A/N: Hello my darlings, I would like to report that I am very much still alive! I am also, unfortunately, very busy with school, but I received a review not too long ago that reminded me that some many people are waiting to read the next chapter of this story and so I am hoping I can deliver! Please bear with me, it's been a while since I've written.

Chapter Six: I Don't Blame You

A moment of silence passed through the room before Komaki sighed and lifted his head to meet Tezuka's confused gaze. "Tezuka, this morning, Dojo and Kasahara had plans to eat breakfast at a diner in town, to celebrate her birthday."

"Dojo was going to propose to Kasahara."

17:46

"Alright man, does anyone have any questions?"

Dojo felt his eyes drifting towards the clock once again.

17:47

He felt ridiculous, like a kid eagerly waiting for school to let out so he could run home and play outside. However, it wasn't home that he would run to now, but to the hospital - to her.

"Sir! Yes, sir!"

17:48

"Alright then, report directly to me or Dojo if you come across anything important. Dismiss!"

Dojo bolted to his feet, grabbed his bag off the floor and made for the door as quickly as he could. However, just as he was crossing the threshold, a large hand clamped onto his shoulder and dragged him back into the briefing room.

Dojo growled inwardly, silently cursing the captain as he led back to the front of the room where the rest of the squad was standing.

"Sorry, Dojo. I know you want to be the rush to the hospital, but we need to talk." Genda said calmly as he steered the Sergeant Major down the stairs.

At the bottom of the stairs stood Komaki and Tezuka, patiently waiting for their comrade to join them. It felt strange not seeing Kasahara at his side, especially when he looked so incredibly annoyed.

"Chief, visiting hours end at 20:00, we can always talk about this in the morning," Komaki offered. He had been sitting next to Dojo during the entire meeting and had seen his eyes drift towards the clock on more than one occasion. Komaki also understood what it was likely to desperately want nothing more than to be at the side of the woman he loved when she needed him most. He truly sympathized for Dojo, having seen his relationship with Kasahara grow over the years, they were by far one his favorite couples.

"No can do, Komaki. Maki will be here in the morning to give us the details, but I want to give you all a heads-up beforehand." Genda responded, releasing Dojo's shoulders and moving to stand in front of the three soldiers.

"Sir, does this have anything to do with the investigation on Kasahara's accident?" Tezuka asked, glancing sideways at Dojo, whose shoulders instantly stiffened.

A dark look passed over the captain's face and complete silence filled the room.

"Yes, Maki has spoken to a few witnesses and the police have opened an official investigation." Genda let out a heavy sigh before making eye contact with Dojo. "I'm sorry Dojo, but I don't think Kasahara's situation is by any means an accident."

"It looks so beautiful outside," Iku said softly, turning her head slightly towards the window, the thick green curtains swaying slightly as the autumn breeze swept through the open window of her hospital room.

Beside her, a nurse hummed quietly as she re-bandaged Iku's arm. Iku winced when she felt one of the old gauze pads cling and pull at her scraped skin.

"Sorry, dear," apologized the nurse as she quickly cleaned the reopened wound before covering it with a new bandage. "Look on the bright side, though; if you don't touch them, we should be able to take these off for good in a couple of days."

Iku smiled slightly at the woman. This nurse, Miyako, was Iku's favorite because she spent time talking to Iku and always told her wonderful stories about her grandchildren, pictures included. In some ways, Miyako reminded Iku a little of her own mother, only calmer and more easy-going. Granted, Iku wasn't sure how Miyako would have dealt with a rebellious, tomboy of a daughter, either.

Iku glanced out the window once more, thinking of her mother made her entire body heavy with guilt. Her parents deserved to know that she was in the hospital, but she feared that her mother would force her to be transferred to a hospital back home. It broke her heart to keep her condition a secret from her family, especially since her mother had called her the evening of her birthday.

"Happy birthday, Iku!" That was what she had heard the moment she answered the phone. Her parents and her brothers all wishing her a happy birthday. Unfortunately, her birthday was a less-than-happy occasion for everyone. She had been in an accident and it worried the people around her to death. It was the first time that she'd heard of Shibazaki crying. It was the first time she'd been in so much pain, both physical and emotional pain.

It had been two weeks since her accident, but despite some of the healing cuts and scratches, Iku was still feeling pretty worse for wear. It didn't help that she hadn't had a single chance to go outside, not even in a wheelchair. Instead, she was forced to stay in bed and listen to the sounds of the outdoors and gaze out her window at the rapidly falling leaves. She had the pleasure of watching them fall and paint the dying grass in vibrant shades of red, orange, and gold.

