Mal, Wes and Del woke up in their bunks on the second day of training camp with cramps and unknown bruise.
"Oh boy" Mal said, sitting up and rubbing his hand on the back of his neck "My neck is so painful."
Del responded with an agonising moan. Mal looked down from the bunk into Wes' but they were'nt there.
"Hey, Del." Mal asked "Where's Wes? Did they come back last night?"
Before Del could open her mouth, the door to their cabin opened wide and in came Wes.
"Good morning, guys!" they yelled loudly.
"Where the f have you been, Wes?" Shrieked Del. Wes looked flustered at the question.
"Urm…" They said. But before they could come up with an excuse, Malcom arose from his bed screaming.

"Wow! Malcom, you good?" Asked Del, looking down from her bunk. Malcom was drenched and dripping with sweet.
"Sorry I have night terrors sometimes." He apollogised.
"That's fine, we all have a secret that we don't want anyone to find out." Wes said, thinking back to their night of dance with General Tango.

"WAKE UP, YOU PESKY WOMBATS!" came the booming voice of General Tango as he came barging into the room.
"Hey there" Wes winked, making Tango blush bright red. Mal Del and Malcom looked at each other curiously.
"TIME TO TRAIN, MAGGOTS!" Stuttered Tango.

Mal Wes Del and Malcom trained for 2 days, their strength going up and up, their endurance and muscles growing. Soon enough they were outrunning General Tango and all the other students.

One day, however, Mal suddenly woke up in a dark room. He looked around but it was so dark he couldn't see. "Urgh someone needs to put a lightbulb in this room." He had an itch so he reached down to stratch his leg but he couldn't move his arms down. He was chained to the ceiling. "Ooh, kinky" said Mal out loud.
Suddenly a bright light appeared in front of him, he squinted a little to get used to it. "Ah! You're avake!" Said a German voice. The accent was thick.
"Who goes there!" shouted Mal, fear slowly building up in him. His eyes got used to the dark and saw a figure in the doorway of light. They were wearing a black hoodie and all he could see was a wide smile, bearing teeth.
"None of your buzinezz young man" said the German. Their voice was sultry and agonising. Fear welled up inside Mal.
"G-G-G-Get back, please!"
"Hahahahaa" laughed the German, it was piercing and gruesome.
"What do you want from me?!" screamed Mal. The German came closer to Mal, so close, their noses were almost touching. There was something strangely alluring about that. Their breath smelled like vinegar and blood. Odd combination.
"You know exactly vhat I vant." They whispered. Mal still couldn't make out any defining characteristics in this human. Except for the wide, nerve-wracking smile.
"Not really, no"
"I VANT ALL THE SECRETS, YOU MORON!" the German slapped Mal across the face, their nails scratching his face.
"Ouch!" yelped Mal. "I don't have any secrets!" The German stood back, crossed their arms and said:
"Well, in that case, we're going to have to torture it out of you."

"WES! DEL!" Yelled General Tango barging into the log cabin.
"What is it now, Tango?" moaned Wes, "Is your bath water too cold?"
Wes and Del had been playing cards in Malcom's bunk and Malcom was reading a book in Del's bunk.
"No I've already bathed Wes." Complained Tango. "It's Mal! He's gone missing!"
"WHAT?!" said Del and Wes. "Why DIDN'T YOU TELL US BEFORE!"
"I only just found out."
"WELL THAT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH!" Del jumped up and slapped Tango and ran out the door.
"Do you know where he is?" asked Wes approaching Tango with a sultry look in their eyes.
"We used his tracking chip and found him in Germany" said Tango, ignoring the winks that Wes was giving him. "We have a helicopter ready" He turned around and headed out the door. Wes rolled their eyes and followed him out, keeping their eyes on Tango's sweet buttocks.

The helicopter was fairly small. Only Wes, Del and Tango could fit in (including a seat for Mal of course).
"Mind the blades!" Tango chouted as they ducked under the flailing blades of the helicopter. They each took their seats and put on the headphones they have to wear so they can hear each other talk cuz it's very loud in a helicopter.
"Do you have any in blue?" asked Del.
"No"

Soon enough they were in the air, flying over the camp and across the ocean all the way to Germany. Wes and Del slept through most of the journey, their heads together, using each other as a pillow, Del cuddling her crowbar.
After a few hours, Tango jogged Del and Wes awake, Del instinctively smacked Tango in the face with her crowbar.
"Oops, sorry" Del said, casually getting out of the landed aircraft. Wes followed suit and slapped Tango on the booty and winked at him.
"So where we headed, boss?" asked Del.
"Follow me"
They did. Tango led them through a wartorn town. Debris from houses and cars and other unidentifiable objects were scattered all over the broken streets. Wes and Del kept tripping over holes in the road and sidewalk. After 15 minutes of walking, Tango put his finger over his lips and crouched down underneath a house. Both Wes and Del copied him and crouched down next to him. He handed each of them a gun. "For defence" he mouthed to them. He indicated for them to follow him and they went round a corner.
"So are you going to tell me any of the secrets now?" came a voice from inside the house. The accent was German.
"I don't know anything! Please stop!" Mal's voice. Wes and Del's hearts leapt in their chests. They both leaped forward but Tango held them back.
He gave them a look that said "just wait". Wes looked back that said "but he's in trouble!". Tango responded with a look that said "Give it time."

Mal was still chained up, his face had been punched over and over. But the worst was the one that the German themselves did. It was horrific, he had never seen anything like it before. He dreaded for when the German turned around, opened the briefcase and brought out…
"No, not again please!" Mal begged.
"Then tell me the secrets!"
"I don't know any!"
"Looks like it's the feather for you then!" The German came closer, holding the dreaded feather in their hands. Mal screamed in fear.
"OH NO YOU DON'T!" came a voice that Mal recognised, he looked towards the door and there stood Wes and Del, their legs apart, holding guns out towards the German. The German turned around. Wes and Del shot their guns. Perfect aim, right in the middle of the German's forehead.
"Oh you guys!" Mal said, thankful.
"Come on, let's get you down from there" Del unchained his left arm and Wes his right. When he got down his arms ached, but he could walk.
"We need to go quickly, Tango is just outside waiting for us." The trio ran outside and found Tango guarding the door.
"Let's go!" said Wes, Del and Mal.
"Sweet, the helicopter is just up ahead." Suddenly they heard shouts behind them. Other Germans had found the body already and were chasing them.
"We need to hurry! Run!" yelled Tango. The trio followed him in a sprint towards the helicopter. It was starting up already, Mal didn't think they would make it. He sprinted harder and faster, his arms still aching. Wes and Del saw him struggling and helped him along.
"You can do this, Mal!" they shouted in support.

They reached the helicopter just in time, leaping in as they heard gunshots ricochet off the aircraft.
"Phew" They were all out of breath. The trio hugged. "Let's go back to the camp"
All four of them slept in the helicopter. Mal having nightmares about being tickled.

thx 4 reeding! this was written by me! Moist! :D nice to meet you too! 3

pls lik and subscrub :)