Crazy trouble with love part 4

Madra and Hashirama

Series: Naruto

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-Woods in the Land of Fire-

The camera slowly focused on the ruins of a bygone era as it moved indoors and right towards a scroll labeled Real History of the Uchiha and Senju clans in bold letters. It then zoomed on a certain picture that was illegible except for the clan's symbols as the camera turned off.

(Years before the present)

A young child was tossing stones across a river by himself. They had spiky, black hair that had a slight blue tint to it. Their hair was chin-length that parted to frame the sides of their face. The casual attire consisted of a blue long sleeve shirt and white pants and bandages around the shins. Around their waist they had a white sash that held a sack

Splash.

Splash.

It was starting to get boring as the child tossed more rocks into the river.

'Boring.' they thought. 'If I had someone to hang out with for this, maybe it might be fun. Izuna's busy and everyone else is off preparing for another battle.'

Just then another stone was skipped across the water five times, but it wasn't from the child.

The child turned to see a boy with hair that was more bowl-cut in style, hanging around his face with a dark kimono shirt, a short light green jacket with darker green linings, a white scarf around his neck, traditional pinstriped kimono pants of his clan, and a dark green sash around his waist.

"Hi." he called out.

"What do you want?"

"That's kind of rude you know."

"Well it's a legitimate question." replied the child.

"Still, it's rude to not say hi back."

The child ignored him while looking at the river.

"I'm Hashirama." spoke the boy.

"So?" The child said bluntly.

The boy groaned and skipped a stone. "Hmm, you know if you want, we could make a wager."

"And that would be?"

"If I can skip my stone farther than you, you have to tell me your name."

"And if I happen to lose?"

"I'll leave."

The child looked down at a stone and picked it up. "Alright, deal."

They got ready before throwing their stones, but the problem was they went at the same time and sank the same time as well.

"..."

"..."

"Double or nothing?"

"Fine."

(Fifty attempts later)

Splash!

Splash!

"You're pretty good." remarked Hashirama.

"Same." The child said. "But you're still annoying."

"Well at this rate I guess I won't know your name." he shrugged. "Maybe I can just give you a nickname instead."

"Don-"

"Oh I know! Porcupine!" He grinned before a stone hit his head. "Ow!"

The child glared at him and sighed. "Madra."

"Huh?"

"That's my name."

"...that sounds like a girl's name."

Madra glared at him before turning and walking away.

"Um...I hope to see you again!"

'Like that would happen.'

(Next day)

Madra sighed while laying on a tree. 'That kid was a pain in the butt. And now that he knows my spot I can't go there to relax.'

As the child rested the same boy from before walked by and rested right besides her in a very quiet fashion.

"I hope he doesn't come."

"Who doesn't come?"

The child's eyes widened before jumping away and landed to see the boy there and narrowed their eyes. "You."

He blinked while looking around him. "Really?"

"What are you doing here? I was trying to relax."

"Same here." He said. "Plus this is a nice tree to sleep under."

The child scoffed and walked off.

"Hey wait, where you're going?"

"Away from you."

The boy followed with a frown. "You know you really should try being a little nicer. Especially since this is actually a peaceful moment."

"War is always present, why should I stop and be pleasant when you might get stabbed in the back?"

"Well….that's true, but I'm not really the fighting type." he replied stopping and looking off into the distance. "I'm one of the few who wishes things could just stop."

The child turned to him and kept their expression. "That's something that's easier said than done."

"Yes, but I believe peace can be achieved if we all got along and understand each other."

Madra looked bored at that. "You do that and you might be six feet under."

"You can't tell me you've never thought about what life would be like without war?" he questioned.

"I do but that's just a dream."

"Not unless you don't do something about it." He said with a smile.

Madra looked at Hashirama and sighed. "Then tell me, what do you think would help?"

"If the adults just stop fighting and got together to talk. Maybe work things out that didn't cost so many lives."

"If that was the case, why do you think clans kill each other over such things?"

"...they might have not thought about the overall consequences of the future?" guessed Madra before closing their eyes and walked off. "I have to get home, we can talk later next time."

"Really?"

"Yes you dunce."

Hashirama smiled and waved. "See you around, Madra."

"Later." they waved while disappearing into the woods.

(Sometime later)

After that the two would keep meeting at the river to skip stones while slowly getting use to each other. Even if Hashirama's brooding was annoying and Madra's dislike to him peeing in front of them.

