A/N: HEY FRIENDS!
So I know I said I was only going to focus on the Road Trip AU but I got a few requests to continue the texting piece and I had already started a second chapter for that like two months ago so I finished it in my spare time. I had so much fun writing this, y'all don't even know :D
IMPORTANT NOTE: I do not support underage drinking or drunkenness in general! I included this for fictional hilarity. In real life this would be an absolute disaster. But as a fanfiction it's great.
I also want to let y'all know that this story is complete randomness and its purpose is to try and make you guys laugh. And I really hope that happens, because I was laughing way too much while writing it.
There will still be a chapter coming up during winter break! Never fear, readers! Also, thank you for reading and reviewing! My favorite part of updating this fic is going back and reading all the kind comments you guys send me
HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO MY FELLOW AMERICANS! AND HAVE AN AMAZING WEEK TO THE REST OF Y'ALL!
Disclaimer: I do not own the Lunar Chronicles
~o0o~
(Cinder added Winter to the group chat)
(Cinder added Jacin to the group chat)
Winter: Hello friends :D
(Jacin has left the group chat)
(Cinder added Jacin to the group chat)
(Jacin has left the group chat)
(Cinder added Jacin to the group chat)
Cinder: Stop being difficult Jacin
Jacin: I did not ask to be a part of this
Cinder: It's a helpful tool for all of us to communicate
Iko: YAAASSS WINTER AND JACIN ARE HERE ITS PARTAY TIME
Jacin: …
Cinder: Okay sometimes we also use it for recreation
Kai: Wait, you can leave the group chat?
Cinder: KAI
Kai: okay sorry
Wolf: hhji gusys
Iko: Omg Wolf your typing somehow got even worse
Scarlet: don't bug hij
Iko: Yours too, Scar
Scarlet: IM MISSING A PINKY SOMETIMES I HIT THE WRONG LETTER OKAY
Thorne: MISSING FINGERS CLUB UNITE!
Winter: I have eleven fingers
Winter: Oops I miscounted just ten
Scarlet: You're crazy but I love you anyway
Iko: Careful girl, Jacin and Wolf may get jelly ;)
Jacin: That literally makes no sense
Jacin: Why would Scarlet's comment make me and Wolf want to purchase jam
Iko: OMG I CANT EVEN YOU'RE WORSE THAN KAI
Kai: True
Jacin: ?
Cress: Jelly means jealous, Jacin
Jacin: Thanks shortcake
Cress: doNT CALL ME SHORTCAKE
Jacin: …
Cinder: …
Scarlet: …
Kai: …
Thorne: That's hot
Iko: That's the most aggressive thing I've ever seen Cress do
Iko: Except when she told off Sybil cuz that was savage
Jacin: Savage?
Kai: Don't even try, man.
Cress: Sorry guys. My favorite net drama just ended and I'm a bit emotional right now.
Iko: You also got stabbed by your bf
Cress: Yeah that too
Winter: THE PHONE SCREEN IS BLEEDING
Jacin: WHERE ARE YOU I'M COMING
Winter: Oops Wolf just splattered ketchup on it
Wolf: I lieke toamtoeas
Thorne: Dude are there hotdogs in the Rampion? I thought we were out
Winter: Nope he's just squirting ketchup in his mouth
Thorne: …
Jacin: …
Cinder: …
Kai: …
Scarlet: That's hot
Jacin: So was there a specific reason why you added both of us? We already won the war
Cinder: Yes actually…
Kai: It's something Cinder and I have both wanted to discuss with you guys for a while now
Iko: OMG YOU'RE PREGGERS?!
Cress: (Preggers = Pregnant)
Jacin: Thanks
Jacin: WAIT WHAT
Winter: Congratulations, cousin! I wish you all the happiness in the world
Thorne: Dang Kai that was quick
Thorne: Score for the pansy princess
Kai: Don't call Cinder a pansy princess
Thorne: I was talking about you
Cinder: I'M NOT PREGNANT
Iko: OMG YOU LOST THE BABY?!
