Pie Day
Age: Sixteen
Two warriors faced off in the middle of the dojo.
On one side stood Mikey, kusarigama in hand with a confident smile splayed across his face.
And on the other side stood none other than Master Splinter himself, an equally confident smile shining underneath his whiskers.
"Are you ready, my son?" asked Splinter.
Mikey raised his blade.
"Bring it on!"
Splinter smiled as he raised his hand revealing his weapon of choice: An entire carton…of blueberries.
"Hajime!"
Splinter took one step forward as he began firing the blueberries towards Mikey the exact same way he would throw a set of throwing stars.
Mikey was ready.
As the blue projectiles soared towards the orange clad ninja he quickly swung his blade as fast as he possibly could, the sharpened steel of the kusarigama slicing through the tiny targets with as much precision and accuracy as he could muster.
The onslaught continued for what felt like hours but in reality spanned only a few minutes as the two halves of each berry fell into a set of large bowls on either side of the turtle.
When the last berry was sliced Mikey stood panting in the middle of the dojo, his arms tired but a triumphant grin still spread across his face.
Splinter smiled, a warm glow of pride warming his chest. Though his youngest child was an extremely dedicated and gifted ninja, when it came to volunteering for extra training he tended to prefer skate boarding or comic books to perfecting his ninja arts. But today was different.
Today was Pie Day.
Pie Day was a tradition that his children had started when they were seven. One day in March Donatello, who was by that time studying middle school level lessons on math and science thanks to his Detective Beaker books, mentioned to his brothers that there was a mathematical term known as "Pi," the ratio of the circumference to the diameter of a circle.
Leonardo and Raphael couldn't have cared less, as would be expected from a pair of seven year olds, but Michelangelo was enthralled by the concept. Not because of any love of math or numbers, but because the mathematical term pi sounded exactly like the dessert pie.
He had asked Donatello numerous questions about the number, mostly to see if there were more dessert numbers out there, and after he found out that the value of pi was 3.14, he declared that every March 14th (Or the 14th day of the 3rd month) would be known as Pie Day, a day where together he and his entire family would make and eat pies.
At first his brothers had just gone along with it for the pie, but as the years past Pie Day became an important family tradition, one that Splinter looked forward to almost as much as Michelangelo. The family would spend the whole day preparing, and that night Splinter and his children would gather together in the kitchen to make delectable Pie Day treats. And since Michelangelo was the best cook of the family, he would always lead the preparations with all the dedication and artistry of a professional chef.
"How'd I do?" asked Mikey as he stood triumphantly over the bowls of chopped blue berries.
Splinter walked over to the bowls and started looking over the berries. This berry exercise was just the latest in Michelangelo's Pie Day training. Every March Splinter had the joy of seeing his normally free spirited son take on a dedication to training that almost rivaled that of Leonardo. He would spend hours researching new recipes and culinary techniques, and once he had decided on his recipes he would train himself to be able to accomplish them with both precision and flair. And whether he was strengthening his arms to knead dough, improving his speed to whisk batter, or, as in this case, practicing his blade work for chopping ingredients, Splinter was always there to help him. A little father/son bonding time that the ninja master cherished more than all the pies in the world.
Splinter looked up from the berries.
"24 whole. 163 chopped."
Mikey pumped his fist in the air.
"Booyakasha! A new record!"
"Well done, my son." said Splinter. "Blueberries are a most difficult target to master given their small size."
"Thanks Master Splinter. I want everything to be perfect for Pie Day this year. I've got this sweet family theme planned out. A blueberry pie for Leo, a raspberry pie for Raph, a mulberry pie for Donnie, an orange meringue pie for yours truly, and for you, my latest invention: a pie filled with eight different kinds of cheese wrapped inside a mozzarella infused crust. I call it 'The Cheesanator!'"
Splinter could feel the saliva pooling in his mouth at his son's description.
"I am sure it shall be the best Pie Day yet." said Splinter. "Now come. Let us fetch your brothers."
Mikey nodded. The two exited the dojo and walked towards the living room.
Inside the living room they saw Raph, Casey, Donnie, and Leonardo scattered about the room.
