Crazy trouble with love part 4
Tayuya and Naruto
Series: Naruto
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-Konoha-
KABOOM!
KABOOM!
It's that time again, the Bon festival, where the ghosts and spirits come back to the world of the living for one day and where families hold memorials for their deceased. And it was also a good place to plan pranks on unsuspecting victims.
"Naruto!" Yelled Iruka while drenched in oil as Naruto laughed on a rooftop.
"Ah ah!" he stuck his tongue out. "Come and catch me Iruka-sensei!"
"Oh I'm going to get you for that!" He yelled while running after him. "Get down here and take your punishment like a shinobi!"
"If you can catch me!" He laughed while turning into his sexy no jutsu girl form. "Ok Iruka-kun~"
His eyes widened and popped a small nosebleed just as Naruto transformed back and rounded the corner quickly. "Naruto!"
He laughed before running down a dark alley as it suddenly got cold for some strange reason.
The camera then moved to show a person with a familiar air to her while looking at the people laughing and having fun on this day of remembrance.
"Stupid shits." scowled the girl who had red hair with a white upside down triangle around her head with a white kimono as she stood to the side. "Trying to have a fun time while breathing all the fucking time, like some of us wish we still could!"
The people smiled while setting off fireworks.
"And what are they doing? Simple, fucking remembering their family." She scowled. "Ha! Like anyone can remember me."
On the rooftop near her Naruto watched the fireworks go off in the sky.
"What a good day." He said before frowning. "Even if I don't have anyone besides the old man to remember."
"Hey fuck heads! If I was still living I'd shove those things up your asses!" she yelled moving around the crowd with ease and flipping them off.
But the crowd didn't see or hear her in the slightest.
"Fucking shits!" She yelled.
"Huh?" Naruto said as he looked down and saw her. "What the?!"
"I swear to god if I didn't die I would go out and slaughter everyone here!" She yelled while flipping the bird at some girls. "Especially you dumb blonds and lazy asses!"
"AAHH! GHOST!" Yelled Naruto in fear.
She turned and blinked before frowning. "Oi shitface, if you're gonna get drunk and shout do it somewhere else."
"I'M NOT DRUNK!" He yelled as the girl floated in front of him. "AHHH!"
"Shut up!" she yelled before blinking. "Wait a sec….you can see me? You can hear me?"
"Clear as day." He gulped before blinking. "Wait you're that girl that tried taking the teme!"
"I have a name you know shit head." She frowned. "And it's Tayuya Uzumaki."
"...NANI?!"
"What!" She yelled while covering her ears.
"I'm an Uzumaki!"
"...you're shitting me right?"
"No, it's my last name. But...wait! How are you here? You died."
She frowned. "Don't remind me. I'm sitting dead, and from timber too! Isn't that fucking great!"
"Um…..no?"
"At least you think so, all the other ghosts laugh at that all the fucking time!"
"Wait, other ghosts? Which ones?"
"My old teammates, a few idiots from the invasion, a old man, and a few that came from my bastard of a leader's early days." 'And I'm still shocked they look...ugh!'
"Did you see the old man?"
"Well yes, and he didn't stop yammering about his grandson and adopted grandson. Always chatting like I'm some kind of parrot." She grumbled before seeing his face. "What? Got something in my eye?"
"Wait, so does that mean he's here?" he asked with hope.
"Yes, but I don't know where the fuck he is." She said. "But that doesn't change the fact why you can fucking see and hear me."
"I don't know, but….I can't believe it." he muttered. 'Uzumaki? If she has the same last name, does that mean we're related?'
Tayuya looked Naruto over and frowned. "If you're an Uzumaki, where's your red hair?"
"Red hair?"
"All Uzumaki's have fucking red hair, it's like a genetic trait." She frowned. "And you're a dumb blond."
He frowned and tried tossing one of the water balloons he had with him at her.
But it went though her. "Yeah, you're dumb as shit."
"I'm not dumb you crazy redhead!" he snapped. "If I'm so dumb, then how come I'm alive and you're not?"
"Don't go comparing my death with stupidity!" She growled. "Especially when you DIDN'T have the balls to tango with me!"
"I tricked you into looking another way!"
"THAT DOESN'T COUNT!"
"Yes it does." he smirked while sticking his tongue out and pulling his eyelid down. "Bleh!"
Tayuya growled before grinning as she slowly morphed her face into a skull with eyes in it. "AOOOO!"
"AAAHHH!" he screamed scrabbling back while holding his chest as her face turned back to normal and she laughed.
"Ha! You're scared shitless!" She laughed. "Oh god you're so easy!"
He glared before getting up. "That wasn't funny!"
"Of course it was, it was fucking hilarious!"
Naruto grumbled before grinning as he did some handsigns and transformed into a naked Tayuya. "Oh I'm Tayuya, and I'm a big chested sailor with a hat. Save me from the evil Shikamaru!"
"KNOCK IT OFF!"
She smirked while turning back. "Not funny when you're being made fun of right?"
She growled before moving over and moved her arms through his head.
