Love of the Ocean

This chapter has Connie in it, and like I've said before I refuse to make her OOC.

Anyway, how will Steven deal with two girls he loves? Are the Crystal Gems going to find about his love for Lapis? Eh, I don't know. I just write this stuff.

Chapter 5 – Long Shadows

When we got back to the Beach House, I was surprised to see Connie sitting on the steps waiting for me. She looked up when she heard us approach and her face lit up. I felt Lapis stop beside me and I stopped as well as Connie got up and ran over to us.

"Steven! There you are!" Connie greeted, "The Gems said you had gone out for a while." She smiled when she saw Lapis. "Lapis! You're awake! I'm so glad!"

"Thank you," Lapis replied in a quiet voice. I could feel a wave of tension coming from her, and it took me a moment to figure out why. Connie didn't seem to notice, though.

"Sorry I didn't call you," I said to her, "It sort of slipped my mind."

"That's all right," Connie dismissed, "I was hoping, if it's all right with you, if you could help me finish my project. We took so many pictures yesterday, and I wanted your help sorting through them all."

I grinned. "I'd love to help!" I replied. I was about to run off, but I quickly caught myself and looked up at Lapis. She was staring down at me with wide eyes, but gave me a tiny nod. I felt relief swell inside me. She was ok.

I ran with Connie back to my house, glancing back briefly to see Lapis slowly following us. When we got inside, Amethyst was eating stuff from the fridge, but other than that the house was empty. We sat down at the table and Connie took out her camera and a binder filled with pictures.

"I went a little overboard with the pictures," Connie admitted sheepishly.

"That's ok," I told her, "That just means we have more fun to sort through!"

Connie giggled as she opened the binder and started flipping through it. We were about to start sort through them, when I heard the front door open, and I saw Lapis walk in. I watched out of the corner of my eye as she silently walked past us up the stairs to my bed.

I turned to Connie. "Um, can you excuse me for just a moment?" I requested, "I just want to make sure Lapis is ok."

"Of course," Connie replied as she flipped through her binder.

I nodded gratefully and quickly raced up the stairs to where my "room" was. Lapis was sitting quietly on the corner of my bed, staring out the window. I sat down next to her and put a hand on her arm.

"Hey, are you ok?" I asked her quietly.

"I'm fine," she replied, not looking at me. I looked over to where Connie was waiting for me at the table, then looked back at Lapis.

"Are you… jealous of Connie?" I wondered.

Lapis let out a long sigh. "I really can't hide anything from you, can I?" she said, a small spark of humor in her voice, "Yeah, I guess I am a little jealous of her. And I hate that I am. She's a very nice girl, thinking of others, and wanting to include me in your activities. I can see why you like her so much."

I felt myself blush. Were my feelings for Connie that obvious? I briefly wondered if Connie could tell as well. Then, with a panicked thought, I wondered if she and the Gems could tell my feelings for Lapis. I shook the thoughts from my mind.

"Please don't be jealous of her, Lapis," I said, "I love you, and Connie is one of my best friends. I would really like it if you could try to get along with her."

Lapis smiled gently at me and leaned over and rested her cheek on the top of my head. "I'll try for you, Steven," she replied.

I smiled and hugged her. "Thanks, Lapis," I said. I stood up, gave her a quick kiss on the cheek, then walked back down stairs to rejoin Connie.

"Sorry about that," I apologized as I sat down.

"That's all right," Connie replied kindly, giving me a warm smile, "Is Lapis ok?"

I looked up to where Lapis was still staring out the window. Then I looked back at Connie. "I think she will be," I answered.

…

As I slept that night, wrapped in Lapis' arms, I couldn't help but feel worried. About what, I had very little doubt. I had conflicting feelings. Strong conflicting feelings. I was in love with Lapis. But I was also in love with Connie. How could I ever pick between them? I could never choose one over the other. And I felt that by showing love for one I was betraying the other. I sighed heavily, unsure of what to do.

"Steven," someone whispered suddenly, and I startled. I looked at Lapis and saw that she was asleep. Then I looked beside me and saw Garnet crouching by my bed, staring at me.

"Garnet!" I gasped as quietly as I could, "You scared me!"

"Sorry," she said, "I woke you because I could tell you needed some advice."

I was about to ask how she knew that, when I remembered. Future vision. "I guess I could use some advice," I whispered. As gently as I could, I wormed my way out of Lapis' arms, careful not to wake her. Then I followed Garnet downstairs and sat next to her on the couch.

"I'm not really sure how to say this," I sighed.

"You're in love with Lapis Lazuli," Garnet said for me, "And you're in love with your friend Connie."

I knew Garnet already knew my feelings, but somehow I was still a little surprised. "Future vision?" I asked.

"That," Garnet replied, "And I saw you and Lapis kissing on the beach."

I could feel my face getting warmer as my cheeks turned red. That was supposed to be a private moment! I looked at Garnet and saw her staring at me with an amused grin.

