Crazy trouble with love part 4
Ahrryp, Ruby, Pyrrha, and Jaune
Series: RWBY
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It's been a month since the incident with the two evil personals and everything slowly went back to normal. Except for a mass funeral for Cardin and some jail time for the one called Ner. But other then that life was back to semi normal.
Ren and Nora were sitting on the bed just looking out the window together.
"I love you Ren."
"Same with you." Ren smiled.
They smiled at each other as Aron made a gagging sound and walked out to find Jaune.
'Those two make me wanna puke!' She thought while Pyrrha bumped against her. "Watch it redhead!"
"Oh! Sorry." she apologized while walking past her.
"Just let me find MY Jaune." She growled before turning a corner.
'My Jaune this and my Jaune that. It's starting to get me annoyed.' She thought while a little annoyed at her talking about her friend. 'She acts like he's gonna up and vanish.'
As she walked in she noticed the good halfs of her friends cuddling with smiles. Which made her happy yet sad at the same time.
'This whole thing is too crazy. I mean it brought them together yes, but it caused a murder. A murder!' She thought while recalling the events in her mind. 'Just why did that talisman have to exist?' "Hey guys."
"Hi." Ren smiled. "What's going on Pyrrha?"
"Need a hug?" Nora asked.
"No thanks."
"Aw."
"Look, I was curious, what did you do with that talisman?"
"Oh that." Ren said. "Nora put it in a safe, which is in a hidden spot."
"Which is where?"
"Under the laundry, Ruby's to be exact." Nora smiled. "Nothing can get to it when it's smelly."
'Good point.'
"And I have the key." She said while taking out a iron key. "See, nothing can get in and steal that thing."
"Unless it's going into the laundry."
"Oh yeah….isn't it today Ren?"
"Yes it is. But it might need a good cleaning anyway."
"Good idea."
Pyrrha blinked hearing that before getting an idea. 'If I can get it back I can use it to put them back together. That way everything will return to normal and I can get rid of this thing.' "Thanks, see you two around."
"Ok."
"See you." Ren said as Pyrrha left. "So...want to do it?"
"...ok."
(With Pyrrha)
-Laundry room-
She looked around at the machines and tried to find the right one. 'Where is Ruby's laundry?'
She continued to look around before seeing a red cape hanging on a clothesline near the back as a dryer was being used. 'There you are.' She then noticed a MASSIVE safe with a keyhole on it near the machine. 'My Dust….just how much laundry did it take to hide that?'
The machine dinged as Pyrrha walked towards the safe.
'If I use my Semblance I should be able to open it up, but it'll take a lot of concentration.' She thought before using her ability to carefully pick the lock.
(One hour later)
'Just a little more.'
Click.
The safe came undone as it slowly opened to reveal another safe inside.
"Oh come on!"
(Ten safes later)
Click.
'Finally.' She thought as the safe opened to reveal a box with a bow on it. She reached and pulled it out before opening it.
Inside was another box.
Her eye twitched and opened that too.
Only for another box to be revealed.
'Just how many boxes are there?!' She thought before opening it to reveal two more boxes and FINALLY the talisman. "After this is over I'm going to smash you."
The talisman just stared blank at her with cold stony eyes.
She was about to leave when she noticed the rock glowing a little. 'What the...oh no!'
It glowed even more before causing an energy wave that hit Pyrrha directly and caused her to split in two.
"Ugh...what the fuck happened?"
"Don't curse….it's rude."
Both Pyrrha's laid on the floor with one rubbing her head and the other standing up and dusting herself off.
"That hurt like hell." she looked at the other Pyrrha. "And news flash, I'll curse when I want to, especially since things have changed."
"How so?" She asked meekly.
"Are you blind? I'm free! I'm free from a weakling like you, and I'm gonna use this chance to live my life."
"Um….I'm not that weak." She muttered. "And how are you going to live your life?"
"By making a name for myself!" she declared before running out of the laundry room. "I'm using your credit card for some new clothes!"
"But we don't have one." she tried speaking before the other Pyrrha disappeared. "She's going to get hurt. I hope she'll be ok."
(With the evil Pyrrha)
Yang sighed as she waxed Bumblebee while listening to some jazz. "When I'm done you'll look brand new."
That was when she noticed her keys floating away as Pyrrha jumped onto the motorcycle and turned the key.
