Bella

"Something you'd like to share ladies?"Gwendolyn asked. Her voice was high pitched and reminded me of Mrs. Goode the first Physics teacher I'd had after I was changed. It sounded like nails on a chalkboard. "She could be the Goode Witch's doppelganger," I murmured to Rose and Alice. "Nothing at all," I replied quietly. Emmett laughed. Gwendolyn's eyes zeroed in on his hand, specifically the one holding Rose's. They narrowed quickly. I fought back a laugh. At least we weren't the technical definition of incest like some people in this town. "I took a little tour earlier. You all seem to have a lot of electronics."

"We're teenagers, its normal, "Rose murmured just loud enough for the humans to catch. Carlisle's mouth turned up on one side. By now, I the youngest was over forty in vampire years. We of course still resembled teenagers though.

"I hear you and Jasper like to read Bella. What's your favorite book?"Gwendolyn smirked disbelieving at the thought of a real live reading teenager. Though technically I wasn't alive anymore.

"Wuthering Heights. I'm partial to Fitzgerald though."

"I enjoy The Raven very much though Faulkner is my favorite author," Jasper replied ever the Southerner.

"I enjoy the occasional poem by Dylan Thomas," Rosalie chimed in.

"My all time favorite is Tennyson," Edward said.

"If I had to pick it would be Neruda," Emmett added fondly.

"I love Phyllis Wheatley,"Alice chimed in.

Gwendolyn's mouth hung open. I'm just guessing that she figured we'd be airheads.

"Alice what time do we leave?" I asked. Alice wanted to go to the beach tomorrow. Years ago Esme, Alice, and I had found a secluded beach near the mountain regions while we were out hunting. We went up whenever any of us felt like a swim. We'd decided to take this trip weeks ago long before Emmett had the idea to sign us up for Wife Swap.

"Early. So we should turn in before midnight."Alice smiled.

"What are you two talking about?"Gwendolyn asked ogling Carlisle out of the corner of her eye.

"We're going to the beach tomorrow."Rosalie said. "Bella asked when we planned on leaving." "May I be excused?"Rose asked.

"No you may not."Gwendolyn tried and failed to sound stern. Surprisingly Rose stayed. Emmett's eyebrow rose. Rosalie smirked.

"Se viste como, como una maestra de escuela." She dresses like, like a schoolmarm, Rose had said in Spanish.

"No, ella se viste como Kim Kardashian en la grieta."No, she dresses like Kim Kardashian on crack, I rebutted. I hadn't seen clothes this terrible since the designers of the world went on strike for three months because they felt underappreciated. Alice had almost slipped into catatonia. Jasper laughed.

"No, ella se viste como Kim Kardashian en la grieta de una maestra de escuela jugando." No,she dresses like Kim Kardashian on crack playing a schoolmarm, Alice chimed in. Rose and I nodded at Alice's assessment. Carlisle gave us a withering look.

"Actually, Alice I think we should reschedule the beach," I said in response to Carlisle's caution. I lifted my shield and Edward grinned, squeezing my hand. Alice nodded smiling. "You're right Bells she needs our help." Rose applauded quietly snickering. "I've never been prouder," Alice murmured hugging me.

"I have my moments," I laughed.