Iku shifted slightly on the bed to get a better view of the courtyard outside her window when a jolt of pain shot up the right side of her body. Iku's right hand flew to the railing of the bed and she gripped it until her knuckles turned white, despite the searing pain it caused in her right wrist. A sharp gasp escaped her lips as her entire body tensed for several torturously long seconds.

"Now, why would you do that?" Scolded Miyako as she moved across the room to help Iku back into a less-painful position on the bed. "You know you aren't supposed to be moving around so much."

"Sorry, I had an itch." Iku fibbed quietly, shrinking a little under Miyako's hard stare.

"An itch to get out of that bed perhaps," Miyako said with a huff as she proceeded to water the flowers sitting on the windowsill of Iku's hospital room. "Your boyfriend was so sweet to bring you such beautiful flowers."

"Oh, Miyako-san, he's not-" Iku made an attempt to correct the woman, but the grandmother kept chatting.

"Speaking of which, I haven't seen him yet today. He usually comes to see you after work, no?" Miyako chirped as she pruned the bouquet of chamomiles.

"'Strength in difficult times.'"

Both women turned their attention towards the door, a smile spreading across their faces at the sight of the Sergeant Major standing in the doorway, a small carry-out bag hanging from his fingers.

"Speak of the devil!" Miyako grinned and sent Iku a wink before scurrying out of the room to give the couple some time alone before visiting hours ended.

"Good evening, Subaru-san." Dojo greeted politely as the middle-aged nurse slipped past him.

"You're late, Sergeant Major Dojo." Miyako scolded lightly, smiling gently when the man laughed sheepishly. "Well, at least you're here now, have a nice evening!"

Dojo watched the nurse make her way down the hall before turning towards Iku and smiling.

"Hey," he said gently as he stepped into the room and quietly closed the door behind him. "I brought food."

Iku smiled at him as he approached the side of her hospital bed. Dojo carefully set the food on the side table before setting up the tray attached to Iku's bed. Iku watch the soldier's quiet movements, it was the first time he'd come to visit her while still in uniform. Perhaps he hadn't wanted her to feel sad for not being able to be at the library. Perhaps he hadn't wanted her to miss the Task Force or feel guilty for being bedridden. Either way, as Dojo set the food on the tray, Iku couldn't help but whisper.

"Thank you, Atsushi."

Dojo looked up and smiled slightly before gently taking her left hand interlocking their fingers.

"Of course." He whispered back, gently raising her hand to his lips.

Iku smiled and briefly forfeited Dojo's hand so that he could finish setting up the food he'd brought for the two of them.

Frankly, Iku didn't care what food Dojo had brought because it smelled divine compared to the hospital she'd been eating for the past week. So, when her wonderful visitor opened the three Styrofoam containers to reveal tempura, yakitori, and tonkatsu, Iku's eyes grew with delight and she let out a soft squeal. Her companion couldn't help but chuckle at the sheer amount of glee emanating for the twenty-three-year-old sitting in front of him.

"Excited?" He asked teasingly. Iku sent him a half-hearted glare and pouted cutely.

"Don't make fun of me!" She exclaimed when Dojo started to laugh at her sour expression. The blond pointed a rather annoyed finger at the onyx-eyed soldier," How would you like to sit in a bed and eat hospital food day in and day out?"

As soon as the words left her mouth, Iku wished that she could take them back. The playful gleam in Dojo's eyes had instantly disappeared the moment he remembered why she was sitting in that hospital bed and his mind began to swim with self-loathing thoughts.

Iku reached out and gently touched Dojo's wrist, freeing him from the tormenting guilt that was running through his mind. "I'm sorry," she said gently, "I didn't mean to make you feel bad."

Dojo looked down at the young woman and shook his head.

"This guilt is something that will stay with me for a long time. No matter how many times you say it is not my fault, I should have been there to stop you," Dojo tore his gaze from Iku and stared down at the blue hospital sheets, "to protect you."

"Idiot."

Dojo's head snapped up to look at Iku, astonished by her bluntness. Sure, Iku had always been one to speak her mind, but this was certainly a first.

"Excuse me?"

"I said," Iku hissed, "that you're an i-di-ot."