"Later sucker!" She laughed before burning rubber and zoomed out of the garage as Yang became covered in soot and exhaust.
"...PYRRHA!"
"Hahahaha! Woo! Now these are some wheels!" laughed Pyrrha heading into town. And causing some accidents along the way, included a massive car crash on the highway.
"Hey watch it!"
"Where did you learn to drive lady?!"
"You little bastard!"
"Dumb human!"
She flipped them off while driving down the street before slowing down near a clothing store. As she entered the shop she saw a black jacket with spikes on the sides, with some pants with massive holes near the hips, with huge black boots with spikes on the tips. "Just my style."
She then walked in and grabbed the clothes.
(One change later)
"That will be 999,000,000 lien." Spoke the cashier. "Plus tax."
"Hmmm, I got a better idea." she grabbed him by his neck and pulled him over the counter while he gabbed from the pressure. "I walk out here without paying one lien, and I won't tie you up and drag you by my new ride, how's that sound?"
He gulped. "I-It's on the house." he then discretely eyed the next cashier to call the cops. "In fact...keep it. It's on me."
She grinned at that. "Thank you kindly sir." she then threw him back. "You're fine, for a weakling."
The doors busted open as the cops stormed the place. "Freeze!"
"You're underweared!" One cop said.
"It's under arrest."
"I knew that!"
The evil Pyrrha turned to them and smirked. "Or what? You're going to shoot me?"
All of them cocked the hammers on their guns.
She grinned giving them the finger. "Try me punks. Fucking try me."
"One last time, freeze and put your hands up."
"How about you piss off and let me have fun. I hear that the bars here are to die for."
BANG!
Bullets flew at her before they stopped in mid air.
"I warned you." She said before making them turn and fired at their heads.
Luckily some of them dodged and rolled behind some pillars.
"We need support! I repeat! We need support!"
She laughed before running out of the store and hopped on Bumblebee. "Ha hahaha! Catch me you copper fucks!"
VRUM….VRRRUUUMMMM!
She drove down the street while zigzagging around to try and keep them from following. Only to see a few thugs entering a building.
(Inside building)
"So got the Dust?" Asked Roman while looking at the White Fang grunts.
"Yeah, you got the cash?"
He pulled out a briefcase out and smirked. "Of course gentlemen."
"Ahem."
"And ladies."
They slid it to the others while the evil Pyrrha listened from behind a crate.
'He he he, oh I'm going to enjoy getting both the Dust and the cash!' She thought before making the grunts masks tighter and tighter.
"Ah!"
"My face!"
Roman saw them stumble while grabbing at their faces. "What's with you?"
"The masks…"
"They're-"
CRUNCH!
CRACK!
SPLATTER!
Their faces and skulls broke in on itself as blood and brain matter splattered everywhere.
"Holy shit!"
The evil Pyrrha smirked before causing the Dust and briefcase to float towards her before running off. But not before causing Roman's cane to turn and fire on his leg.
"OH FUCK!"
'Ha ha! I'm on top of the blooming world!' She laughed before speeding off. 'And my weak half is nowhere to be found!'
At the school the good Pyrrha walked down the hall while looking around nervously. "Oh Dust, where is she? This place isn't that big….right?"
As she walked she spotted Jaune. 'Jaune.' "Jaune, hi." She said before walking over to him.
"Oh hi Pyrrha, whats up?"
"Um, quick question, have you seen me around?"
"Huh? But I just saw you right now." He said before getting grabbed by Aron.
"There you are! I was looking for my baby maker and trust me, I'm ready for another round." she frowned at Pyrrha. "Don't bug us, we're gonna be busy."
"But….but you can't. He's my friend." She said meekly.
"Well he's my friend too, my extra special friend with benefits." she glared. "So buzz off."
Pyrrha gulped as Aron dragged Jaune away. "...I'm sorry Jaune." She looked down while clenching a fist. "I'm not strong enough."
Back with the evil Pyrrha she parked the ride behind Beacon while looking in the cases.
"Perfect." She grinned while looking over the Dust and cash. "Now I can buy anything I want!"
Cue Ruby walking by while eating a jar of cookies. "Yum, sugar cookies."
She quickly shut the cases and slid them to the side before hiding and watched her walk by while grinning. 'Hmm, I got a new ride, look, plenty of cash, now all I need is a fine peice of ass.'
