A/N: And so here is chapter sixteen. Red finds out that Lizzie is far from being fine. Thanks again for all the follows and reviews. I really, really appreciate it. Thank you also for hanging in there. This story is long from finished. There is quite a road ahead of them with many ups and downs. I hope you'll stay tuned.

Chapter sixteen

It was the end of their day at the beach. Red had taken Abby back home again, but promised to be back in the evening to take Lizzie out to dinner. He'd picked Lizzie up from her house and they'd gone to a nice small restaurant. Because of the nice weather they could still sit outside and so they did. The restaurant had a nice view over the ocean and it wasn't too busy.

"Abby couldn't stop talking about you." Red said. His hands itched to touch Lizzie. He wanted to have her in his arms and never let go again. Though that feeling had always been strong, after their embrace this afternoon it had only gotten stronger.

"She's a sweetheart." Lizzie smiled.

Red nodded his agreement. "Thank you for making this easier. I know it's been hard on you."

Lizzie looked down at the table. It was important for her to make it easier for him, to have him share the burden. But that didn't mean that it was easy on her. She needed more from him. Though she was doing a lot better since his return, she knew all too well that she still wasn't there yet. And she needed him to get back to herself again.

He reached out to cover her hand with his. He played with her fingers for a moment hoping she would share her thoughts. When she didn't it showed him that there was still so much to deal with. He blamed himself for her unwillingness to talk. Knowing Lizzie like he did, he knew she would put her own needs aside for Abby's and Angela's. He needed her to tell him when she needed him. He wasn't a mind reader. "Lizzie." He said, hoping she would look at him. When she didn't, he tried again. "Lizzie, please look at me." After he had her attention he continued. "It's okay to be selfish, Lizzie. It's okay to say to me that you need me. I…" He looked past her for a few seconds. "I want you to need me, just like I need you. I know you don't want to be the reason I can't spend time with my brother's family. But I don't want you to push aside your own needs and feelings."

She nodded at his words, but kept her eyes downcast. It was difficult for her to ask more of him when she knew what he was dealing with. "I don't know if I can."

"Why?"

"Because you're clearly needed somewhere else and I…" She paused and didn't continue.

"You…what?" He asked softly.

"I don't want you to feel obligated to be with me." She was afraid that he did.

He was glad she'd finally admitted what was really bothering her. "You will never be an obligation to me. Never." He said it with such conviction. He lifted her head with his finger under his chin. "I will always want to be with you, sweetheart. Only you." When he saw his words were getting through to her, he continued. "But I need you to tell me what you need or when you need me. I will do my best to make time for you. I may not be able to be there right away, but I will be there." He waited for her to respond, but she didn't. It frustrated him. His Lizzie was stubborn and that wasn't always easy. "Promise me, Lizzie."

She shook her head. She really didn't know if she could promise him. She didn't want to be the one who kept him from his family.

At that moment he hated it that they were at a public place. He didn't quite understand what she was saying or better yet refused to say. She wanted to be with him, she needed him. That much was clear but she was unwilling to accept his words and feelings. "Lizzie." He said, his voice without his usual warmth. He bit the inside of his cheek. They were going to talk and they were going to do so now. Standing up, he held out his hand for her to take.

"What?" Lizzie questioned him.

"We're going to talk." He said seriously.

"But…" Lizzie wanted to say they had to wait for their dinner.

"No." He signalled for her to take his hand. She finally did so. On their way outside, he told the waiter to hold their food until they were back.

Standing outside, Red pulled Lizzie close, holding both her hands in his. "I don't know what to do to make you believe that it is okay for you to need me. What's holding you back?" He couldn't keep the hurt and anger from his voice. Getting through to Lizzie was always difficult.

"I don't know."

"Don't…" His body trembled. He was trying hard to stay calm. "You know, Lizzie. You know. Don't do this to us." It was time to push her. "I can't do this on my own. I love you Elizabeth. I want to be with you. I want to share my life with you. But I cannot do this on my own. Your unwillingness to share will destroy what we have. Is that what you want?"

"No." She whispered. She pulled her hands out of his and stepped back. She was shaking due to the turmoil his words caused her. He'd told her he loved her. For her it came out of nowhere. She didn't know how to react to that. She wasn't even sure she believed it. She looked at him with tears in her eyes. "I'm afraid that you will resent me for needing you in my life." A single tear slid down her cheek. "I am afraid that I'll need you too much. I'm afraid you'll leave me again." She took a shuddering breath. "I'm afraid I'll get so lost again that I won't find my way back." The tears flowed freely now. The crying made her whole body shake.

"Sweetheart." Red whispered before pulling her into his arms and holding her close. It broke his heart to see her in such pain. He was glad she finally shared her fears, but it made him realise how much she depended on him and how much they still had to deal with. These last few days she'd clearly put up a front. Her positive and understanding attitude were a lie and she was using his situation as a cover. She wasn't okay and she felt the need to hide it all from him. When he felt her calm down he gently extracted Lizzie's hands from his body and took a step back. As he did so he saw she immediately wanted to close the distance again.

"We have to work on your sharing. I don't want to push you like this every time, okay?" He said, looking her in the eyes.

"Yeah." She agreed in a soft voice.

He quickly pulled her in for a short hug again. "Let's go back inside and enjoy our dinner."

TBC