"What are you doing?" He asked confused while the seal on his gut glowed very VERY faintly.
'Damn it! I wanted him to freak out and jump back!' She thought while getting her hands out of his head.
"Um question, why join that bastard?"
"Because he found me and took care of me." she replied turning away crossing her arms. "If it wasn't for him I would be dead."
"Really? I thought he tricked you or something."
"No, but he did say he would remember my birthday." She tisked. "Which he NEVER did mind you."
It became silent minus the people celebrating down below while Naruto pondered on what to say.
After a while he finally got the answer.
"Oh...um happy belated birthdays?"
Tayuya blinked at that. "Thanks, I think?"
"Sorry, but even I know how much it stinks when someone doesn't at least acknowledge it." He said with a frown.
"Let me guess, people forget your birthday because of your friend." She pointed to his stomach.
He looked down and nodded before looking at her in the eyes. "Let me guess, he told you about him?"
"No, but I do know when something shitty happens." She sighed. "Plus I studied my family history to know what a tailed beast's prison is."
"..."
"That I know you had whiskers before I died. Even if they look stupid as shit." She said while not knowing her skin and body was becoming more clear and solid.
He growled at her before a thought came to him. "Wait, where'd you find the history? I've tried several times to find something but I couldn't find a page."
"It's in the woods." She said while her body got more and more solid. "In a shrine with many masks, it's not hard to find."
'Then I can find it and learn all I want!' he thought before registering how much less translucent she looked. "Um, is that another ghost trick?"
"What are you talking about?" She asked confused as her body finally became solid. "Huh? What the heck? Why I'm I heavy….oh great! I got fat as a whale!"
"You look fine to me."
She cocked her head before falling on the ground. "Ow! That damn hurt….wait. Hurts?"
"That's it! You look solid." he spoke. "You're not a ghost anymore cause then you wouldn't feel pain."
Tayuya went wide eyed before jumping in the air. "I'm fucking alive! I'm fucking alive!" She then smirked before running to the edge. "Later sucker!"
Naruto ran over and saw her jumping off before hitting the ground, but instead of a bloodlust mess, she was...transparent again and floating above the ground. "What the?"
"Oh you gotta be fucking shitting me!" She roared while sprouting out curses that made Naruto blush.
He covered his ears and saw her float back up and land beside him before she grew solid again.
"Just what the living shitting fuck happened?!" She yelled while grabbing Naruto by the jacket.
"I don't know!" He yelled. "I just don't know!"
She growled while shaking him around. "Talk dammit! I want answers!"
"I keep telling you I don't know!" He yelled. "I just don't know you crazy redhead!"
"I'm not crazy!"
He grabbed her hands and took a chance before headbutting her.
"OW! That hurt!" She yelled while not letting go. "You little fuck!" she then bashed his head.
"Gah!" he hissed while she shook him faster. He crossed his fingers before several clones popped around her and grabbed her before breaking her off him. "Ha! Take that!"
She growled. "Get your hands off me!"
"How about no."
"Oh I'm going to fuck you up!" she growled while squirming in the clone's hold.
Naruto grumbled before seeing the bruise on her head and rubbed it gently. "Sorry about before, but you did shake me."
"Ow! Don't touch it fuck head!"
"Sorry." He said before taking some bandages out of his pocket and wrapped it around her head. 'Man this is one nasty bruise.'
"What the hell are you doing?" She asked in confusion.
"Putting bandages on your head. Isn't it obvious?"
"But why?"
"Because you're hurt and I don't like it when someone's in pain." he replied finishing up. "Plus considering what's going on, maybe fighting isn't the answer."
She grumbled while the clones vanished. "Fine, but I want a flute as payment."
"A flute? Why would you want one of those things?"
"It's for my jutsu's." Tayuya frowned. "Without it I can't use them, that and I need it to pass the time."
"..."
"What? Never saw a musician before?!"
"No no! It's not that, I just didn't expect you needing a flute that's all."
"Well I do." She frowned before hearing music in the distance. "Hey, you hear that?"
"What?"
"The music. Do you hear it?"
"Oh that, yeah so?"
"We're going to get that flute now and fucking join in!"
"Say what?" He said in shock.
"We're going to get a flute for me and join the fuck in." She frowned. "I'm tired of not playing in three years!"
"Well what are you gonna do? Run up and just take it from them?"
Tayuya grinned. "That's the plan." before grabbing him and started running.
(One flute 'buying' later)
Naruto tried to hang on as Tayuya held on tight to a flute made of pure silver while running towards a large stadium full of people with a band playing on stage. "Slow down!"
"Fuck no!" She yelled with a grin as they jumped on stage. "Sorry you shit, but we're taking this shit up to the next level! Blondy take the piano!"
"But I can't play!"
"Just try and keep up!"
(Insert Tayuya-Flute[Nightcore])
Tayuya started to play a tune as Naruto started to play the piano. With said blonde having a tough time keeping up and just hitting keys at random.
But it didn't matter if he was bad or not because the crowd started to clap to the music as some of the ninja noticed her appearance and connected the dots.
