Mal, Wes, Del and Snape were driving down an old country road, with cornfields as far as the eye could see. The old battered vechicle gave a lurch and a loud bang and suddenly stopped.
Snape said to them. "I've got this under control." And got out of the car and lifted the hood up to inspect the innards of the car. "Oh no." Snape grumbled. "It looks like the musketeer fusion belt has busted. It'll take me at least a week to get it fixed."
"A week?" The three of them exclaimed in unison.
"What are we going to do for food?" Mal yelled. "And more importantly, how are we going to bath and go to the bathroom?!" Mal got out of the car and said angrily. "Ugh Snape, you're so unreliable."
Wes glared at Snape and got out too. "Yeah, we cant trust you at all. Ever since you've joined us everything has been going wrong."
"I disagree." Says Del. "Mal literally caused us to become homeless, I don't think he can do worse than that. However I remaind loyal to my brethren so..." She got out of the car too.
"Sit tight kiddos Ive got this sitch under control." Snape snaps his fingers and a small fire starts on the engine."Okay this might take longer than I thought."
Mal rolled his eyes. "Lets go guys."
"Wait!" Snape said looking distressed. "Where are you going?"
"For a walk." Wes said and Del put her finger up at Snape.
"But!" Snape cried. "Its dangerous! People have been rumoured to go missing around these parts at night!"
"Whatever." Del grumbled and the three of them departed into the corn fields, leaving Snape behind on the road.
They walked around for a few hours and it was starting to get dark in the sky above them. They were tired and their feet hurt. Not to mention hungry and filthy from when they stopped to have a mudfight.
"Maybe we should head back." Mal said nervously. "Its starting to get dark."
"You might be right." Wes said, shaking with fear. "But I dont remember the way back."
"Oh that's not good." Mal said thoughfully.
Del was staring up at the stars. "Its okay guys, my alien boyfriend taught me how to read the stars like a map, it shouldn't be long before we get back to the car."
Mal and Wes stared at Del.
"When did he teach you that?" Mal asked
"We communicate telepathically." Del explaied.
"Ooooh." Mal and Wes said in unison.
Del lead them through the cornfields and it was completely dark now, lit only by the light of the moon above them.
With each step Del seemed to be getting more and more unsure.
"The stars arent right..." She muttered. "If I didn't know any better... Id say they were... moving!"
Mal and Wes gasped.
"But, does that mean we're lost?!" Mal explained.
"Yes." Del sighed unhappily. "And theres another poissibility."
"What is it?" Wes asked.
"I think someone is playing tricks on us." She said angrily. "but to do something as elaborate as moving the stars to trick us? they must be an institutional mastermind."
Something rustled in the corn stalks nearby and Wes screamed and sprinted away.
"Wait! We have to stay together Wes!" Del shouted but it was too late, they were already gone. "Mal we have to stick toge-"
Mal had already run away and Del rolled her eyes.
The three of them ran as far as they could from the rustling and eventually all of them came out at the same clearing in the cornfield.
"Is this a crop circle?" Wes asked.
"I don't think so." Del said. "It looks too mathmatical."
There was a rustle from beyond the clearing and a cackling laughter.
"Right you are, young Delaphenia."
"How do you know my name?" Del glared as the tall figure emerged into the clearing.
It was a handsome man wearing a green millitary suit. He had slicked back brown hair and dark blue eyes.
"My name is General Tango, and I think I know just the place for you three." He smiled evilly.
"We're our you taking us?" Wes questioned, looking up and down at General Tango's body.
"To a millitary operations camp that we use to train up young'uns like you lot."
"How long will we be there?" Mal asked checking his calendar. "We have a schedule to stick to and Im not sure we can afford to make another detour like this."
General Tango shrugged and then put handcuffs on them.
"Ooh kinky." Del said as he put the cuffs on her.
General Tango then led them through the cornfield and eventually they reached the edge of the field and then they were at the entrance to a forest. Mal shivered and the general took them deep into the forest. Eventually they saw a wall made out of logs, like a summer camp. Inside there were some log cabins.
The enterance was locked with a padlock but General Tango let them through and locked the door behind them.
"This is we're you'll be training for the next five years to serve as disposable cia agents." General Tango explained as he led us to a dirty log cabin.
Mal pulled out his calender again and frowned. "Yeah that's not going to work for us."