"What's up, bros?" asked Mikey cheerfully. "Better grab your chef hats, cause it's pie time! Raph, you can start—"
"No can do, pie for brains." said Raph. "Casey and I are heading to a pro hockey game."
"What?" asked Mikey, the smile disappearing from his face.
"I found this dope spot that Raph and I can hide in so he can actually watch the game." said Casey. "It's gonna be sweet!"
He and Raph high fived.
Mikey stared.
"But—"
"I'm afraid I'll have to skip it as well." said Donnie as he packed some books into a book bag. "April asked me to come over to her house to help her with her homework. Me! It'll be just her, me, and six text books worth of trigonometry."
The tall turtle sighed, hearts practically dancing in his eyes as he imagined himself and the girl of his dreams alone in a mathematical paradise.
Mikey stared, his heart practically breaking before Splinter's eyes.
"My sons." started Splinter. "Perhaps—"
Mikey quickly put on a smile.
"It's okay, sensei. Leo and I can—"
"Sorry, Mikey." said Leo as he slipped his katana onto his back. "There are rumors that the Purple Dragons are having a top secret meeting at their new hideout down by the pier, so I plan to do some recon and see if I can sneak in. It's just too important to pass up."
Mikey's shoulders sagged as he watched all three of his brothers preparing to leave.
"But Pie Day…"
"Sorry, Mikey." said Donatello. "We're just too old for Pie Day."
Raph, Casey, Donnie, and Leo all headed for the turnstiles.
"Later, Mikey!" shouted Casey.
Leo turned as he walked through the turnstiles.
"We'll bake pies some other time. I promise. Have fun you two!"
As Leo jogged out into the tunnels Mikey watched in complete despair, his Pie Day plans crumbling like a bad graham cracker crust.
"Go Ducks!"
Casey and Raph screamed their cheers, adding their encouragement to the roar of over a thousand other hockey fans.
The stadium was packed on all sides as the two teams down on the ice SLAMMED against each other, vying for control of the puck.
And where were Casey and Raph in all this?
Hidden waaaaay up in the rafters of the stadium, looking down on all the action from just above the scoreboard. They were far enough away so that no one in the stadium could see them, and close enough that they had a perfect bird's eye view of all the action.
One of the Ducks SLAMMED an opposing player into the glass.
"Yeah!" shouted Raph. "Man, this is awesome!"
"I know, right?" replied Casey. "This is Bone Crusher Bronson's last game before he retires. He holds the record for most bones broken by a single player."
Casey pointed to an extremely large man skating on the rink. Just as one of the opposing players went for the puck, Bronson TACKLED them into the wall reducing the poor soul to a crumpled heap of pain and misery on the ice rink.
Raph wiped his eye with a smile.
"It's a thing of beauty."
Raph's stomach growled.
"Woah." said Casey. "Are you hungry or is there a giant Kraang worm living in your stomach?"
Raph shoved Casey playfully.
"What do you think, genius?"
"No sweat." said Casey as he pulled up a large tote bag. "I brought hot dogs, popcorn, soda pop."
Raph waved it off.
"Nah. It's weird. It's like I'm hungry, but I don't know for what."
"Well, excuse me for not bringing the escargot."
Casey bowed like a maitre d', causing Raph to smack him on the head.
A whistle blew down below.
"Intermission, bro." said Casey. "Want me to go check out the snack stand for something more suited to your refined tastes?"
"Just give me a hot dog, and shut up." said Raph.
Casey tossed him a dog.
"Hello? Is this thing on?"
Casey and Raph both looked below as Bone Crusher Bronson stood in the penalty box holding a microphone.
The burly man smiled as he confirmed that the mic was indeed working.
"To all yous hockey fans out there. This has been a great season. I scored some goals, I broke some bones, and best of all I kicked major butt!"
The crowd cheered.
"Thank you. Thank you. As you know this is my last game. It's been an awesome journey these past twenty years. I could never a done what I done if it weren't for you guys. But most of all, I wanted to thank my family."
He pointed to the side of the stadium where a buff woman and two kids sat holding foam fingers.
"My family means everything to me. They supported me through the good. The bad. The times I ended up in the hospital, and the times I brought home the gold. I know I ain't always been there, but now that I'm retirin' I wanna be there for them as much as possible. This game's for you guys!"