Winter: My deepest condolences, cousin
Cinder: NO I WAS NEVER PREGNANT TO BEGIN WITH
Iko: OMG KAI GOT SOMEONE ELSE PREGNANT?!
Winter: Congratulations, Cress! I wish you all the happiness in the world
Cress: what
Scarlet: Wait, why did you assume it was Cress?
Winter: Because, Scarlet-friend, your scary boyfriend would beat the living crap out of Kai
Wolf: tru
Thorne: And who's to say I wouldn't?! COME AT ME BRO
Kai: Okay, first of all, no one got anybody pregnant. Unless any of you have something to tell us?
Cinder: Not pregnant
Cress: Same
Scarlet: Same
Winter: ^
Iko: Wait let me check
Iko: Okay I'm good
Kai: Second of all, I would totally crush Thorne in a fight
Thorne: LOL
Kai: What is lol?
Jacin: I KNOW THAT ONE
Jacin: Sorry I got too excited for a second
Cress: LOL = laugh out loud
Thorne: Cress, who would win, me or Kai?
Cress: You're both strong individuals with different strengths and weaknesses
Kai: That's the nice way of saying you'd lose
Kai: Who would win, Cinder?
Cinder: Thorne
Kai:
Kai:
Kai:
Thorne: BWAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
Scarlet: Wasn't there something you were trying to tell us, Cinder?
Cinder: Yes! Kai and I have an announcement!
Kai:
Cinder: Go ahead Kai
Kai:
Cinder: Fine. You would kick Thorne's ass in a fight. Can we please continue now?
Kai: Thank you.
Kai: And the announcement it… drumroll please…
Kai: Cinder and I are getting married!
Kai: :D
Cinder: :D
Scarlet: Oh.
Iko: That's it?
Thorne: I thought we were getting ice cream or something
Wolf: smaem
Cinder: Woah woah woah guys this is huge! Why aren't you happy for us?
Cress: We are! It's just not really news…
Thorne: Yeah. It was pretty obvious that you guys were getting hitched any time now
Winter: Congratulations, cousin! I wish you all the happiness in the world
Jacin: Are you just copy and pasting that into your phone?
Cinder: Oh. I guess if this isn't news than you don't care about the bridesmaids and groomsmen… ;)
Iko: Easy. I'm the maid of honor, of course, and Scarlet, Cress, and Winter are the lamer but still cool bridesmaids.
Cinder: Crap, am I that predictable?
Iko: That and I've known you for like 9503458342 years :D
Wolf: wiat, thenk who'sa Kai's bset man?
Thorne: Umm, translation please?
Scarlet: He's wondering who Kai's best man is going to be
Scarlet: And so am I, actually
Thorne: Well, obviously it's me
Jacin: Negative. If it's between me, you, and Ze'ev, it's definitely me
Kai: … isn't that a bit presumptuous? I've only known you for a few weeks
Jacin: Yeah but the rest of your friends are lame
Thorne: EXCUSE ME
Wolf: ESKCSE MEW
Thorne: KAI AND I ARE LIKE BROTHERS
Thorne: I STEAL FROM HIM
Thorne: I CONSTANTLY MAKE FUN OF HIM
Thorne: I SPIT IN HIS FOOD
Kai: Wait, what?
Thorne: OF COURSE I'M THE BEST MAN
Wolf: AND I iactually dontje caret\=
Kai: Guys my best man isn't going to be any of you, it's Torin
Wolf: …
Jacin: …
Thorne: did you just misspell my name orrr
Thorne: Cuz it's T-H-O-R-N-E not T-O-R-I-N
Kai: Torin is my advisor
Thorne: but he's old
Kai: So?
Kai: If he asks tell him I said he wasn't old
Thorne: No way that guy would be cool at a bachelor party
Kai: I'm not having a bachelor party
Thorne: Oh yes you are
Thorne: The legal drinking age here on Luna is 16
Thorne: :D
Kai: I'm not going to drink! I'm the Emperor!
Thorne: So?