But when Hashirama went home he saw his father and brother, Tobirama Senju, waiting for him with his father looking stern as ever.

"Hello tou-san."

"Tobirama, I've heard from your brother that you've met a boy lately." spoke his father while Tobirama turned to his brother with a frown.

"Tou-san ordered me to tell."

Hashirama sighed since his brother did have the tendency to oblige.

"Hashirama, did this boy have blackish hair with a mysterious aura around him?"

"The hair yes, but not the aura you speak of tou-san."

He crossed his arms. "Hashirama, that boy is an Uchiha."

He went wide eyed. "But he didn't act like one at all."

"That is their way, deceive and gather information for the impending battle."

Hashirama looked down with a frown. 'I knew it. I never said it, but it always felt off. No one else could dress or act like him, even kids from neighboring towns wouldn't act so serious or manage to stick around.'

"I want you to end these meetings."

He looked at his father in shock. "But tou-san, maybe this is good. Maybe we can prove there can be peace. It could help end all this fighting for-"

"Enough!" He interrupted. "The Uchiha are nothing but a pack of animals, they don't even know what peace is, just to kill everything they come across." he turned his back to them. "Stop meeting that boy, because sooner or later, you will have to fight them."

The two brothers saw the patriarch walk out of the room as Hashirama looked at the ground.

'This is bad. I can't do that.'

(A while later)

He walked towards the river bank to look for Madra. But the child wasn't there. "Madra? Where are you?"

"Here." spoke the child jumping down near the shore while holding a stone. "Ready for our tie breaking game?"

He sighed. "Madra, are you really an Uchiha?"

The child was silent and nodded.

"Then you already know who I am, right?"

"Yes, it's obvious as the haircut you have."

Hashirama smiled while seemingly picking up stone. "Then let's have another game and you'll see who comes out on top, Porcupine."

"Yeah that's going to be me acorn face." Madra said while getting ready.

Hashirama tossed his stone just as Madra did and they both caught them, but saw a small message on them.

Run/Get away from here.

They blinked at this but understood the message as they nodded discreetly. They turned and quickly jumped away, but that's when they spotted their fathers and brothers appear on the riverbed across from each other ready for a fight.

Which made them decide either to help or run far away from the battle, but the latter was too strong as they jumped in front of their family.

"Hashirama, if you wish for your actions not to be traitorous to the clan, you know what you must do." spoke Butsuma.

"But tou-san-" he spoke before seeing him glare and looked down while sharing a look with Madra before pulling out a kunai. "Alright."

"Looks like we're enemies." Madra said while pulling out a kunai. "Shame, all that talk of peace lead to nothing after all."

The two sides lunged at each other which lead to yet another pointless battle of nothing.

(A long time later)

We find Madra and Hashirama in a fight with numerous other clan members around a barren field with Madra using a sword against Hashirama's and wearing the standard Uchiha outfit, a black shirt with a high-collar left slightly open and the clan's crest on its back.

The Senji, who wore a standard shinobi dress with dark red armor worn over a simple black suit with sandals. This armor was constructed from numerous metal plates, formed into multiple protective guards along his body; each collar of his shoulder guards bore the Senju symbol. A white-coloured cloth bearing his clan's symbol was on his forehead, used his own sword to counter the blade.

"You've improved, but it's not enough." spoke Madra trying to push harder against him.

"I should say the same thing about you." He said while doing the same. "But I know I'm going to win this fight."

"Provided you can actually kill." Madra pushed him back while letting go of the sword and quickly went through handsigns. "Katon: Great Fireball!"

The Senji quickly dodged the fireball before making some hand signs. "Mokuton Hijutsu: Deep Forest Creation."

Madra quickly jumped away from the roots while seeing Hashirama lunge at him with his sword.

SLISH!

Madra quickly used a kunai to block the blade, but barely.

Hashirama pushed against it as they landed while noticing how Madra's face seemed different for some reason.

It was a little more feminine and less chubby than the last time they met.

"Did you lose weight?" He asked innocently.

Madra's eyes narrowed before quickly kicking Hashirama back in the gut.

He skidded across the ground before seeing the Uchiha about to use another jutsu. "Mokuton: Wood Clone Jutsu."

