Crazy trouble with love part 4

Alucard and Integra

Series: Hellsing

xxxxxxxxxxxx

Jan Valentine laughed as he felt his arm get torn off his body with blood spurting out, but he didn't care and ran towards a set of double wooden doors up ahead where his targets were. "I'm going to fucking love killing the fucking bastards!" He laughed before smashing through the doors. "Here's Jan!"

That's when all the men there, plus Integra, raised all their guns up to the vampire.

"...well that's not fair." spoke the vampire out.

"I'm sorry, we don't give a fuck." smirked Integra.

"Well you'll sure give a fuck after this!" he roared running in and jumped up onto the table and ran across the table at Integra who tried shooting at him, but the bullets hit his body as he swung his hand across where her throat was, causing a large gash to be made with blood spurting out.

She gargled as she started to choke while screaming in pain.

"Oh that's fucking music to my ears ya bitch!" Jan laughed while looking around. "So who's fucking next?"

"T-T-Take this!" called one of the men as all of them started shooting at the vampire, making him stumble back with each shot before he got off the table and was still standing, but wounded while they stopped at seeing a figure moving towards the vampire from behind.

"What? Are you bastards fucking pussies now?" Jan mocked. "Because if you are then I'm going to enjoy fucking you up like pigs!"

"You bared your fangs on the wrong person." spoke a voice behind him before a gloved hand pierced through his chest from behind.

G-Gah!" He choked out before getting ripped apart as the figure started to use his shadows to consume his body whole.

The old men stared with horror while Alucard's eyes looked over and widened at seeing Integra in her chair grabbing at her bleeding neck.

"I see." He said while moving over to her. "That intruder managed to cut your throat."

"Alu….ca….rd…" she gasped out while trying to stop the blood flow while he moved closer to her.

"It seems I failed on keeping you safe from a mere dog like him. But I can still save you in another way. You need only give me permission master." he spoke while making her face him gently with his cleaned gloved hand.

She gargled while feeling the life slipping from her with every breath. "Alu...card….I com...mand you...to...do it…"

He smirked while opening his mouth. "As you command master."

She saw his sharp canines and felt a brief sense of pain before closing her eyes and passing out.

(Later)

"Wake up." Seras said while sitting next to Integra. "Wake up miss Integra."

Said woman groaned with her eyes twitching before opening. "What happened?"

"Don't you remember? Master saved you after that intruder slashed your throat." She said. "So this might be awkward but, um, welcome to vampirism comrade."

Integra's eyes widened before reaching to her neck where the bandages were. "You mean...he…"

"Turned you into a vampire." She said. "Unfortunately yes and he told me since I was the first 'fledgling' he had in a long while, I'm kind of...outranking you in terms of experience." she saw Integra giving her a cold look and held her hands up. "But you're still in charge of course! That won't change." she chuckled nervously.

She groaned while touching her neck. 'How ironic, a Hellsing becomes a vampire. Really ironic.'

"Feeling hungry?" She asked nervously. "Because if you are I might get some blood from the blood bank." 'Ugh blood...why blood?'

"I'll be getting that police girl." Spoke Alucard from behind Seras. "You just keep the new fledgling guarded well."

"Alucard." spoke Integra looking at her servant.

"Don't you mean master?" He smirked. "After all, you are the newest vampire after police girl."

"And apparently you forgot I was still YOUR master before that happened." she replied while Walter walked in with a small bag of blood.

"I take it miss Integra is getting accustomed to her new life." He said to Alucard.

"Yes, but she still assumes that she's my master, even though she's a fledgling now."

"Well perhaps we can figure out the order after she's regained her strength." he replied while holding the blood out to her. "I secured some fresh blood to help you get accustomed to the taste sooner rather than later."

"...no."

"Pardon me?"

"I'm not going to start drinking blood." She frowned. "Not until Alucard here refers to me as master."

"Then you can starve because I'm not going to fledgling."

She scowled and threw the blankets off and stood up while feeling better already and walked over to her clothes at the desk. "Leave me be until I'm dressed."

