documents. He stuffed the money and passports further into the safe, but the documents slipped into his hands.
Standing up, he stepped toward his desk. He flipped through the pages. They spelled out his life away from his team. All of the cases he solved; all of classifies information to which he was privy. Those flimsy pieces of paper summed up his life's secrets.
He could tell Emily. She had enough clearance and pull to clear the rest. That was what Manny wanted of him. She wanted him to trust someone other than Addie, because Addie could die without warning. He needed someone not too directly involved. Manny knew Emily could be that person; knew that his team could be the shoulders he so desperately required.
He turned to face the computer. The screen spoke of his time in Northeastern Africa and Middle East, spoke of his time with a team that was now slowly disappearing. Printing, he added that particular mission to the stack of documents.
If anything happened to him, everything was here. He knew Addie would figure it out, and with Emily coming to Quantico, she would not be alone. His most beloved team would help her anyway they could. He ensured it, as he left something personal for his team. Something they would only see if he was not there to help them in person.
For now, he sat in an empty room wishing his sleepiness away and hoping for the moment where all of this was done and over. He just wanted to sulk in solitude.
Peering over to the right, his eyes captured the images of a bouquet of purple and blue irises. He stretched for the note...
Meet me in the cave when it opens. Don't be late.
Crumbling the piece of paper, he would go home, call Garcia, and give her what she asked; then, he would go to the cave.
She hated being alone. Her mother used to tell her that loneliness was a part of life. That there would always be moments where you could only be isolated from everyone else and that is exactly how you would survive.
She hated being alone, especially now. She was not stupid. She was more than aware that she was going to die in this old and dingy basement. That crazy man had killed her love and now was going to dispose of her. It was only natural. Why would he want to keep her around when she saw what she saw?
She was going to die dirty, cold, and scared. Most significantly, she was going to die alone. Oh, God, she hated being alone.
JJ acknowledged this as the hardest part when an obstacle seemed too difficult to overcome. Lewis West's body did not say as much as they wished it did. Marley McGuire's body was nowhere to be found. The female bodies where found first, but Lewis's body was left where they were taken (missing only hours), yet Marley was still missing.
She said, "So...are we back to square one. He went off script. What are we suppose to do now?"
Hotch stared at the murder board. He had no idea how to answer JJ's question. The unsub's new MO was too different. There profile was almost useless now. "No, we take into account the changes. What has happened for him to radically diverge from his MO?"
Rossi moved his head from JJ to Hotch, "Well, we showed up. The police have cut off all transportation from and to the beaches on our recommendation."
Hotch nodded, "Okay, so does that mean that he is keeping Marley for a longer period of time because we ruined his dumpsite, or something else? Does he have her because he can't go out hunting without risk, or because she provides him with something the others don't?"
JJ sighed, "Either way, Marley McGuire is all alone with that lunatic far longer than she should be."
They stood. Not one of them sat on the chairs the Kent Police Department provided for them. If Marley was suffering, they were more than willing to sacrifice the luxury of sitting. In the silence, all three of them thought about their current failure and the piece they were missing. They thought about Reid and how they would never take him for granted again.
For now, they embraced the desolate sting of the air and carried on with the profile.
Capital Plaza Apartments was a rather historical landmark. It had inhabitants older than the current president had been alive, inhabitants that have lived there all their lives. It was no wonder that Dr. Spencer Reid chose to live there.
As he climbed the stairs with hands holding grocery bags, number 23 never appealed to him more. He wanted to crawl into his bed and drown himself within the sheets. He wiggled his fingers into his pockets in search for his keys. Nimble and swift, he pulled them out and opened the door.
With every step, he formulated a plan of what to say to Garcia. He had been keeping up with the case, and this one was a doozy. He had his own profile and was ready for any of the questions Garcia could throw at him. He would tell her about his nervous breakdown and the failure of his past relationship. He should probably mention that Marley McGuire had a personal connection to the unsub, He made a list of the most likely candidates, though he was sure he knew who did it. If she did not ask, he could not tell her. Somethings his team had to figure it out all on their own.
He placed the grocery bags on his kitchen counter and walked to his living room to settle himself on his couch. Placing his files on the coffee table, he dialed Garcia's number.