Cinder: I agree with Kai on this one. It just isn't a good idea. Someone may try to get him drunk and then reveal earthen secrets. I know we won the war, but tensions are still high
Thorne: Im not going to bother reading that
Wolf: yeahd. Tooolong.
Iko: But Cinder, what about your Bachelorette partyyyyy D:
Cinder: What?
Scarlet: LIT
Iko: I've been planning it since Kai came to the mechanic shop!
Cinder: WHAT?
Kai: You knew I was going to marry Cinder back then?
Iko: Okay so at first I was the bride but then I saw you too had a thing so I switched it to Cinder's Bachelorette party :D
Winter: I've never been to one of those! It sounds fun!
Jacin: Oh no, you're not drinking anything
Winter: Why nottttt
Jacin: It's not safe
Winter: My friends will be with me, and it's not like I haven't been drunk before! Remember the Lunar ball last year?
Jacin: I do. That's why I'm saying you can't drink.
Winter: Now that I think about it I have no idea what happened that night
Jacin: You don't want to know
Iko: (They probably made out)
Winter: I would want to know that though…
Cinder: Guys I haven't even agreed to this party
Iko: DO IT
Scarlet: DO IT
Cress: I really don't want to pressure you into anything but it sounds fun
Winter: DO IT
Cinder: OKAY FINE
Iko: WOOHOOOOO!
Thorne: Awww they get to have a party and we can't?
Thorne: Can't I just stuff some socks down my shirt and come with you guys?
Cinder: No way. Besides, you'd make a really ugly girl.
Thorne: Pshhhh I could get more phone numbers than all of you combined
Thorne: Except you Cress you're beautiful and I love you
Cress: I'm not going to try and get peoples' numbers 0.0
Thorne: OH THANK THE STARS
Kai: Okay… if Cinder is having her bachelorette party here, we can have ours here as well.
Thorne: YESSSSSSSSS
Wolf: coolp
Jacin: This is going to be disastrous
~o0o~
Cinder: Kai
Cinder: Kaiiiiii
Cinder: KAIIIIIIIII
Kai: Cinder are you okay? What's going on?
Cinder: I'm at a bar
Kai: Okay… anything else?
Cinder: nooo
Cinder: But Scarlet called me a lightweight
Cinder: whatever that means lol
Kai: Oh stars
Scarlet: Don't worry, emperor. We're taking care of her.
Cress: hey guys we're group chatting weeeeeeee
Scarlet: Well I'm taking care of her. Iko's got her hands full with Cress.
Iko: DANCING WITH CRESS IS SOOOO FUN! SHE'S THE ONLY OTHER PERSON I'VE EVER MET WHO KNOWS ALL THE JUST DANCE MOVES FROM THAT OLD WII THINGY
Iko: I wish I could get drunk…
Thorne: Cress is drunk? Do you need me to go over there and take her back to the Rampion?
Thorne: TO LET HER TAKE A NAP OKAY I'M NOT THAT GUY ANYMORE
Cress: im not drunk im cress
Cinder: hi cress im cinder
Cress: i have a friend named cinder thats so cool!1!
Jacin: WHERE'S WINTER
Scarlet: Oh crap. Uh… Iko?
Iko: I thought you had her!
Jacin: OK GUYS NOT FUNNY
Jacin: GUYS IM SERIOUS
Cress: hi serious im cress
Jacin: WHAT BAR ARE YOU AT IM COMING RIGHT NOW
Scarlet: Calm down I just found her!
Jacin: Oh thank the stars
Scarlet: She was leading a conga line
Jacin: of course she was
Winter: Hi friends! I love you all soooo much
Kai: Don't tell me she's drunk too
Winter: What are you talking about all I've had today is water
Winter: I should probably change that
Iko: I'll chaperone!
Wolf: sdlfj;lerjg'ho;lakjjjjjjjjjjj
Scarlet: Z?
Wolf:fdf;ljejltgmlaepokopr
Scarlet: Guys what's happening over there?
Thorne: He thinks he's texting you but is just pressing a bunch of buttons
Thorne: His texting gets even worse when he's drunk, apparently
Wolf: asfknlklknewflgrg
Thorne: Well said, buddy
Scarlet: Wait Z is drunk?