Seras nodded before leaving along with Walker as Alucard remained.

She scowled at him while getting her clothes on. 'Damn him, the day I call him fledgeling is the day the devil himself rises from hell.'

'I heard that fledgling.'

Her eyes widened before staying cool and slipped the suit on. 'Good, it saves me the time to tell it to your face then.'

'Is that anyway to talk to your master?' He said in her head.

'You are NOT my master. I'm still head of this organization, and that hasn't changed a bit.'

'Then why are you thinking of calling me master?' He smirked. 'And my you have a lot of smut for one with a dignified air. Like this one involving a wooden horse or this one with the whips-'

"SHUT IT!" she yelled with a blush at the vampire. "Just how far can you even see in my mind?!"

"Let's see. About everything." He grinned. "Including that one time as a child where you dressed up like a ballerina and sung Twinkle Twinkle Little Star while no one was looking before you ripped your dress and bloomers. The yellow ones."

She growled and pulled her sword out and held the tip to his neck. "Breath one word of that to anyone, ANYONE, and I'll make sure you won't be speaking a word for the next century."

He frowned as Integra started to feel weak. "Oh? Are you sure about that fledgling. Because I could instead rip your tongue out instead."

She kept up her expression while her knees buckled slightly. 'Damn it, I over did it already.' she put her sword away and walked past Alucard. "Like I said, the devil himself."

"I met him once." He said calmly. "And he dressed in black and tried calling me a pansy."

"..."

"It was a joke." He rolled his eyes before disappearing into the shadows. 'Really you need to lighten up fledgling.'

"Don't call me that." she growled under her breath.

'Heard that.'

'I'm going to dread this.'

'You'll live, or in this case, die.'

She groaned at that.

(Later)

"Miss Integra." Spoke Seras to her commanding officer/fledgling in training. "Aren't you getting a little stubborn not drinking blood?"

"Well what's your excuse?" she asked while smoking one of her cigars.

"Um….humanity?"

She blew a smoke ring in the air. "Not a good excuse."

"And yours is any better? Just call master, master and just drink the blood already."

"Alright, I'll do that." she smirked and looked Seras in the eye. "But on the day you go and flash your whole body to every person on this planet."

She blushed red. "W-What?! But that's impossible!"

'And perfect for you police girl.'

"M-Master!" blushed Seras while Integra resumed taking a puff from her cigar.

'Fledgling, I suggest you drink some blood or you might go mad, well madder than usual.'

She frowned at that. "Not going to happen."

'Then I have one thing to say.' He said in her mind. 'Police girl, did you know the new fledgling likes streaking when no one's around.'

Seras blushed with wide eyes before Integra stood up and pulled her gun out on Alucard.

"Come on, shoot me." He said while looking Integra dead in the eye. "Shoot your master and drink my blood, or are you a coward?"

Integra scowled before pulling the hammer back and aimed at his head. "Tell me, how long does it take for your whole head to regenerate before you can talk again?"

He frowned before disappearing into the shadows. 'You win this battle, but the war will rage on my fledgling.'

'And I'll be on top Alucard.'

'Oh so you want THAT. I can oblige if you want fledgling.'

'STOW IT!' she thought with another blush while taking another puff from her cigar before crushing it and blew the smoke out through her scowl.

"Miss Integra, is that tr-"

"Not one word."

She nodded in fear.

(Later)

Integra lunged at a target dummy and cut it down the middle with her blade while there was a cut in the ground beneath it. She then noticed that her sword broke...again. 'Damn it, this new strength is really making a dent in my wallet. Maybe I should ask Walter to make a stronger blade?'

"Miss Integra, I've come here with something I believe you can find much use from." spoke said butler walking into the hall with a case.

"And what pray tell is it?"

He walked towards a table before opening the case revealing a rapier with a longer hilt and blade but with a shaper point and the words Ave Maria on the hilt. "This particular blade is made from the same material as the Jackal but with a twist, the tip comes from the same blade used by your ancestor's surgeons blade laced with holy water from the Vatican."

