This chapter is dedicated to one of the fan fiction authors "CalZonaAndDemi". I have learnt so much from her and somehow her writings worked as an inspiration behind going on with my own writing. I know she will not know that I have dedicated this chapter to her, but I just want to do this. I am a die-hard fan of her writing. Thank you!
Should I make a partial dedication to that girl also? ha ha… no need! I am dedicating myself to her- my whole of me.
I have invested all of me while writing this chapter. Let me know your feelings! I will be waiting listening from you…
Chapter 17
From the dance floor, Callie comes back to Meredith smiling like fools and takes a shot staring at Arizona, who is also popping her dimples looking at Callie. Callie already has made a decision about something and she is not going to back off from her decision. But before doing that she has to talk to Arizona. And she has to talk to her tonight- she can't wait anymore- there is no right moment in life. She texts Arizona, "I want to talk to you about something…can we just sneak out from the party?"
Arizona quickly texts back, "okay, my place because Sophia is staying with me tonight" and Callie is quickest in replying, "yes, I am going out right now and after few minutes, you also leave."
Putting the cell in the pocket, Callie comes forward and informs her friends that she is not feeling well and going home. Arizona also quietly leaves after waiting few minutes.
Entering into the apartment, Arizona pays the baby sitter and closes the door. "Sophia is off to bed, so we can talk… but after what I said to you in the bar, I thought you would want to do something else and no talking!" Arizona winks seductively leading Callie towards the couch. Callie stops Arizona and kisses her in the softest way and sighs against her lips , "Arizona, I love you and I love you more than I have ever loved you. So now I want to do everything in the right way..." Arizona looks at Callie's face and realizes how Callie means each of the said words. Callie's heart starts beating like a teenager and Arizona being pressed against her chest can feel the adrenaline in Callie's blood and her warm breath. She pants out, "Calliope! What's this?"
"Arizona, you asked me why did I sleep just before I broke up?" Callie looks at the other woman with her full eyes. But Arizona does not say anything; she rather leads Callie to the couch and makes both of them sitting comfortably. She really wants to know the reason. She has been thinking about this since last two years and maybe this is one of the reasons, for which she could have never got over the divorce. Every night since then she has been thinking about that last night.
-"I thought a lot… and I guess I just wanted to express my frustration over everything happened in between us. We were always too sexually attracted to each other. So, that one month made me angry at you and probably I kind of used sex as a way to put you down- it was maybe a way to show you how I could make you do whatever I wanted to do."
-"Yes, you did," Arizona sighs. "Callie, I cannot tell you how long it took me to accept the break up after that amazing night, you just left me at the therapist's office alone and broken without giving any explanation." Arizona's blue eyes glistens slowly, "I could never date anybody else after that."
-"Good that you did not," Callie tells while wiping her tears affectionately, "I am here now to give you every explanation you want, to listen everything you tell." She tugs a golden hair behind Arizona's ear.
-" I have something else to tell you and now that you have started… In LA, I told you the half truth"
-"hmm!" Callie knows that now Arizona will talk and she decides not to interrupt her. She pulls Arizona towards herself and holds her affectionately. Arizona rests her chin on Callie's chest and starts playing with Callie's fingers.
-"I did not sleep with Lauren only to prove things to myself. I wanted to hurt you more than anything," saying this she looks up, while feeling Callie's sudden stiff body against her. Callie's eyes are wide and water has started forming, but Arizona continues looking at those brown eyes, "when I was in the wood, all I thought about Sophia and you and nothing else mattered. I tried to save Mark because I knew how important he was to you." She stops and looks down, "maybe important than me." Hearing this Callie feels a strong knot in her stomach- for the first time she feels how everything went wrong from the beginning, but she does not reply, rather she holds Arizona more securely pacing a soft kiss on her head. Feeling the comfort in Callie's hands, Arizona goes on, "then I came back to you…my leg was gone and you never told me that it was not you who cut my leg. Then also I tried hard, but always found you talking about how you missed Mark and you never asked me how I did survive. I felt that you never understood me and my pain." Arizona takes a long breath in, "I wanted to snatch the security you had with me… you always had me, but I always had to share you with other people. I never was in a serious relationship in my life except you. So, I wanted you to feel the pain of losing something." Arizona starts crying hiding her face in Callie's chest.
