Apologies! This chapter is much later than normal! Thank you for being very patient with us - it's hard to find time to update these days. Getting everything organized and ready to publish takes about an hour and we need to actually be able to sit down and do it ahaha. And we've been hard pressed for any free time now that Pokemon Go is out pfff
Gotta catch 'em all!
If you're not playing, you definitely should! It's a lot of fun and, dare we say, it encourages physical activity *shocked gasp*. If you already have the game, what are some of your favorite Pokemon that you've caught so far?
rated: M
summary: In a world of underground fighting only the strong survive, abiding by the rules of kill or be killed. In the Ring, a feeble emotion like hope is all it takes to destroy you. And yet it exists– and those who hold onto it play a dangerous game. But once you enter into the Ring, it will never let you go.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Infighting
hidden conflict or competitiveness within an organization
A couple of days later, as promised, Natsu found himself in Lucy's house. And it was a big one. The estate stretched on for miles, and could no doubt accommodate hundreds of people with ease.
Natsu felt like the place was going to swallow him whole, so he made sure to stick by Lucy's side. He feared getting separated from her.
This much space seemed unnecessary for a single person to live in by themselves. Natsu wondered if she ever got lonely.
Eagerly he investigated everything, from the rich cherry wood to the marble counteracts to the gold filigree in the fireplace. His stomach churned with a bit of discomfort. As exciting as it all was, the place put him on edge. It reminded him of one of the rich rooms.
But he said nothing, holding his tongue and forcing himself to get comfortable because this was Lucy's home and he was her guest. For the first time in a while they were going to spend some time together. He missed the privacy they had gotten, alone in a room with just a deck of cards spread out on his lap.
Of course at the time they hadn't really been alone or safe either, but the illusion remained the same. A rich looking room, alone, with Lucy. Of course she wasn't wearing a dress encrusted in rare gems this time, but Natsu thought she looked awfully pretty with the silly apron tied around her waist.
It was pink, with odd frills and quilted pockets decorated with a manner of eclectic buttons. He pressed his chin against the counter as he watched her cook, swirling a wooden spoon around the promised meal.
Chili con carne.
He smothered a grin over how she had remembered, and his mouth watered with desperate hunger.
"Natsu, it won't cook faster no matter how hard you stare at it." Lucy smirked at him, having caught him in the act of drooling all over her nice counter.
She wielded her wooden spoon like a sword, Natsu's eyes trailing over the sauce that clung to its surface as she waved it.
She used it like a baton to point to the living room. "Why don't you go pick out a movie and put it in the player?"
Natsu frowned, barely registering her words when there was such good smelling food nearby, but managing to cotton on to her request. A player? He swallowed nervously at what Lucy seemed to have described as a simple task but...
Gajeel didn't really have a TV, and as such didn't own a player. Natsu wasn't even sure what a "player" was.
But how hard could it be?
He remembered the large cassettes which always had made his eyes light up, and how his father had spoken about rewinding, turning and being careful. He even remembered them being swallowed by a black box.
Perhaps that was what Lucy wanted him to do. But no matter where he looked, none of the familiar, rectangular covers showed up. He found what he suspected to be the player, but without anything to insert, he felt rather helpless. And yet, he was unwilling to ask for help. He pouted at the hellish machine.
An orange light blinked back, mocking him.
With a groan, he got up and flung himself at the sofa, smothering his face with a cushion. It took quite some willpower not to angrily kick his feet into the air.
And this was how Lucy found him, a hand resting on her hip and her brows furrowed in disbelief.
"Do you maybe need some help?" she asked in amusement, making his head jerk up.
Natsu lifted a hand, pointing an accusing finger at the DVD player.
"It hates me," he declared.
"Maybe," Lucy replied with a cheeky grin, a little amused at the way he had taken to glaring at the dvd player from under the cushion. She walked around her coffee table and picked out a couple of movies from the console stands.
She was just glad she still had a dvd player and hadn't decided to have him try to figure out Netflix instead.
Natsu and his constant battle against technology was going to be a theme she would have to get used to. But as it was, she could at least guide him those first, shaky steps back into the current century.
"These are DVDs." She brought a couple over to him on the couch and dropped them on the table. "Which do you want to watch?"
The question was asked so lightly, but Natsu practically sprang up from the couch as if electrified. His eyes fell eagerly to the ones laid out in front of him, his fingers tapping a rhythmic pattern on the table next to the discs.
It was obvious he didn't really know which one to pick. None of the titles jumped out to him in a recognizable way, and he didn't know what he would actually like.
A thought, hazy vague in its distinction, sprang to her mind. Something Natsu had said when Lucy butchered his hair.
The movies almost every child watched, and the ones Lucy still kept.
"You remember Disney, right?" she asked carefully, and watched Natsu's forehead first wrinkle, and then smoothen out again as he perked. At his confirmation, Lucy got back up and scurried over to the drawer where she kept her rarely used collection of movies she was too old to watch, yet too attached to to just throw out.
Collecting a handful, she brought them back to him.