"Sweet Cheeks! Oh, you finally answered."
Acting flustered, he replied, "Um...yes. Is everything okay, Garcia?"
"No, it is not. My babies, my computers, are acting weird, and then my other babies,you guys, need your expertise. My Chocolate Thunder called yesterday asking to see if I could get a hold of you. Apparently, they are having a rough go of it without their handsome doctor that...has...been MIA lately. I don't know what you think you are doing, but Reid we worry..."
He interrupted her, "Garcia, I apologize for not answering your calls. We keep missing each other, and I'm sorry. I thought I'd call you seeing as I just got home from the grocery store. How can I help?"
"Okay, Let me fill you in on the case. We have a lot of bodies, couples. First up was Maya Finn-Davis and her boytoy Trevor Cox. Then, we have Timothy and Allison Silverman. Next up were the Millers, Claire and Anthony. They break my heart as they had a three year old daughter. Now, we are up to Lewis West and Marley McGuire. Marley is still missing. According to the working profile, we are looking for a white man late twenties to early thirties. He appears nonthreatening, but he was able to subdue couples meaning his is either intelligent or secretly strong. There appears to be some sort of psychological disorder at play here, but the team never did have enough evidence to back up that theory."
Reid paused appearing to be thinking, "What exactly did Morgan need?"
"He just thought they were missing something, and that you may be able to figure it out."
"Well, from what I can tell. He had a major depressive episode recently which led to the killings. I think he is picking couples, because he had a past relationship fail. That girlfriend may be celebrating a major accomplishment maybe a romantic milestone of some sort. This is more than just the couples. It is about the women. They remind him of someone. When he is done with the women, he turns his hatred to the men, his self-hate." There was a pause, "Have they thought that maybe Marley McGuire may be the intended target which is why West's body suffered the most damage. It was personal. It may also explain the dramatic change in his MO. She may still be alive."
"Oh, my delicious doctor, you are a miracle worker. I will call them back immediately."
"Hey, Garcia, tell them to focus on Marley's past romantic encounters that ended badly. It does not have to be an actual relationship to her. Whatever happened was significant only to the unsub. He will mostly likely be on some sort of medication now or has been sometime in his life."
"Okay. Got it. Thanks. You really are a wonder. I'll report back as soon as I can. Garcia out."
With that taken cared of, Reid focused on the task ahead. He readied himself to head out to the cave. He had an appointment to keep according to the note. He only wished that whatever would happen would lead to the end of his secrets, because despite the calls from his team and the letters he had been receiving with all of the beautiful flowers, he walked out of his apartment door feeling like the world around him was simply falling to pieces.
A private plane landed and out came two men. There to greet them was an impeccably dressed man with a smooth voice, "Nolan, Adil. Welcome back to America. How was your stay in lovely London? Great, I hope. It seems like you have been on vacation."
Nolan spoke first dreading the response Adil would have given, "I apologize, Sir. Someone got to the chick before we did. I...we...we will make up for it."
A sinister smile slithered onto the man's face, "I will make sure you do. Now, let's get going. I have meetings to attend."
Although Nolan and Adil were glad they were not being punished for their indiscretion, something about the ease of the conversation chilled them both. Somehow they both knew this was the end to their joyous contribution to the society. He may not kill them, but he was sure going to end them.
Morgan and Glover were still in Seattle. Finishing up their business, they headed toward the vehicle ready to return to Kent with the others.
They made small talk avoiding the case just for a couple of hours. Not that it was possible, yet they tried to keep it down to a minimum.
It did not go the way they had hoped. There had been no harassment reports filed, but they said some of the officers recognized three of the four victims. Allison Silverman, Claire Miller, and Marley McGuire had all complained about being followed or disturbed in some way. Apparently, Allison's and Claire's husbands did not appreciate the upheaval and made the complaints over the phone. When that did not work, the couples marched down to the stations. One officer surprised Morgan and Glover by stating that Marley was the first to complain.
In that second, Morgan's phone began to ring out announcing Garcia. "Hey, Babygirl. You got Glover and me. Any good news?"
"Oh, God, yes! I have the best news in the whole world." She added a breathe for dramatic effect. "I was able to get a hold of Junior G-man. I actually talked to him just a little bit ago, and let me tell you. He had a lot to say about the case."