Callie pulls her up. While she is crying too, she wipes Arizona's tears and says in a deep husky voice, "Arizona, there was never anybody important than you- even not Mark. Mark was my best friend and you were my everything. You are my everything. I knew that you did not like Mark but I never knew that I was making you this insecure." Callie stops and kisses softly on Arizona's forehead taking both her hands in her grip and then slowly she kisses Arizona's both hands, "I am telling you today and this is for the rest of our life that there will not be anyone who will be important than you ever… you are the only person I have been falling in love since last 10 years." Callie cups Arizona's face and kisses her left cheek and mumbles on her ear, "I always wanted to ask you about your days after the crash, but I was afraid of losing you. You stopped talking about anything- so I kept talking with stuff just for the sake of talking." Callie again kisses Arizona's right cheek and slowly comes down her jaw line placing soft kisses. She murmurs in between the kisses, "I was so afraid of losing you that I stopped even hugging you… I wanted to make you feel that does not matter you have a leg or not, you are mine and only mine." Arizona feels as if she has been waiting her whole life that one day Callie would tell this to her- the assurance she always wanted when they were married.
"Callie, I am yours and please do not let me do this again…do not let me bail and run away… I am sorry that I destroyed everything," Arizona blubbers while Callie kisses her eyes. "Nobody can kiss me like you do."
Callie wipes Arizona's moist cheeks and strokes them with her thumbs, while looking deep in those blue eyes, "how could I never tell you that my heart never loved anyone else, once it met you. She suddenly stands up from the couch and bends down in front of Arizona on her knees. Looking up, Callie slowly starts taking out the prosthetic revealing the half limb. Although Arizona feels rigid, she decides not to stop her. Callie gently touches the limb and says, "I accept you the way you are- with leg or without leg. There will ever be no Mark and no Simi in between us. I am not the same young hotshot anymore- now all I want to grow old with you". She kisses the bruised part of the limb, Arizona feels a strong ping in her heart. Arizona looks down while tears again starts moistening her pale cheeks, "Calliope, all I want to spend the rest of my life with you and I want you to be last person I would say I love you and the only person to touch me ever." Arizona pulls Callie in a hug and suddenly laughs, "Calliope, you are still the same hotshot, maybe hotter than before."
"Nah!" Callie pulls up from the hug, "not more than you… you have such an amazing body which can derive anyone mad." Callie swallows hard visualizing Arizona's naked body under her. Arizona plays with the button of Callie's top, "it derived mad somebody two years back. So, I am not sure about right now.
" Two years…you did not have…" Callie starts feeling fire on her body. Arizona just looks at her with sincerity and does not say anything. Callie knows that Arizona has not been into any relationships after the divorce, but she has not been involved with anyone else physically is certainly a shocking piece of news to Callie. She quietly puts the prosthetic back to Arizona's limb and gets up. "You know I should go now," right now Callie knows that if she does not go, she will not be able to control herself physically. She has never felt this much attracted to anybody else, even not to Arizona when they were married. She feels her head is almost spinning out of uncontrollable physical desire towards the other woman.
Callie moves to the kitchen counter to get a glass of water and backs Arizona. While sipping slowly she is trying to control her burning sensation and is thinking how to slip out right now without making things embarrassing for both of them. Suddenly she feels Arizona pressed on her back, "stay," Arizona says in a rasping voice. Callie turns to see her and immediately her lips are caught in a passionate kiss. Although Callie's mind is reeling, she decides to understand the situation first. "Arizona!" she pushes Arizona slightly. Arizona takes a step back and very unhurriedly pulls out her top, "show me how much you love me." Arizona starts backing looking at Callie's brown eyes. Callie catches her wrist and pulls her close. "Arizona, no one is as beautiful as you are," she says while unbuttoning Arizona's bra and letting it drop on the floor. Her hands starts exploring the naked back of the woman, whose body once she knew so well. But, right now everything seems so new to her. Arizona quickly removes Callie's leather jacket and attacks the neck. Callie loudly moans- no one can explore her neck the way Arizona does. "Arizona, I missed you," she grabs the golden hair and pulls them backward to make space, so that she could kiss the neck, which used to be her favorite pulse point. Arizona pushes Callie against the kitchen counter and passionately places open mouth kisses on Callie's jaw line and comes down to the neck. Callie laughs while moaning, "I think our second first time should not be on the kitchen counter". They start moving to the bedroom while leaving the trail of unwanted cloths on the floor.
Loving is always the easiest part to do, the hardest part is committing to that love. For me love is that lifelong promise which gives us a reason to go on, a reason to live, a reason to fight and a reason not to give up on each other, even though we might not be together.