A/N: Thank you for the reviews and thanks to all the follows. Also many thanks to my beta Sarah. And so they meet.
Chapter three
Today, one year ago, was the day that she lost him and her world had turned upside down. It was the day she'd dreaded the entire week. A day she just wanted to survive and forget. She'd decided that besides the necessary walks with Jethro she was going to stay in her house. At first she'd told herself she wasn't going to drink any alcohol, but she knew she wasn't going to keep that promise. The alcohol would help her forget the memories and dull the pain. She'd hardly slept so she decided to get up. Jethro, who was usually very excited when she got up, was quiet. He sensed his boss' mood. She got dressed in some sweatpants and a large sweater. Though the weather was nice and warm these days, the early mornings were still chilly. With Jethro by her side she left her home and started their daily walk.
He was on the beach already. Knowing Lizzie like he did, even if it had been a year since he'd seen her, he knew she'd be up by the break of dawn. He saw her walk with her dog. Her shoulders slumped, she held her head down and didn't even look at the dog. The dog was unusually quiet too and he guessed he'd picked up on his owner's mood. He saw her sit down on the beach, her knees drawn up against her chest. She put her head on her knees and after a few minutes he saw her body starting to tremor. He felt his heart constrict. He had caused her this pain. This was his fault. He'd never wanted to hurt her but knew he had hurt her the most with his faked death. She looked so broken. He wanted to heal her, he wanted her to heal him. He needed them to heal together. He left her on the beach. He had to go back to Angela. After that he would come back to her and would make his presence known.
It was later than he'd planned when he arrived outside of Lizzie's house. He took a deep breath. He was nervous. It had been so long he'd been near her. He had to prepare himself for the rush of feelings it would cause within him. He had to prepare for her anger and rejection. But he would fight for her. He would persevere because they needed each other. As he approached the house he heard the dog barking. As he reached the first step to get on the porch he saw the door open. His breath caught in his throat. The dog came out first and spotted him immediately. He bared his teeth and growled but kept his distance. Lizzie stumbled out of her door, not as steady on her feet as usual because of the alcohol.
"Jethro." Jethro hardly ever growled and she didn't understand why he was doing so now. She opened the door further and turned her back for a moment to close her door. Jethro kept growling and started barking also. Lizzie turned around and was ready to reprimand her dog when she saw a figure on her porch. It was a familiar figure. It was a man that couldn't be here. It was the man that haunted her nightmares and left a hole in her heart. She took a step back and leaned against the door. Her mind had decided to play a painful trick on her, making her believe that he was back with her again.
Red watched her and saw the disbelief and tears in her eyes. He was thrilled to finally be near her again but her appearance shocked him. She was thinner than he'd thought she'd be. Her eyes were dull and it was obvious she wasn't sleeping well.
"Hello Lizzie." It felt good to finally say her name again.
"No." She said, shaking her head. No, this wasn't true. He wasn't here. This wasn't real. This was the alcohol playing tricks on her. "No." She said again, her voice shaky this time. "You're not real." She couldn't handle this. She turned around, opened the door and walked inside again.
He wanted to follow her immediately but couldn't. The big dog was blocking his path and was still baring his teeth. He had to make friends with the dog first. Carefully and making sure his posture was non threatening he took a step closer. He held is hand low and out with his palm up. He waited for the dog to approach and sniff him which he did after a few seconds. The dog sniffed his leg then walked around him before pushing his head against his hand. It was safe for him to go after his Lizzie. He patted the dog on his head. "Let's see how your girl is, huh." The dog barked his agreement and followed him into the house.
The house was dark and he wanted to turn on the light, but decided against it. He needed a moment for his eyes to adjust and then walked further into the house. Following the dog through the kitchen he walked into what appeared to be the living room. The room would probably be nice and light with beautiful views onto the sea if the curtains hadn't been drawn. He found her there pacing back and forth.
"No, no, no." Lizzie said as she saw him walk into her living room with Jethro. "You are not real." She shook her head and tapped her head with her finger. "Why?" She asked herself. Why was her mind doing this to her? Wasn't she in enough pain already? She reached for the bottle on the coffee table. She couldn't deal with this.
"I think you've had enough." He said. He closed the distance between them and grabbed the bottle from her hands. She started shaking again and he saw the tears rolling down her face. "Sweetheart." He whispered. The anguish in his voice apparent. He hated himself for doing this to her.
He took hold of her shoulders and pulled her into him, but she resisted. She pushed him away. Her whole body was shaking now and she stumbled towards the couch. But Red was quickly by her side again and took her in his arms. She started punching his chest with her fists but her attempts were weak. All strength had already left her body. After a few more weak punches she gave up. She laid her forehead against his chest and gave in to the body wrecking sobs.
"Don't do this to me, Red. It hurts too much." She croaked through the tears. "I'm not strong enough." She cried. That's when all her strength left her and she felt herself falling, but only for a moment.
"I've got you sweetheart. I'm never gonna let you go again." His arms tightened around her and he stopped her from falling to the ground. He lifted her up in his arms and walked them to the couch. He sat down and simply held her shaking body. He felt like he could hardly breath. He'd prepared for her anger and rejection but not for her pain and heartache. It broke his heart to see her in so much pain. He'd caused her this much pain. He didn't know if he could forgive himself for hurting her like this. He held her against his body and rubbed her back, hoping it would calm her down. By the way she kept crying he was afraid she was going to be out of breath. The dog was now at their side. He howled softly, sensing his boss' distress. He put his head on the couch and touched Lizzie's leg with his nose, letting her know he was there. Red saw the dog looking at him with big, sad eyes. "She'll be all right, buddy."
TBC..