"Maybe Blake can make some tuna cookies…..nah." She said to herself before noticing that something was touching her ass, a cold metallic thing too. She turned and saw a shovel rubbing her ass. "Yipe!" she jumped and looked at it in shock. 'A shovel is floating!'
The shovel then moved towards her before taking a feel of her chest.
"AH!" she pushed it back while dropping the jar. "Stay back you weird...floating shovel….thing!"
It moved closer to her while Ruby started to freak out.
"Get back! I mean it!"
It moved closer as it 'looked' at Ruby's face.
"A-AHHH!" She screamed before seeing it drop on the ground. She bolted away while evil Pyrrha snickered.
"Perfect, but now I'm going to spend my stolen goods. Mmm….maybe a new seat for the bike?"
(Sometime later)
"Guys! Shovel!"
"Huh?" Yang said while on her Scroll. "Hold on I'll call you back Neo. Yes I love you too, bye."
"Evil shovel! It's EVIL!"
"What do you mean?" Blake asked while rubbing Weiss' shoulders. "Shovels aren't evil."
"Then why did one just start moving at me like it was haunted or possessed?"
"Because you're a dunce." Weiss deadpanned. "Ah, you're a natural Blake."
"I know, and I'm only doing it for you."
"I'm serious! It just floated out of nowhere!"
"Uh huh." Blake said before seeing Crescent Rose floating towards Ruby and grabbed her by the hood. "On second thought, you might be right."
"AH!" She cried out before the weapon started to float above the room and dangled her a little. "HELP ME GUYS!"
"I'll get you!" Yang called out before seeing her weapons floating at her and loaded the barrels. "Shit!"
The weapon fired at the wall behind her as Blake's weapons started to wrap around its master and the Schnee heiress.
"Hey!" cried Weiss as they tried breaking out. "Get off me!"
That was when her sword moved towards her and pointed towards her left eye.
"AHH!" She screamed as Crescent Rose started to float away with Ruby.
"LET ME GO!" she cried flailing around as she was carried out of the room.
"RUBY!" Yang screamed as the door was shut and the weapons continued to point at them.
(With good Pyrrha)
'Why can't I find the strength to tell Jaune?' she thought twiddling her thumbs. 'If I can just say the words it should work, right?' She then noticed that a floating scythe with Ruby thrashing on the tip was flying towards her. "What the….?"
"Pyrrha! Help!"
"How?" She asked while conflicted.
"Get me down!"
"But….why?" 'Should I help or not?'
"Because you can use magnetism!"
"It's polarity."
"Just help!"
She gulped before stopping the scythe and slowly moved her towards her. 'Don't slip up don't slip up.'
"Thanks." sighed Ruby. "You're a lifesaver."
She nodded before hugging her. "I'm sorry."
"Um for what?"
"For not helping you sooner." She said hugging tighter. "I'm sorry."
Ruby looked at her confused before patting her on the back. "Uh...there there."
She hugged a little more. "Ruby, I'm sorry. I'm just...sad today."
"About what?"
"...about Jaune and Aron."
"Ooohhhh, I think I know why."
"Why? Because I….like Jaune?"
"Yup."
She looked down. "It's not fair, it's just not. I like him but….she took him away and I'm...too weak to do anything." She looked at Ruby. "Please help me, I...I don't know what to do."
Ruby blinked hearing this. "Well...why not just try and talk to him without her around?"
"I'm just worried he wouldn't like me the same way." She said sadly. "Plus every time we talk alone Aron shows up and tells me to leave. It's so mean."
"Well maybe you could….um tell her to bug off?"
"I can't, it's rude."
'Something's wrong. She's acting more polite and meek, kinda….like Nora!' her eyes widened. "Pyrrha, did you happen...to split in two like Nora and Ren?"
"Yes. I'm sorry." She bowed. "I'm so sorry Ruby."
"But if you're here, then where's…"
The scythe came back to life and grabbed her underwear before giving her a wedgie.
"EEP!" she cried out in pain and wide eyes before the panties tore and she fell down. "Ow!"
"He he he." Laughed a voice from behind her. "Looks like the little princess has fallen. Let me help you up."
"Ahrrya." The good half said. "That was….mean."
"Oh stuff it." She frowned before pulling Ruby up. "Hello princess."
Ruby frowned before noticing her attire. "What are you wearing?"
"Just something sexy and tough." She grinned. "Especially for my ass."
