Crazy trouble with love part 4
Neo and Ren
Series: RWBY
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-Vale, Omni Ice cream parlor-
"Omni!"
"Yes Yui?" Said person asked in a female form and giving ice cream to some kids.
"I think we're out of rocky road."
She turned. "Really? All out, but we had a refill yesterday."
"Look in the back if you don't believe me."
"Kind of busy here." She said while seeing some teens walking in. "Welcome to Omni Ice cream parlor, I'm Omni and I'll be helping you fine gents and gals today."
"Well it's Renny that wants to order. I'm kind of on a diet." 'I hate it!'
"We have yogurt if you want."
"I'll take it!"
"Ok, pick what you want oh and little lady." She said looking at the redhead. "We have a half off sale on double sundaes for couples like you and the blonde." 'Matchmaking, love it.'
"W-W-We're not a couple." she and Jaune blushed.
"Really? But you two are holding hands."
They went wide eyed seeing it was true and averted their eyes.
"Anyway, what do you want?"
"I'll have coffee yogurt!" Nora grinned.
"No!" cried the others.
"Aw! Come on, it's only yogurt."
"Nora, get something else."
She pouted. "Fine Renny, I'll get a pancake yogurt."
"We don't make them, it's not even a real flavor."
"Well then what do you have?"
"We do have banana, dust, hairball, and for some reason hamburger flavors." Omni sweatdropped. 'Yui, damn you and your joke flavors!'
"Hamburger then."
"Ok," she smiled while looking at the two 'love birds'. "And since you wanted the couples sundae I'll just put in vanilla ice cream."
"We're not a couple!"
'Yeah and I'm not a girl.' "And you sir? And might I recommend the Neapolitan ice cream, it's a hot topic with our customers."
"Eh, why not." he shrugged.
"One or two scoops?"
"Two."
She typed it up and looked at the amount. "That will be ten Lien. You're lucky too sir, the shop is having a half price day today."
"Sweet." smiled Jaune.
"It will be about ten seconds." She said while using a portal to give them the ice cream.
"What was that?" Asked Pyrrha in surprise.
"My Semblance. It can open portals to anywhere." 'And more.' "Have a great day you four. Especially you two lovers."
'We're not lovers!' they thought as the group left.
'Keep telling yourself that.' Omni laughed in her head before looking at the ice cream. 'Oh dear we need more Neapolitan...oh well it's not like anyone's going to want any today.'
As they rounded the corner Neo herself was walking to the same shop.
'Ah what a nice day for ice cream.' She thought with a smile before taking a glance of JNPR. 'Hunters, meh they are fine, but really bad for business.'
"Welcome to Omni Ice cream parlor young child." Omni smiled. "How may I help you today?"
She brought out her Scroll and typed something down before holding it up.
"...so you're twenty? Wow who knew that midgets were that small?"
She frowned and typed something else down.
"Hey! I'm not a bitch!" She glared. "And sorry I was just joking that time." She calmed down. "So what is it today? I recommend the vanilla cat ball flavor yogurt." 'Ew.'
Neo grimaced and shook her head before holding up another message.
"Neapolitan with sprinkles? Oh my I'm sorry but someone just took the last two scoops."
She looked at Omni in horror before holding up another message.
"It's true. This guy with a pink strand took it. And I don't have any left, plus the shipment won't arrive for another ten weeks."
Her jaw dropped while dropping her Scroll.
"Um miss? Maybe you could choose another flavor? We have vanilla, devil's cake and dust flavor." 'Please don't be an assassin! I had enough with Akame Ga Kill!'
She closed her mouth and grabbed her Scroll before leaving.
'That was close.'
BANG!
She gulped seeing her fire a bullet from her umbrella and shot at the ice cream vat behind her. 'Assassin, I feel bad for those kids.'
(With Neo)
'This guy is dead!' She thought with anger. 'That was MY ice cream!' she sped up and spotted the team getting on an airbus. 'I'll just use my Semblance right now.' She then changed into her other form and ran into the bus.
"Yum. This is really good yogurt Renny." smiled Nora eating scoop after scoop.
"Don't eat too fast." Jaune said while being embarrassed by the 'couple' sundae. "Or you might get a brain freeze."
"Ha, I can handle that one Jauney."
Ren rolled his eyes while eating his own ice cream. Not knowing that a black pigtailed girl was sitting next to him until he finished the first scoop. "Oh, um, I could move if you want miss?"
She just ignored him.
'I guess not.'