Her brown eyes narrowed as she glared at Dojo. "This," Iku growled as she gestured to her hospital room, "has absolutely nothing to do with you."

Dojo opened his mouth to argue, but Iku beat him to it.

"I chose to go for a run that morning. I chose to meet you for breakfast. I chose to turn around. You did not do this to me. You are not the person who hit me. So, don't you dare act like this is your fault, that you are the reason that I am here!"

"Iku, I-" Dojo started, but Iku cut him off.

"I am sick and tired of hearing you apologize for something you didn't do. I don't blame you, so why are you blaming yourself-"

Dojo felt his hands ball into fists at his sides before he let one slam down on top of the bedside table.

"Because I promised your parents that I would keep you safe, Iku! That's why I blame myself! They trusted me to protect you, and I failed!" Dojo snapped, hot anger pumping through his veins as he made eye contact with the young woman sitting in the bed beside him. "I blame myself... because I wasn't there when you needed me most."

Dojo ripped his gaze from Iku and stared hard at the toes of combat boots as the memories of her accident came rushing back into his mind.

"All I could do was sit and watch hopelessly as you laid there on the street... covered... in blood. I-I tried to go to you, I wanted so desperately to go to you, but I couldn't move. My body just would not move... because I was scared." Dojo felt his chest tighten and he clenched his hands into fists, his fingernails digging into the flesh of his palm as he felt panic and hopelessness overtake him once again. "There was nothing... nothing that I could do to help you. Nothing I could say and hope for to turn back time and prevent it from happening. I was so... so... so scared that I was going to... to lose you. I was too scared to move, and I hate myself for being such a coward."

Dojo could feel tears burn in his eyes and he turned away from Iku, unable to bring himself to face her in the state that he was in.

Several moments of silence passed between them before Iku took a deep breath and spoke.

"Please don't turn away from me." She said quietly, almost as a whisper, but in the silent hospital room, Dojo had heard it.

And he turned around.

What Dojo saw hit him hard and sat down heavily in the chair beside Iku's bed.

She was crying for him - because he refused to cry in front of her.

Dojo sat quietly as she cried, unable to bring himself to say a single word. He simply sat and stared at the blue sheets that covered her long legs. It was already long past visiting hours, but Dojo couldn't bring himself to leave Iku's side, not like this. So, once she had calmed down, Dojo handed her a pair of chopsticks and they quietly ate their cold dinner. When they finished, Dojo gathered their trash and threw it away before returning to his seat beside Iku.

Dojo glanced at his watch and sighed. It was nearly midnight and they'd hardly spoken to each other in the past few hours. Normally, Dojo would have asked the nurses if he could stay the night with Iku, but he didn't feel it would appropriate this time, especially after everything that had just happened. Perhaps it would be best if they gave each other some space.

With a soft sigh, Dojo rose from his chair and grabbed his bag. He glanced back at Iku, hoping she'd look up to bid him farewell, but she kept her head low and her gaze focused on the hands in her lap. Dojo let out another sigh and turned towards the door. Placing his hand on the knob, Dojo carefully opened the door and called to Iku over his shoulder.

"I'm heading out now. Let me know if there is anything you need, okay?"

He caught Iku giving him the faintest of nods before turning back to exit the room. However, just Dojo was closing the door behind him, he heard Iku speak.

"Atsushi..." She said softly as she lifted her head to look Dojo in the eyes.

"Yes, Iku?"

"Tomorrow... could you tell me... about our time together?"

HELLO, my darlings! I can't believe it's been almost a year since I last updated this story. I am home from college for the summer, so I have some free time. I've decided to try and get some writing in amongst the summer classes and my crazy hectic life.

I also just realized that this story has been going on for nearly 5 years and I've only published 6 chapters.

**Falls to my knees and begs for forgiveness from my readers**

I can't make any promises about when the next chapter will be up, but I can promise that I haven't given up on this story. The next chapter will be longer with Dojo telling Iku about some of the crazy adventures they have gone on together. I hope you all enjoy it!

(Also, I know Dojo and Iku may be a little OOC in this, but hey, they love each other, she was just in an accident and has amnesia, and he is losing his mind over the amount of guilt he feels, soooooooo yeah.)

Anyways, as always,

Read it, love it, follow it and review it!

It's so nice to be back!

~Smash

(P.S. The only reason Iku tried to deny that she and Dojo are dating is because she doesn't really remember Dojo. Trust me, though, that are, indeed a couple in this fanfic!)