Out of the bunch, Natsu looked over the titles with interested eyes. The cartoon illustrations were bright and catchy, but something about them made his eyebrows crease. A flicker of worry seemed to touch his eyes as he went from one title to the next, and others made something like sadness creep through.
Whatever his thoughts were though, it seemed like he wasn't planning on sharing. At least not right away. She figured they reminded him of something.
His expression cleared when he eyed a movie out of the bunch, his fingers plucking Tarzan out of the stack.
"I don't think I've ever seen this one before..." Natsu looked a little eager, and Lucy smiled back at him, taking the copy from him.
Of all the titles he could have picked, she thought that one was the most appropriate.
She wondered if he'd realize the irony of his pick later on.
For now, though, they had a dinner to enjoy.
-::-
Natsu watched the movie numbly from where he was sprawled out on the couch. His thoughts weren't wholly on the gorilla boy. As he had flipped through the different covers, he'd been struck with the nostalgia of watching them with Igneel.
That, and he wondered if Wendy liked Disney movies.
The girl had cropped up more than once in his thoughts. And even more often in the dreams that would leave him stuttering and shaking late at night. Guilt twisted deeper and deeper into his heart for every day he was out and she was still in.
Which was ridiculous, because Natsu had already told the police everything he could. But still, he felt like he should be out there doing something to help Wendy instead of sitting around and trying to heal. Or read books about fairy tales.
But these moments he had with Lucy were precious, and he couldn't bring himself to regret them. No, he soaked up every second with her. He craved her smiles and laughs like they were a drug and he was an addict. There were times he found himself grappling for her attention, holding her hands for longer than she would probably deem appropriate, or even acting sillier than usual just to attract her eye.
No, these moments they had together were the highlights of his life.
Natsu felt a weight press against his shoulder, a shift of a soft body dripping into his tough skin. Blinking, he could smell the lightly floral scent of Lucy's shampoo.
The woman herself had dropped her head against his chest. Her eyes lifted to his curious gaze, a smile lighting her kind face. Natsu's heart ached with a yearning he couldn't act on. The need to touch, to treasure, to protect, all rose in him like a ferocious desire.
His jaw clenched as he looked at her, Lucy's dark eyes watching him.
There was a heat licking in him. It was a familiar one that hated to be ignored. And it made Natsu want. He wanted something for himself, a greedy, hungry, selfish thing that he couldn't have.
So he tore his gaze away, his heart racing at the feel of Lucy folding her legs up against his thigh. She wiggled her hips distractingly as she tried to get comfortable, Natsu forcing himself to look ahead at the screen.
He scooped a handful of popcorn from the bowl in his lap, cramming too much at once into his mouth. He chewed loudly on the flavorless corn, his eyes intent on the Phil Collins number that began to play on the screen.
Beside him, Lucy exhaled loudly, whacking her head back into the cushion. He glanced over at her, and caught her do the same. Like a scared deer, she averted her gaze.
Had he given his desire away so easily?
He had to try harder.
Natsu gobbled down his popcorn almost aggressively, and found himself confronted with an empty bowl far too early for his liking. The movie was not over yet.
It had been his only coping mechanism.
Lucy's thigh was tightly pressed against his, and somehow she managed to move it enticingly against his with every small movement. He swallowed.
And then he almost jumped right off the couch when her slender hands wound around his arm, softly gripping onto him like a spider monkey. With a content sigh, she rested her head on his shoulder.
Was she trying to kill him?
With her so tightly wedged against him, fitting into his side so snugly, his last grip on the movie slipped. He stared blankly at the screen, all his senses trained only on the woman at his side.
He was sure her gaze kept flitting to him, staring at the side of his face more than at the movie itself, and it drove him insane.
But every time he returned her gaze, she would look back down, biting her lip.
It made him want to take it between his own, gently lick along it to soothe the sensitive skin. To taste her again.
Blowing out a strained breath through his nose, Natsu gripped the pillows beneath him more tightly.
And then she shifted again, only slightly, and suddenly he felt her lips brush along his jaw before placing down a soft kiss. His skin tingled where her open lips lingered.
For a second, he stiffened, but then turned his face the last centimeters to look at her, his eyes wide and (damn him) hopeful.
Hers were hooded, such a desperate, subdued want in them that something in Natsu's stomach coiled forcibly.
One of her hands played with the fluffy hair at the nape of his neck almost absentmindedly, while the other palmed against the left side of his face, thumb stroking along his cheek and jawline as she turned him towards her completely.
The ability to think straight had long left either's mind.
She pushed herself the little rest upwards, and Natsu couldn't process what was happening to him, if maybe he had fallen asleep and was dreaming.
But the touch of her soft lips against his felt all too real, the sigh that escaped her all too electrifying.
She kissed him slowly, carefully, melting against him in the process. At first he was hesitant, too confused and anxious to respond.
Had she not told him friends didn't kiss each other?
He couldn't make sense of her actions.
But right now, frankly, he didn't care. This was too good to be true.