"Mal this isn't optional we're being kidnapped." Del said.
General Tango removed our handcuffs and pointed at a large building nearby. "Thats the cafeteria. You can come and eat when you've settled in."
Wes opened the door first and made a digusted noise. "Ugh there's mould in here. I call top bunk!"
Wes dashed over to the bunk beds and tried to climb up but they were not strong and could not climb up so they dropped to the floor in a panting heap.
Del and Mal laughed and then tried to climb into the top bunk but they also became out of breath and fell down on top of Wes.
"Wow maybe this army camp will do us some good." Mal suggested.
Del looked around. There were two bunk beds.
Did that mean they had a fourth roomate?
Then she looked at the bed and sure enough there was a teenage boy laying on the bottom bunk of one of the bunk beds.
"Hey." Del said as she got up. "What are you reading?"
The boy glared at her. "Just leave me alone."
Wes looked over too and said. "Whats your name?"
The boy grumbled and looked angry
Mal asked. "Whats your name."
"Malcom."
"Hey Malcom." They all said. "We're Mal Wes and Del."
"I need to use the can." Wes said and walked into the bathroom.
Mal watched Wes suspiciously and after a few minutes Mal and Del busted down the door.
Malcom gasped and Mal and Del stared at Wes as they brushed their teeth.
"What?" Wes said confused.
"Oh nothing." Mal said.
Malcom rolled his eyes. "Great, now the toilet door is broken."
The four of them went over to the cafeteria for dinner and when they walked in it was like a zoo. People were shouting and eating strange grey slop.
"Ew gross, what are they eating?" Del asked.
"It's unidentified mass night," Malcom explained. "Oh boy, its my favourite."
Mal winked at them and said. "Don't worry, I'll get us some real food. I know a guy."
The four of them lined up with their trays, Malcom eagerly anticipating his unidentified mass.
When they got to the food lady Mal leaned over the counter with a smug face and said. "Hey Im a friend of Steves. You think we could get some real food?"
The lady suddenly looked terrified and muttered to her friend. "Go out the back and get the good stuff, he's a friend of Steves."
The other lady also looked terrified and scurried into the corner to get the food for them.
Malcom looked confused when solid food went onto his tray but he shrugged and walked to a table to eat it anyway.
The three of them ate and then they went back to their log cabin.
They all got into their beds and slept with their hands under their cheeks like in the praying hands.
In the morning General Tango walked into their log cabin and screamed at them to wake up.
"ALL OF YOU COCKROACHES GET YOURSELF DOWN TO THE TRAINING FIELD. IF YOU WANT BREAKFAST THEN YOU BETTER FINISH YOUR EXERCISES."
Del Mal and Malcom shot out of the door instantly but Wes got up slowly and strutted over to General Tango.
"Hey." Wes winked.
"Why is the toilet door broken?" General Tango asked and Wes laughed.
"Haha. Dont worry about that. So tell me about yourself." Wes fluttered their eyelashes and General Tango blushed.
"Uhm, like what?" He said shyly.
"How did you get into this line of work?" Wes said slowly and deliberatly as they grinned menacingly.
General Tango felt threatened and began to sutter.
"I think. " Wes continued. "You look much better on stage."
General Tango froze. "How did you know about that."
"I know lots of things General Tango," Wes winked. "Or should I say... Sensei Dorito?"
General Tango glared. "If you tell anybody-"
Wes cut him off with a chuckle. "Oh, Tango, m'boy, I have no interest in telling anybody."
General Tango looked at them with narrow eyes. "What do you want?"
"Just your body."
"What?"
"Lets dance."
"You know salsa dance?" General Tango looked at Wes suspiciously.
Wes laughed and said "Señorita." in a way that implied they were saying "duh."
Wes strutted over to General Tango whispered. "Lets dance." seductively.
Del Mal and Malcom arrived at the training fields and they began to run around it and they were sweating and crying.
"Hey where is Wes?" Del asked.
"I don't know." Malcom said.
Mal laughed and said. "Haha, they must be running so fast that nobody can see them."
"Oh yeah I forgot Wes could do that." Del laughed.
Wes danced sensually with General Tango and eventually they knew they had to part.
"Can I kiss you?" General Tango asked shyly.
Wes shrugged. "Sure whatever."
Then they made out passionately.
please review :)
xoxo- wet