Butterflies

"Me? I'm nobody. I'm not skilled like Uchiha-san. I am not passionate like Haruno-san. I am not smart like Nara-san. I'm not as strong as Chouji-san. I'm not as collected as Aburame-san. Or as pretty as Yamanaka-san. I'm not as confident as Inuzuka-san. If anything, I'm like Hyuuga-san, socially awkward. Oh wait, no, she's just shy. The socially awkward one is me." OC! Team 7 remix!

Chapter 18 – Talk to me

8-8

"You were there." I say, my voice far calmer than my emotions. My hands are crossed, my head tilted to one side, my eyes piercing his. "When she died. You were there." Poor Pakkun whimpers behind me, obviously sorry to put his boss through this. He probably didn't think I'd figure it out.

"Yes." Ecchi-san admits. I hear the sorrow in his tone. I don't care. That sorrow won't bring her back.

I know all I need to.

8-8

The sun is almost setting. Ecchi-san decides it's best to call it a day. We're supposed to start investigating the settlements in the morning. We head back to camp, set up a rotation, and we call it a night. Technically, only Ecchi-san calls it a night. I am too annoyed, to upset, too… too many things to sleep. I know sleep won't come, so I don't bother to pretend.

Instead, I just sit and gaze into the fire. I'm grateful it's still a ways away from me, but… I don't know; it helps for some reason. It's entertaining if nothing else. There isn't enough light to read, not enough warmth at this distance to be comfortable, I don't want to disturb anyone –not even Ecchi-san, though he'd deserve it– so I won't play my flute. And even though Pakkun already went home –wherever that is– I don't feel like practicing sound release for the same reason. So gazing into the fire is all I have.

Mama, you're bleeding!

No, sweetie, it's someone else's blood. Mama's alright.

I shake my head. Years of not thinking about these things. Years. And now I'm faced with situations that just keep tugging on the wrong strings. Strings that pull on strings that call up all the memories that can bring me to my knees.

"Sis?" I turn to Naruto-nii, wondering what he wants. "I've got first watch, you know. Try to get some sleep."

"Can't sleep." I tell him honestly. I have too many things on my mind, none of them nice.

"Come here." He motions for me to come to him, already reaching into his tent and grabbing a blanket. I just stare at him. "Come on, sis, at least you'll be warm and comfortable." I roll my eyes, but don't disagree with him. So I sit between his legs again, letting him wrap me up in his blanket.

I remember this feeling so well. This warmth. Not just because he's warmer than the night air. It's… his wanting to do this. Just like papa. I don't remember much about him, but I do remember papa wrapping me up just like this, with some warm cocoa while it snowed. Papa even opened the paper screen doors so we could look at it snowing outside. Wrapped up, just like this.

"What's on your mind?" Naruto-nii asks.

"My parents." I tell him honestly. I know that Ecchi-san will probably hear me, but I think I just need to get this off my chest. It will just keep bothering me until I do. "Papa used to wrap me up like this when it got cold. I loved watching it snow like this."

"Sounds nice." Oh, Naruto-nii never knew his parents. This must be hard for him.

"Sorry."

"For what? We didn't ask for this." He sounds so… not like himself.

"No. but…"

"We'll just make some new memories, sis. Winter should start in a month and a half. Let's wee what we can come up with." I nod, snuggling into his warmth a bit more. Thinking about the past still hurts… but at least now I have a hope for the future.

8-8

"Namiki." I start, my eyes popping open. Aw, Naruto-nii stayed out here even though that person's watch, just so I would get some sleep. "Your watch."

"Nn." I nod to show I'm awake and hear him. Then I turn to my personal heater. He's half asleep. "Naruto-nii, it's alright. Go to sleep."

He mumbles a bit, I'm not sure what he wanted to say. He doesn't argue though, and he takes his blanket with him into his tent. I hear his snores not a moment later. I really need to do something nice for him. I wouldn't have been able to sleep otherwise.

"May I talk to you?" Uchiha-san asks politely. Overly politely, seeing as he's actually using 'may' instead of 'can', probably knowing I'd have some stupid comment for him.

"Depends."

"On?"

"What, why, and how much of my time you want."

"… I…" He looks away. I sigh. I just barely woke up, Uchiha. I don't feel like dealing with puzzles! "I'm sorry."