'This is definitely her bad half.'
"So what has my weak half been asking you for? That spineless boy and her bitch friend?"
"Jaune's not spineless."
"Then why is he weak as hell?"
"He's not, he's just….well he's working on that." spoke up Ruby.
She frowned before smacking her ass. "How about we ditch the girl and have some fun on my new ride?"
She frowned at that while good Pyrrha looked at the evil version with a clenched fist.
"I'll let you sleep on my back princess."
"How about no."
"Oh?" she reached down and pinched Ruby's ass.
"Eep!"
"And what if I don't want to?" She smirked before the good Pyrrha walk up to her and punched her in the face.
"Stop it!"
Ahrryp looked at her with a frown and reached out before grabbing her around the throat.
Pyrrha gasped and started to choke while struggling to break free.
"You're dead."
The good half gasped before using her Semblance to pull down her pants visa belt.
Ahrryp's eyes widened before Ruby took the chance to grab the panties and pull them down too.
"Wow you got a fat ass." Ruby grinned before slapping it hard.
"EEEPPP!" She cried out while letting go of Pyrrha.
"Ah...ah...my butts not fat…." Pyrrha gasped.
"It's kind of fat." Ruby said before smacking it harder.
"EEEPPP!"
"How do you like that?"
"It's….good~" she moaned.
That got Ruby to jump back in shock. 'Didn't expect that! At all!'
"Keep it up princess."
Ruby blushed. 'No way, does she…'
"Come on, slap that ass~" she said while shaking her ass.
She gulped before slapping it harder.
"AH~ Princess~" she moaned with lust.
"She likes you." Pyrrha said while blushing red. "A lot by the...look of it." 'I wish Jaune did that to me.'
"W-What?!"
"Princess, slap my ass~"
"Um, I think that's good for now." she spoke stopping.
Ahrrya frowned before turning around and flipped her off. "Bitch."
"Hey!"
"You don't have to be mean. I mean you like Ruby so...why call her a dog?"
She glared at Pyrrha. "It's called motivation, learn it!"
"How?"
"Just fuck off and just go find your weak friend."
She frowned before walking off, but not before causing the belt to float as she left her hooked on a lamp.
"Hey!"
"Later." She said while turning a corner.
"Come back here you little bitch!" She yelled before Ruby took a picture of her ass. "Hey! Get rid of that!"
"Nope." She grinned. "Not until you apologize."
"Hell no!"
"Then I'll just have to show this to the entire school." she smirked turning and started walking away.
"Hey get back here princess!"
"Not until you say the word."
"Just do it!"
"Nope, not it."
She growled at that. "...please?"
"I'm sorry, what?"
"I said….please."
"Huh?"
"Please let me down princess!" She blushed.
Ruby smirked before using Crescent Rose to pull her down by her panties. "See? Was that so hard?"
She frowned as her panties were ripped. "..." 'Damn her cute evil face.'
"Now tell me, what's with the whole….biker outfit?"
"I'm my own person princess. I'm not the weakling."
"Pyrrha's not a weakling, and it's Ruby."
"She is and it's all the same for me." She rolled her eyes. "And she is weak, always trying to not fight her way out of problems and acting like a baby."
"Well you're weak too. You're insulting her when she can't help it, you two split apart because of that rock thingy. You two need to be put back together again."
"Yeah and let both our problems escalate? Fat chance princess."
"Huh? What problems?"
"The weaklings' issue with the blond and my own will to be free." She grumbled. "Those are the fucking problems we have now princess."
"Well….won't it be fixed when you get put back together?"
"Meh, even if that happened, which it won't. Nothing will change, I'll still be pissed and the weakling will be the bridesmaid at those fools wedding."
Ruby blinked at that while imagining the entire scenario in her head. 'That's gonna scar her for life.'
Ahrryp stood up. "Now if you excuse me I'm going to get some grub."
"No you're not."
"And why not princess?"
"Because I'm going to put you back together."
"...you and what army?"
"Me and the others of course."
She frowned before smirking. "Oh? So you want to flirt with me in front of everyone? Wow you're bold princess."
She blushed at that.
"Maybe we could bump uglies, if you know what I mean~" she winked at her.
She blushed bright enough to match her cape and shook her head. "You know what I mean!"
She moved closer while looking seductive. "Oh come on now, it will be fun princess."