"Wait...isn't that…" Neji said turning to Choji.
"That girl who took Sasuke?"
"Yes but why is she here now?" He said while seeing Shikamaru plain shocked. "And why is she letting Naruto play the piano?"
"No clue." He shrugged as he tapped his foot to the beat. "But I kind of like this."
"Shouldn't we be doing something?" asked Kiba.
"After the performance." Shikamaru said. "If we did it now it would cause panic, that and Naruto might get hurt in the crossfire."
"Still I think we should do something."
(End song)
Tayuya smirked while taking a breath. "Ready for another fucking song!"
"I'm not." sweatdropped Naruto.
"Well I'm not blonde." She frowned before turning to the crowd. "This next song is for my fucking pal here who was shitting nice to a ghost like me."
(Insert Longing (Inuyasha OST.))
The area was swept into the music as she played a song even a hardened veteran would find saddening yet full of a small semblance of hope.
"Damn, I didn't see this coming." remarked Shikamaru while Choji sniffled.
"Yeah." Cried Neji. "It's...just brings out all the pain in one move."
"Not to mention making it sound so sad." Kiba sniffled as he saw Hinata crying a river along with Tenten.
(End song)
Tayuya sniffled when she finished the song and sighed before smirking. "Alright you shits, I want some idiots to man the drums and play the vocals. So anyone wants to come up and help the blonde?"
That got the attention of the jounin from that particular mission. 'Hmmm, should I?'
"But I'm tired." Naruto groaned.
"It's the last song you blonde. Just wait ok?" She said to Naruto as Neji and Shikamaru jumped on stage. "Oh it's you two, never mind just get fucking ready."
(Insert Naruto OST 1- Naruto Main Theme)
"Oh and get your mutt friend to playing guitar. We need that." She frowned while making Kiba pissed off.
"Oi! Who you calling mutt?"
"Just get up here!" She yelled as Kiba jumped on stage. "Now get the guitar and start playing on my signal."
He grumbled, but obliged and grabbed the instrument.
"And one, two and a one two three four!" She said before starting to play.
The crowd cheered as the music started to play as some girls started getting pumped to the beat, such as Sakura and Shizune.
Naruto himself was stunned at how crazy this turned out compared to what he figured. 'By kami, this is great! I mean wow the crowd loves it!'
Tayuya herself felt joy hearing her music being positive and making the crowd go wild, even if Naruto was a bad piano player. 'Note to fucking self, teach him how to play a piano.'
Even the others were getting into it, even though they shouldn't.
(End song)
The girl finished her song before giving the crowd the finger as everyone cheered, including Tsunade. "Thank you and fucking good night!"
"Finally." Naruto groaned before slamming his head into the piano as a loud sound rang out and made the crowd cringe. 'I never wanna see this thing again.'
Tayuya frowned before walking towards him and bonked him in the head.
"Ow!"
"Don't just do that! It hurts my fucking ears you dumb blond!"
"Well it hurts when you do that to someone out of nowhere crazy redhead!"
"I'm not crazy!"
"And I'm not dumb!"
They glared at each other before Tayuya smirked.
"You're alright by me. Just don't change."
"Huh?"
She sighed while giving him a noogie. "I'm fucking saying you're an ok person. That's not something I normally say, but since we are Uzumaki and you've been nothing but fucking helpful I'm making you an exception."
"Ah! Do you have to curse?" he winced from the noogie.
"Yes." She chuckled while the jounin started to move closer to her. "Let me guess, interrogation?"
"Easy, or hard way?" asked Shikamaru in his bored tone.
"Just one problem." She said before walking away from Naruto as her skin became transparent while she pushed her hand into his gut. "I'm already dead shit face."
"That explains things, and why her chakra is constantly flickering." spoke Neji.
She frowned at their apparent lack of fear before her skin melted off. "I'm going to fuck you up!"
"AAHH!" Kiba screamed in fear.
"Relax, she can't do anything." spoke Shikamaru who wasn't flinching.
Tayuya glared while returning to normal and gave them the bird as she walked back to Naruto. "Your friends are shit. Fucking shit with no balls."
"Um….that's just them." he sweatdropped. "And how long are you gonna curse?"
"Until I die again." She shrugged before smirking as she gave Naruto a hug. "But who knows, I might fucking curse you blonde."
Naruto blushed since her chest was hitting his face. "W-Wait, what are you gonna do now?"
"Simple." She grinned. "I'm going to haunt you until you die a horrible death."
"Nani?!" He yelled in shock.
"I'm going to fucking haunt you so just shut up, pucker up and act like an Uzumaki." She frowned before giving him a peck on the forehead.
Naruto's face turned red while the others were even more surprised to see that. But the crowd was even more shocked as some wanted more.
"You heard the fucking masses." She grinned while moving his head up. "Time for an encore."
Chu~
'HOLY SHIT!' He thought in shock while feeling his face light up.
She pulled back and smirked as Naruto fainted while giving a middle finger at everyone as the screen went black.