"… is that all?" I don't like being cold to people that clearly mean it. But I don't know what he's sorry about, why he would bother apologizing about it, or what he expects. I know nothing other than he's 'sorry'.

"Namiki, it's not easy to talk to you." He sounds annoyed.

"Then go talk to your fangirls." I've been itching to let that one loose on him.

"… the reason I want to talk to you, is because you aren't one." He looks away from me, trying to hide whatever he's feeling. I'm too busy staring in shock though. "Could you not do that?"

I shake myself, trying to wake up from this… shock. There's just no other word – none that I know at least, but I'm sure Sensei would know one.

"That's why I wanted to talk to you that night. I knew you wouldn't let me in, but you might let Naruto in. You know?" Okay, who are you and what have you done with that perfectly hateable Uchiha from the academy?

"Honestly, I would have. Let Naruto-nii in, I mean." Keep it up, Uchiha-san, and we'll be girl-talking in five minutes.

"Why?"

"'Why' what?"

"Why him?" He sounds annoyed for some reason. "We were so alike during our senior year, keeping people away. Then suddenly, you turn into Miss popular. I don't understand."

"I blame Ino." I smile a little. I tell her that all the time too. "I didn't want things to be this way. I wanted to be alone. To be… away from people."

"I know. That's why I'd always admired you." His cheeks are a bit pink for some reason.

"Uchiha-san. Do you have a crush on me?" If he does, I'm SOOOOOOO going to hook him up on every single one of those fangirls.

He snorts. "Idiot." Thank Kami-sama! "No, but I respect you." I can live with that.

I let the silence drag out for a bit. "You're wrong though. We were nothing alike, then and now."

"…" He looks curious. "How so?"

"You kept people away because you didn't want attachments. You didn't want people to die on you. You didn't want to hurt anymore. Right?" He nods, his eyes hollow. I can tell he wants to know how I know that, but he waits. "I kept people away, because I didn't want to hurt them."

He's studying me, trying to figure me out. "What do you mean?"

"I was going to join Anbu. Do everything for Konoha. Give everything for Konoha."

"Including your life?" He guesses. I shake my head, trying to will away the last of my sleepiness.

"Nn. Ask Ecchi-san just what the life expectancy is in Anbu."

"Three years, but six months on average." He answers evenly. "He was in Anbu." Ah, the clan killer. A horrible shadow to live in.

I try to force myself to wake up a bit more. This conversation is actually interesting – depressing, for sure, but interesting. Seeing no other option, I bite down on my thumb's knuckle, hard. The pain wakes me up instantly.

"That's why I stayed away from people. I didn't want to hurt them." I look away from the teeth marks dented in my skin, and focus on the sad looking person across from me. He eyes me, weary and careful. "I'm still not really sure how it happened, but…"

"You said 'was'."

"Hmm?" I just finished saying a whole lot of words. Be more specific.

"You said: 'I was going to join Anbu'. Why 'was'?" He asks, his eyes carefully studying me again.

I sigh. "Reasons."

"Is it Naruto?" I smile a little. Yeah, it kind of is. I think losing me would hurt him, and I don't want to hurt him, not like that. "And maybe Chouji?" I blush. Stupid, observant, idiotic moron.

"I thought so. That's one reason I've been so careful to not get close to people. I don't want to fall in love. I don't want that kind of weight around my neck." Now there's the hateable jerk I remember! Welcome back!

"Moron." I snort, both at his stupidity and my thoughts. "I grow stronger every day for them. Knowing that Chouji-kun is too soft-hearted… knowing that Naruto-nii needs someone strong enough to watch his back and help him train. Knowing that Ino needs a kunoichi that's strong-minded enough to show her how stupid she's been. That Hinata-san needs someone to show her just how deep her potential runs. And to motivate that lazy Nara-san too. Kami-sama knows that even Ino has her hands full with that one."

"…" He's staring at me with wide-eyed, jaw-dropped, can-barely-feel-his-face, fish-out-of-water shock.

"They need me, Uchiha-san. And that's enough for me."

"You'd give up on your ambition? For them?" He asks, his voice barely more than whisper.