"Oh really?" She said raising her eyebrow.

"Indeed miss Integra." Walter said as Integra took the blade.

She looked it over and eyed another dummy before running at it and sliced it in half. Along with half the wall. She saw it was still in one piece and nodded. "Good, maybe this one will stick around for a long time."

"I hope so miss Integra." He said. "But it has one flaw, it can't pierce solid steel like the Jackal or the Casull."

"Well if I need to get through the stuff then I'll have to use my bare hands."

'Oh? So you're going to act like a vampire now. How quaint fledgling.' Spoke Alucard in Integra's head. 'Now if only you drank blood and call me master.'

'This blade has holy water, do you really want to push me and have me shove it where the sun doesn't shine servant?'

'Mmm maybe, but maybe later. I have an errand for you. Go to the nearest shop and buy a fancy dress, like the one your mother wore on your sixth birthday.'

'When you call me master I'll do it, but if you want to keep disrespecting me, then get it yourself.'

'Fine, maestru.'

'Good.' she ssmirked. 'But why should I get a dress? I have several already.'

'Because I have a surprise for you and since I said maestru, you have to drink blood from now on.' He chuckled darkly.

'That's something entirely different.' she dismissed while leaving the training room.

'Oh and remember. Make sure it's blood red.' He said before leaving her mind.

'Cocky vampire.'

'Heard that.'

(Later)

Integra laid the dress on the bed and had to wait for Alucard to show up and explain. And she has to admit, the long Victorian dress with black frills and a corset kind of made her think her butt might be big if she wore it elsewhere, but Alucard did suggest it, possibly reminiscing of his glory days in the eighteen hundreds.

"If this is some trick I swear I'm gonna-"

'It's time.' Alucard said in her mind. 'Are you dressed or are you planning on coming in your undergarments?'

'I'll get dressed when you tell me what you're planning.'

'I told you it's a surprise. And trust me, you're going to enjoy it.' He grinned. 'And even the police girl is joining as part of the band.'

'What band?'

'Oh just a few Romanian and Turkish musicians I consumed playing a tune for tonight, police girl is the lead singer.' He said. 'Now come along or I'll drag you by the hair.'

Integra frowned before she started changing. 'Damn vampire.'

'I know.'

(One changing later)

'Just head to the ballroom and the surprise will be revealed to you.'

Integra rolled her eyes while walking there in high heels that worked with the dress. And inside was an odd spectacle full of all her employees and some of...Alucard's victims intermingling as Sera's, who was in a harem girl's outfit, was singing to them as a strange mixture of intercultural music was played. 'What the bloody hell is this?'

'A party.' Alucard said while walking up to her in his Zero form. "A party for your vampirism that is."

"Oh? And care to explain why she looks ready to pass out?" she pointed to Seras who was blushing as she sang.

"Oh that, I just convinced her to sing." He said. "She's a little stage fright apparently."

"And the outfit?"

"Part of the deal with those blasted Turks, won't play unless someone dressed up like that, and since I have a undying hatred for them, police girl desired to 'help out'."

She sighed. "Alright so what? Did you want some chance to ogle me without me having a weapon or what?"

He looked at her with a soft expression. "No, I just wanted to give you an air of 'un-normalcy' without the violence this evening."

She blinked at this in confusion. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me." He said before taking a bow. "Care to dance with me maestru?"

She looked at him seriously while glancing around at the atmosphere and sighed. "Fine, but one wrong word or step and I won't miss my target."

"As you wish." He smiled before they started to waltz in perfect sync. "You know I was right."

"About what?"

"Thinking red looked wonderful on you."

She rolled her eyes at that. "You're just saying that because you like blood."

"Really? Or maybe I speak the truth." he smiled while dipping her. "You know, that corset is showing your feminine side quite well, I dare say it makes you less of a Hellsing and more of a Harker."

Integra looked at him in shock before he pulled her back up and wrapped an arm around her waist. 'He never brings her up, ever.'

Alucard continued to dance while Integra was even more confused at his lax nature. "Enjoying yourself?"