Madra let loose another fireball that hit the clone of Hashirama and frowned before seeing the Senju men retreat. "I guess the clans decided that it's best to retreat. Pathetic really."

Hashirama appeared behind him and grabbed the Uchiha's waist. He brought a kunai to Madra's neck and frowned. "Care to repeat that?"

"I said it's pathetic." Madra frowned while unflinching. "What ninja retreats from a battle?"

"One that wants to survive." he replied pushing the blade closer to the edge. "I'm serious when I say I don't wanna kill you, but I will if I have to."

"Then do it." Madra said before the Uchiha's voice cracked which sounded like a girls for one second.

'Hmm, what was that?' He thought in confusion. "Um….puberty hit finally?"

BASH!

He reeled back while blood flowed from his nose as Madra got out of his grasp. He saw the Uchiha turn and run off while doing the same and following his clan. 'That's odd, I expected some witty remark.'

(A long time later)

Hashirama sighed as he finally had a break from fighting to check out a town for a bit of gambling, even if he couldn't win for shit. 'Finally, now to get some fun and relaxation.'

He walked towards the red district before seeing a woman in a red kimono walking in as well. He noticed how her hair was a similar color to Madra, but was fashioned into a half bun with the rest of the hair dangling down under it. And unlike the Uchiha, she was more feminine with a large ass and E cup breasts. 'Huh? Wow I'm now thinking of my friend as a woman, what next my brother?'

As he walked in he noticed that the woman was playing card with two other men that looked like bandits. 'Hmm, she does seem quite fetching. I wonder if she might be open to a game after those two.'

"Full house." She said while smirking. "Read it and weep boys."

They groaned before the woman took the pot. "Can't believe we lost to a woman."

She smirked before seeing a familiar face. 'Shit!' "Um I have to leave, more cards to play and pots to take."

"Oh hold on now! We're still eager to get our stuff back."

"And getting my wooden leg back too!"

"I said no." she glared before standing up and moving to leave before seeing Hashirama was in her way. 'Damn it!'

"Hi, I could see you're a poker player." He smiled. "Want to play me?"

"Um...no thanks, I have to go." she replied while trying to move around him.

"Oh come on, just one round."

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Come on please?" he urged while pulling out a sack of money. "One round and you could win this whole bag. I've been saving it up for a rainy day, and I think you might have a chance, I'm not an expert, but you could say I just want the time with you."

She blinked before sighing. "Fine, but to make things interesting, the bounty will be your underwear." 'That will make him leave me alone-'

"Alright, deal." he smiled.

She blinked at that before sighing while they sat on a table in the back. "Let's see how good your skills are acorn...I mean boy."

He set the bag down while she dealt the cards. "Acorn huh? You know you remind me of someone I know."

"Oh really?" She asked while folding.

"Yeah, but he's a man." he smiled while she started handing the cards out. "The funny thing is, you could pass for him if he was a woman. Pretty crazy to hear isn't it?"

"Yeah, crazy." She said while putting some chips in. "But tell me, what makes you so sure? I could just as well be his sister or mother."

"Not possible. His mother would be much older, and he doesn't have a sister I know of." he replied looking at his cards. "You could say we're dealing with issues at the moment."

"Issues?" She said with a raised eyebrow.

"It's a long story. Me and him are fighting over something stupid that our families have been at for generations. I thought we could be good friends, but we were sort of like rivals in a way. We'd try to one up each other, but I usually won in our games."

"I see, Two of a kind."

"Straight ace."

She grumbled while losing the pot. "But really, if you're rivals then why act like it's a day in the park?"

"Because honestly, we were pulled into this fight without really experiencing any fighting beforehand. I just wanted someone I could talk to and relate, and he was the first." he moved his cards around. "When I learned who he really was I was surprised, but I didn't feel hatred for him like my clan did. From what I learned he was an ok guy, even if he was a bit stuffy at times."

She sighed. "What if he's stuffy because he has someone to protect?" she put some chips in.

"Oh I don't mind that, I just wanna make sure he can relax sometimes, especially during this time when so many people have lost their lives." he looked down. "I've always dreamed of a world where we could stop cause if we don't now, future generations might not either."

"A pointless dream." She said. "While a good idea it has flaws, especially if you count anyone after this generation to botch it up with corrupt ideas."

"I'm not saying it perfect, but the least we can do is try. Haven't you ever had a dream that might seem like it has flaws, but you can't help but still wanna go through with it?"