And so his hands moved to the small of her back, holding on to her as he tilted his head and parted her lips with his.
A soft whimper left her, a sound that sent sparks flying through him. Her breasts were pressed against his chest, rubbing against him as if begging to be touched. His hands gripped her back tighter.
And then, without breaking the kiss, Lucy began to crawl into his lap.
He gasped quietly, a sound she swallowed up. Her legs settled on either side of him, hips rolling against his in a way that made the muscles in his stomach clench almost painfully.
But Lucy was the one in control of this, and he let her guide him, scared any unprodded movement or word could put an end to this.
The way she kissed him was almost too much to bear; there was so much soft desperation in every contact, so much emotion, accompanied by soft whimpers and even softer moans, as if she was pained by her actions.
Lucy's were the most amazing kisses of his life, nothing like anything he had known. He wondered just why that was; how she did it.
She sighed again, the sound vibrating into him, and prodded his mouth open with her tongue.
Despite himself, Natsu's hand tangled in her hair, pressing her into him as he deepened the kiss.
The small noises of delight that left her did weird things to him, and there was a fire burning in his belly that only she could quench.
But it was exactly this fire that became his undoing.
The proof of his desire pressed hard against her thigh, an automatic reflex that even the most innocent kisses could not quench. After all, for him, kissing was irrevocably connected with sex, and his conditioned response was all too clear. Unconsciously, he moved his hips to align them, craving the heat between her thighs.
Lucy sucked in a sharp breath.
Natsu silently cursed himself, realizing what he had done. Now he'd ruined everything. She would leave again. Send him away.
When she pulled back, he was prepared for the worst.
But she didn't say anything, even kept her eyes closed. But her face alone was full of emotions that made him clench his teeth in a kind of agony.
Her brows were furrowed, swollen lips pressed against each other. Before he could catch a glimpse at her eyes, however, she buried her face against his neck.
Her breathing was regular, slowing down, and he allowed himself to calm too. However, the knot in his stomach pulled tight. Caution and wariness rose in him.
Was this what she wanted to do? Kiss him out of the blue, and then regret it right after?
A pathetic part of him was okay even with that. But he had his dignity and pride.
Would she apologize again, when she pulled back? Was he a mistake?
They stayed silent for a while, Lucy not moving from her spot.
Her hands played with the collar of his shirt.
It would have been nice, to stay like this, if the atmosphere had not been so loaded. Both of them were unsettled from what had happened between them, albeit for different reasons.
Natsu watched Tarzan free Jane from a cage, almost laughing at the irony. The quiet, humourless laugh that shook his body was enough to finally stir Lucy.
She pulled back, biting that damned lip of hers.
"You're sorry, huh," he said, sparing her the struggle of saying it herself.
Her mouth dropped open. "Natsu…"
"I thought you said you didn't want to kiss me anymore," he dead-panned, guard somewhat up.
"I just…" Lucy tried, desperate to somehow convey her feelings to him. "That's not true. I want to kiss you. Just because I can't be with you like that, it doesn't mean I don't want to. It's just… really confusing. I want to kiss you all the time. But…"
Her voice trailed off, soft and hopeless.
"It's okay, I get it," he cut her off before she could go on. "You don't wanna talk about it. I can do that, y'know. Not ask questions. Never asked any before."
His voice was gruff, and her eyes widened in shock and understanding.
"No, Natsu, that's not-" she begged, but he turned his head.
The silence that fell was heavy and uncomfortable.
Lucy bit her lip again.
"I don't think you can be in a relationship right now," she spoke after a moment, brutally honest, "because you don't know what one is. Natsu, I know you don't understand me, but that's exactly the problem. You have so much to learn. And not all of that will be pleasant. You know, the way you… the service, it's not normal."
Lucy closed her mouth again, searching for a way to continue, but finding none.
Natsu furrowed his brows. But he could feel the blunt honesty of her words, and could appreciate it for what it was even if the words stung, and confused him.
"I want to kiss you," she repeated, "but I want more than that."
His eyes widened, and he was about to tell her he could give her that, anything she wanted, because it was the one thing he was good at besides fighting, when she shook her head as if he had just proven her point.
"That's not what I mean," she whispered, and the distinct pain in her eyes hurt him too. He didn't want to hurt her.
The sad look in her eyes didn't yield when she moved closer again, pressing the softest kiss against his lips. She pulled back with a sense of finality.
"We can't do this," she said. "Not...yet."
There was hope in her eyes, and the promise of something, of a possibility awaiting. This look alone finally was able to spark hope in Natsu's chest.
She did want to be with him, did she not? Just not right now. Like this. And while he didn't quite understand, Natsu was determined to find out what was holding her back. He could learn whatever she wanted him to learn.
The faintest of smiles tugged at the corners of his mouth, eyes lighting up with hope.
"Not yet," he repeated, and watched her nod with a small smile, tinged with hope much like his own. She remained in his lap, cuddling up against him with a sigh.
This was good enough for him.
Savor these moments now, because something unfortunate may happen...
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Next time! Chapter 25: Haymaker