"To an extent, yeah."

"Then that makes even for of an occasion, maestu." He said while twirling her around a little. "I haven't danced like this since before you were born."

"Well I've taken enough classes to equal world class ballerinas." she remarked while he lead her. "But I'd rather burn alive then be caught dead in a tutu."

"Though you would like fine in anything." He remarked. "But that's just me talking."

"Well you at least made sure to clean up before this, I'm impressed."

"Thank you." He said before tipping her to the side. "My lady."

She smiled while enjoying herself a little. 'Who knew I'd be dancing with my servant like this?' She then noticed that everyone was gone sans Seras who was still singing like she was in a trance now.

"Integra." He said with a serious tone. "I have to confess, this isn't your vampirism party, but something more."

"And that would be what?" she asked frowning at being tricked.

"It's a, in the words of police girl, date." He said seriously.

"...excuse me?"

"You heard me Integra. This whole party is my way of courting you. Or dating in this era."

She blinked before glaring at the vampire. "And just WHY didn't you ask me in person?"

"You would have stabbed me, blasted me, or just ignored it for something mocking." He listed off. "Which might be the case, but I'm not one to mock on subjects such as this."

"I might not be the nicest leader around, but even I wouldn't attack you for asking. The last part though, you're not far off."

"Glad to know I left a good impression on you Integra." He chuckled. "But as for courting, are you displeased at my manipulation?"

"Yes." she replied with a straight face. "In fact it's actually putting me in the mood to get my sword. But…"

"Yes?"

"The idea of starting a relationship with someone in the organization would be less hard than outside, so...I suppose giving this a try for some time couldn't hurt, just don't go getting any ideas."

Alucard smirked. "I wouldn't dream of it, but it's customary to have a drink so shall I get you some?"

"I suppose one won't hurt."

He nodded before walking off and grabbed some punch before returning to Integra and handing one to her. "For you my lady."

She took the glass and sipped a little before glancing at Seras. "Just how long can she sing? I didn't even know she had a talent in it."

"Oh well I taught her myself." He waved off. "But she can go on and on for days thanks to her vampiric lungs."

Integra sighed at that before finishing the punch. "It tastes kind of sweet, what's in this Alucard?"

"Human blood, fresh from a hospital. O positive if I remember correctly."

Her eyes widened before she tossed her glass aside and grabbed his throat with a scowl of rage. "What the bloody hell did you say?!"

"Human O positive blood." He smirked. "And no I didn't kill the guy, he was already dead when I found him." 'Stupid sparkling vampire wannabe.'

"You bastard! You tricked me into drinking that stuff!"

"But you liked it so I win this battle, Integra." He grinned before returning to his sealed form and slipped away leaving the pissed off woman and the now tired Seras.

"Huh?" Seras looked down and let out a scream before trying to cover herself. "What happened to my clothes?!"

"Blame the bloody bastard." Integra growled. 'I'll ram my blade into master's asshole so...wait WHY did I just say master?!'

'Ha! I won the war fledgling!'

'Jump off your own ass and die!' she yelled before turning and marching off out of the hall.

"Um, just where are my clothes?!"

(Later)

Integra was working on paperwork while smoking yet again. As she smoked she noticed that she was hearing very odd things, like a bee buzzing to Alucard's snoring. And it was getting on her nerves. 'Wonder if I can have Walter make some extra strong earplugs.'

As she looked at her papers, she began to grab her pen but found she went through it. She blinked and tried grabbing it, but it happened again with her hand looking like it was mist for a brief second. 'What the bloody hell?!'

'Knock it off, I'm trying to sleep.'

'First off, you can sleep whenever you want during the day time! Second, what the hell is going on now?'

'What is….oh. That's simple, you're gaining some vampiric traits, not as powerful as my own, but very unique ones.'

'What kind? I don't remember ever hearing or seeing you use mist or whatever you'd call this.'

'I used it when I was still in Transylvania, to monitor Jonathan Harker as he visited my realm. It's a rare trait along with turning into wolves, rats, insects, and other assorted things.'