Eyebrows raise, Glover added, "Really? More than we got to say. He hasn't even been here. How much of theory could he have?"
"I'll excuse for doubting my baby, newbie. He had a lot to say. He even gave me perimeters to find a new suspect pole. Dr. Reid insists that Marley McGuire is still alive and the intended target from the beginning. He made it seem that it wasn't much about the couple, but the girls he picks. He said something about him picking the women that remind him of a past girlfriend. Marley maybe that girlfriend, so I went digging into her world."
Morgan asked, "Did you find anything?"
"Oh, mon ami, of course I did. Reid told me to look into bad breakups. He specifically said that it did not have to be a long term relationship, because it only really meant something to him. He also said someone of his mental state has had some sort of therapy and most likely has been medicated or is medicated."
Glover moved in his seat, "And?"
"Well, new guy, this is why Reid is completely and undoubtedly a miracle worker. I came up with a list of guys: one blind date, two online matches, and an a TA from one of her classes. All of which did not turn into much of relationship. Reid also said the ex-girlfriend of the psycho was probably celebrating a big achievement." Morgan and Glover heard the whoosh of her chair as she carried on with excitement. "Marley and Lewis had been dating for a while and they were looking at engagement rings. That little tidbit did not come out earlier, because they hadn't announced it to their families yet, but I found that information deep in her texts."
Morgan's grip tightened around the wheel, "How deep Garcia?"
"Try about four months. They talked and talked and finally they agreed to officially announce it about a month ago."
Glover turned to catch Morgan's stare, "That's just about when the complaints started."
Interested for even more information, Glover pressured Garcia, "What else, Garcia? Is there more?"
"Well, I looked into my list. Daniel Lyons, the TA, fits the profile. He is a twenty-seven year old white male who is in the process of getting his Masters in Philosophy, though it does look like that is not going so well. He has been in and out of hospitals for the past five years after a car accident that left him, get this, impotent. Their was enter complicated medical procedure that I don't understand here and it went wrong. Almost makes you feel sorry for the sick son of a bitch. Any-who, he lives half way between Seattle and Kent. Before you ask, I called Hotch first. They are going to met you, guys there. I sent the address to Glover's cell. Good luck and be careful."
"Thanks, Babygirl." Morgan hung up the phone. Looking at Glover, he proceeded, "Well, let's get going."
They both hoped that they could get there in time before something worse occurred to Marley. No one deserved to die alone especially alone and afraid.
Although her job required it, Emily hated plane rides. It was not that she disliked the idea, but there was something about flying that made her nervous. To be honest, the anxiety popped up when she began her career in Interpol, the second time around. She did not want to think about to far into it or she would discover things that should stay buried.
The plane was empty with only the pilot and one flight attendant. She did not want anyone coming with her to fix this problem. It was going to be her and the her team. Well, it was going to be her and her old team. She missed them terribly.
The pilot announced their landing, "We are set to land in ten minutes. Please stay in your seat and fasten your seatbelt. Thank you."
She spent the next ten minutes contemplating how she was to broach the subject of the bombings and all of her suspicions. They needed Garcia's expertise without a doubt, and Reid would definitely be a much appreciated and advantageous asset. All of the coded files would go straight to him. She also needed the profile that they had on the bombings, so she could compare it with the one Manny found registered in system. It appeared to be something the BAU would devise from the information at hand. It was polished, well informed, and absolutely created by someone with a lot of experience.
The pilot's voice echoed once more, "We have landed safely. Please enjoy your stay."
Pilling all of her stuff together, Emily marched right off the plane and into the night. She wondered if the darkness could swallow her body, because with every step that brought her closer Quantico the dread fluttered in her gut. Something told her there was more to this and it was world-shattering.
Entering the building, her feet took her where she wanted to be. An automatic response from her time here, she found herself on the sixth floor of the building. Shaking her consciousness loose, her mindlessness disappeared.
As she moved her head searching for her family, she heard a very familiar voice, "Emily! What are you doing here?"
Turning around, she said, "Hey, Pen. I really wish was here for a visit, but truth is I need all of your help."