Jacin: Oh yeah
Kai: Very much so
Scarlet: Damn I really don't want to miss that
Kai: Hey you're watching Cinder!
Cinder: hey kai
Kai: Yes?
Cinder: I really want to kiss your face
Cinder: like right now
Cinder: where is your face
Kai: Cinder I don't think that's appropriate right now…
Cinder: fine ill just find a different face
Kai: WAIT WHAT
Kai: SCARLET!
Scarlet: She's making out with some dude's hamburger
Thorne: Send pics pls
Iko: Oh yeah I'm taking a bunch using my internal camera
Wolf: asfjkdfkwejjgoweopro'
Iko: This is going to make the best wedding scrapbook ever
Winter: I have acquired drink
Jacin: Oh dear Lord
Winter: Iko got it for me. It's a new kind of beer I've never tried before that is made of roots
Kai: root beer?
Winter: Yes! That is the name!
Jacin: Nice thinking, Iko
Iko: I do my best *hair flip*
Thorne: heeyyyy cress where u at gurrlll
Kai: And another one bites the dust…
Cress: omg its thorne heyyy
Thorne: I had this crazy idea
Cress: haha what mister smith get it mister smith cuz that was your name lol
Thorne: ok ok ok
Thorne: so
Thorne: you know how cinder and kai are doing the married thing
Cress: ya
Thorne: we shuld too
Cress: YA
Jacin: Hold up where did Thorne go he is no longer in the bar
Thorne: IM COMING FOR U BBY
Jacin: Oh stars he's going to get run over
Cinder: nooo thorne cant get married first
Cinder: kaiiiii
Cinder: lets do it nowww
Kai: hey cindr yeah lets do it I love you so much and I want to kiss ur face 2
Cinder: 3
Jacin: Wait when did Kai get drunk?
Kai: I drank vodka lol
Kai: I almost threw up
Kai: lol I just did
Wolf: sakdfjlkdfn
Scarlet: IM COMING Z
Wolf: SDAFKJSDF;LKSJFLKERJOIET
Jacin: SPADES WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO
Jacin: EVERYONE IS DRUNK AND RUNNING AROUND THIS GOD FORSAKEN PLANET AND I AM TECHNICALLY LIABLE SINCE IM IN THIS STUPID GROUP CHAT
Jacin: IKO WHERE'S WINTER
Winter: I'm right here! I'm on my fifth root beer and I still feel sober… but I guess my "sober" is the average person's "drunk"
Jacin: IKO WHY AREN'T YOU STOPPING EVERYONE ELSE FROM LEAVING
Iko: Are you kidding me? My ships are sailing!
Jacin: WHAT
Winter: I don't want to be the only one not getting married
Iko: Yeah join the club
Jacin: WE ARE NOT GETTING MARRIED
Winter: D':
Iko: Woah dude harsh
Jacin: No no no no please don't cry
Jacin: Winter
Jacin: Winter answer me
Jacin: Listen, Trouble, when I said we aren't getting married I meant we aren't going to throw away the most important day of our lives in a dusty city hall with a bunch of drunks
Jacin: When I marry you I want my parents there and all of your friends
Jacin: I want it to be absolutely perfect
Winter: So… you want to marry me?
Jacin: One day, yes. I want to marry you.
Iko: OMG IS THIS A PROPOSAL
Winter: :D
Jacin: WAIT WAIT WAIT I'M NOT GOING TO PROPOSE OVER TEXT
Jacin: Screw it. I trust the others will safely find each other.
Jacin: WINTER I'M COMING
Winter: :D :D :D :D :D :D
Iko: THIS IS SO CUTE
Iko: DAMN IT WHERE'S LIAM KINNEY WHEN YA NEED HIM
Iko: omg he's right over there
Iko: omg he's coming over
Iko: omg omg omg omg omg
Iko: okay im going to decide that everyone is okay and talk to him
Iko: im sure everyone's fine
Iko: right?
~ To be continued…