The crowd roared their approval as Bronson raised the mic to his family on the side lines.
Casey clapped like a maniac.
"Man. Isn't he great?"
He turned to see Raph staring at Bronson in silence, his hot dog slowly starting to slip off the bun and into his lap.
"No, the secant needs to be in the second half of the equation."
"Donnie."
"Now if you take this number."
"Donnie."
"And put it here."
"Donnie!"
April huffed in frustration as Donnie finally stopped rambling about the equation in her text book.
"When I asked you to come over to help me with my homework, I wanted you to help me with my homework. Not do it for me."
"I know that, but if you'd just let me—"
"No!" April grabbed the pencil out of Donnie's hand. "No more pencil privileges for you."
"But April—"
"I said no! Don't make me take away your text book."
Donnie clammed up, sitting rigid in his chair as April gave him a warning glare.
The two held that pose for just a moment before they burst out laughing.
April wiped a tear from her eyes. "Uuuuh, I think it's time for a snack break. Be right back."
April got up from her chair and headed for the door.
Donnie waited until she was a good distance down the hallway before he made to grab for the pencil.
"And don't touch that pencil!"
Donnie quickly pushed away from the desk, his chair accidently tipping over in the process—
"Wah!"
-And causing the tall turtle to SLAM right onto April's bedroom floor.
He lay on the floor rubbing his head, one of April's socks plastered on his face.
April walked back in carrying two plates.
She eyed the strange scene with a smile.
"Okay there, Donnie?"
Donnie quickly popped up from the floor.
"What? Who? Me? Pfft. Perfect."
The sock slowly slid down his cheek. He quickly peeled it off and shoved it behind his back.
April laughed. She handed him a plate.
"Here."
Donnie looked at her with a wistful smile.
"Thanks, April."
He looked down at the plate.
His smile vanished.
"Pie?"
And indeed it was. There, sitting on the plate, was a single slice of strawberry pie topped with a dollop of whip cream.
"Of course." said April, digging in. "It is pi day."
Donnie's eyes shot to her.
"What?"
"You know? Pi day? March 14th?"
Donnie looked down at the pie.
"I thought only Mikey celebrated pie day?"
"Well, it's not like it's a big holiday or anything. It's just a fun day to eat pie." She swallowed a mouth full. "Now, hurry up and eat. We still have a lot of problems to go over."
April shoved another bite of pie in her mouth as Donnie's eyes remained glued to the plate.
Grrrrrrrrr.
"Shhhhh."
Leo lay down on a rooftop near the pier looking intently through a pair of binoculars. He had been in this basic position for hours. So far there hadn't been any unusual movement at the new, rumored headquarters of the Purple Dragons, but that didn't mean he was ready to give up.
Grrrrrrrrrrrrr.
His stomach however…
"Quiet!" Leo whispered to his stomach. "I just fed you an hour ago."
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
"Don't make me feed you one of Mikey's jalapeno and maple syrup pizzas. Because I will!"
Silence.
Leo smiled.
He looked back through his binoculars.
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
"Oh, come on!"
Leo got up and walked around, stretching his sore back. At least that body part wasn't giving him any trouble.
"Pie time! Pie time!"
Leo stopped mid-stretch.
He looked over the right side of the building he was sitting on and saw two little boys following after their father as he exited a nearby bakery.
"Is it blueberry?" asked one boy.
The father shook his head, a playful smile on his face.
"Chocolate?" asked the other boy.
"Nope." said the father. "I'm not letting either of you know what it is until we get home."
"As long as it's not rhubarb." said the first boy. The two brothers looked at each other.
"Eeeeewwwwwwwww!"
The brothers laughed at their simultaneous Eews before following after their dad.
Leo smiled wistfully after the family.
Slowly, he drew himself away from the family scene and peered back through his binoculars.
He froze.
There, in the distance, three cars were just pulling up to one of the warehouses.
Leo adjusted the focus on the binoculars as eight figures exited the cars.
"Purple Dragons." he said, noticing the tattoos on their arms.
The eight Purple Dragons marched into the building, making extra sure to close the door behind them.
It was now or never.
Leo put a hand to one of his katana, ready to sprint off and fulfill his mission.
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
Leo glanced down at his stomach.