'So essentially I'm going to become mist?'

'Yes, but you can will yourself solid. And you can turn into bats since I heard your thoughts about my snoring.' He said the last part with annoyance.

'Oh joy.' she rolled her eyes. 'Here's a tidbit, wanna keep from waking up? Then quit reading my thoughts!'

'Nah, it's good for entertainment. Plus I like the dream version of me making out with you in a coffin. Really kinky.' He smirked while Integra blushed red.

'STOW IT AND GO TO SLEEP!'

'Oh I will, princess.' He teased before sleeping again.

She growled while breaking another cigar in her grip. 'He's really pissing me off!' She then noticed that a bat flew out of her sleeve.

"Sqee."

She rubbed the bridge of her nose. 'I'm getting too old for this crap.'

'Your eternal now.'

'Just go to bloody bed!'

(Much later)

Integra puffed some smoke out while looking at the nazi vampires surrounding her as she moved out of the damaged car. 'Just bloody perfect. Just bloody perfect!'

"Surrender and come with us or else." ordered the leader as the others held their guns at the ready.

"Like hell I would you bloody freaks." She said in defiance.

The leader frowned before signaling the men to open fire on the woman.

"I wouldn't do that if you wanna live past this point."

"Fire!"

BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG!

Bullets rained at the woman before the leader signaled them to stop. That was when their eyes widened as this woman had holes, but they looked like they went through her and looked like the London mist.

"I warned you." she smirked while the holes sealed up and she puffed some smoke out before holding her arm out which started to wriggle before small forms started forming.

"Sqeeee!" Went several bats before they shot out and attacked the nazi's as they bit down on each and started to suck them dry of blood.

"AHH!"

"GET IT OFF ME!"

"GAH!"

Integra smirked as the bodies started to fall to the ground, drained of their life blood and given the appearance of a mummy. The bats came back and reformed into her arm while she hummed feeling the nutrients. 'I think I'm starting to get use to these little guys.'

She then heard the sound of a familiar girl fighting like an animal in the Hellsing manor along with something else, something dog like. 'Well looks like I'll be really stretching my legs tonight.' She then turned into mist as she moved into the manor.

(With Seras)

Seras glared at the shirtless male who looked at her with an impassive expression. 'I'm going to rip him apart.'

'Calm down.' Pip said. 'Just calm down and focus, he might be stronger than that woman.'

'Well this is my first time fighting a damn werewolf, cut me some slack.'

'That was the point. And look out!' He yelled out as the man started to charge at her.

Seras jumped as the man's arm broke through the wall easily, but that's when he saw a bat fly out and start biting into his nose.

"I see you were forced to drink human blood." Integra said while reforming into the room.

"Miss Integra." she spoke in surprise. "I didn't expect you to come help me."

"Same, but it might look bad if I didn't help my subordinate." She said while raising her sword up.

The man yanked the bat off and glared at them before turning into his werewolf form and lunged at them.

Integra sent more bats at the werewolf to distract him as Seras started to punch and kick at the nazi. They bit into him with him knocking Integra away into another wall. She groaned while getting up and turned her sword arm into mist before sending it right at him while slashing deep gouges into his face.

He let out a loud roar before Seras used her darkness arm to cut into his side before his lower half slammed her into the ground while trying to bite into Integra.

"Nice try." She said while her body turned mist like and moved out of the mawl and kicked him in the jaw. "But you can't touch me."

'Hey Seras, I think you should find some silver and fast.'

'But where?'

'Um…..maybe someone's tooth?' Pip suggested.

'That's not helpful!'

"Police girl! Quit standing around!" Integra called out while sending more bats at the werewolf.

"Right!" She said before seeing a person's silver filled tooth in the werewolf's coat. She ran at it and grabbed it before throwing in into the werewolf's jaw.

He spotted it and quickly dodged while Integra caught it.

'Let's try this.' her leg twitched before forming several bats while having one of them hold it in it's teeth as they flew at the wolf.