"No. My ambition hasn't changed. Save as many allies as I can, kill as many enemies as I can. I just have a deeper reason to crawl my way back home when I'm done." I say, smiling. Naruto-nii would probably be the one dragging me back half the time; stubborn as sin, that Nii-san of mine.

We're quiet for a long while. He's obviously trying to process what I just said; his problem. Me? I mostly just cursing that there isn't enough light to read. I'd really just to be able to read right now.

8-8

At the end of my watch, I toss a pebble into Ecchi-san's tent. His annoyed groan tells me all I need to know. When he drags himself out, nearly a minute later, I stay put. Too much digging into my past, too much dredging up old ghosts while staring into the fire. Sleep won't find me again, not unless I crawl into Naruto-nii's futon… and that's REALLY embarrassing! What if he thinks I'm Hinata-san!?

"I'm up, Aya. Go to sleep." I don't answer him. I don't want to talk to him. I don't want to waste words on someone that couldn't do the simplest thing: keeping your teammates alive during a mission.

I continue just staring into the flames. I don't know why, I really hate fire.

"Trouble sleeping?" What part of my silence tells you to ask me a question, exactly? And since our 'little chat', how many words have I spoken about you, to you, or even in your presence?

"We might end up fighting bandits. Did you have a plan to make your hair less of a vulnerability?" It's called 'wasting your breath'. And of course I do! French braid it, tie it with ninja wire and tuck it into my jacket. Idiot.

He sighs. "Aya, may I talk to you?" So he was listening. Still, Uchiha-san wasn't there when my mother died. He didn't fail to bring her home to me. So you can go sit on a hot coal, Ecchi.

8-8

"Listen up. I'm going to be scouting those settlements over the coming days. I want the three of you to study these scrolls on Anbu sign language. I will be testing your knowledge by only speaking to you from now on in Anbu signs. I'll be leaving my pack here to guard you. Please stay in or around the camp. And do not give me a reason to write you up when we get back to Konoha." Ecchi-san says that last bit mostly for me. I don't care.

He goes through the motions again, summoning eight dogs instead of just the one. Pakkun I remember from yesterday. Then there's a black bulldog with a spiked collar, the largest of the pack. And big enough for Pakkun to ride on his head? Awww, CUTE! The next has brown fur with white patches on his muzzle (that's what you call that part of his mouth and nose, right?) and his bell and parts of his legs; he has angry eyes though. Another has grey fur with what looks like a brownish Mohawk? Aww, and two of his paws are wrapped in bandages, poor thing! Another is really small, brown with darker brown patches and the kanji for 'shinobi' on his forehead. Another has tan fur and dark sunglasses? That's weird. Another is more orange-brown, and his head and neck are mostly wrapped in bandages too. The last also has tan fur, but his whiskers are really obvious.

All eight of them are wearing blue jackets and Konoha headbands. I shrug. Must be a uniform of sorts. Still, I refuse to go nuts over all the cuties with Ecchi-san still here and on my jerk-list; mama had a much more colourful name for that list.

"Once I've scouted all the settlements Naruto showed me. I'll be coming back to take each of you in turn to scout one with me. I expect the three of you to act like adults. Is that understood?" I wave Ecchi-san off, already reading through the scroll he gave me. Frankly, that's the most civilized I've been towards him in a while. "Aya, whether you have an issue with me or not. For the duration of this mission, I am still your commanding officer. I would prefer it if-"

"And that attitude is why she got pissed with you last time, Kakashi. Just give her time." Naruto-nii points out.

"No, Naruto. She doesn't have to like me, but the fact remains that she has to show proper respect. This is something that she has to learn, even towards someone she hates. Aya. Please answer me properly."

"Bite me." How's that for proper? Ladylike enough for you? I can always choke up something nasty and spit it on your sandals? Maybe scratch my backside? How 'proper' do you want it, exactly?

"We need to talk about your manners, sis. Really." Naruto-nii complains. I snort. Look who's talking. I've seen how you are with Hokage-dono. If it wasn't for me hitting you, you'd still be as bad as Uchiha-san in his presence.

8-8

#Captain.# I make the sign, wondering what word I know actually fits how I feel about that jerk. There aren't a lot of names to call people, mostly just actions. #Untrustworthy.# That they have a sign for, but it's not the whole story.