He looked back towards the way the brothers and their father had gone, the sound of their laughter still echoing through the air.
Back at the lair Mikey and Splinter stood at the kitchen counter kneading some dough.
Mikey sighed.
Splinter watched his youngest son listlessly work the dough. The dough itself was a mess. What should have been a firm ball was a wet paste that clung to both the counter and Mikey's hands like a slimy glob of taffy.
Splinter had seen his youngest make a pie out of algae and worms that looked good enough to be the cover photo for a culinary magazine (minus the occasional worm sticking out), but this…
As Splinter watched his son's sad excuse for cooking one thing rang across his mind.
How badly he was going to punish his sons when they got home.
Oh, he wouldn't be overt about it. Noooooo. He would punish them without them even knowing. He could see it now. Leonardo, come let me show you how to throw someone across the room. Donatello, your arms are looking weak. How about a thousand push-ups to firm them up? Raphael, your moves seem to lack focus. I think eight hours of meditation should fix that.
As Splinter plotted more schemes to punish his children his hands ground into the ball of dough, his iron grip strangling the defenseless flour as if preparing for all the horrible things he would force his sons to endure.
Only when Mikey suddenly stopped kneading his own dough did Splinter snap out of his angry trance.
He watched as his son stared sadly at the ill-formed dough.
"My son?" asked Splinter.
Mikey sighed before he gathered the glob of floury goo in his hands, trudged across the kitchen, and dumped it into the trash can.
He stood stone still in the middle of the kitchen as Splinter stared on, helpless to fix the mess.
"I hope you do better than that for my pie."
Splinter and Mikey looked up to see none other than Raphael standing in front of the turnstiles with Casey standing behind him.
"Raph?" asked Mikey. "But…what about the game?"
"Eh, the game was lame."
"Are you kidding?!" asked Casey. "Bronson was just about to go head to head with Kazowski for the puck while Reily—Oof!"
Casey clutched his stomach after a not-so-subtle blow from Raph.
Mikey smiled.
"Hey, guys."
Mikey's head turned as Donnie and April came walking up behind Raph and Casey with two large bags of groceries in hand.
"Sorry we're late." said April.
"We stopped at the store for supplies." added Donnie. "I invited April to join us for Pie Day, and I figured with the extra person we'd need extra ingredients."
"I hope it's okay." said April. "Donnie told me how this was an important family tradition, and the last thing I'd want to do is barge in on you."
Mikey beamed.
"The more the merrier."
April smiled as she and Donnie headed towards the kitchen.
"Hope you saved room for me."
Everyone turned as Leo leapt over the turnstiles.
"I thought you were off hunting Purple Dragons." commented Raph as he helped unload the groceries.
"I was, but for some reason my stomach kept growling the entire time I was on stake-out. It made stealth next to impossible, sooo I decided to come back here. Hand me those strawberries."
Raph and Donnie gave him a knowing smile as he came over to help unload the groceries.
Mikey looked at the full kitchen, a gleaming smile spread across his face and a warm glow filling his chest like a billion rainbows of awesomeness.
Splinter smiled too, the shining light of a father's pride quickly snuffing out all thoughts of punishment from the rat sensei's mind.
"Well?" asked Raph as he turned toward Mikey. "You gonna help us cook, or do I have to bake these pies myself?"
"Please, say you'll help." said Donnie. "I don't think my stomach can take a Raph original."
Everyone laughed.
Mikey grinned and quickly wiped a small tear from his eye.
"Right. Let's get baking. Donnie and April, you're on crusts."
"Yes, chef." said April with a salute.
"Leo, Master Splinter, start dicing the ingredients. Raph and Casey, you're with me on fillings. Let's move it people!"
Everyone smiled as the kitchen whirled to life, the sound of clanging pans and laughing friends creating the perfect melody for the family's most perfect Pie Day.
Author's Note: Hi Hi Everyone!
A brand new chapter to start a brand new week! YAY! This chapter was sooo much fun to write. I'm a huge fan of the culinary arts, so getting to write an entire chapter centered around pies was a totally awesome treat! Out of curiosity, what are some of your favorite desserts?
Let me know what you thought of this latest chapter. Thank you so hyper much for reading, and, as always, have a hyper happy day! LOVE YOU GUYS~!