The werewolf started to swat the bat but it was to fast and as the bats started to bite his tail hard, the one with the tooth threw it into his mouth as he howled in pain.

"Have a treat ya bloody mutt!" yelled Sera swinging up and slamming her fist against his vulnerable stomach.

The werewolf groaned and started to feel the silver affecting his body before seeing his body decomposing. But before he could die, Integra decided to try something and used her bats to suck all his blood dry before nothing was left but a silver tooth.

"I think we can safely say werewolves are completely extinct now." remarked Integra putting her sword away while the bats came back and she felt the blood get absorbed.

"Um, what did you do exactly miss Integra?" Seras asked.

"Since Alucard could make familiars by sucking their blood, I figured why not try with my bats."

"So wait...you made that nazi werewolf your familiar?"

"Well not quite. My bats can suck blood and bring it to me, which I use like any vampire, but that doesn't mean the person becomes my familiar. Now if I sucked their blood up with my fangs, then they would."

'Damn, that would have been something.' Pip sighed. 'But hey we're alive that's good.'

"Now come on police girl, we've still got a dozen more of those bastards to deal with." spoke Integra.

"Yes miss Integra." She said while walking out of the manor.

(Later, Thirty years later)

We find Integra sitting at her desk while looking over some reports as she formed a bat from her shoulder and petted it. She was still the same, another good aspect of being a vampire, and was thinking on how long it's been since Alucard vanished. Especially that one night, and that one dance that made her both consider a relationship with the vampire and shoving a stake up his ass at the same time.

"I swear Arthur if I ever see that man again I might punch him or hug him, maybe both." She said while taking a heavy sigh.

"Sqee." It said while closing its eyes and slightly moaned feeling the hand on its head.

'I really do miss him, even if he drives me crazy. Although, being turned into a vampire is a lot better than I imagined. Hopefully my father isn't rolling in his ground.'

The bat nodded before Integra sensed something behind her as a pair of hands wrapped around her neck. "Sqee!"

"Gah!" her eyes widened before kicking on her desk back and swung her foot up and hit against the person's face.

"I see you have a better hang of your powers, maestru." Spoke the person while not flinching from the kick.

She stood up and turned at the person with a frown. "Is that how you say hi after all these years?"

"Well, I could have looked into your mind but I figured I test how much your powers have developed without my supervision." Alucard smirked. "And it looks like you have."

She growled and walked over before slapping him. "That's for scaring the hell out of me!"

He looked at the spot before chuckling. "You got me there Integra."

"And this," she sighed and hugged him. "Is because I did miss you."

"I see." He said before returning the hug. "So you did have a faint heart in that unholy body of yours."

"Oh shut it." she glared without breaking the hug. "You know, considering how long it took you, I think I'm gonna make it clear the pecking order here again."

"I already know." He said. "First is me, then Seras, then you. But," he smirked. "That might change later."

"No, it'll change now." she spoke pointing at the desk. "Get undressed and get on there, we're settling this for good."

Alucard smirked while getting undressed.

(Later)

"Master you're back!" smiled Seras seeing Alucard and Integra walk out of the office looking a little disheveled.

"I am Seras." He said with a grin. "And you can call me Alucard now, you're your own vampire now."

"R-Really?" she asked with wide eyes. "Thank you ma-I mean, Alucard."

"And I have a surprise for you." He smirked. "Integra here is now going to be my new countess."

"...huh?!"

'And I got her to call me master just a few times in the last hour.' he said in the head with a chuckle.

She blushed before asking. "So….um, how was it?"

"Police girl go run a hundred laps around the mansion." spoke Integra with her usual expression. "And not a single word about what you heard, or else."

"Yes miss Integra!" She said while running out of the hall.

'I'll tell you later Seras.' Alucard thought in her head.

"I'm getting really too old for this." groaned Integra rubbing her nose.

"Even if you are just as captivating as we first met years ago, my countess." He said before kissing her cheek.

She blushed before making him turn his head and pressed their lips together. 'If you're gonna kiss me at least do it like this.'

'As you wish, countess Integra Tepes.' He thought as they kissed even more.