Garcia speed walked her way to Emily, "What can I do for you? What can we all do for you?"
Reaching to her bag, she pulled out files. "I need to find a team member of mine. She was digging into this before she went missing. I don't know who to trust with this, so I knew I had to come here. She used to work for the US government before accepting a job in Interpol."
Garcia swiftly grabbed the files, "Okay, what does this all mean?"
Emily peered around them, "It means we should head toward your lair before someone that is not suppose to know figures us out. It means that I need to know where Hotch is. Where is the team?"
Practically strutting, Garcia answered, "They just finished a case and are on their way back. They should be here in about three hours, maybe even less time." She opened the door for Emily, "Okay, what do I do?"
Emily sat herself down, "Well, we need to find out the names of these people." Pointing out the codenames, she handed the list to Garcia. "I was hoping to give the information to all of you at the same time, but that is the place where we need to start."
With the list in her sight, Garcia began hacking like crazy.
Slowly, he walked to the entrance of the building. It was old and rusty looking abandoned, yet once inside it told a very different story. The shell of the building made it discrete and forgettable, but the inside was high-tech and rather remarkable.
He reached the front desk and was greeted by a friendly older woman. "Hello, Dr. Reid. I never thought I would see you around here anymore. Don't you look cute as a button"
Reid smiled, "Why, thank you, Dottie. I didn't really plan on stopping by, but you know what life is like."
Dottie smiled gingerly, "Of course, I do. I didn't get to my fifties without knowing a thing or two." She checked her computer before grinning at Reid again, "I see you are here to see dear Adelaide. Well, she got her just minutes before you. I sent her to the usually spot in room 15C."
Giving her a small wave, Reid thanked her. She quickly replied, "Always a pleasure, Spencer."
He went down the stairs and headed to the right. He inhaled and exhaled deeply trying to calm his beating heart, "Okay, Reid." He kept putting one foot in front of the other until he saw a door with 15C stamped at the top. Turning the handle, he opened the door.
There in front of him was Addie pacing back and forth. She abruptly halted her movements and tilted her head upward to get a good look at his handsome face. Awkwardly, he joined her in the middle of the room. Before he could get out a proper hello, she wore a somber expression and her eyes shined with glassy tears she held back.
She gave him a bleak and crooked smirk, "We've been compromised." Twisting herself to avoid seeing his own mask breakdown, she carried on, "Two bodies have been discovered. One appears to be Quinlan Samuels, but the other has been confirmed to be Susana Hand, my assistant." Pausing, she chuckled softly, "Two more bodies. I told Ortiz to move Manuela to another location, but I have no idea if they made it out in time. I haven't heard back. I also have officially requested that Jacoby Samuels be taken under surveillance. Thing is he hasn't been to work, so chances are he is also dead. We just haven't found the body.
"So, Dr. Reid, I also have to report that Emily Prentiss from Interpol has landed in the country. She is currently digging into this operation looking for her agent. I imagine that once she finds out that you are also involved that these bastards are not going to live long. On the other hand, we also have word that two men that have been on our list for a while have just enter the country."
Reid asked, "Are they one of theirs?"
Addie nodded, "They have traveled from London. It does not take a genius to put to and to together."
Reid stepped back trying to gain composure. His brain flew a million miles per minute analyzing all the possibilities. He winced in pain bringing the other reason for the union to the forefront.
"I also have this for you." Her hand went inside her bag and pulled out a bottle. "It's an experimental pain killer. You have more long nights ahead of you. You can't be distracted by pain." Silence followed the passing of the pills from Adelaide to Spencer.
No longer strong enough to hold back, tears painted her cheeks. Spencer held her tightly trying to console her in anyway that he could, "It's going to be okay, Adds. You'll see."
Removing herself from his warm embrace, she cradled his face with her hand, "Oh, Billy Boy, I am so sorry...for all of this. I am so so very sorry."
Pulling her closer, he shushed her. They stood there for three minutes before separating. Quiet welcomed in the devastatingly lonely and greeted them like old friends. With each passing second, both Lancaster and Reid grew further away from the cruelty of their lives and discovered a new fantasy of wondrous isolation. Their delicate reality stumbled and broke in half, and their sanity gradually was falling apart too.