Chapter 7
Regina and I marched in the St. Patrick's Day parade two weeks after my dinner with Killian. She and Mary Margaret had told me I was leading Killian on, and warned me to stop before it was too late. I decided that day that I would make it clear that we were just friends. I didn't know how to do that exactly, so to me it seemed like I was being really cold and mean towards him. I texted him all throughout the parade, but I wasn't as friendly as I normally was. After the parade and after Regina and I had eaten dinner, I was alone in my room. I felt bad for leading Killian on, and I felt bad for being so rude to him that day, so I decided to apologize.
E: I'm sorry for being so cold towards you today.
K: That's okay. I was just worried because I thought something was wrong.
E: No, I just feel like I've been leading you on, and I don't want to because it's not fair to you.
K: Yeah
E: Sorry
K: And I fell, hook, line, and sinker
E: :(
K: I love you :/
E: I'm sorry
K: And I'm so sorry for that
We didn't talk at all the following day, Sunday. On Monday I got a text from Killian saying that he still wanted to be friends and that he was sorry for making anything awkward. I happily accepted and also apologized.
Things were going very well between Killian and me, but it seemed that we were only friends through text message and for the limited amount of time that we were in class together. Over spring break I went home and he stayed at school, but we still texted a ton. Mary Margaret, Regina, and I had a sleepover at Regina's house over break, and I talked with Killian the entire time (I wasn't rude to my friends; I still paid attention to what we were doing). After the other two had fallen asleep, I continued to talk to Killian, and the conversation was starting to get personal. I asked him how many girlfriends he'd had, and he said one, but it was the superficial type you have in high school that's just for show. We talked about what we looked for in a relationship, and it seemed that the things we each wanted were very similar. I eventually asked him if he'd ever told another girl that he loved her, and he said he'd only ever said it to one person. I was astounded that I was the first person he ever loved, so I asked him why he loved me. I quickly realized that was a bad idea, and said he didn't have to tell me. That was the night I realized I loved him back.