'Let's see, I could kill him now but that might get me a unwanted conflict with this bastards team.' Neo thought before getting an idea. 'But what if I kill him mentally? It's not my strong suit but it might work.'
And so the trip back to Beacon went on without any incident. Even if Ren felt a little uncomfortable with the passenger next to him, or that Nora made Jaune and Pyrrha kiss visa ice cream to the lips. Soon they landed all of them got off.
'So this is Beacon?' Thought Neo while getting off as well. 'Kind of boring compared to some places I've been to.'
"Ugh...so much yogurt." groaned Nora holding her stomach. "Why didn't you stop me?"
"Because if we did you would have gotten mad." Ren sighed.
"No I...ugh...too sick to argue Renny." She groaned.
'Saw that coming.' He thought as they walked into the school.
'Time for work.' Neo smirked.
(Next day)
Ren slowly woke up and yawned before getting out of bed. He headed to the bathroom and turned the lights on before going wide eyed. "What...the hell." In the mirror was him, but he was wearing one of Pyrrha's bras and panties. The sexy kind to boot.
"Ren?" Called Pyrrha while walking into the bathroom. "Are….what are you doing with my underwear?!"
"Pyrrha! I swear it's not what it looks like!"
She glared before using her Semblance to make all the metal in the room 'attracted' to Ren. And by attracted it meant making a perfect wall figure of him in the wall. "Pervert."
'Why did this happen?' Ren thought while feeling dirty.
'He he.' Neo laughed in her mind while hiding in the closet. 'Step one complete, now for step two in my one million step plan of death!'
(Later)
'Ok, just calm down and focus on class.' He thought while looking at Glynda teaching, not knowing that a certain someone was right next to him with a ton of spitballs pointed toward her.
Spat!
Glynda saw the spitball and turned her head. "Who did that?"
Spat!
"...mr Lie. You think this is funny?"
"What?"
"Did you shoot a spitball at me?"
"No. I didn't!"
She narrowed her eyes before looking away.
Spat!
Spat!
Spat!
Spat!
"Mr Li-"
SPAT!
Ren's eyes widened seeing a massive spitball in Glynda's mouth. "I swear it's not me!"
She spat it out. "See me after class." She growled before turning around.
'He he he.' Neo chuckled under her breath.
(After class)
"I'm telling you it's not me."
"Then why did you spit one at my mouth? To get attention, honestly, I expected this from mr Winchester not you."
Ren groaned since he wasn't getting through to her.
"If you keep this up I'll have no choice but to give you detention." She sighed. "Now hurry along to class."
"Yes Miss Goodwitch." He said while walking out of the room. 'This is getting weird.' He entered the next class with professor Port, but found that something was off.
And that was seeing a tied up Port with his beard shaved and hanging in a cat suit with a note reading 'Ren Lie did this' in bold on his face.
"What the fuck?"
"You really did it this time Ren." Spoke Cardin. "I mean I'm a jerk but this...this is too much."
"But I didn't-"
"Lie Ren! Get me down now or I'll make your detention last ten more weeks!"
"But Professor I didn't do it!"
"Get me down!"
"I'm disappointed in you." Spoke Weiss. "Trying to make a name for yourself by such crude tactics. For shame!"
"Don't go blaming me! Someone's trying to frame me!"
"Then why the picture?" Spoke Blake handing him a picture of him giving the bird. "That was on...his butt." 'Why Ren? You aren't this mean...right?'
"I don't know what's going on!" He yelled.
'He he, now to make him even more unhappy.' Neo though while disguised as a chair next to Ren before throwing a stapler at Ruby.
"Ah! Ren, what the heck man?!"
"I'm right here! How could I have grabbed it!"
"Wait!" Nora yelled. "I know what's happening!"
"What?"
"Renny's Semblance mutated to make him unseen by humans and Faunus! That's the only explanation!"
That made everyone facepalm.
"What? It's true, I've seen it in action so why are you thinking it's impossible for something like that to happen?"
"It just feels out of place and convenient."
That was when Ren noticed that his hands were kind of in the worst possible spot to be right now.
Yang's hair.
"REN!"
"Bu-"
PUNCH!
"GAH!" He cried out while flying out of the room and falling out a open window...which was on the third floor. "SHI-"
CRASH!
"Ow…" he groaned while hitting the ground hard.