#Details# Naruto-nii signs back to me.

#Unable. Little. Few. Communications.# I hate that I don't know all those signs yet. I mean, the scroll Ecchi gave us describes over a hundred and fifty signs, but that isn't exactly enough to communicate socially. Sure, 'stop', 'order', 'fall back', 'attack' and 'kill' could be useful, but not really socially geared.

#Speak.# He looks at me curiously. He probably really wants to know why I am the way I am.

"He was there when my mother died." I say, not caring that Uchiha-san can hear me. If Naruto-nii wants to hear this, he'd better accept what hearing this means. "That means he didn't save her. And no, Pakkun, I don't care what you have to say about that."

"Don't you-"

"No, Nii-san, I don't want to know what happened. The past doesn't change because of it." Why are we still talking about this?

"Fine, but how is this helping you?" And since when are you so wise, oh idiotic one?

"…"

"Aya makes more sense than you give her credit for, Naruto." Uchiha-san says. Naruto-nii turns to him, wondering what he means. "It isn't easy to let something like that go. Even if Kakashi had nothing to do with it. Even if he's just a victim of circumstance. The fact remains that she comes home to an empty house. Having someone to blame… it helps."

"Then I'll be there when you come home!" Naruto-nii announces. Tear fall before I can help it. "If your house being empty, if that's the problem, then let me fix that. We can move into your parents' house together. It'll still be way too big for just us, but you won't come home to an empty house 'ttebayo! We can take turns cooking and washing up. And you can show me how to use the washing machine… 'cause we both know I'm no good at washing clothes."

"Nii-san…"

"Come on, sis. We're already together all day every day. I mean, the only thing I even do in my apartment anymore is sleep. And it would be awesome to watch it snow from the porch. Making snowballs in the back yard. Hey, if it freezes long enough, we could try skating on that little pond too! It would be totally awesome! Believe it!"

I glomp him, hiding my face in his jacket. "Idiot." I say, crying into his embrace. "Moron. Stupid. Jerk."

"Hey, I'm your big brother. Being a moron's kinda part of my job, you know." He teases, rubbing my back to comfort me. "Just remember that I'm your moron… well, yours and hers."

I snort.

Don't… don't every change, Naruto-nii. Please?

8-8

Ecchi-san decides to get 'the worst' out of the way first. That means, I get to play follow the Ecchi through the woodlands, across rivers, and towards the settlement I'm meant to help him scout out. I thank Kami-sama I'm almost decent with that water walking thing; I'm still dry, but I feel like a baboon in a tutu.

Once we're a comfortable distance away from the settlement, I notice three things. One, there are armed guards at the entrance. Two, they look like bandits. Three, there's a line of people being marched into the settlement in chains, and whipped if they don't obey.

#Captain. Request. Closer. Look.# I sign to Ecchi. Heh, this way I still don't have to talk to him. There's no sign for 'ecchi' though. I'm still not happy about that.

"Give me a preliminary report first." He mumbles. Mumbling travels less than whispering, so that's the better option.

"Bandits. Two guards posted outside, slaves being dragged in. Judging from the size, maybe enough for fifty to ninety bandits?" I guess. I'm not sure. I need to get close to see how well organized they are inside. "Wooden fences, shrapnel lining the outside dirt surrounding it. They would keep civilians out, but not shinobi. They travel primarily by boat. These could be our guys." Stupid mission requirements. Stupid forcing me to talk stupidness. I don't WANT to be professional with you, Ecchi!

"Good. We're not here just to scout. We're here to take them out."

"Solo?"

"Yes, solo. There are three other camps we're taking out. One each solo, one as a group. I want to make sure you three are as good as you'll get." Ecchi-san tries buttering me up again. I huff. "Come up with a plan while we're scouting around. We'll discuss that plan after, then we carry it out. You'll be going in solo. I'll be your support and backup. Understood?"

"Yeah." I other words, this is my last day alive.

I snort. Not a chance. I'm not going to let Naruto-nii go through life alone. I still have to hook that boy up with Hinata-san. I have to be at their wedding. I have to be there when he passes out during the final stages of labour.

I. Am. NOT. Dying. Not her. Not today.

I crack my knuckles stretch my shoulders and back, to make sure all my muscles are loosen and ready for action. Alright. Party time.