"Do Pearl and Amethyst know?" I wondered, wanting to change the subject a little.

"I'm pretty sure they know about your feelings for Connie," she replied, "Not to be rude, but you two are kind of obvious with how much you like each other."

I felt myself blushing again.

"However, they don't know about your feelings for Lapis," she continued, "I don't think Amethyst really suspects anything, and Pearl just thinks you're looking out for a friend."

There was a great feeling of relief inside me. For now, I didn't really want Pearl and Amethyst to know I was in love with Lapis. I'm not entirely sure why, but I felt it would be better if I told them myself.

"I don't know what to do, Garnet," I sighed, getting back to the problem, "I love them both, but I could never choose one over the other. Lapis already knows how I feel about Connie, and I guess that's fine because I can discuss it with her. But I can't even imagine how Connie would react if I told her about my feelings for Lapis! I can't help but worry that Connie might think that I don't love her, or I'm betraying her or something."

Garnet put a gentle hand on my shoulder. "I know you're frustrated by all of this," she said, calmly, "I know you feel like there's no solution to your problem. And the truth is, there might not be, at least no simple solution. But, remember this, Steven: you're only fourteen. You have your entire life ahead of you. No one, not Lapis, not Connie, would expect you to make such a huge decision at such a young age."

I couldn't help but smile as Garnet continued. "And you know those two. I know they both love you. They will understand anything you tell them. As long as it comes from your heart. And Steven, one last word of advice: NEVER lie to them."

"Thanks, Garnet," I said, hugging her, "You always know what to say." I went back up to my bed and snuggled myself into Lapis' arms again. As I fell back to sleep, I decided to tell Connie about Lapis and me tomorrow. And then I would see what would happen.

…

I felt something inside me as I dreamt that night. Something I had never really felt before. Lust. A powerful, dangerous lust for… something. Everything was dark. I couldn't see anything, I could only feel things. I wanted something, or someone. I realized it was a person that I wanted. Why did I feel this way? I was hunting this person, I wanted to be with them, to keep them away from everyone else. I wanted them to myself. But who was this person? And was I even myself? Could I possibly be in someone else's mind?

An image slowly came into my mind. I felt my heart race. It was Lapis. I was pursuing Lapis. And in an instant, I knew who's mind I was in. The world became clear and I could suddenly see. I could see where she was. And she was dangerously close.

I woke in a panic, panting and sweating. It was Jasper. I had been in the mind of Jasper; she was still out there and she was still hunting Lapis. In fact, if what I saw was true, she was much closer than I thought she would be. Shivering, I pressed myself against Lapis and wrapped my arms tightly around her.

I swore I wouldn't let Jasper hurt her anymore. And I intended to keep that promise.

...

When I woke in the morning, my eyes were still closed, and I felt very tired. But for some reason I could also hear Lapis breathing heavily, and I quickly opened my eyes, expecting to see her staring in terror at Jasper. But when I looked at her, she was staring at me.

"Is there something wrong?" I asked, worriedly.

"Yes," she replied, breathlessly, "You're squeezing all the air out of me."

I blinked at her and suddenly realized just how tightly my arms were around her. Embarrassed, I let go of her with a muttered apology. "I had a really bad dream last night," I told her. She nodded in understanding.

"What was it about?" she wondered.

I was about to lie and make something up, to spare her the horrible truth, but then I remembered Garnet's warning from last night: NEVER lie. I sighed heavily.

"I was in Jasper's mind," I explained. I felt her tense up beside me. "She was hunting you, and lusting after you." I shivered. "I've never felt what lust feels like, but if that's what it's like, I never want to experience it again. But that's not the worst part, Lapis. She was really nearby. She's really close to Beach City, and getting closer."

Lapis stared at me and slowly sat up. I sat up with her, watching her anxiously. I didn't know what to say. I wanted to comfort her, but at the moment, I felt like I shouldn't touch her. She didn't say anything, but stared blankly out into the room. I wondered if she was thinking back to what Jasper had done to her. I didn't want her to think about that, I wanted her to feel safe with me.

I carefully leaned over and gently hugged her, slipping my arms around her waist. She slowly and silently wrapped her arms around me, and I leaned into her, resting my head on her chest. I felt her begin to softly tremble.

"Lapis," I whispered to her, "Please don't think about Jasper. I promise, as long as we're together, she won't be able to hurt you."

She didn't reply, but lowered her head and gently kissed my forehead. "I love you, Steven," she whispered to me.

"I love you, Lapis," I answered, breathing softly as I relished the warmth of her lips on my forehead.

This chapter was actually going to be much longer, but I kept finding perfect spots to end it. So, next chapter I'm going to do something a little different and switch POV's a couple of times to suit my needs. I hope you liked this chapter. I tried to address some concerns I think Steven would have about being in love with two girls. And next chapter he's going to talk to Connie about it. Please leave a review!