(Next week, Saturday)
'I hate my life.' Ren thought while holding a broken arm. 'And I think my karma is going down the shit hole.' he was resting on his bed and wanted to just disappear. Especially when he was now hated by many of the student's and teacher's. Even Nora hated him because of 'him' pulling down her panties in public and calling her fat. Yeah that was why his arm was broken...again.
'Maybe I should just leave and become a hermit.' he thought with dread before seeing a faint strand of pink and brown hair near Nora's bed. 'What the?'
'Oh this is good. Only nine hundred more deaths to go! Hahaha! Oh if only Roman was here he would be so damn proud of my evil plan!' thought Neo while hiding herself as a blanket.
'Now that's not normal.' He thought before seeing Jaune walking in.
"Ren. Just stop with this crap and maybe I wouldn't keep you here while we train." he grumbled before Ren noticed his pants and underwear were gone. "Is it breezy in here or something?"
'CAN'T UNSEE!' he thought shutting his eyes.
"What is...AH!" he jumped while covering his crotch. "REN!"
"It wasn't me!"
"Then who else? The Tooth Fairy!?"
"How the hell can I do that if I'm still in my bed you idiot!"
"Hey! I'm not an idiot!"
'He he.' Neo laughed as Jaune pulled up his pants and stormed out. 'Ok that was worth it.'
Ren growled and stood up. "That's it! I'm done with this place!"
Neo watched as he stormed off and smirked. 'Maybe I'll just kill him one more time. Call it square as they say.'
(With Ren)
'I'm going to be a hermit and no one's stopping me!' he thought stomping through the halls. Only to realize he forgot his weapons and turned before seeing the same girl from last week in front of him. "Oh, it's you."
She smiled while typing on her Scroll and showed it to him. 'Hello there. Long time no see.'
"Yeah, well it'll be the last cause I'm leaving this place."
She typed again. 'Why?'
"My friends and teachers are idiots and some bastard is blaming me for all sorts of trouble."
She smiled. 'Really? And did you do it?'
"NO!"
'Time to make the final death a reality.' She thought before typing. 'Then do you want to know who framed you? :)'
"What?"
She smiled. 'It's simple.' she changed back to normal. 'It was me! Ahaha!'
"What the?! Who are you?" he spoke in surprise at the sudden change in appearance.
'I'm Neopolitan or you can call me Neo.' She typed with a smirk. 'And I'm your doom! Ahaha!' 'I love theatrics.'
"So you're the one who's been trying to make my life hell? Why?!"
'Simple. You took my Neapolitan ice cream!' She growled in anger. 'And now since you ruined my day I thought I return the favor by mentally killing you!'
"...ice cream? You did all this….over ice cream?"
She nodded. 'You messed with the wrong assassin. So I hope you are happy learning who was making your life hell! Ahaha!'
Ren felt his eye twitch and took a deep breath before punching the wall with his one good hand and growled. "You're dead!"
She laughed. 'Try and come at me. No one will come and even if they did they wouldn't believe you after my Semblance made them see only you as a criminal!'
"...again you're dead." he spoke before making a grab for her. But missed while getting hit by a copy of her. "What the?"
The copy restrained him while the real one just smirked as a blade came out of her umbrella.
'Shit! I really am gonna get killed!'
'Time to die!' She thought before raising her hand up.
"Wait! How about we make a deal?!"
She stopped at that before typing on the Scroll and showing it to Ren. 'Like what and make it fast. I have to report to my superior soon.'
"What about this? I'll get you more ice cream if you stop 'killing' me and give yourself in for the crimes? We get out easy and both of us will be happy right?"
'Hmmm, I get ice cream, but give my identity up.' She thought before smirking. 'But I could just make a loophole.' 'Oh? And you expect me, an assassin with enemies everywhere, to just turn myself in just like that? You're cute, but not that cute, handsome.' she raised her arm up again.
"What else do you want from me damn it!?"
She smirked before showing him the screen. 'Mmm, how about we do this. I'll stop killing you and take the ice cream but you have to promise not to reveal my real self when I 'turn myself in'.' She changed her appearance for a split second. 'If you know what I mean.'
"Or," he elbowed the clone in the gut and got out of the position. "I'll just punch you so hard your head flies off!"
She frowned at that before smirking as she turned tail and ran.
"Get back here!" he yelled before running after her like the devil in heels.
-Emerald Forest-
'Ok, according to Roman's reconnaissance reports there is a patch of Grimm somewhere around here.' She thought while running faster from the Hunter. 'I can let these beasts take care of him for me!'
