Frisk wouldn't say another word, and though he was sure his brother could have explained it, he stayed silent. He was getting frustrated with both of them, all over again, but being the Great Papyrus meant overcoming little obstacles such as these as they arose.
To his credit, Sans, at least, looked frustrated as well. His brother probably had nothing more than guesses and theories, and, as much as he'd like to see how those compared to his own, it made him feel better than suspecting that Sans had it all figured out already, and was refusing to tell him.
The human… knew more than they were letting on. At this point, he was sure of it. But what could he do apart from remaining a good friend, and letting them tell him when they were ready?
The silence was rather awkward, but maybe he was the only one who thought so, because neither of them spoke up as they followed him the rest of the way to Hotland.
They passed yet another station that Sans was supposed to be manning… "SANS! YOU NEVER ASKED UNDYNE FOR THE DAY OFF!"
That refuse-to-care chuckle of his… *she knows where we are.
They walked across the bridge, and past the water cooler. "LAB?"
*like… laboratory.
"LABRADOR-Y? DOES THAT MEAN THAT THERE ARE DOGS INSIDE?"
*i mean… i wouldn't rule it… Sans broke off as he looked a Frisk, and he lost interest in whatever he'd been going to say.
Normally he'd pretend to be grateful for that sort of intervention, but… "FRISK, I REALIZE THAT MY BROTHER'S PUNS ARE BOTH CONSTANT AND TIRESOME, BUT YOU NEEDN'T TRY SO HARD TO APPEAR BORED."
The human looked startled. "I… I'm not bored."
Sans shrugged. *yeah, the kid must've just heard that one before. He walked through the door, a little reluctantly.
He followed his brother, nervous about what dog, exactly, would be waiting for them. "WAIT! SANS! LOOK! IT'S A LAB!"
Frisk looked at him like he'd just said that outside.
"SANS LOVES THINGS LIKE THIS. YOU KNOW… SCIENCE FICTION. ESPECIALLY IN REAL LIFE!"
Frisk looked more sad than bored, now, but they glanced over at the door before it opened, like they were watching an television episode that they'd already seen from a slightly different angle.
A monster about the size of his brother and the human rushed out, and spun into a panic when she saw them.
*hey, alphys.
"S-sans? W-wh-what are y-you d-doing here? Wh-why are y-you with the hu-human?"
"YOU KNOW EACH OTHER?"
She smiled weakly, and looked around nervously at them all. Sans glanced at the dog food bag that looked, strangely like the one he'd once had in his room, then proceeded to pick up one of the papers from the desk and scan it.
"I-I mean, I s-saw you on m-my cameras, but… I wasn't e-expecting you to f-follow the human th-this far…"
She looked nervous, so he struck a heroic pose to comfort her. "WE ARE ASSISTING FRISK, THE HUMAN, THROUGH THE UNDERGROUND!"
"O-oh… W-wow, th-that's… um, y-you know… um, great." Her eyes darted to Sans again.
"BROTHER!"
*huh? Sans turned to him, then seemed to shake something off, allowing the paper to drift back to the table.
He tapped his foot. "I KNOW YOU PROBABLY FEEL RIGHT AT HOME, BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN BE RUDE! NOW APOLOGIZE."
*sorry, bro.
"NOT TO ME!"
He chuckled. *sure, bro. sorry, alph. guess i was just kinda 'determined' to be a bad house-guest.
For some reason, she looked more nervous than ever. "Wh-what? N-no! Um,… y-you c-can l-look at wha-whatever y-you… um… w-want… I mean… i-it's j-just l-laying there… r-right?"
There was a strange noise in the next room. "O-oh no! He's h-here already!"
"WHO'S HERE? WHAT'S WRONG?"
"M-Mettaton! I, um, s-sort of, well, you see, what with all the threat of humans a-against the underworld and such…"
*wait… that'swhat your security upgrade was?
"Um, y-yeah… we just haven't n-needed him to, um… so, he's been… um, doing his sh-show thing."
"WHAT ARE YOU TWO TALKING ABOUT, AND WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH METTATON?"
Frisk was the only one in the room that didn't look surprised when the Underground's shining star burst through the wall, his signature theme song playing.
"SANS! LOOK!"
His brother was leaning against the desk, looking like meeting the most famous monster in the Underground, other than the king himself, was no big deal.
"Yes, look, my beauties! It's time to start today's program, and…"
"WAIT… ARE WE ON TV RIGHT NOW?"
"Ohhhhh yes!" The robot posed expertly for the cameras capturing the show. "Let's give a warm welcome to the human! Never played before, Gorgeous? No problem! There's just one rule. Answer correctly… or you die! And who's this with you, hmmm?"