8-8

It's barely three hours later when I stroll into their camp, singing. It's too small to actually consider a settlement, and it's too big to call a compound. Whatever. It's just a word to describe their crappy, stupid place.

Once I make it to the centre of their… place… I look around. Everyone's staring at me, their eyes glazed over to show they've succumbed to my genjutsu. The advantage of sound release and loving to sing. All I have to do is continue making a note, and they'll just keep falling into my genjutsu. I could have done it with my flute as well, but I need my hands for this, I plan on taking them out before my voice gives out.

Unsheathing my kodachis, I flip them around so that the blunt edges are against my forearms. It curves out slight, reaching just past my elbows. I'm such a chibi.

Still, whatever. This chibi kunoichi is about to rain hell down on these bandits. Let's see now. Hmm, interesting. The bandits inside are coming out here to see who's singing. How convenient. They're even pushing each other aside to get out here faster. How cute. And so much easier for me.

Two buildings are set up within the outer wall. One has two storeys, the other only has one. All the bandits are coming out of the two-storey building, so I'll just guess that's where they sleep. The other is probably storage, or whatever. Ooh, there's a balcony on the second storey as well. And there's quite a gathering there. It's getting a bit crowded up there.

Well, let's test the limits of my 'Sound Release: Siren's Call' then. I walk up to an unimportant looking bandit. He goes down in a spray of blood. Hmm, he didn't even fight it. I can live with that. Let's see then. The big, buff one over there looks important. I'll tie him up later. Let's see just how many of these idiots I can take down before I need to worry about Ecchi-san, shall we?

8-8

Still singing, still keeping up the simple genjutsu. Thank Kami-sama it isn't too chakra-intensive. The big, stupid, buff one is almost tied up properly. I've already tied his feet and shin together, now it's just his forearms. He should be the last one too.

I've basically slaughtered the bandits. The slaves are sill over to one side, still in chains, and still very much under my genjutsu. I wonder what they see though. I mean, I know I'm making the genjutsu pleasant –pleasant enough to let them die in peace– but what is pleasant for them? Something I'm sure I'll never find out.

Once I'm satisfied with my work –meaning that everything from the man's elbow to his wrist has no chance of moving without breaking something– I stop singing, allow the genjutsu to end.

"Wha… what happened here!?" The man looks around, seeing the carnage I've left behind.

"Huh? Oh, they wanted to take a nap." I answer him. The slaves snap out of the genjutsu too; I can tell because they're freaking out. The man I've tied up turns to me. His one eye takes me in, and he… has no clue how to respond. I don't blame him. I didn't even tie up my hair. I must look like some random little girl, but I'd taken out his entire gang. Sad for him.

Oh so sad for him.

"So this is what it comes to then. A little girl ends up taking us out? What a joke." He really can't believe it. At all.

"That's nice. I hope you get a few laughs. Now." I kick him in the back, hard. I hear something snap and he grunts, obviously in pain. I walk around and grab him by the hair. "There was a theft some time ago. Oyster farmers a ways up river from here. Do you know anything about that?"

"You mean Fukui? Nah. Not my style. We only target people with cash, or good looking ones without." I knee him in the gut. Luckily, seeing as he's on his knees, we're about the same height. So it's not as hard as it might be.

"So where did you get the slaves?" I ask. He grunts, fighting to catch his breath.

"Land of Wave. Boss's been having us sneak them out for months." He doesn't even act like he wants to lie to me. I wonder though.

"Who's your boss then?" I ask, unsheathing his wakizashi. Hmm, it's a bit long for me, but I more or less handles like my kodachi. It isn't reverse edged though. And the sheath is just plain white, how boring. I haven't seen any pretty weapons here at all.

"Name's Gatou. From Gatou Corporation." Ah. The one after the bridge builder. Coincidence?

"What do you store here?" I continue, not bothering to let him know what I'm thinking.

"The girls, drugs, cash, and some weapons." He answers immediately.

"The slaves are all girls?"

"Yeah. Like I said, we only go after cash and pretty girls without." I kick him right in the nuts. HARD.

He bends over forwards from the force of the blow. He coughs a few times, trying to force himself to breathe. "Are you expecting anyone to come here?"