"I'm gonna wring your neck!" He yelled in fury. "And then use that umbrella to take YOUR EYES OUT!"
'...thats kind of hot. Too bad I have to kill you.' She thought before noticing that gravity was off. 'Huh?' She looked down and saw nothing under her. 'Oh SHIT!' "A-AHH!"
Ren saw her begin to fall and lunged before grabbing her hand with his one good arm.
Neo's eyes widened at that. 'He...saved me?'
"For an assassin, you sure don't pay attention to your surroundings." he groaned trying to keep a hold.
She glared at that.
"And you know," he smirked. "I could just drop you right now for all the shit you put me through."
'No no no! I can use my umbrella as a parachute but not when I'm hanging from a cliff!'
"Hmm, it's awfully tempting." he idly remarked 'accidentally' slackening his grip.
"E-EEP!" She squeaked while feeling really scared. 'No no no! Anything but that!'
"Then again, maybe a better deal could change my mind."
She gulped looking down at the bottom of the cliff and turned to Ren before nodding frantically. 'Anything just save me!'
"And maybe if you don't kill me when I pull you up. I mean it would be bad if I 'lost' my grip."
She felt the hand loosening and nodded her head even more frantically in fear.
"Good." Ren lifted her up all the way while she sighed in relief. "Now the deal."
She took a long sigh before typing on her Scroll. 'Ok, how about you give me the ice cream and I'll help clear your name? And to make sure nothing goes wrong, I'll email you a copy of the deal to your Scroll. And yes I saw your email one time ;)'
"Alright, but be warned because at this point I have nothing else to lose and I will take us both down." he replied in a deadly serious tone.
She nodded while typing up the deal. 'It's sounds one sided. Mmm….he he he.' she finished typing and showed the message. 'I'll send it once your end of the deal is done. No pressure or anything.'
"Good."
Neo smirked in her head. 'Oh he's going to love the fine details.' 'Now Ren Lie, let's get my ice cream :D'
"It's just Ren."
'Ok then Ren.' She typed before causing the world around her to change to the same ice cream parlor as before. 'And yes I can do this. No idea why but it helps sometimes.'
Ren's eyes widened before shaking his head. 'Don't think too much on it.'
"Oh hello again." Spoke Omni with a smile. "Let me guess, you two want some ice cream?" 'And not killing me.'
"Just her." Ren sighed.
"...well are you sure? I mean the Neapolitan ice cream just got restocked and its couples get free ice cream day."
"NO!" he cried before grabbing Omni by the front of her shirt. "This all started because of that! I don't wanna eat another bite until the day I die!"
A portal appeared above his head and a hammer landed on him.
"Just stop, it was a suggestion you fool!" Omni growled. "Really treating a lady like this is just rude you shit head!"
He let go and grumbled. "Just give her the ice cream."
She smiled while giving Neo a large ice cream sundae. "Here you go young lady. That will be free of charge, granted your boyfriend helps out." 'Payback bitch!'
"I'm not her boyfriend."
Neo nodded while walking away and sat down at a table. She gestured to Ren to sit down as well. 'Oh this is too perfect. Especially the little part in the deal.'
'This better be worth it?'
(Later)
'Yep, worth it big time.' he though relaxing on his bed while Jaune and Pyrrha were fanning him. After finding out the truth, they were willing to make it up in anyway, and he made it clear it was gonna be a long way for him to forgive them. Especially Nora and Yang who are now his personal maids for a long while.
However he didn't read the email from Neo yet because of the whole thing and since he was bored...why not take a look?
Ren took out his Scroll and clicked on the email. 'Mmm ok everything is in order. I, Neo will clear Ren Lie's name and honor and in exchange Ren Lie will give me ice cream and…' "HUH?!"
"What's wrong Ren?" Asked Yang serving him tea.
"That sneaking little...she tricked me!"
"Tricked you?" Asked Nora confused.
"Take a look!" He showed them the email while had a small message. 'And for Ren Lie to be my boyfriend and eventual husband at the end of two years. If you're reading this I hope you like the new Neopolian Lie~ :D'
"WHAT?!"
Ren groaned while feeling like an idiot for making the deal.
(With Neo)
Neo smiled while annoying Roman with her umbrella. She grinned before showing him the deal on her Scroll.
"You got hitched while I wasn't looking? Well don't expect a big gift at the wedding."
She sighed. 'Ok, oh and this was the guy that was at that raid. Where you used the mech remember? ;)'
"Fuck!"
Neo laughed at that while the screen went black.