Frisk didn't even blink at the consequences for losing. "Um, these are my friends; Papyrus… excuse me, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, and Sans."
"Excellent, Darling. And will your friends be helping you today?"
"Um… I…"
"OF COURSE! THAT'S WHAT WE'RE HERE FOR. I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, AND MY BROTHER, SANS, ARE ASSISTING THE HUMAN THROUGHOUT THE UNDERGROUND."
"Wonderful. The more the merrier, Darlings. Let's begin."
Mettaton pulled a sheet of paper from a compartment in a grand sweep, knocking Alphys to the side. She stumbled a couple steps closer to Sans who gestured to the pile behind him. *seriously, alph, is everythin' alright?
"O-of course. W-why wouldn't it be?"
He didn't have time to hear more, and Alphys raced back to Mettaton's side anyway. "Alright then, first question, Darlings!"
Alphys calmed down considerably, until he started to read. "Which of my shows had the most popular viewing record of all times?"
Frisk and Alphys both gasped in shock. "Th-those aren't the questions you were s-supposed to read!"
"Well todays the day I run my promotional adds, Dr. Alphys, and I can't be expected to break schedule. I have my own set of questions set aside for this occasion."
"B-but…"
"Is the answer A: Fabulous Me, B: Big Deal on a Wheel, C: A Star is Made, or D:…"
"NO, NO, NO! THE ANSWER IS OUR HISTORY, THE MUSICAL!"
"That is… absolutely correct!"
Frisk sighed in relief.
Moving along, What line did I make famous in my three part series, "I Love Mettaton? Is it, A:…"
"SHOWBIZ IS FOR THE BOTS!"
Mettaton made a show of checking a card. "That answer is, correct! But let's see if we can't stump your cultured friend with this next one, Darling! What is this a picture of?"
He knew this one, too! "THAT'S A METTATON BRAND CANDY WRAPPER UNDER THE LEG OF A METTATON BRAND CHAIR FROM THE SPECIAL CHRISTMAS EPISODE THAT FEATURED THE ENTIRE CAST PLAYED BY METTATON!"
Lights flashed, bells rang, and confetti fell from the ceiling. "I had more questions, but it's no use asking them, with such a learned fan answering!"
Frisk and Alphys stared at him. Sans gave him a thumbs up from the desk he was still leaning on.
"Later, Darlings!" Mettaton rolled out, and Alphys quickly launched into an apology to Frisk while Sans sauntered over.
*hey, nice work, paps.
"THE QUESTIONS WERE SO EASY… I FEEL BAD. SHOULD I HAVE LET FRISK ANSWER?"
*nah, buddy. i'd say you were a real 'show stopper'.
He crossed his arms. "AND A GOOD THING, TOO. BECAUSE I HEAR THAT METTATON 'KILLS'."
It wasn't just his eyes; Sans's whole face lit up. He didn't comment on the pun, but he didn't need to.
"UM… WELL, ANYWAY. WHERE TO NEXT, HUMAN? WHAT? YOU'RE WAITING FOR A PHONE UPGRADE? OH! I SHOULD GIVE YOU MY NUMBER! THAT WAY, YOU'LL BE ABLE TO CALL IF WE SHOULD BECOME SEPARATED FOR ANY REASON."
"That'd be great, Papyrus. And I should give you my number, too."
"REALLY? THEN I'D HAVE THREE WHOLE CONTACTS ON MY PHONE! IN CASE YOU'RE WONDERING, THE TWO I ALREADY HAVE ARE SANS, AND UNDYNE."
"Sure thing. Just as soon as she gives my phone back. Thanks for the help with those questions, by the way. I thought I was in real trouble there, for a minute."
"OF COURSE! I WATCH ALL OF METTATON'S SHOWS. IF HE TRIES THAT AGAIN, WE'LL BEAT HIS GAME JUST AS EASILY!"
"H-here you go. I made a few modifications th-that should really help you out."
"THANK YOU! WE SHALL VENTURE FORTH, MORE PREPARED!" They headed for the back door, but Sans turned and started walking backwards at the last second.
*'preciate it, alph. just let us know if there's any way to return the favor, k?
The royal scientist was sweating. "Oh, um… s-sure… d-don't mention it. Please."
A/N: Another public thank you for a reviewer I can't thank privately. Thanks so much for the review! And I wanted to say, well played on the name, 'I guest as much'. It made me smile almost as much as your kind comment. I hope I can keep it up!
Thanks, everyone, for reading this far!