A/N: Thank you all for the reviews. Last chapter's was all about Lizzie, this chapter is all about Red and how he's dealing with it. I hope you enjoy this chapter too. I appreciate each and every review.
Chapter thirty-seven
He knew where Lizzie was. He'd known the first day after she'd left so suddenly. He'd quickly found out what had happened, what Angela had said to her. He'd made himself clear to Angela and knew without a doubt something like this would never happen again. He would not easily forgive Angela for what she'd done, but in the end he had to think of Abby too and it would do Abby no good if she could feel the effect of their strained relationship.
He'd tried calling Lizzie several times, but had given up when she refused to answer. He was not going to chase her. The fact that she believed Angela and not even had the decency to talk to him had in a way shattered his belief in what he thought they had. He simply couldn't believe it. Lizzie should have known better. He did not understand where her distrust came from. He was sure he had not given her any reason at all to doubt his intentions.
Lizzie however had done what she'd kept doing. She'd drawn her conclusions and once again not talked to him. She hadn't shared her feelings. By now if she was unwilling to share her thoughts and feelings, then clearly she would never do it. Apparently he was alone in his feelings and it hurt him deeply. He had declared his love for her, yet she had never done the same. He'd thought because she wasn't ready yet. But now he wondered if maybe she hadn't done so because she simply did not feel the same. Maybe he'd been wrong the entire time by thinking his future was with her.
He didn't know what was going to happen now. He didn't know when Lizzie was going to come back. His stuff was still at her place. At some point he was going to have to pick it up. He would do so when he knew she was back. For now he focused his attention on Abby. At night he lay awake. He hardly slept because when he closed his eyes he saw her. When he dreamed he dreamed of her. He dreamed of what could have been and always woke up feeling as if his heart had been ripped out of his chest. It was the same pain he'd felt after he'd lost his daughter. Back then he'd vowed to himself to never be that vulnerable again, yet Lizzie had made him break that promise. And here he was, broken again.
"Uncle Ray?" Abby's small voice came from living room.
Red left the kitchen and joined his niece in the living room. "Yes, Abby." He sat down on the floor next to Abby where she was playing with her dolls.
"When can we visit aunt Lizzie again?"
Her question didn't surprise him. It surprised him more that it had taken this long. He knew how much Abby liked Lizzie. She'd grown attached to her already. "I don't know."
"I miss her." She let go of her dolls and crawled into her uncle's lap.
"Me too."
Abby threw her little arms around her uncle's neck and put her head on his shoulder. "Is that why you're sad?"
"Yes it is honey."
They both were silent. Abby's sweet hug did comfort him. His niece was very precious and he loved her dearly. He turned his head and kissed cheek.
"I miss Jethro too." She also said.
Abby let go of her uncle sat down on his lap again. She lay her head against his chest. "Is she mad at us?" She asked in a small voice.
Red ran his hand over Abby's blond curls. He always told her the truth. "She's mad at me, not you."
Abby was silent again, as if she was contemplating her uncle's words. "I don't like it that aunt Lizzie makes you sad." After a few minutes the little girl left her uncle's lap to grab her dolls before taking her place again in his lap. She played quietly for a while, but clearly the subject of Lizzie was still on her mind. "Do you love aunt Lizzie?"
Yes he did and he knew he would always love her even if they would not be together. "I do." He said softly to his niece who seemed to observe him closely.
Abby once pulled herself up until she could kiss her uncle's cheek to comfort him. "I don't want you to leave, uncle Ray."
"I'm not going anywhere, honey." He reassured her. Ever since Abby lost her father she was afraid that people were going to leave her.
"But aunt Lizzie promised she wouldn't leave but she did."
Maybe it had been a mistake to let Abby and Lizzie meet. Even though the two were very fond of each other. Lizzie's sudden absence was not good for Abby. It angered him. Lizzie should have known better. She knew what Abby had gone through, yet she didn't seem to care. "I promise you, I'll never leave you Abby."
"You promise?" Her lower lip trembled as if she was afraid he was going to deny her promise.
"I promise, honey." He pulled her up and gave her a big hug. "I'll always be here." Looking down at her he saw she was no longer sad and knew she believed him. He looked outside. It was beautiful weather. It would do them both good to get out of the house. "How about we go to the playground?"
Abby jumped up and smiled brightly. "Yes!"
He laughed at her, happy to see her bright smile again. When he saw that smile, he saw his brother. At times like that he missed his brother terribly and wished he was there to see his little girl. But it also made him more determined to keep his promise to take care of them.
TBC...