"Yeah, and fathers are annoying." She grumbled. "Especially those that like arranged marriages to people you don't know. That includes deceased ones."

"Oh? I take it that's your case?" he asked tossing more chips in.

"Unfortunately." She grumbled. "Pair of tens."

"Same."

"I mean I'm about to marry soon yet I don't want to. Call me a romantic but I despise loveless marriages." She sighed while putting chips in. "For me, I want to marry a boy that I know."

"Well think of it this way, if he's big he might end up dying from a stroke." he smiled from the dark humor before looking away. "Sorry, I really shouldn't say something like that."

"No no, it's fine. Plus it's good you can joke around, I like that in a man."

"Well I feel pretty lucky to meet you miss…"

"If you win, I'll tell you, but right now call me Fortune." She said while smirking. "Royal Flush."

"Damn it!"

She grinned while taking the pot. "I hope you don't lose, I don't want to be too harsh when I brag in your face."

"Ha, I might not look it, but I'm secretly a champ at this game."

"Oh really? Then prove it."

He smirked while getting ready.

(Ten hours later)

"Royal Flush!"

"Damn it!" He yelled while both were evenly matched in terms of chips.

"You were saying?" she chuckled. 'I didn't expect him to come this far, but I'm not gonna show mercy. Honestly the fact he hasn't noticed is shocking. Either he's more dense than I thought or I'm just good with looking like myself.'

'I need to win or onii-san's going to kill me!' He thought while folding.

"You know, you're all right." She smirked. "But you're too annoying to find your significant other."

"Funny, that's what my old pal use to say, the annoying part I mean." he replied looking at his cards. 'Why does this feel so familiar? And why do I feel like I should be focused on something else?'

"Then he must find you annoying." She said while folding. "Or he thinks you're a better friend then your realize."

"Well I'll admit, if we could sit down and help lead our clans to peace once and for all, I wouldn't mind if he stayed serious and grumpy all the time. Heck, if he was as beautiful like you I might kiss him just for the heck of it." he chuckled. "But that probably sounds just nuts coming from me."

She blushed. "A little, but you have a point. If you two can stay in one place without fighting, then it's possible to be together. But how to do it is another thing altogether."

"Well at least I got to spend this day playing with a beautiful woman. You could probably put most women I've seen to shame." he complimented before looking at his hand closely. 'One more card and I've got this.'

She turned crimson before shaking her head. "So you think I'm beautiful, well I am more of a goddess than most." she then pull all her chips in. "All in for me."

"Someone's conceded." he chuckled while pushing his own pile in.

"Takes one to know one." She grinned as they drew their last card. "Flush."

Hashirama looked at his hand and let out a deep chuckle before setting them down. "Read it and weep."

She went wide eyed as the cards showed a Royal Flush. "Ah...ah…." 'I...I lost…?'

"Seems like I won." he took the pile with a smile. "But there's still one last thing."

"What? More gloating?"

"No, your name. You said if I won you'd tell me."

She sighed before smirking. "I'll tell you but you have to close your eyes first."

"Oh? And why is that? Trying to run out on our deal?"

"Oh no I'm not that harsh." She said. 'But it helps for later.' "Just close your eyes and I'll tell."

He shrugged and closed his eyes.

She smirked before doing some hand signs as she vanished in a puff of smoke.

He waited for ten minutes before opening his eyes. "That sneaky women. Seems like a sore loser to me."

(Some time later)

Hashirama blinked as a Uchiha ninja stood in front of him with a scroll in his hands.

"..."

"..."

"..."

"What's this about?"

"You've been summoned by the Uchiha patriarch." he handed the scroll to him before disappearing in a puff of smoke.

"Huh?" He looked at the scroll before opening it to see only one word. "Acorn head?" 'What does my old nickname have to do with anything?' He sighed before heading out.

-Uchiha stronghold, patriarch room-

"Here." Spoke a guard while showing him in. "Now wait Senju."

He walked in while the door shut and looked around. 'Why would Madra suddenly want to see me? Is this an attempt to strike with my guard lowered?'

As he looked at the room, he noticed it was fashioned like a newlyweds room with two beds in the center.

'And why is his decorations so poor?'

"Welcome." Spoke a voice from behind a see through sliding door that obscured the image slightly. "I take it the guards did their job."