"No…" He coughs a few more times, trying to catch himself. "We're supposed to deliver the drugs to another of Gatou's gangs. Down the river from here."

"One last question. Have you, or any of your men, touched these 'girls' in a way that might upset me?" He doesn't answer me. He just looks away, fear in his eyes. "Captain?"

"He might know more. Let me handle him. You scout the place out. I'm sure you can handle any bandits still hanging around." I snort. I've taken out all of them so far. "And seeing as this is your camp, anything you find is yours. This isn't part of our mission after all."

"WHAT!? So you killed my men for what!? FUN!?"

"No. There was still the off chance you had the ledger we're looking for. But really, I already knew you didn't. I just happened to know she'd be really happy to take out a bunch of punks like you. Thanks for helping me score some points with her, by the way." I snort, amused with his words. He's right though. I don't hate him as much right now. Maybe it's the adrenaline? The endorphins? I don't care. I feel better. And depending on just how much cash and/or weapons I find here, I might actually not hate him for a while. It all depends though.

8-8

It takes me about an hour to check every nook and cranny of the camp. I find nearly thirty girls ranging in age from five to thirty. I have them line up outside, but I make sure they're all warm and comfortable. I pile up the futons next to them, but I keep the weapons some distance away from them. The drugs… I leave that where it is. I have no use for whatever drug these people were interested in. And the money? Hmm. I definitely don't hate Ecchi-san as much now. One-point-two million Ryou. Sure, it was hidden in a secret safe under the floor in the head moron's office, in the basement. But that's okay. That kind of money is worth the effort. I've already sealed it in my scroll – I don't care if I have to give up my lipstick for it! Heck, I don't even mind having to have asked Ecchi-san for help getting it open!

Still. Whatever. Focus. Sixty swords – mostly wakizashis, but some katanas as well. "Yo, Captain. I kind of need a hand? I want to seal these weapons. They might fetch a decent price."

"I thought you'd never ask." He eye-smiles at me. I roll my eyes. I know he's manipulating me. But, come on! One-point-two-million Ryou! Worth being manipulated over. "Hmm, do you care if they're organized?"

"Nope." I smile at him. Today's a good day.

"Alright!" He takes out a scroll, and about sixty poofs later, all the weapons are sealed. I smile when he hands me the scroll. "You can keep the scroll too. I make my own seals, so it's barely worth the effort."

I take the scroll… handling it gently. "Th-thanks." Why do I suddenly feel so… small?

"For what? You've more than earned it. After all, I don't doubt I'll have to step in to help the guys later." He teases.

I shake my head. "Not that. I… needed this."

"Hmm?"

"… never mind." I turn away from him. Literally turn away from him. "Ladies. Is there somewhere we can take you that you'll be safe?"

None of them answer me. They look away, trying to hide that they're crying.

"These men… did they take you from your families?" I ask, trying to understand the situation. One girl, about fifteen, tells me that he boyfriend sold her to these men. Another says that her family was killed right in front of her. Yet another says she wouldn't even know where to go. All in all, no they have nowhere to go.

"Can we take them back with us?" I ask him.

"That's your call to make. What do you want to do?" He asks me right back.

"They can't stay here. They have nowhere to go. Ladies, would you like to come with us then?"

"Where?" The eldest asks.

"I can't tell you that, for now. All I can tell you is that my team and I will get you there safely, and I will make sure you are all taken care of once we get there."

8-8

End chapter 18

8-8

A/N: I'm not going to update for a while again. I need to focus on Broken. I'm wondering if in the meantime you guys will let me know just how much violence is acceptable for your expectations of 'T rating'? Because the whole point of this story is to keep it within the 'T rating', while I explore the more dark and gritty details of the Narutoverse in Broken. I can be no holds barred there, but... how far is okay? And no, leaving bandits like this alive is definitely not 'okay'. If you guys like this way of handling it, I'll stick to this; meaning that if it comes down to blood and gore I either gloss it over like the first few times (just that the head comes off, or they go down in a spray of blood). This story isn't really focused on that kind of thing anyway, but I just want to make sure I'm not overstepping any boundaries?

Anyhoo, let me know! If you guys don't mind the violence, but just don't want the gritty details of it, that's fine too. ^_^