'This is weird beyond belief!' She thought before seeing the evil side lick her neck.
"I know you'll enjoy this bad girl~"
She jumped and bolted away.
Ahrryp blinked before pulling her pants up. "Playing hard to get huh? Two can play that game princess." she ran after her while we cut back to Pyrrha.
"Jaune." She muttered while walking down the hall. "What would to do in this situation?" she looked at her dorm room and gulped. 'If he's alone, should I tell him?'
Knock knock.
No sound was heard except for the sounds of a whip. A very loud one at that.
"AH! ARON!"
"Silence Jaune! Your mistress needs sperm for the babies!"
KWHIP!
Pyrrha flinched with a bright blush. 'Oh god….that's….hot.' She then steeled herself before using her Semblance to cause the chair inside to move towards the door as it opened to reveal a naked Jaune, bounded by ropes, with Nora still on top of him while holding a whip.
"What do you say?"
"Please mistress!"
"Good." Aron smirked before noticing that they were out of the room. "What the fuck?"
"Um can you two….talk to me please?"
"No, we're busy." glared Aron. "Get lost."
Pyrrha looked at them before saying. "I'm not going. Jaunes mine!"
They got both of them pretty surprised and shocked in the case of Jaune.
"Pyrrha…"
She looked at him and smiled. "I...I love you. And I'm sad you and Aron did this….before I could."
"Pyrrha...I didn't-"
"Oh cry me a river!" Aron growled. "Jaune's mine!"
"No...he's mine you slut!" she spoke with a glare. "And I'll prove it!"
"Oh really? You're going to fuck him?"
She nodded. "I'm going to show you who likes Jaune more."
She smirked. "Alright, I'll humor you and let you have a shot, and if you're good, I might make you into my second pet."
"And if I win you're going to let me be the alpha."
"You're on."
"Um...do I have a say in this?" Jaune asked.
"No." both said at the same time.
'Figures.'
(At the same time)
Ruby looked around while holding a lamp. 'Ok. Crazy evil Pyrrha with a flirty attitude looking for you for smut...yeah I'm screwed!'
"Princess! Where are you!"
She gulped as Ahrryp walked by her hiding spot, a bathtub, while looking around. 'Please don't open the curtains!'
"I know you're somewhere, come out and let's have a ride on my harley~"
'That sounds a little kinky, but if I start doing that with my friend's evil half I'll never live it down!' She thought before seeing the girl near the bathtub. 'Shit!'
"Princess, are you in," she opened the curtains. "Here!"
"AHHH!"
BASH!
"Ow!" she held her head and stumbled. "What the hell was that?!"
Ruby didn't answer as she ran out of the room screaming before running into Ozpin's office….when he was looking at Glynda naked on a video camera feedback.
"What a fascinating chest you have Glynda." he grinned. "It seems to stay perfect no matter how much time passes."
"Um…..Ozpin." Ruby coughed. "If you're done looking at your 'girlfriend', can you oh I don't know….HELP ME!"
"Hang on." he kept watching and looked. "Alright, what is it?"
"Remember the incident from a few months back?"
"Yes, the one with the evil and good halfs of Mister Lie and Miss Valkyrie. What about it?"
"Well….it happened again. With Pyrrha." She gulped. "And the evil one wants to….bump uglies with me."
He blinked and sipped from his cup. 'That sounds hot.'
"What should I do?!" Ruby asked in fear.
"It's quite simple, just get the jump on her."
"What?! How is that better!?"
"If you can get her into a position where she can't escape, then you can make sure that she won't harm you or cause problems involving your virginity."
"Like what?"
"Simple, just bound her in something without metal and then put her into a room with no metal or exits."
"Um and where can I find the room?"
"No idea."
She deadpanned. 'Thanks.'
"By the way, I recommend giving her a calm chin holding and call her adorable. It works a lot more times then you think."
Ruby facepalmed hearing that before getting an idea. A devious and almost demonic idea. "Thanks, I'll be right back."
"Good luck Miss Rose." He said before noticing Glynda wasn't on the screen. 'Huh?'
"OZPIN!"
"I'll just leave you two alone." Ruby sweatdropped before running out the door.
'Damn it, now I'm going to die before seeing her shake her ass in that new red underwear she got.'
(With our heros)
Yang walked by JNPR's room while texting her girlfriend before hearing something behind the closed door. 'Oh great, those two are at it again.'