"Madra." he turned to the figure. "Might I ask why you asked me to come here alone?"

"It's simple, I have some news that might give you some comfort."

"Like what? You brought me here for a party with sake?" he joked while crossing his arms. "The day that happens is the day the moon falls down."

"Maybe." Spoke the voice. "But it might be a different kind of party because I decided to have peace."

"Really?" he looked at the figure in surprise. "Wait, are you trying to fool me, mock me, or both? Because you've never tried for that before."

"True, but recently I've had a chance of heart." Madra spoke while the figure moved up. "I'll allow it in exchange for something from you."

"Which is what? Land? Money?"

"No." The figure said before opening the door to reveal the same woman from a month ago but without the bun and wearing a wedding kimono. "Just you acorn head."

Hashirama went wide eyed and breathless. "Y-You, you're from that town."

"I am." She chuckled. "Really I'm surprised you didn't remember me or recognized me."

"Wait…." he let that memory sink in and feel his jaw drop open. "Oh sweet lord…..you're a woman?!"

"I have been for years, you just thought I was a boy because I wasn't mature back then."

"That's putting it mildly." he muttered while staring at her body. 'I knew something was off, and here I thought I was into men.'

"I have to say however, you really made me have a rush of energy that day." She smirked. "Even if you won I still got what I wanted."

"What exactly is that porcupine?"

"Your heart."

He blushed and coughed while looking away. "Well I wouldn't say that, I will admit though you did look fetching in that kimono."

"Thank you, I knew that would make you happy." She grinned while walking over. "But you know, I'm still sore about the poker game."

"I warned you." he spoke while blushing at seeing her up close. 'Wow, she really did grow into a beauty. I can't believe I never noticed till now!'

Madra grinned before grabbing him. "I think the time for talk is over, it's time to win this battle."

He shook his head and grinned back. "I wouldn't act so cocky yet, porcupine."

"Same with you acorn head." She grinned before the camera dimmed.

(Years later)

A small village was still being built by numerous people, most of which were Uchiha or Senju. And looking on was the newly appointed Hokage.

And he was busy with paperwork.

"Why do I feel like this will be a burden for years to come?" He grumbled while finishing a stack of papers.

As he finished the fifth load he didn't notice that a woman with a eight month belly was sneaking up behind him. The sensation of cloth against armor woke him up before feeling a kunai to the neck.

"Hello acorn head."

He smiled and chuckled. "Hey there porcupine, here to try and kill me when I'm miserable?"

"Perhaps." Madra joked. "But maybe I'm here to see if you're ready to have lunch."

He blinked as he turned and saw her holding a boxed lunch. "In that case," he reached up and easily pulled her onto his lap while watching her belly and took it. "care to eat it with me?"

She chuckled at that. "As long as you don't mistake me as food. You can't just eat your son now can you dear?"

He nervously chuckled at that since he did 'eat' her at night especially when she put actual food on her. He opened the box and ate some rice while feeding her some. "Well be careful you don't eat too much or it'll really get to your butt."

"You know you love my ass." She teased. "Especially when you grab it every morning before work."

He blushed again since he loves her ass, and breasts, and everything about her. "But tell me, how are the matters with the clan?"

"Besides your brother still frustrated at me, fine." She said with a growl. "I mean, it's not like I wanted to be hated. Like really he's just sore about the marriage that's all."

"Don't worry, I bet if he meets the right girl he'll relax."

"Ha!" She laughed. "When that happens is the day I decide to make a jutsu that permanently changes boys into pigtailed girls!"

"Honestly seeing you laugh like that is the last thing I'd expect when we first met."

"Same with you." She giggled. "I mean, you really were clueless back then."

He smirked while 'accidentally' getting some soy sauce on her nose. "Oops, look like someone got some on herself. And here I thought you were mature enough not to do that."

She frowned at that before sighing. "Then clean it up if I'm so immature. I dare you."

"Sure-" he tried to say before seeing her licking it off with her tongue.

"Too slow." she smirked.

He frowned before smirking. "I guess I have to clean that mouth of yours then."

"You acorn head." She giggled while kissing him on the lips. 'Who would have guessed I'd be married to a Senju?'

'I really love my Uchiha wife.' He thought as the screen shifted to the scroll, now fixed and showing the screen in its entirety as the camera moved back and away before showing the now huge village with the lovers faces on it while the screen went black.