"Pyrrha! Why the dildo in my ass!"
"For….sex appeal?"
"Oh be quiet and take that cock like a woman!"
"I'm about to cum!"
"AHH!"
"My turn!"
Yang stood there shocked and running a nosebleed before thinking. 'Ok, I'm getting Neo to do that the next time we meet!'
With Ahrryp she was fuming and looking around. "Damn that princess! All I want is to tease her and she up and runs off?! Ooh I love that girl too much!"
As she walked down a hall she noticed some of Ruby's pink panties on the ground. "Oh ho oh? Looks like she's running around commando style, now I really gotta find her."
She then picked it up and pulled on it before noticing it was used. "Mmm, nice." She said before Neptune grabbed them.
"Oh you found my….sisters panties. Thanks." 'I hope she didn't find my name on the tag?' He then walked away.
'...what the hell?' She thought with a 'wtf' face plastered on before getting jumped by Ruby as ropes were tied all around her body. "Hey!"
"Got you!"
"Let me go princess!"
"No way, this time I call the shots."
She growled at that while trying to get out of the binds. "You little!"
Ruby smirked before picking her up, with difficulty, and put her on her shoulder. "Come...along...I'm going...to make you….a woman…." 'So heavy!'
"What? Is that all?"
"What did you expect….a kiss? A smack on the ass?"
"Yes. Yes I did princess."
"Well too bad miss fatass that likes to scare the living crap out of me!"
Ahrryp deadpanned. "It's called flirting you cute fool of a princess."
She blushed again hearing that part before walking away.
"Hey! Let me out of this!"
"No way. You'll try to fuck me or something!" She yelled while giving her a death glare.
"Who said I was going to do that? I was teasing, I'm not ready to go THAT far with you until later this week."
"Wait….really?"
"Duh? I'm evil but I'm not THAT evil like your friends. Plus really who would fuck a guy AFTER being out for less than a day?!"
'She's got a point. That and Aron was worse given her personality, same with Ner.'
"Look, let me go and I swear on my hair not to try anything on you until a weeks over."
Ruby blinked while contemplating that. 'On one hand she seems serious, on the other, I'd have to deal with this eventually.'
Ahrryp yawned a little. "Hurry up, I think my feet are falling asleep."
"I'm thinking!"
She grumbled.
(One hour of thinking later)
"Ok you have a deal."
"Zzzzzzz."
"WAKE UP!"
"AH!" She screamed. "Fuck you princess! That was fucking scary!"
"You fell asleep when I came up with an answer!"
"You took too long princess." Ahrryp frowned. "Who wouldn't fall asleep from that?"
"Look, I'm willing to let you go, but remember. No tricks or else I'm putting you back together."
'I'd like to see that happen.' "Fine."
Ruby put her down and smiled. "No tackling or punches and kicks."
"Just undo the ropes."
She undid the ropes before helping her up. Only to get lifted up into the air and placed on Ahrryp's shoulders. "Hey!"
"I'm not breaking the deal, I'm just getting payback for jumping me princess." She smirked before rubbing the ass. "And milking it all up as well."
'Why me?!' she thought as she was carried away.
(With Pyrrha)
"Ah...ah...I won." She painted while letting the sperm flow into her womb. "Jaune's….mine…"
"No….you both….are mine." panted Aron.
"Ugh….my cock…." groaned Jaune.
"I….I'm the….one for Jaune…."
"No….me…."
"Me…"
"Me…."
Jaune groaned before grabbing their breasts.
"Ah~"
"Mmm~" hummed Aron. "I think….I'll get a new collar….for you…..tomorrow."
"In your….dreams…."
"Oh it will be...it will be."
Jaune groaned again while feeling like he just entered another form of hell, a kinkier one at that. 'I hope they don't team up again, my back can't handle the whips again.'
Both girls looked at each other and smirked while thinking of more ways to keep their Jaune.
(With Ozpin)
"Um is this necessary?" He asked while naked and hogtied.
"For peeping on me? Yes, yes it is." Glynda said while cracking her riding crop. "Now to see that bottom a different shade of red."
'Sweet Dust! Oh well, it's better than death by ass.'
"Oh and I'm going to call the local doctor, maybe he knows about human castration?"
His eyes widened. 'Oh sweet Dust, help!'
Glynda grinned as the screen went black. "Say goodbye to your dick."
"AAAHHH!"